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Falling in love with a client... I know I'm such a hyprocrit!
I honestly don't know where the hell to start.. but here goes (An extremely short version):
I started seeing him last month.. I saw him twice and each time I saw him he'd pay $800 (2 hours). He's white, much older (late 30s), makes over 175k a year and SUPER FRIKKIN HOT (no exaggeration here girls he's beautiful). So beautiful that I had to ask him out... I know I know I couldn't help myself. Well, We're dating now and I feel like I've crossed the line.. Do I care that I lose HIM as a client? No! I just feel like such a hypocrit now that I'm actually falling for this guy and I've said many times DO NOT FALL IN LOVE WITH YOUR CLIENT ...I just had to come on and admit it!
We've been out 3 times so far . Our first date was to the Cheesecake factory, Second date to Bentleys on 27th (google it it's heaven), 3rd date, We hung out by the lake each and every time he wouldn't even talk about sex! He paid for everything of course and yesterday he took me to a jazz concert.. I don't even listen to jazz but I LOVED IT!! The marriage subject came up today ;D and he was telling me how he wouldn't make me quit escorting If I didn't want to but he's willing to help me get a non adult business started and I'm like "OMG really sure!!" LOL! I'm such a dork! We were supposed to do dinner tonight with his friends but I didn't feel comfortable meeting them just yet (a married couple) so I opted out.. Ok .. Yell at me.. I know i know horrible huh? What are yall thinking?
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Re: Falling in love with a client... I know I'm such a hyprocrit!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
malayataylor
I honestly don't know where the hell to start.. but here goes (An extremely short version):
I started seeing him last month.. I saw him twice and each time I saw him he'd pay $800 (2 hours). He's white, much older (late 30s), makes over 175k a year and SUPER FRIKKIN HOT (no exaggeration here girls he's beautiful). So beautiful that I had to ask him out... I know I know I couldn't help myself. Well, We're dating now and I feel like I've crossed the line.. Do I care that I lose HIM as a client? No! I just feel like such a hypocrit now that I'm actually falling for this guy and I've said many times DO NOT FALL IN LOVE WITH YOUR CLIENT ...I just had to come on and admit it!
We've been out 3 times so far . Our first date was to the Cheesecake factory, Second date to Bentleys on 27th (google it it's heaven), 3rd date, We hung out by the lake each and every time he wouldn't even talk about sex! He paid for everything of course and yesterday he took me to a jazz concert.. I don't even listen to jazz but I LOVED IT!! The marriage subject came up today ;D and he was telling me how he wouldn't make me quit escorting If I didn't want to but he's willing to help me get a non adult business started and I'm like "OMG really sure!!" LOL! I'm such a dork! We were supposed to do dinner tonight with his friends but I didn't feel comfortable meeting them just yet (a married couple) so I opted out.. Ok .. Yell at me.. I know i know horrible huh? What are yall thinking?
he sounds hott! i say go for it girlie!
p.s. i like older white guys too :)
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Re: Falling in love with a client... I know I'm such a hyprocrit!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
malayataylor
...The marriage subject came up today ;D and he was telling me how he wouldn't make me quit escorting If I didn't want to but he's willing to help me get a non adult business started and I'm like "OMG really sure!!" LOL! I'm such a dork! We were supposed to do dinner tonight with his friends but I didn't feel comfortable meeting them just yet (a married couple) so I opted out.. Ok .. Yell at me.. I know i know horrible huh? What are yall thinking?
Sorry, I am a skeptic. I think if you marry him he will wind up not wanting you to escort at all.
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Re: Falling in love with a client... I know I'm such a hyprocrit!
I think you're making me miss my millionaire ex boyfriend. Le sigh.
Go for it Malaya. You deserve it.
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Re: Falling in love with a client... I know I'm such a hyprocrit!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
AngelCummings
he sounds hott! i say go for it girlie!
p.s. i like older white guys too :)
Thanks girl! They're yummy huh?! ;D
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Originally Posted by
Djoser
Sorry, I am a skeptic. I think if you marry him he will wind up not wanting you to escort at all.
He said he wouldn't mind. He was like "Well I wouldn't mind as long as I can hide in the closet and watch every once in a while" LMFAO! He said he was joking but I'm pretty sure he wasn't lol! He has enough money to take care of my fam and his fam combined. If it became an issue and I had to quit I would.. there's always camming! He DID say he'd help me get a non adult business started which is awesome! I wouldn't mind that.
Quote:
Originally Posted by
mediocrity
I think you're making me miss my millionaire ex boyfriend. Le sigh.
Go for it Malaya. You deserve it.
Thanks girl! I'm excited!! :)
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Re: Falling in love with a client... I know I'm such a hyprocrit!
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Re: Falling in love with a client... I know I'm such a hyprocrit!
honestly, i think that u end up meeting "the one" when least expected and sometimes in the strangest circumstances. I sure did. Cant help who ya fall for... Just made me think of Pretty Women.. LOL.. well hey you never know!! GO FOR IT!!!
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Re: Falling in love with a client... I know I'm such a hyprocrit!
I love how you think late 30's is "much older". LOL
One word ... Prenup!
I'd get a REALLY good one.
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Re: Falling in love with a client... I know I'm such a hyprocrit!
He's already talking about marriage after only the 3rd date or the 5th date including the paid sessions? and he is what Ricchard Gere? And for the last 30
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Re: Falling in love with a client... I know I'm such a hyprocrit!
(continued) - last 15 yrs he's been doing what? The story sounds a bit fishy, or maybe you are misreading him.
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Re: Falling in love with a client... I know I'm such a hyprocrit!
^^ You don't even want to know how long I knew my ex husband before I met him. And we only divorced over conflict in the babies department.
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Re: Falling in love with a client... I know I'm such a hyprocrit!
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Originally Posted by
Kylea2
I love how you think late 30's is "much older". LOL
One word ... Prenup!
I'd get a REALLY good one.
Late 30s is NOT old at all. He's much older than I am. That's what I meant kylea! No offense to anyone!
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Originally Posted by
WestCoast101
He's already talking about marriage after only the 3rd date or the 5th date including the paid sessions? and he is what Ricchard Gere? And for the last 30
Quote:
Originally Posted by
WestCoast101
(continued) - last 15 yrs he's been doing what? The story sounds a bit fishy, or maybe you are misreading him.
Sounds fishy? I've only stated facts. this is what have happened so far. Lol @ misreading him.. No no real deal sweetie!!;D Westcoast, quit hating for once.. Damn!
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Originally Posted by
mediocrity
^^ You don't even want to know how long I knew my ex husband before I met him. And we only divorced over conflict in the babies department.
WOW.. :(
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I'll write after we have dinner tommorrow! :)
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Re: Falling in love with a client... I know I'm such a hyprocrit!
I say enjoy this and him and your time together and all the lovely things that come with it.. You deserve to have amazing experiences and love in your life, who knows where it will go, but just be in the present and enjoy :)
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Re: Falling in love with a client... I know I'm such a hyprocrit!
I second the pre-nup! and congrats babe! He sounds amazing. Just be careful and do what your heart tells you to do. :)
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Kylea2
I love how you think late 30's is "much older". LOL
One word ... Prenup!
I'd get a REALLY good one.
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Re: Falling in love with a client... I know I'm such a hyprocrit!
please, yall should know malaya is smart, she wont mess up
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Re: Falling in love with a client... I know I'm such a hyprocrit!
I know she's smart, and my friend the DJ who worked with her also told me she's smoking hot, so I know she can attract a good man.
I am just skeptical. If it sounds too good to be true, it usually is. I hope I'm wrong.
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Re: Falling in love with a client... I know I'm such a hyprocrit!
hmmm ya Im a skeptic too... I guess just tread carefully. I am a bit surprised cause I was always under the impression that you were looking for someone who was making a hell of a lot more than $175K because you wanted to be taken care of... and I hate to be a I-told-you-so biatch but I do remember you saying that you can help who you fall in love with... Um no you can't. :) LOL
But please please be careful. Love is blind. It's a little scary. But is also amazing... so when it comes down to it I really can't hate... YAY!
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Re: Falling in love with a client... I know I'm such a hyprocrit!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Jessie_tinydancer
hmmm ya Im a skeptic too... I guess just tread carefully. I am a bit surprised cause I was always under the impression that you were looking for someone who was making a hell of a lot more than $175K because you wanted to be taken care of... and I hate to be a I-told-you-so biatch but I do remember you saying that you can help who you fall in love with... Um no you can't. :) LOL
But please please be careful. Love is blind. It's a little scary. But is also amazing... so when it comes down to it I really can't hate... YAY!
Lol! Please go back to the post you're referring to and READ again. You stated that you were married and had a sugardaddy and I didn't agree. I never threw any numbers out there as to what I thought my future husband should make. Sure, There's nothing wrong with a two income home but I'd hate to rely on another man for money while I'm married.
Hold that thought...
For those ignorant people out there, 1.) escorting is escorting. Escorting and sugarbaby/sugardaddy relationships do not go hand in hand.. Escorting is STRICTLY business. There is no negotiation. The client knows what he's getting before he even calls you. You don't sit around and make arragements it's more I'm here, I'm gone type deal. So all this is really strange to me I never thought that I'd ask one of my CLIENTS out.
2.) Clients are NOT sugardaddies or boyfriends... they're your customers. Sugardaddies are not customers! Please do not mix the two!
So I don't know what you're talking about. So yes, Again since you bring it up, If my future husband wanted me to quit escorting and find something else? sure but don't tell me to quit my job when you can't take care of me this is all I'm saying. OVER 175k a year is not what I'd call peanuts. Now If I'm working as an escort/dancer/camgirl whatever and my husband is working AND I'm STILL relying on some sugardaddy to give me x amount of money a month.. something's wrong. Sorry You don't feel the same way but that's how I feel and I'm sticking to it.
Your I-told-you-so dosen't apply here :)
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This guy's AWESOME! Maybe "falling in love" is a lil exaggeration on my part but I like him! He didn't propose to me .. the marriage subject just came up.
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Re: Falling in love with a client... I know I'm such a hyprocrit!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
mediocrity
I think you're making me miss my millionaire ex boyfriend. Le sigh.
Go for it Malaya. You deserve it.
I agree. And yeah, I miss mine too... they are amazing. It's a whole new game.
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Re: Falling in love with a client... I know I'm such a hyprocrit!
^^^ thank you! I knew in your first post he didnt propose yall were just talking..
And I agree if I were to get married, no way that I would rely on a sugar daddy!
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Re: Falling in love with a client... I know I'm such a hyprocrit!
Thanks girls!! :) I'll definetely let you all know how it goes today :)
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Re: Falling in love with a client... I know I'm such a hyprocrit!
Ahem, I fully expect to find a picture of "the rock" if he pops the question in my inbox, girl.
Personally, I'm happy for you. It doesn't happen OFTEN in this business, but it DOES happen. I've known at least 3 girls I've worked with who have ended up marrying clients. The only thing I would worry about is if he becomes an "ex-hobbyist" when he gets married, but I think I would prefer my man visiting an escort as opposed to flat-out cheating on me with some random barskank.
I hope all goes well for you today though! Let me know how it goes!!!!
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Re: Falling in love with a client... I know I'm such a hyprocrit!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
malayataylor
Lol! Please go back to the post you're referring to and READ again. You stated that you were married and had a sugardaddy and I didn't agree. I never threw any numbers out there as to what I thought my future husband should make. Sure, There's nothing wrong with a two income home but I'd hate to rely on another man for money while I'm married.
Hold that thought...
For those ignorant people out there, 1.) escorting is escorting. Escorting and sugarbaby/sugardaddy relationships do not go hand in hand.. Escorting is STRICTLY business. There is no negotiation. The client knows what he's getting before he even calls you. You don't sit around and make arragements it's more I'm here, I'm gone type deal. So all this is really strange to me I never thought that I'd ask one of my CLIENTS out.
2.) Clients are NOT sugardaddies or boyfriends... they're your customers. Sugardaddies are not customers! Please do not mix the two!
So I don't know what you're talking about. So yes, Again since you bring it up, If my future husband wanted me to quit escorting and find something else? sure but don't tell me to quit my job when you can't take care of me this is all I'm saying. OVER 175k a year is not what I'd call peanuts. Now If I'm working as an escort/dancer/camgirl whatever and my husband is working AND I'm STILL relying on some sugardaddy to give me x amount of money a month.. something's wrong. Sorry You don't feel the same way but that's how I feel and I'm sticking to it.
Your I-told-you-so dosen't apply here :)
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This guy's AWESOME! Maybe "falling in love" is a lil exaggeration on my part but I like him! He didn't propose to me .. the marriage subject just came up.
UMmmm please go back and read what I wrote too. I do not have a sugar daddy. I advised the OP to ask her partner if she wanted a SD and said my husband wouldn't care as long as I didn't sleep with one. Never once did I say I had one. I don't have one... the I told you so was for saying you choose who you fall in love with... so u chose to fall in love with a custie??? Doesn't sound like it.
Please read what I wrote...
My quote:
Unfortunately you have to tell a significant other if you plan on having a sugar daddy. Otherwise it would seem like cheating even if there is no sex involved. I've never had one but I don't think my husband would mind as long as it didn't take too much time away from him. If it meant I could work less and therefore have more time with him then he'd probably be ok with it. I might ask him and get back to you! hehehe. I should anyways because I do have a potential on the horizon.
And then I later said this:
I know this is off the original topic...
I just wanna say, unfortunately you cannot choose who you fall in love with. Obviously you are not going to be attracted to some bum, but are you saying you wouldn't marry someone who makes $50K-$150K? Because my husband makes $80K and probably only has the potential to make $150K at the peak of his career. To me that is not enough money to support 2 people in the lifestyle I'm accustomed to. He is a freaking awesome man. I cannot imagine being married to anyone else. We are so perfect for each other it is ridiculous. So he's not a millionaire, but I would still consider him "successful". He has a university degree and is very hard working. He also does not take my money. My dancing money is mine. Of course I contribute to the household expenses and purchases.
I guess I just get confused when I hear a dancer saying, "I don't want a man leaching off of me", but then expect that later in life someone else is going to take care of them. Even if you plan on setting yourself up before you get married (again you don't choose when you fall in love and decide anyway, life is full of the unexpected), are we talking about saving millions here so that your husband is not going to the office, hospital (doc), court (lawyer) everyday busting his ass so that you can have everything you want? I mean I easily spend $100K per year without kids. I suspect some men would have a similar resentment over time as dancers do when being the sole provider for the family.
PS- I do hope you find a kick ass, sweet, intelligent, faithful, rich guy because that's what you girls deserve. I'm just saying you might meet and fall in love with a kick ass, sweet, intelligent, faithful teacher or nurse for example who makes only $50K. Are you really going to pass him by?
To which you replied:
Well .. First of all, Who says you can't choose? Control your destiny or someone else will. My mom for example lived in the U.S for 13 years, Had a boutique in greenville, sc and hired someone to basically run it... never worked a day in her life moved to nigeria and sitting in a mansion with 4 kids (my siblings) she has to take care of. Who said you can't choose? bullshit. Is my father a millionaire? He used to be ..his glory days are long gone but he has very successful hotels in Nigeria/Kenya. "Do you have to work malaya?" No they send money when I ask but I don't want to ask my parents for money and I love being in the adult industry camming/escorting .. whatever. As weird as it may sound, I'd love to marry a man like my father.. He's the most AMAZING man in this whole world. Sorry I feel girls sell themselves short thinking they can't do better when they really can.. Sorry for the major threadjack but had to get this out.
LOL @ Men having resetment where tha hell are you finding these men that have resentments? A man is the head of the household that is what he's supposed to do (provide for his family and more) .. maybe i'm a little 1950s but My mama taught me not to settle for less.
You are right. You never mentioned numbers. But you implied you needed a millionaire and that you have control over who you love and don't love. As someone who chooses partners and friends for who they are not how much money they make, at the time I thought it extremely uncool. I understood after reading about your background, but am now surprised because I thought like me, you though $150K was not much money.
http://forum.stripperweb.com/showthread.php?t=114477
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Re: Falling in love with a client... I know I'm such a hyprocrit!
Hmm.. Ok ... here goes:
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Jessie_tinydancer
UMmmm please go back and read what I wrote too. I do not have a sugar daddy. I advised the OP to ask her partner if she wanted a SD and said my husband wouldn't care as long as I didn't sleep with one. Never once did I say I had one. I don't have one... the I told you so was for saying you choose who you fall in love with... so u chose to fall in love with a custie??? Doesn't sound like it.
Again, Go back and read what I just wrote.. I DID say "falling in love" was a little exaggeration on my part. So you don't have a sugardaddy .. you were giving such advice to someone in a committed relationshipp. Yes You can CHOOSE, I am not in love with the guy. I just went on 3 dates with him and you're making a big deal about it. Do I REALLY like him? Yeah! All I did was write about it and you're telling me "I told you so" You didn't tell me anything because I've said countless times never fall in love with a client even before that other thread so don't think you are telling me something I don't already know.
Quote:
Please read what I wrote...
My quote:
Unfortunately you have to tell a significant other if you plan on having a sugar daddy. Otherwise it would seem like cheating even if there is no sex involved. I've never had one but I don't think my husband would mind as long as it didn't take too much time away from him. If it meant I could work less and therefore have more time with him then he'd probably be ok with it. I might ask him and get back to you! hehehe. I should anyways because I do have a potential on the horizon.
And then I later said this:
I know this is off the original topic...
I just wanna say, unfortunately you cannot choose who you fall in love with. Obviously you are not going to be attracted to some bum, but are you saying you wouldn't marry someone who makes $50K-$150K? Because my husband makes $80K and probably only has the potential to make $150K at the peak of his career. To me that is not enough money to support 2 people in the lifestyle I'm accustomed to. He is a freaking awesome man. I cannot imagine being married to anyone else. We are so perfect for each other it is ridiculous. So he's not a millionaire, but I would still consider him "successful". He has a university degree and is very hard working. He also does not take my money. My dancing money is mine. Of course I contribute to the household expenses and purchases.
I guess I just get confused when I hear a dancer saying, "I don't want a man leaching off of me", but then expect that later in life someone else is going to take care of them. Even if you plan on setting yourself up before you get married (again you don't choose when you fall in love and decide anyway, life is full of the unexpected), are we talking about saving millions here so that your husband is not going to the office, hospital (doc), court (lawyer) everyday busting his ass so that you can have everything you want? I mean I easily spend $100K per year without kids. I suspect some men would have a similar resentment over time as dancers do when being the sole provider for the family.
PS- I do hope you find a kick ass, sweet, intelligent, faithful, rich guy because that's what you girls deserve. I'm just saying you might meet and fall in love with a kick ass, sweet, intelligent, faithful teacher or nurse for example who makes only $50K. Are you really going to pass him by?
Lol.. Ok so your hubby makes 80k a year but your spend 100k a year on your kids alone... hmmm.. OK! nuff said.
Quote:
To which you replied:
Well .. First of all, Who says you can't choose? Control your destiny or someone else will. My mom for example lived in the U.S for 13 years, Had a boutique in greenville, sc and hired someone to basically run it... never worked a day in her life moved to nigeria and sitting in a mansion with 4 kids (my siblings) she has to take care of. Who said you can't choose? bullshit. Is my father a millionaire? He used to be ..his glory days are long gone but he has very successful hotels in Nigeria/Kenya. "Do you have to work malaya?" No they send money when I ask but I don't want to ask my parents for money and I love being in the adult industry camming/escorting .. whatever. As weird as it may sound, I'd love to marry a man like my father.. He's the most AMAZING man in this whole world. Sorry I feel girls sell themselves short thinking they can't do better when they really can.. Sorry for the major threadjack but had to get this out.
LOL @ Men having resetment where tha hell are you finding these men that have resentments? A man is the head of the household that is what he's supposed to do (provide for his family and more) .. maybe i'm a little 1950s but My mama taught me not to settle for less.
Yep, I don't see anything wrong with what I wrote. You simply ASSumed! and what happens when you assume eh? A man IS the head of a household.. he is supposed to be the breadwinner of the family.. YES that was how I was brought up! If my hubby was making 175K a year or more and I'm making 30.. even 40k a year.. UMM... that's money.
Quote:
You are right. You never mentioned numbers. But you implied you needed a millionaire and that you have control over who you love and don't love. As someone who chooses partners and friends for who they are not how much money they make, at the time I thought it extremely uncool. I understood after reading about your background, but am now surprised because I thought like me, you though $150K was not much money.
Yeah I'm glad you see that I never mentioned numbers. You simply ASSUMED! I didn't imply shit.. You just thought that was what I wanted. I want a man that's able to take care of me and my daughter.. my family? Why is it that he has to be a millionaire.. I know a lot of men that do that and they are NOT millionaires. LOL @ You are now surprised because you thought I thought 150k was not much money.. Honey, You're the one spending 100k a year on your kids.. I NEVER made such claims.. so please quit assuming! Your hubby makes 80k a year and you're talking about someone that makes OVER 175k a year.. Your hubby is not seeing 150k yet and you're telling me that 150k is no money. Rubbish.
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Re: Falling in love with a client... I know I'm such a hyprocrit!
Malaya, one of my BEST friends of five years was an escort and a dancer, we worked together at The Lodge in Dallas. She is now going into medical school up in D.C., just completed her Masters Degree in Microbiology, and is engaged to one of her former escorting clients! They have been together for about 3 1/2 years now, and live together up in D.C. At first I thought it was strange that she was dating a guy she met from escorting, but hey, they are VERY happy together, so it can and has been done!
Now with that being said, I think it is going to be hard to stay in the adult industry and be in a relationship with this guy. I say this based on my personal past experiences. Just ask yourself this question, and think really hard about it.... Do you want to be with a guy that is okay with you being an escort? Anyways, good luck with everything, hope it works out for you! It's difficult to find quality guys now a days.