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The single gal thread ...... post dating mishaps and goals here ........
I'm newly single ( long term relationship of 6 years ended 2 months ago ). Who else is single right now? How are you doing ? The lack of physical affection ( cuddles ect.) is driving me crazy today and making me want to cry. The guy who sparked my interest hasn't asked me out after our little Sundance film fest make out session.
BUT ...... it's been a fun couple of months and I'm 99% sure I made the right choice to end it the relationship I was in despite the set backs.
I want to hear your single gal stories too since I'm back on that side of the fence so post some!
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Re: The single gal thread ...... post dating mishaps and goals here ........
I am in a limbo situation. I just started seeing someone I am crazy about (and have been for years) but we wants to take things slow because he got used a few years ago. I'm not used to that so it's weird and sometimes it upsets me. Other times I am glad so then it can be a quality relationship as compared to a fling. I know though if it doesn't work out I will be extremely devastated because for years I thought he was "the one". I know it's early, but it scares me.
I've been without male companionship for several years and it was awful. I could never meet quality guys. I'd chat with someone online only to find out he was married, only looking for sex, or a liar. I'd like a guy I met somewhere, and find out he wasn't interested. I'd see much younger relatives get married while I had a string of failed relationships. I'd cry myself to sleep wondering why I had such a rough time finding guys. I am pretty, I should have guys falling at my feet, but I don't. It's not like I have strict standards anymore, just guys without kids, who aren't obese and have jobs. Often when I do meet guys who fit these qualities they have issues. Even the guy I am dating has issues and not sure he can fix them (he has a mother who is pressuring him to marry and previous relationships where they used him).
If he doesn't work out (and I think it will if given time)I'm going to accept the fact that I'll probably be alone the rest of my life. Sounds terrible, but I can't go through another heartbreak. Some of the things I endured in my singles life were evil and would have driven others to suicide. Examples include a guy dumping me on Sweetest Day to date another girl and have a party at his party (of which I wasn't invited yet my enemies were), another guy dumping me on Valentines Day, another guy using money I sent him to visit me (he lived 4 hours away) to buy another girl a bracelet, many guys dumping me because I wouldn't have sex (and a few who dumped me because I did). Not to mention the con artists who only wanted me for money. Yep, if this doesn't work out I am completely done with dating.
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Re: The single gal thread ...... post dating mishaps and goals here ........
Used him for what exactly ? I'm not sure I understand his hesitation ..............
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Re: The single gal thread ...... post dating mishaps and goals here ........
Quote:
Originally Posted by
carmen_b
Used him for what exactly ? I'm not sure I understand his hesitation ..............
Money. He met a woman online and led him on to think she liked him but in reality she wanted money. Maybe in time he'll tell me more. He gets weird though with me because he's afraid. He's convinced I want him to get me pregnant so we'd marry (though I never even implied that). According to him he's been used often that he thinks women all want to use him for money.
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Re: The single gal thread ...... post dating mishaps and goals here ........
Does he have a ton of money? I mean ..... you are a dancer, so obviously, you have your own money. I don't see how this could be an issue since you don't need his money.
I really don't understand using men for money. You are putting yourself in a position of vulnerability that way. It's so much better just to make / have your OWN money.
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Re: The single gal thread ...... post dating mishaps and goals here ........
Quote:
Originally Posted by
carmen_b
Does he have a ton of money? I mean ..... you are a dancer, so obviously, you have yourown money. I don't see how this could be an issue since you don't need his money.
I really don't understand using men for money. You are putting yourself in a position of vulnerability that way. It's so much better just to make / have your OWN money.
No, he really doesn't have much money. I have some money saved from dancing (I am pretty much retired now) but he's so insecure. The pregnant one though really stunned me because I've never said that, nor are we even sleeping together. Not to say it won't happen eventually but can't now since I am currently doing freelance marketing until I find another full time job. I would never depend on a guy for money. I am more likely to be the bigger moneymaker anyway because of my education versus his.
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Re: The single gal thread ...... post dating mishaps and goals here ........
I don't know. That seem kind of odd right? I mean if he if making 100k + ......... then maybe he should worry ?
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Re: The single gal thread ...... post dating mishaps and goals here ........
I think his biggest fear is that I'll force him into a role he doesn't want to play now (fatherhood). In reality I don't want to play the role of mother now either. We can't afford it, nor is it the time in the relationship. He does like kids, but I think it's part of his mother pressuring him to get married and have kids. I'm thinking his mother likely told him that we need to have babies soon because I am 39 and he is 42. As a result he keeps insisting he never wants to marry nor have kids, but I know it's because of the pressure.
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Re: The single gal thread ...... post dating mishaps and goals here ........
^ I see. Well ......I can relate. I don't want kids and I fear my biological clock isn't ticking period. I'm 30. I want to WANT kids ........ but right now the thought terrifies me.
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Re: The single gal thread ...... post dating mishaps and goals here ........
Until a few years ago I was sure I never wanted kids. Now I am open to the idea of kids with the right guy. He might be the right guy eventually but certainly not now. He seems to think I want them now and I want to marry him. It's bizarre since I'm only interested in dating now. Maybe in 6 months to a year it'll be different.
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Re: The single gal thread ...... post dating mishaps and goals here ........
Quote:
Originally Posted by
carmen_b
I'm newly single ( long term relationship of 6 years ended 2 months ago ). Who else is single right now? How are you doing ? The lack of physical affection ( cuddles ect.) is driving me crazy today and making me want to cry. The guy who sparked my interest hasn't asked me out after our little Sundance film fest make out session.
BUT ...... it's been a fun couple of months and I'm 99% sure I made the right choice to end it the relationship I was in despite the set backs.
I want to hear your single gal stories too since I'm back on that side of the fence so post some!
I can really relate.. I am really missing physical touch and intimacy... I feel so lonely! I've been single since I ended my last relationship of a year, about a year ago. Mainly just been hooking up here and there but I haven't been with anyone or even on a date all winter.
I'm pretty introverted and don't have many girl friends to go out with so it's hard putting myself out there.. I'd love to go out on a date and meet new people, but I just need the courage I guess.
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Re: The single gal thread ...... post dating mishaps and goals here ........
Yeah. I need action. My room mate ( who I THOUGHT was gay ... he talks like he's gay ) has been discretly hitting on me ( telling me I look nice and smell good ) and made a big move tonight be touching my legs on the couch during a movie. I went to bed to hide from him, but I was this close to just hooking up with him. Besides ...... I kind of like my taller room mate ( they have both only been here a couple of weeks ) and so it would be stupid to hook up with the other one.
The only times I've been able to hook up casually is on business trips when the guy is outside my home area. I can't pull it off with anyone local.
I think my problem is that I take the whole thing way too seriously. Someone doesn't like me ( or maybe they do ....... but they don't express it with dates like I think they should ) and boo-hoo ....... I'm upset for weeks. I've got to just quit that.
I'm seriously considering a sugar daddy or a friend with benefits. I'm just lonely as hell. I can not do this anymore.
Jade: A wing woman may help you. I need to find one too.
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Re: The single gal thread ...... post dating mishaps and goals here ........
i need to get back into the dating scene...i've been single since October and the guy i was with for over a year was impotent. But i have to say...the sex dreams i have are amazing!!
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Re: The single gal thread ...... post dating mishaps and goals here ........
^ I'm assuming he took care of you though sexually in other ways ?
Oh ..... I don't have sex dreams that often, but I remember some. In one I was dancing with other strippers on a trampoline ( we were just jumping really ) . Eventually the club closed ( you know ... the club with a trampoline inside! ) and I fucked one of the customers out back. It was a most awesome sex dream I have to say ( I would never to that in real life, don't worry ) .
Oh .... I think the guy I was in love with *might* have be impotent. He was am amazing kisser and was awesome to make out with ( he's touch my WHOLE body ect. ) We only dated 5 months or so and someone pointed out that maybe he was taking it slow because you know ......... he couldn't get it up possibly.
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Re: The single gal thread ...... post dating mishaps and goals here ........
Happy Discount Chocolate Day's Eve to all you single gals out there.
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Re: The single gal thread ...... post dating mishaps and goals here ........
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Re: The single gal thread ...... post dating mishaps and goals here ........
LOL That's what I'm looking forward to tomorrow. Target in the a.m., then to the department stores to buy some gourmet chocolate half off. Sometimes Target is sneaky and will only price stuff 30% off then wait a while to go down to 50/75% off. So we'll see.
I'm single also, had a few prospects, but I got bored with them. Always whining about work and the economy, I know it sucks but STFU! You have a home, car, job etc. I've been ignoring them but there are 2 that can't seem to get the hint. I'll be changing my phone number in a few weeks.
ETA: I met someone recently, very sweet and attentive but there are some factors in place that places him in the temporary fling catergory. Oh well.
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Re: The single gal thread ...... post dating mishaps and goals here ........
Quote:
Originally Posted by
carmen_b
I think I want a friend with benefits. I have NEVER considered this situation before ( in fact .... I'd feel insulted if anyone even insinuated being interested in one with me ).
It just sort of fucked up to tell people for 27 hours straight ( 9 hour dancing shifts over last 3 days ) that no .... you can't go out with them ...... you can't go home with them ........ you can't marry them ect. and then just sit online on a Sat. night and waste a rare weekend night free from work!
I'm tall, blonde, thin ( somewhat of a rarity in my home area for the gals ) , have no kids ( also a rarity for my home area and age ). This should not be happening.
LOL I feel that way also...I'm like why the heck am I at home when I should be out having fun and drinking on someone else's dime!::)/:O;D When people hit on me in the street I try to run away from them as fast as I can, i guess that is where I am screwing up. Come spring time I will begin to exchange some phone numbers.
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Re: The single gal thread ...... post dating mishaps and goals here ........
Um ......
lots of liquor+
texas hold em+
confessing Valentines lonliness to male roomate
= Bad.
Oops.
Not a huge deal. Just cuddles. I had the self control to not let kissing happen ( cause if he would have turned out to be a good kisser, everything would have happened).
I had to get out of the house today though. He's behaving very respectfully and cool. But ...... I kind of wanted the taller one. I thought D was gay at first ( he kind of talks like he's gay). Apparently ..... very far from gay. Apparently ...... he's wanted to make a move for awhile. Shit. I do LIKE forwardness though.
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Re: The single gal thread ...... post dating mishaps and goals here ........
^^ How is that bad? I've slept in the same bed as my boyfriend's best friend- J and I fell asleep on the couch, I fell off and went into the bed.
The funny part is I ended up, in my sleep, putting my arms around him and kissing his shoulders ( which I do to J ). I was embarrassed when it happened, but J found it hilarious and we laugh about it now. So just laugh about it. Cuddling up with a friend isn't a big deal.
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Re: The single gal thread ...... post dating mishaps and goals here ........
Well ..... ok ........ it started on the couch . I announced I was going to bed alone and he went and took a shower and came into my room in his undies. There was a very sexy element 'cause it was all skin to skin and lots of touches. He laid down by me and my bed is huge and heated with an electric blanket. I felt bad leaving him on the cold top, so I was like " oh .... fine .... just get in ". It was actually hot and he's got a really cuddly build. The whole routine was him telling me how awesome I am, me eating it up and getting touched and cuddled, and then me going " Yeah .... nothing is happening here ..... see we aren't kissing. " . This all made sense drunk. I am responsible because I did leave the door cracked instead of my usual close+lock routine.
Why does he sometimes talk like his is gay ? He just has a gay intonation to his voice and it's so STRANGE. Then .... sometimes he's talk perfectly normal. Weird.
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Re: The single gal thread ...... post dating mishaps and goals here ........
^^ You have more restraint than I. I would have fucked him and not thought twice about it.
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Re: The single gal thread ...... post dating mishaps and goals here ........
Well ....... I sort of still have a crush on the taller roomate. I didn't see any long term potential in D ........ but now I am admiring his forwarness and how cool he is being , so I don't know. The tall engineer/guitar player didn't make a move, so you snooze you lose I guess.
Also ..... he's still married. Divorce is not final ..... his ex is actually a former client at my day job - talk about weird and random.
He just called and wants to know If I'm coming home. He wanted to check to see if he should wait to start the red box movie he picked up.
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Re: The single gal thread ...... post dating mishaps and goals here ........
Why are you seeking out only long term? I say play the field and have fun. I played the field for a year and it was fantastic.
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Re: The single gal thread ...... post dating mishaps and goals here ........
I also heard from R ( the guy that went to Sundance film fest stuff with me ). I'll post his note in a bit. I think I'd be happy to see him again even though he didn't follow up with calls / invites out / ect. like I expected. I just don't want these guys to only see me as a play toy. It's the blonde hair. I swear the hair sometimes throws me into " casual fun " land all the time. But it's fine now. I think I'm enjoying this.