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is honesty really the best policy??
im always very honest up front and real with people. i dont sugar coat anything, dont say things about other people i wouldnt say to them, and all other things along those lines.
everytime i try to do the right thing and be honest and tell people how i feel about things it always backfires.
people say they want honesty but i swear to god anytime i give it out i get shit on.
please give me your honest opinions (srsly)
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Re: is honesty really the best policy??
The other day a girl in the dressing room was talking about how tired she was and I said "yeah , you look really tired". I felt so bad for saying it, i dont know why but i keep thinking about how rude that must have sounded even though it was the truth. I kind of don't think before I speak and it's awful how honest I am sometimes.
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Re: is honesty really the best policy??
story of my life it doesnt help that i have very little inner monologue.
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Re: is honesty really the best policy??
theres a little thing called tact and another called time and place. Sometimes its ok to ignore both me them though but usually one or the other is the yay to go.
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Re: is honesty really the best policy??
Ask yourself if you can handle honesty back. If you can, go for it.
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Re: is honesty really the best policy??
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Originally Posted by
GentlemanX
Ask yourself if you can handle honesty back. If you can, go for it.
i can and i do appreciate it.
sometimes i think life would be easier if i was just the lying money grubbing fakeass that i am at work.
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Re: is honesty really the best policy??
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Originally Posted by
MeanGirl
The other day a girl in the dressing room was talking about how tired she was and I said "yeah , you look really tired". I felt so bad for saying it, i dont know why but i keep thinking about how rude that must have sounded even though it was the truth. I kind of don't think before I speak and it's awful how honest I am sometimes.
a girl was asking everyone if they liked her outfit. everyone was saying yes. i said no. she said i was supposed to say yes. i was like ok well i would want someone to tell me...
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Re: is honesty really the best policy??
Nobody wants to hear the cold hard truth. We want "honesty" but humans are much too sensitive creatures. It must be paired with compassion.
Honesty + compassion = sugar coating (or tact.)
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Re: is honesty really the best policy??
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Re: is honesty really the best policy??
^^^ I have to tell you the funniest thing, but I just can't say it on the internet. I'll pm you. :)
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Re: is honesty really the best policy??
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Originally Posted by
LuckyOne
^^^ I have to tell you the funniest thing, but I just can't say it on the internet. I'll pm you. :)
thats still the internet ;)
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Re: is honesty really the best policy??
I dont think it's a bad thing.
My husband is like that. He'll tell me the truth no matter what. There are sometimes when I want a sugarcoated answer to a question, sometimes you just want to hear it. I don't ask him when I want that. If I want the gods honest truth, I go to him.
We were working together and a girl came in to see about dancing. She asked him is he thought she could dance. He looked her over and said "lose about 10 pounds and yeah". She looked at me shocked. All I could do is say "you asked. Don't ask if you're not prepared to hear all the possible answers."
IBI, don't change, your brutal honesty is one of the things I like about you. (remind me I said that when I ask something and then say I dont' like your answer!LOL)
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Re: is honesty really the best policy??
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Originally Posted by
Susan-Va
IBI, don't change, your brutal honesty is one of the things I like about you. (remind me I said that when I ask something and then say I dont' like your answer!LOL)
heheh i shall ;)
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Re: is honesty really the best policy??
I like honesty. I remember in 8th grade this girl told me she was sick of my hair b/c when i did it in curls i never curled the ends so it was all curly and then had strait little ends(tbh i think my hair was so thin i just gripped the curling iron where it wouldnt slip through). I taught myself to do it and I thought i was doin it right, but i never did it that way again. I wish more people would point stuff like that out so i dont look like an idiot. When i ask someone if something looks good i have to preface it with "pleeease tell me the truth", even if they are lying I can usually tell by facial expression.
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Re: is honesty really the best policy??
yeah people seems to want the truth til they get it and its not what they want to hear.
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Re: is honesty really the best policy??
If you are hurting people then I dont think its a good thing. But my best friends are the ones that are honest to a fault. Even though sometimes I walk away stinging from something they have said, I know they love me as I am so I can accept anything they have to say. If its coming from a stranger then I more often think they are just making themselves feel important by being tough or something. But perhaps if I knew them it might be different.
You are how you are, if you cant change it then you might as well love it.
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Re: is honesty really the best policy??
"Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it."
- Mark Twain
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Re: is honesty really the best policy??
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Originally Posted by
Flick6
You are how you are, if you cant change it then you might as well love it.
i used to, now i just feel its a form of self sabotage.
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Re: is honesty really the best policy??
"Honesty may be the best policy, but it's important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy."
-George Carlin
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Re: is honesty really the best policy??
From personal experience I'd have to say no-- I have ended/lost several relationship in my life from telling people the truth when they asked it. In the end they just couldn't handle the truth or maybe they wanted to be lied to, but there was drama to follow, things went down from there and the relationships slowly (or quickly) ended. I guess it really depends on the person and what they can handle. I have known people that I can tell the the truth about ANYTHING- and nothing ever changes. But its really a catch 22 and your damned if you do and damned if you don't with most people.
I look back over some of the relationships I've lost because of the truth and think "wow I totally should have lied & things would be different" Then I think--- well thats not quite right either because this person is accepting me for the person I portray myself as rather than who I really am. So its really better to have someone love me for me vs. who they "think" I am? In the end its best to be true to yourself and let others make there own decisions from the truth at hand. But telling the truth has often got me in more trouble than lying.
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Re: is honesty really the best policy??
We approach life like it has on/off switches. Honesty? Or not?
The fact is that human needs run in multitudes of spectrums, and each spectrum has its optimum point, and the points are different for each person. Being able to find those optimal points in others makes one a good communicator. Not caring about those points in others makes life simpler but lonelier.
I like honesty, too, but I gauge what I say to people by the hurt it may cause. I have a high tolerance for brutal honesty. Others don't. What works for me doesn't work for them. I tailor my communications accordingly.
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Re: is honesty really the best policy??
honesty is the best policy imho.
BUT, complete disclosure isn't always necessary. keeping silent isn't lying.
just because it's the/your truth, doesn't mean you have to volunteer the info/comment/opinion/etc.
but i abhor liars. you lie, you kill a bit of your soul. you lie, you waste your time and mine. you can't tell me the truth, then don't say anything to me.
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Re: is honesty really the best policy??
In regards to "losing" people that required being lied to in order to maintain the relationship....you didn't "lose" anything because it wasn't real to begin with. I feel ya on your point IBI though, it isn't always easy.
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Re: is honesty really the best policy??
i say no because apparently my bluntness offends people. i feel like i'm constantly telling people: "just to let you know i'm really honest" and they say "no no it's okay" and i tell them and then they get really butt-hurt.
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Re: is honesty really the best policy??
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Originally Posted by
rubyredlipsss
i say no because apparently my bluntness offends people. i feel like i'm constantly telling people: "just to let you know i'm really honest" and they say "no no it's okay" and i tell them and then they get really butt-hurt.
story of my life.