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Funny Stripper Milestones
So, tonight, after over two years stripping and over a year of reading your stories about it, I finally saw a (drunk) stripper pee in a dressing room trashcan. I tried to stop her, but only succeeded in getting her to not pee in the trashcan closest to my section of countertop. At the end of the night, I had to pull that same trashcan in front of her so she could throw up into it.
I feel kind of like this was a milestone in my stripping career. We all know about things like "the first time you make $1000," but what other entertaining milestones have you had in your stripping career?
Here's some of mine:
- first time watching a drunk girl pee in a trashcan
- wearing through my first pair of stripper shoes, and realizing it when they broke on stage
- working a Race Week in Charlotte, NC
- working whie the Superbowl was in town
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I thought it kind of funny when I fell on stage. Actually, I fell OFF the stage. I can't think of any others right now but I'm sure it'll pop into my head a little later.
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Hmm, well, I've only been at it for about 5 months, so I haven't hit that many yet.
I can think of a lot of milestones I'm waiting for, such as:
1. First time not to make the tip-out/house fees (I feel lucky not to have hit this milestone yet).
2. Having someone make it rain on me.
3. Joining the $1000 club
4. Working during Mardi Gras
5. Spending my whole shift in VIP
6. Inverting on the pole
Hmm, this is turning into a list of goals rather than milestones!
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I remember the first time I learned to booty pop!
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I like this thread idea!
First pole move (basic step onto pole with one leg stuck straight out--spin)
Wearing through my first pair of shoes! They didn't break, but it made me realize like 'oh my god. I must actually be serious about this.'
First fall-- I've only ever fallen once, and it was on stage. Kind of a graceful crumple.
First request for extras (some guy asked for a blow job when I was first starting, and I was horrified. Which is funny since it's SO common!)
First time witnessing a chick check for her tampon string--so casually, in the middle of the dressing room. I was like...damn...homegirl has confidence! Then I realized most girls do this.
First lap dance. The guy I danced for was so fat that I couldn't even get close enough to make it sexy. Add that to the fact that I dance at a no contact club and had never even seen someone give a lap dance before, and that had to be the worst waste of $20 for him everrr.
I'm sure there are soooo many more...
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Re: Funny Stripper Milestones
Quote:
Originally Posted by
tempest666
I remember the first time I learned to booty pop!
I really want to hit this milestone. I've been practicing clenching those butt muscles and shaking the cheeks, but it just doesn't look right yet.
ooh-- I just thought of some more milestones:
--the first time I answered my phone and heard, "Hello, Karma?" (my stage name).
--making a large purchase with all $1 bills
--forgetting my pin number because I hadn't pulled cash out of the ATM in FOREVER.
--the first time a guy whipped his penis out during a lap dance.
--the first time a guy CAME during a lap dance (I did NOT see that coming--no pun intended)
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^^ Ah! Yes! I'd totally forgotten about the 'making a large purchace with $1 bills' milestone. And forgetting the pin number--priceless and SO true! I haven't withdrawn money in foreeeever! Great additions. ::biggrin::
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Yay, these are great! I had totally forgotten about "first large purchase with $1 bills." I bought groceries after work at got a really funny look from the cashier.
And of course, the first time a drunk guy tried to grab my cooter while I was on stage. (I don't know why, but "cooter" is like the funniest word on earth to me lately.)
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Re: Funny Stripper Milestones
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Winged Dinghy
--the first time I answered my phone and heard, "Hello, Karma?" (my stage name).
--making a large purchase with all $1 bills
Haha I totally relate to these!
I paid for textbooks and supplies at the student store last month when the semester started and hadn't planned ahead very well because I didn't deposit that weekend's money into my ATM and had just paid rent SO my debit card did not have enough to cover the books. I decided to just pay with some of the cash from working that weekend and the poor lady had already rung up over $200 worth of stuff when I realized I had some twenties, but I was going to have to literally stand there and count out like $80 in ones! It took forever, the store was FULL of people looking strangely at me, and then the lady laughed loudly when I finished and said at the top of her lungs, "WOW, you must be a waitress - OR A STRIPPER! hahahaha!!" >:( No one at school knows what I do so needless to say I turned the color of a tomato.
And answering to your dance name becomes like second nature. Sometimes IRL I have to catch myself before I introduce myself by the wrong name since I'm so used to doing that with strangers. ::)
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i used to deposit all my cash at the bank. so many one dollar bills, so many questioning glances. i told them they were tips and that i was a hairstylist. yet i never had checks to deposit....
milestones:
- first pair of broken shoes. i've broken five or six pairs since then.
-being found out by my family
-working other jobs and always closing out the register because i could count it out the fastest.
-watching someone snort coke for the first time
-first pole trick (also the straight legged spinning move!)
-first time making enough to pay my rent and all of my bills in one night
milestones i can't wait to cross:
-breaking $1000
-being a top earner
-traveling and stripping
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I think I've hit the falling on stage milestone about 110 times.
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^^ Extra credit!!:biggrin:
Another milestone-- having to 'come out' to someone for the first time as a stripper.
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This one will be fun.
- buying my first round of groceries entirely in 1's.
- first time climbing the pole (and then proceeding to not know how to get down and half-sliding, half-falling)
- first time falling on stage
- first time a custie came during a dance (ew...)
- first time a custie pulled his cock out on me (EW...)
- first time breaking $200
- first time admitting I was a stripper to a "normal" person and realizing I was *totally* okay with it.
- first request for extras! I was asked to give a blowjob, if it was okay for him to eat me out, and then how much it was for me to fuck him by THREE DIFFERENT GUYS in ONE NIGHT. I could have died.
- first time I heard someone call my stage name in the middle of a public place and assumed they were talking to me, when there was actually a girl named that name he was talking to. That was fun.
- first time forgetting myself and introducing myself as my stage name. That happens a LOT more than I care to admit ...
I'm sure I'm fogetting some, but these are the ones I can remember!
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-First time auditioning at a new club and impressing the other girls. (I don't stay long at those clubs.)
-First time waking up in a pile of glitter--and I don't really wear glitter. . . .
-First time not caring enough about not having done my nails, taken a shower, or shaved my cooter to still go in to work and bank anyway.
-First pole inversion.
-First gift from a regular.
-First time being followed home by a customer/ found at my other job/ apartment being broken into.
-First time being bought a drink.
-First stripper "girlfriend."
-First dance for a woman.....
Might add more later.....
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Re: Funny Stripper Milestones
-ditto on the strippers peeing in the dressing room trashcan
-wearing through my first (and only) pair of shoes, and having to go buy new ones (pretty recently)
-someone making it rain on me
-first pole trick
-first time a custie came (and admitted it) in a dance
-first time getting a guy kicked out for getting grabby
-first time being told that customers call work asking if I'm scheduled
-first time breaking $1000
-first time having the best dancer there ask me if I could do her eye makeup like I do mine
-working Saratoga track season
-first time a guy offered over $3000 for the night--turned it down, of course, and didn't really realize how tempting that would be to some until the other girls were shocked I wouldn't do it
-first time being able to copy a pole trick exactly just by watching another girl do it
-first time being able to mount the pole and grip it without it pinching my thighs
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Maybe the first week I danced ever...
bent over to ask a guy for a dance and he grabbed my boob.
I promptly slapped him across the face.
Probably a milestone for him too actually. :D
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- First time getting fired, then being called into work 3 days later.
- First invert
- First $1000 (okay it was $996, but I bought a sandwich while on shift)
- First double shift to reach a financial goal (car down payment) and reached my $$ goal.
- First time a customer refused to pay for a lap dance (and the bouncer didn't help) was a real milestone and changed how I did business
- First cosmetic procedure
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^^ Damn sandwiches! I've totally had that moment where I was $4 or $5 from my goal because of something I bought while working. I have at least one outfit that was "mentally expensive" that way.
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-First time wearing through shoes
-First pole trick
-First time breaking $700 in a night
-First time I got rained on
-First time a custy came during a dance...ew
-First time being asked for extras....ew again
-First time physically attacking a customer
-First time getting a customer kicked out
-Introducing myself by my stage name OTC...haha..erm
-First regular custy....his name was Snake....and he was a sweety :D Ah..I miss him
That's all I can think of at the moment.
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was snake an older truck driver with a beard?
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Re: Funny Stripper Milestones
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Ruby Ruckus
was snake an older truck driver with a beard?
No...he was a New Yorker that came to Greenville SC on business alot. Tatted from his neck down. Explained to me once that he had a girlfriend in NY and at his place in Cali and wanted me to live in his house in Greenville. In the year and three clubs I've worked at he was the only customer I didn't think was bullshittin me. Simply because he didn't say he would take care of me. He was like...I don't expect you to quit working and depend on me and I don't want you to think I want to marry you either. :O Sweet guy actually.
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First time I got showered on stage - a guy had $200 in singles sprinkled on me. The crazy part was, of course, the fact that there were bills all over the stage, making it impossible to dance - I kept almost slipping on the papers! And then, at the end of my set, trying to gracefully collect the bills, lol. I'd have preferred 2 crisp benjamins, but I suppose where's the fun there, haha.
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these are crackn me up!
-first time to get a VIP room w/ a custie who i didn't have to talk to before
-first time my period soaked through my bottoms on stage and another girl had to come up there and tell me (it was really obvious)
-first time getting so drunk i could barely work/dance/talk to custies
-first time to have a custie cum during a lap dance
-first time to be scared of a stalker custie
-first time to do a lap dance w/ another dancer (tandem)
-first time to do a lap dance/VIP room, duh we all had that first early on...but it was scary!
-first time to see somebody i know from outside the club on the tip rail while i was dancing (that's happened twice, i look up and i'm like "hey, I know u!"
-first time to be asked if a custie could see my cooch for a dollar (ooooh, one whole dollar!)
-first time to be tipped a $100 for nothing, and kept 'em coming!
-first time to hit my head on stage (done that twice, ouch!)
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-freaking out in public when someone calls my stage name
-freaking out in the club when you thought you hear your real name
-blanking out on what your name is. haha
-i have a skirt i wear at work and i fold it over so its shorter. and i automatically did this when going to my boyfriend's house. haha he about had a heart attack.
-paying for gas in all ones (thankfully this is the largest purchase ive made since i started)
-awkward sneaky attempts to hide the fact that you have a huge wad of cash in your purse.