Originally Posted by
Kimbre
When I first started working in some of the "higher hustle" clubs, I was always getting rejected, and these other girls were going back to do their private dances left and right. I started to wonder what was wrong with me. I was a complete NEWB with BEWBS! I had no idea.
First of all, I didn't know that you could charge whatever you wanted for private dances. I bet those girls were in the dressing room laughing at me, because I was SO by the book... I didn't know any better, I always tried to sell dances for the full amount, and I never made deals or bargained. I made it really hard on myself being like that. You've gotta be willing to finagle and entice them into going back there if you want to start getting that kind of action. Don't piss the other girls off by selling your dances so cheap that they can't make any money, and that you wear the skin on your butt cheeks off, but like, maybe every third customer you can give him a 2 for 1 dance, or save that for your special customers - or the guy who is there with his buddies, definitely give him a 2 for 1 dance, because he'll probably tell his friends, and maybe they'll buy your dances too. That's one way of increasing the amount of time you spend back there once you get back there.
Secondly, when I've not worked as a dancer, I've worked in sales. In my experience, when you're dealing with a customer, and you're trying to get them to buy your product or service, you've got to give them every reason to go wherever or do whatever you want them to do. Don't ask them open-ended questions, and don't let them control too much of the conversation. You're not taking your clothes off as a conversation piece. Also, try to be enthusiastic when you're visiting with them so when it's time to ask or hint at the dance they think you're in a good mood and up-beat. I don't want to ruin your hustle, because everyone does it differently, but you shouldn't say, You've just given him/her an opportunity to tell you flat out NO. I try to avoid that if possible. I've found that once you give the customer the opportunity to say no, if they take it, you're ruined. When you figure out how to recover from that NO, please drop me a line, because I STILL have no idea what to do at that point.
Try phrasing it a little differently. Say something like, "I love chatting with you, but I think we should go somewhere a little more private," or "Let's take this someplace more private, Sweetie." You don't have to say exactly that, you can say anything to get him interested in going back there with you. You also don't have to promise him the moon to get him to go back there, but you do want him to realize that your company isn't free. Especially if he's talking your ear off about his prize pig or whatever. ::) I try to say stuff like this on those nights that I feel like I'm getting a lot more rejection than usual.
The other thing to think about is, maybe you're just not approaching the "right" guys. I've heard the standards for tipping are somewhat different in Oz, but I'm sure you probably get a few guys at your stage now and again. Be sure you're talking to them when you get off the stage. I know you probably know that, and it's so simple to put that together, but nobody told me this when I first started, and I honestly didn't understand this logic until I was a few months into dancing. The same with the guy who randomly buys you a drink as soon as you're getting offstage. Find out who he is, and get over there and talk to him! When I was a NEWB, I didn't care about that, I'd eventually get to those guys who actually wanted my attention, but I didn't know I should show them more attention than these other jerkasses in the bar, and so I'd end up spending my whole night talking to the wrong guy who had absolutely no interest in me (and probably no money either) - then I'd end up wondering why I couldn't sell dances. :banghead: If a guy comes up to your stage or buys you a drink, consider him a good lead for a table dance or private show, or whatever other upsells/extras your club has to offer. Don't let that slip away. Make him the FIRST guy you visit with when you get offstage. Not focusing on the right customers when I first started dancing probably cost me hundreds of thousands of dollars, not to mention prospective regulars. Gawd, had I known then what I know now... (sigh) Live and learn.
Anyway, yeah, I totally sympathize with your situation. Don't let this affect your performance at work or your attitude toward the customers. Work on a few things that you can do consistently, and do them well, like greeting customers, introducing yourself, and remembering their names, especially if they've been in the bar for several hours, they'll really be impressed if you approach them and say something like, "Well hello there, Jake! I'm glad you're still here Avery! Are you having a good time Micah?" Schmooze him a bit, and then hit him up for the dance, USING HIS NAME! Crap like that really works. too. It's ridiculous, and its UBER cheesy, but people love to hear their names.
And yes, "Wanna dance?" actually "does" work - you've got to assume that people want what you're selling, even if they don't know it yet. You've also got to be prepared to get rejected. Someone is going to eventually buy your dance. It's playing the law of averages. I've seen girls walk around and ask everyone in the bar that same question, and the rejection never breaks their stride or ruins their attitude. The good thing about this approach to selling dances is, hopefully your club is busy enough that you'll not have to keep asking the same people over and over. A girl I once worked with in my home club used to buzz around the dressing room before her making her rounds on the floor saying: "PERSISTENCE WEARS DOWN RESISTANCE!" over and over again. Maybe you can try telling yourself that. Her theory was that the more you bugged people for dances, the more you wore them down to the point where eventually you could get them to buy at least ONE dance, just to get you to go away in some cases, LOL. I thought this was crazy, but it was magic for her. She said it, she meant it, and she lived it. I think about that too sometimes on slow nights. It's kind of motivating.
Those are just a few things I've learned to help get myself back into the private dance area. It sucks having to "play these conversation games," and keep a notepad in my purse so I can keep track of the guys I visit with, but I don't mind going the extra mile when I sell those few extra dances and reap the benefits after tip out.
Good luck. You can do it! I hope something I've said here helps.