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feel weird about going to club alone
I went to a strip club with a few friends for the first time a few months ago, and I had a lot of fun. I really enjoyed it more than I thought I would, probably because it was a high end club and the dancers were gorgeous, nice, and were good at the 'method acting' that goes along with the job. I bought dances from half a dozen of the dancers, but I had to go
since the designated driver wanted to leave (good thing there was a designated driver...I'm sure our waitress was sick of bringing drinks!)
After the visit, I was surprised that my friends didn't enjoy it as much as I did (mostly out of guilt, since they both have serious girlfriends and feel
the club visit was almost cheating-but they may have had less fun since they only spent about $30 each compared to the $150-200 I spent).
The trip mentioned above was out of the norm for me, since most of
my friends are religious, are married, or are in serious relationships. I have enough disposable income to visit the club (probably because I don't have a serious relationship, kids, mortgage, live modestly etc). I have almost went to visit the club on my own because I had so much fun
the last time I went. However, I've stopped myself from going since I feel kind of weird about going alone.
I really want to go, but I have a fear that the entertainers/other patrons would think I was weird for being there by myself. I was thinking I could go the bar at the club and have a few drinks there and have the bartender or someone else tell the dancers I was interested in that I wanted a dance (or more) instead of just sitting watching the stage to see if any of the dancers would approach. I have read other threads about this topic that say dancers don't really care if the customer is alone or not/ugly or not as long as the customer spends money and isn't a grabby jerk. Maybe I am just anxious because when I usually go out to bars/regular clubs I'm with other people? Another reason that I think I'm hesitating is that sometimes I'm insecure about my looks (which I realize is kind of stupid in a strip club context since I still had fun and had dancers approach the last time I visited despite not being a male model). I also might be anxious about it since I don't have much strip club experience/haven't gone alone before.
Have any other customers had this feeling? How did you overcome it?
Entertainers, do you avoid guys that come in alone for any reason? All I want to do is get dances/have a few drinks/maybe a little conversation and leave. Also, do you think it is okay to ask a bartender/floor guy to bring over a certain dancer or tell them what kind of dancer you like to get dances from? The last time I visited there were several dancers I wanted to dance for me that danced on stage but never seemed to be on the floor.
Boy was that long-maybe I just need to quit being so uptight, go to an atm, and not care about whether people think I'm weird or not.
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Re: feel weird about going to club alone
Dude. Guys who are alone are my target demographic. It means they are there to enjoy the girls, not party with their buddies.
Plus, you'll only be alone for a few mins til a beautiful girl keeps you company!
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Re: feel weird about going to club alone
well, we are strippers, not mind-readers. if you see someone you like, by all means ask her to come over. :) sometimes i find it so funny that guys are surprised i'll come and dance for them. did they really think i'd say no?
honestly, it weirds me out more when guys are 'there for their friends'. srsly, what are they going to do, make bathroom trips together and wipe each others' asses?!
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Re: feel weird about going to club alone
I prefer customers who are alone. It's easier than dealing with the party vibe that overtakes groups, plus it's easier to be one guys ideal than to try to appeal to the entire group. If one guy isn't into a dancer, he will often encourage his friend to pick a girl that is more his ideal (which often doesn't appeal to his friend). This often causes groups to be less likely to buy dances ime.
Why are you worried about your appearance? It's our job to make you feel like the most attractive man on the planet. Be clean and neat and smell good and your dancer will be happy. Also, trust me here, most guys that go to SC's aren't male models.
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Re: feel weird about going to club alone
For myself, going alone is the best way.
Nothing wrong with asking the waitress or bartender to contact a particular dancer for you.
Something you may want to try is this, take a stack of ones and sit at the stage. When you see a dancer you want a private dance with, tip her extra and ask her for a private dance when her stage set is finished.
The bottom line is if you're spending money everything will be fine and you will have a lot of fun.
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Re: feel weird about going to club alone
Alone is the best, lots of girls will likely approach you. And you can ask the bartender/waitress to invite girls over as well. The world is your oyster man, just do it!
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Re: feel weird about going to club alone
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Originally Posted by
thatguy6673
I really want to go, but I have a fear that the entertainers/other patrons would think I was weird for being there by myself. I was thinking I could go the bar at the club and have a few drinks there and have the bartender or someone else tell the dancers I was interested in that I wanted a dance (or more) instead of just sitting watching the stage to see if any of the dancers would approach.
Go for it. The 1st time that I went alone, it felt strange, but I got over it soon enough.
Besides if you go with other folks, someone inevitably wants to leave or try another club right when you're having fun. >:(
Going alone, you can stay as long or as short as you want and not worry about leaving you friends behind while you get dances.
I've never asked the bartender, but always ask the waitress to get a dancer's attention for me, since the waitress is on the floor already. Just remember to tip the waitress for her assistance, but sometimes they get busy with their work and forget about your request. You do sometimes have to remind them and that's why I usually tip the waitress immediately when I ask her to get a certain dancer for me instead of tipping after the dancer comes over.
Now go and enjoy yourself. 8)
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Re: feel weird about going to club alone
I, along with most dancers on this forum and those I've known IRL, prefer customers who are alone. By far.
If you come into the club with money to spend and a fun attitude, chances are, almost any dancer (unless she's a wack-job) would be more than happy to dance for you.
And just for the record, my "opinion" of guys in groups is generally that they are cheaper and harder to deal with. They all have to "hold eachothers hand" and it becomes like pulling teeth to get dances. Notice how you said you spent 200 bucks while your friends spent 30 each? I'm guessing most of them turned down dances left and right correct?
THAT is why most girls prefer single guys.
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Re: feel weird about going to club alone
Aside from the times I have taken customers (which doesn't count) I'd rather go alone. Even if it is a really good friend it is kind of weird. I'd rather just be comfortable in the money that I plan to spend as opposed to worrying about the other guy.
FBR
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Re: feel weird about going to club alone
The first time I went to a SC by myself, I drove by the club like three times before I finally got up the courage to go inside. That was about 6 years ago after I got my divorce and have been going by myself ever since.
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Re: feel weird about going to club alone
Dancers prefer guys who are alone. The lonely guys tend to be the big spenders.
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Re: feel weird about going to club alone
Quote:
Originally Posted by
FBR
Aside from the times I have taken customers (which doesn't count) I'd rather go alone. Even if it is a really good friend it is kind of weird. I'd rather just be comfortable in the money that I plan to spend as opposed to worrying about the other guy.
FBR
This is part of why I find groups irritating sometimes. They all seem to be worried about what their friends will think if they spend too much/get "too many" dances/etc.
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Re: feel weird about going to club alone
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Originally Posted by
scarface03
Dancers prefer guys who are alone. The lonely guys tend to be the big spenders.
Let's not confuse the words "alone" and "lonely". They are two very different things and one does not imply the other.
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Re: feel weird about going to club alone
Quote:
Originally Posted by
bigmarv
The first time I went to a SC by myself, I drove by the club like three times before I finally got up the courage to go inside. That was about 6 years ago after I got my divorce and have been going by myself ever since.
I find this amusing. Guys who are there for their first time "alone" always bring it up to me. They say they feel like they "look weird" or whatever.
Likewise, sometimes guys who are part of a group will point at a guy who's alone and be like "oh, I could never do that" or "isn't that weird to you?" or "what's that guys story?" ......which BTW... most dancers really find annoying (when you ask about other customers).
The truth is, fellas, YOU GUYS, are the ones who think it's "weird". Meaning, other customers are probably the only ones who even give it any thought.
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Re: feel weird about going to club alone
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Originally Posted by
Pretty_Penny
I find this amusing. Guys who are there for their first time "alone" always bring it up to me. They say they feel like they "look weird" or whatever.
Likewise, sometimes guys who are part of a group will point at a guy who's alone and be like "oh, I could never do that" or "isn't that weird to you?" or "what's that guys story?" ......which BTW... most dancers really find annoying (when you ask about other customers).
The truth is, fellas, YOU GUYS, are the ones who think it's "weird". Meaning, other customers are probably the only ones who even give it any thought.
Yeah and it's strange that when I go to the club and I'm sitting with a dancer I'll ask, "which one of those guys in that group do you think is actually going to by a dance/drink for a dancer". She usually says, "probably none of them."
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Re: feel weird about going to club alone
My goodness....GUYS feel funny about going to a SC alone?
Bizarre.
I felt odd the first few times I went solo (but I'm a girl, so I'm allowed ;D). Nowadays I prefer going alone so that my attention is 100% on the girls, rather than on buddies that can go from "zero to stupid" in 3 drinks.
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Re: feel weird about going to club alone
Agree with all the girls. Alone is much better! I hate even talking to 2 guys and dancing for 3-4? yuck! Yep they allow that at my club. I really don't get why guys go together anyways unless it is a bachelor party or birthday or something. You need someone to hold your hand? I guess it's kinda like girls going to the bathroom together...
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Re: feel weird about going to club alone
I always go alone. Most men act like idiots inside a strip club when they are with other guys and many dancers avoid groups of guys.
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Re: feel weird about going to club alone
I don't care if a customer is there alone or with friends... as long as the money is coming out. The way I see it having a group of customers allows me to sell more dances quickly because I'm establishing rapport with all of them at once. However, guys that come in alone are often the ones who buy more dances. So it really just doesn't matter to me at all.
Now, on the dancers that you wanted dances from I would watch to see why they aren't out talking to customers. Are they going to the dressing room right after their stage set? Or are they going back to the private dance area? If they are hiding in the dressing room it probably means they are lazy or less social... and won't be able to entertain you as well. If they are busy giving dances that probably because they are very entertaining and good at their job, so ask one of the security guys to let her know you'd like a dance... and be sure to tip him!
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Re: feel weird about going to club alone
^hmmmm not sure I agree with the less social=not able to entertain as well. I know some girls who are very shy about approaching customers but still give amazing dances. I work with lots of girls who hardly speak english so really can't say much and the customers love it. I myself can be strongly affected by my mood. Some days I can't stand hustling and feel like I am more intelligent than every guy in there. So I try not to talk so much because when I dance...I always get into it. I immediately relax more and genuinely enjoy the dancing part of my job 99.9% of the time.
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Re: feel weird about going to club alone
I love men who are alone! Much easier to approach. Just dont be one of those guys who just sits at the bar all night! Also if you see a girl you like on stage, tip her and tell her you would love it if she joined you.
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Re: feel weird about going to club alone
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Jessie_tinydancer
^hmmmm not sure I agree with the less social=not able to entertain as well. I know some girls who are very shy about approaching customers but still give amazing dances. I work with lots of girls who hardly speak english so really can't say much and the customers love it. I myself can be strongly affected by my mood. Some days I can't stand hustling and feel like I am more intelligent than every guy in there. So I try not to talk so much because when I dance...I always get into it. I immediately relax more and genuinely enjoy the dancing part of my job 99.9% of the time.
Same with me. Sometimes I get anxiety attacks thinking about talking to people. The idea of small talk and then putting myself on display and then the possible rejection... oh the dread. But as soon as I get to dancing, it's a lot smoother. Hell, as soon as they say 'yes' to the dancing I get a lot more relaxed and comfortable.
Sometimes after my stage set I have to run back to the DR to stop my knees from shaking :-[
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Re: feel weird about going to club alone
It's a strip club, not a night club.
The girls know what you're there for, and care about how much money you're spending, not how attractive you are. Edit: Hygiene isn't the same as attractiveness, and is not optional. Shower. Shave. Wear clean clothes.
I sincerely doubt you'll ever hear the words "No, I won't take your money, you friendless unattractive person!" from a stripper.
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Re: feel weird about going to club alone
The way I see it we are being marketed as "Entertainers" these days... and part of the job (like it or not) is conversation.
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Re: feel weird about going to club alone
Most patrons go alone. It makes more sense to do so. Go often enough at consistent times and you may eventually make acquaintances with other customers.
Sounds to me like you're more interested in interacting with the girls anyway.