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Aggressive Flirting
Any advice on how to be an aggressive flirt. I really wanna learn that part cause its such a big part in being a stripper, oh man it'll also help me overcome my shyness lol. I've looked up books about flirting but it doesnt help cause i'm not flirting with a guy on the street that I may like. I'm flirting with someone for money and have to be more aggressive, sexual, touchy feely and play with his head. So how do i do that, what are some thing i can do and especially say. Please help i wanna be better at what i do im tierd of not making money like the rest of the girls. I got the look and personality i just dont have to talk. I'll talk to customers no problem but i feel they're not interested cause i talk about stupid shit like anything that pops in my head. IF i learn to flity it'll be about the customer and no me (in a way). PLEASE with sugar on top and sprinkles. ;D
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Re: Aggressive Flirting
You say the rest of the girls are making money, so why not just sit back and watch how they act for a little bit?
I usually find some way to touch the customer, whether it be just having my hand on his back and slightly rubbing it, having my hand on his inner thigh, running my nails a LITTLE bit through his head to show him how well I can relax him. If he says something funny and I laugh, I might touch him slightly, too (hard to explain).
I try not to look around. When I'm speaking to him, I'm only concentrating on HIM. Unless he's a looking around, too (and yes, some guys do this even though they're interested in you, so don't let that necessarily be a sign that he won't spend).
I guess what I do isn't overly aggressive. I mean, I talk dirty sometimes, which I explained in another post.
Now, I've seen some REALLY aggressive dancers, and they're methods have worked. In some clubs I've worked in, girls make eye contact, strut over to a guy (sexy walk), straddle them, start rubbing their heads or massaging their shoulders or neck, and they whisper in their ears. I'm not sure what they're whispering, but odds are that it's mostly dirty talk. We're definitely not allowed to do that in the club I work at now, though.
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Re: Aggressive Flirting
Wait, did you try "Superflirt" by Tracy Cox? Because I'm usually pretty shy, but it definitely helped me with my work flirting.
Don't talk about stupid shit that just pops up in your head! You know that already.
Important: You have to act like you think he's sexy, and that you WANT to dance for him, not because you want the money and you think he's old and gross, but because he's so sexy you can't handle yourself anymore. If you keep that in mind, your flirting will make more sense, and less like it's ditzy and all over the place.
Everything you say has to feel that way.
"Hi, how's it going?" (make it feel like you came over because you thought he was special)
"What's YOUR name?" (make him feel like you like him and want to meet him)
"When did you get in today? How is your visit so far? Etc. Where are you from" (make it sound like, "where have you been all my life?")
"What do you do for work? Or outside work? OOoooo that's so cool!!" (tell him he's smart or strong or interesting, etc. ESPECIALLY if he has a REALLY BORING JOB. Like computers or construction. They want it the most. Play it up.)
"Have you been here before? Do you like getting dances? What kind of girls do you like?" (start hinting that you want to rub yourself on him because he's so attractive)
"I bet you're a good dancer/ I like your style/ You're so cute" (This is when you flirt harder, and you tickle his arm or rub his neck and tilt your head and play with your hair and stuff)
And when you can gauge that he's into you, or into you ENOUGH, drop the bomb and say "Hey, do you wanna go to the back with me?" or whatever, I always just say, "Are you gonna get a dance today? With ME?" just cute enough with a smile so that they smile back and say yes or maybe, and then you say, "Yay! Let's go right now!" and take their hand and go.
But don't act like you just made a sale! Act like you just scored a hot piece of ass and you can't wait to have them to yourself, and make him feel like a king as you're walking back to the dance area with him- hold his hand, touch his shoulder, you know, be sweet.
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Re: Aggressive Flirting
I think I'm a natural flirt, and really my flirting techniques inside the club aren't much different from outside the club. Honestly, I think hands on training really helps... I used to be super shy and came out of it during high school. Most of my friends were really outgoing and eventually after getting dragged to enough parties and being forced to flirt in order to get what we wanted... I just got good at it. So my suggestion is to gather up a bunch of friends and hit the nightclubs, then watch them talk their way into free drinks, vip, bypass security etc. It's pretty much the same techniques. A lot of it is body language, eye contact, touching and the inflections in your voice. The simplest sentence could be turned into flirting with those things.
If you don't have friends to watch read Super Flirt.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A7yaX9-GNeU
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Re: Aggressive Flirting
Keep the focus on him. Ask him questions and be fascinated by his anwsers, everything you say should be centered around what he wants to talk about.
Be touchy but not overly touchy or he'll figure why dance, I can get this for free.