-
older dancer trying to prolong career
I've never been a super hustler and been a bit of a mum next door type, but I've always done nicely. I've looked at other jobs, but with 2 kids with problems and studying part time I need the flexibility that no other job offers (and the potential of good earnings). The body- especially feet and knees are starting to struggle too.
Over the last year the club I'm in has changed and the hustle has gone up a notch or ten, largely because the money overall has gone down and the number of dancers has tripled. We have a lot of French girls right now who have their hand under the customers shirts and nibbling ears as they introduce themselves. In the last 2 months they have started to add tongue kissing to get the guys out for a dance.
I am too old to get into another club, I asked management about going behind the bar but they said "no" they don't want ex dancers doing bar work. At the moment I'm just wandering about feeling hideously old and ugly and being amazed that I'm still managing to go home with more than minimum wage when I've become too self conscious to be approaching customers. (I need a confidence boost too).
There's no point trying to pretend I'm 20 something when I'm obviously not and I'm too old fashioned to be tongue kissing strangers within 60 seconds of meeting them (and too prone to germs). Does anyone have any tips that I can glam myself up and use my older looks and style to an advantage?
The other thing that's probably important about my loss of mojo at work is that my oldest daughter ran away from home and had a baby. Even though it's not unusual for a woman to still be stripping at 43. The picture in the mind of a stripping grandma is not good.. Sadly that's what I am now a stripper grandma!
-
Re: older dancer trying to prolong career
Maybe I should have just had a moan and posted a whiney sook fest on one of the other forums instead of trying to get off my bum and help myself to improve... (sad face)
-
Re: older dancer trying to prolong career
I'd stay on at the club as long as you can. I've met a few dancers in their 50's & 60's, so don't be too worried. Have you thought about adding in private dancing?
-
Re: older dancer trying to prolong career
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Kylea2
I'd stay on at the club as long as you can. I've met a few dancers in their 50's & 60's, so don't be too worried. Have you thought about adding in private dancing?
Wow! You've actually known women who've danced in their 60's???! That is amazing. I'm 42 now (but look 25) and thinking about dancing but I'm self-conscious and lack confidence to actually go out on the stage and perform infront of strangers.
Part of me really wants to do this...but the other part of me is SCARED AS HELL!!!! Do you have any suggestions?
thanks in advance
-
Re: older dancer trying to prolong career
MILF's and Cougars are mainstream ... rejoice and embrace your womanly sexuality! Many men are not into the young ditzy stripper ... they want a WOMAN who is not only sexy but intelligent and confident w/in her own skin. Confidence is extremely sexy! ;D
-
Re: older dancer trying to prolong career
Quote:
Originally Posted by
deedee at the beach
Wow! You've actually known women who've danced in their 60's???! That is amazing. I'm 42 now (but look 25) and thinking about dancing but I'm self-conscious and lack confidence to actually go out on the stage and perform infront of strangers.
Part of me really wants to do this...but the other part of me is SCARED AS HELL!!!! Do you have any suggestions?
thanks in advance
I've met a number of them locally, and even more since I've been traveling.
I don't really know what to tell you other than just go out there and do it. I was sooooo shy before I started dancing. Unless I knew you, I wouldn't talk to you. I mean shy enough that I literally couldn't even order food at a fast food place as a child, even when my parents offered to pay me. I come from a background in ballet and it seems like dancers are always taught to be quiet and well disciplined. Anyhow, I figure if I can do this... any woman can do this.
-
Re: older dancer trying to prolong career
I met a stripper in her 60s when I first started and she looked better than some of the 20 something strippers I've seen.
She didn't look really young or like she had a bunch of surgery but the woman had class and it showed. She seemed to do pretty well by presenting herself as a mature dancer. She wore long gowns and gloves and it made her stand out when all the younger dancers were wearing little two piece sets.
-
Re: older dancer trying to prolong career
Oh wow. The stories of strippers in their 50 and 60's is making me feel much better. I know it's ll in my head. I still manage to do Ok in light of the full on hustling going on and my own hustling having dropped to almost zero.
I'm thinking if I go for the 60's look since I'm a 60's baby I can wear go-go boots which will save my feet a bit. Maybe I can work on a line along the lines "the girls her are cute but let me show you how a real woman does it".
Fantastic. I'm inspired already!
-
Re: older dancer trying to prolong career
^I was going to suggest that line. I have heard some of the older dancers use it. I've personally always looked up to the older dancers. A lot of the time they have a lot more confidence than the younger ones and know exactly what to say to get that money out of the guys' wallets. I say just fake it! Don't worry too much about the skanky girls... they fuck it over for all of us, young and old. I agree with the dress thing too... 60's look is a good idea, anything glamorous, elegant. Keep the make up simple. I personally do not think 42 is old at all. I am 28 and bi-sexual and one of my playmates is 41 and she is beautiful. She's not a dancer but her bedroom style is generally either french lingerie or dominatrix type stuff.
-
Re: older dancer trying to prolong career
I wouldn't see myself at 42 needing to quit cuz of age, but that's me now in my early 30's talking cuz if anything I imagine myself to age better then most as i always seem to believe I have improved with age that and I'm willing to suffer for it so if anything I'll go under the knife if I need.
However how old is to old to strip varies in my opinion from dancer to dancer as I have seen girls in their twenties who were the hotness till they hit 26 and then the years or drug abuse/smoking/drinking/having children/general aging kick them in the ass where they just look worn out and would make washed up dancers alot sooner then they should while a classic beauty like my mother who aged gracefully still gets hit on by my friends and gets mistaken for my sister. Not that my mom ever stripped, but had she considered it as her career she would have banked and even now she could make a decent living as men just love her and she is and will always be a beautiful woman.
Average women however I would say should expect that dancing is not a life term career possibility as the retiring age among dancers is young and it can become harder for many as they age unless they have a strong regular base. Not to say i haven't seen some that do more then well for themselves, but they are more the exception then the standard.
I would say to be the exceptional older dancer stick with natural classic beauty sell yourself on experienced older woman charm. I would recommend what has been as far as elegant gowns, but stress the importance for you to wear lots of moisturizer all over. Seriously the only much older lover I had who was in her 40s when I was only 20 used to bathe in it(applying it all over nightly) and it paid off for her as she had better softer skin then many my age which w/ soo impressive to me beyond the fact she had a beautiful body and timeless beauty/class. She was beautiful danced in Canada and a woman that was that milf cougar everyone swooned after.
-
Re: older dancer trying to prolong career
Hi,
I am also 43 and have no plans of slowing down or quitting! I enjoy the freedom and the money dancing provides.
I agree with what you say about the hustle factor out there today, but just ignore it and do your thing. I think it is worse for the younger girls, there is so much competition between them. Being older you stand out without doing anything but being there.
I have made about the same money every day throughout my career, and I don't think age has a thing to do with it. Don't try to act or dress young, act age appropriate, and you will be fine.
Good Luck!
-
Re: older dancer trying to prolong career
If this is the job you want to be doing, coming to peace with the fact that you're doing it at 43 is the most important thing you can do. You'll know you've reached that point when, if someone calls you a stripping grandma, you'd genuinely laugh about it. It wouldn't bother you at all.
Don't let *your* hangups get in the way of you.
Older strippers know how to deal with different types of men and most importantly they know how to make THEM feel special. Draw on your life and dancing experience to do what the other girls struggle with and forget about yourself, your age. Put your focus where it's going to make you money, which is on the guys. The girls that have to make tons of physical contact to get them back there frankly don't have a lot of other skills. Use the skills that you have and be glad this is where you don't have competition. Even if the words don't come out of your mouth about how much experience you have, be thinking that in your mind whenever doubts come up.
Work hard on what you can control, which are your thoughts, your body, your confidence, your happiness.
-
Re: older dancer trying to prolong career
yayy for cougars...I hear time and time again from management that they prefer the 'older' dancers because we have life experience and are there to make money, we also are great conversationalists and I agree..there's no competition between us and the younger girls.
No one can guess my age at the club and despite having a degree in a 'solid' field, I enjoy dancing too and hope to do it as long as possible. I had to make a choice the other day between a 'solid' normal job and my dancing job..I came off the stage after a great first set and said fuck it I'm gonna be a dancer :)
go for it !
-
Re: older dancer trying to prolong career
ps I work at a high hustle club ..and there are plenty of men who appreciate a genuine conversation that leads to a private show over the wolves who bit earlobes and do blow jobs behind the curtain.
-
Re: older dancer trying to prolong career
Go grandma. ;)
Quote:
I've met a few dancers in their 50's & 60's
Wow 60's! That's a first for me to hear. :)
Can you limit your stage performances at all? If so do it. Then you don't have to bother getting up from a customer, or worrying about having your money interrupted.
Yeah I've always been opposed to sitting on laps and kissing is just gross so please don't feel you need to do that to compete.
There is a market for "women" as opposed to girls so don't lose site of that. Some guys are freaked out about dancing for someone that is their daughters age. They would also like to date women their own age but maybe have trouble finding one. This is where you can cash in.
The only other suggestion I have concerning looks is to stay in the best shape possible. If you have trouble spots on your body how can you improve, minimize or hide them.
Up your conversation skills too. I get bigger tips and sometimes tips just to sit and talk with or without dances.
-
Re: older dancer trying to prolong career
Woooo! thank you everyone.
It took awhile for my confidence to improve when I worked last but I kept it in my mind that I won't even acknowledge what the skanks are doing. I'm not competing with them I don't want to and I don't need to because as a mature woman I'm in a whole category of my own. I kept the MILF and cougar image in my head, started to feel really good about myself and I kicked on in the last few hours of the night, and doubled my usual earnings!
I love this website!:cloud9:
-
Re: older dancer trying to prolong career
I soooo hope the cougar/milf thing is still "in" when I'm that age! ::sigh::
-
Re: older dancer trying to prolong career
Quote:
Originally Posted by
fluffypenguin
Woooo! thank you everyone.
It took awhile for my confidence to improve when I worked last but I kept it in my mind that I won't even acknowledge what the skanks are doing. I'm not competing with them I don't want to and I don't need to because as a mature woman I'm in a whole category of my own. I kept the MILF and cougar image in my head, started to feel really good about myself and I kicked on in the last few hours of the night, and doubled my usual earnings!
I love this website!:cloud9:
WOOHOO! FANTASTIC! WAY TO GO! :drum: :party: :tube:
-
Re: older dancer trying to prolong career
Go girl! I have a couple friends that are well into their late 40's and still shaking it sexier then any 20year old. These women have had the edge because their sell is that.." I'm an experienced type of woman that you desire" ...they have that demanor of ..hey dude..if you want a REAL woman to dance for you get one from me. MEN love it!!
They don't always attract the youngsters who are getting roudy and drunk any way..but who cares. They get those older gentleman that enjoy them.
ps..I just started camming..ever thought about that too to supplement your income? Just a consideration. I'm love'n this working from home stuff!!! :) :)
xoxoox
-
Re: older dancer trying to prolong career
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Dancing Queen
Go girl! I have a couple friends that are well into their late 40's and still shaking it sexier then any 20year old. These women have had the edge because their sell is that.." I'm an experienced type of woman that you desire" ...they have that demanor of ..hey dude..if you want a REAL woman to dance for you get one from me. MEN love it!!
They don't always attract the youngsters who are getting roudy and drunk any way..but who cares. They get those older gentleman that enjoy them.
ps..I just started camming..ever thought about that too to supplement your income? Just a consideration. I'm love'n this working from home stuff!!! :) :)
xoxoox
yes, I was considering camming and/or escorting, any good suggestions on places to go?
What's the avg pay for camming and since you just started are you enjoying that?
-
Re: older dancer trying to prolong career
-
Re: older dancer trying to prolong career
Honestly alot of the older men do not want to talk to someone who is the same age as the children or grandchildren they have at home. I have a friend who is in her mid 60's and always out earns everyone because not only has she done this long enough to know what all the clients needs are she is relatable to them mentally and can hold on a great conversation. Like a fine wine a good woman only gets better with age!
-
Re: older dancer trying to prolong career
^hmmm I always thought it the opposite. Older guys like the young girls and young guys like the older girls. Grass is greener/wanting what you don't already have thing. Either way the point is there is a market for everyone.
My husband told me the other day that I look the hottest now in 7 years he's known me. Wooo hoo. Age is good! And he has no reason to lie. He's getting some regardless. LOL
-
Re: older dancer trying to prolong career
I'm 43 and recently returned to dancing after what I thought was permanent retirement from the business.
At this point in my life, I'm more confident than I've ever been, and as a result, I enjoy dancing more than I did when I was younger. I do just as well if not better than the young'uns.
I've always taken good care of my body, and continue to do so, with yoga, exercise, healthy foods, and most important, sunscreen every day! I do get regular botox and juvederm treatments. I don't have any wrinkles and my body is still firm and flexible. I honestly think I look better now than I did when I was 21.
I have plenty of life experience and plenty to talk about with customers.
Success in this business is less about chronological age and so much more about how good you look and feel and how comfortable you are in your skin.
I'm a much better stripper than I've ever been and I plan on having at least a few great years left in this business!
It's all up to you, and if it's what you want, you'll do great.:)
-
Re: older dancer trying to prolong career
I have well over 10 years experience dancing. I have honestly been a little upset with the fact that in the next couple of years I will have to exit the business. This thread has really helped me out. I have been feeling very old and I have also been looking back and I have taken inventory on all the people Ive met over the last several years and really none of them are a part of my life. I look around and I see no true friends. This is partly my fault for not being able to trust people anymore so it wouldnt be fair to blame dancing or anyone else.
The positive viewpoints of many people on this post have made me feel like being in my early 30s isnt too old, and that with age does come experiences to pull from. Those can be used in conversations with customers in an effort to make money. I think for me the issue lies more with being burnt out on people and less with my age which is how I think it is sometimes. Maybe I should take a short break and then come back to it. I think my lack of desire to really engage in dealing with and interacting with others is the immediate issue. Its amazing that I can make any money at all right now withthe way I have been feeling.