-
Make more $ being nice or pushy?
Hey there....I'm feeling in a funk cause I feel like my dancing mojo is a bit lost. :-\ I feel good going to work and have my game plan on, and then once I get to the club it all seems to go out the window and I'm not on my mark...so I'm looking for a bit of inspiration here. I think once I start talking to custys I'm not in hustler mode anymore...people seem to get intimidated by me easily so I think I come off as more casual than I should be so I don't "scare them off".
Do you ladies find that you do better being super sweet, bubbly, "apples & cinnamon" like..... or being a bit pushy, bossy " I don't really need your money you are lucky I'm allowing you to give it to me" kind of attitude.
A friend was advising me to get in their space, tell them what they are going to do, and be aggressive in a sweet way until they crumble.
I know it's very individual, but what works best for you? I feel like I'm acting like Shirley Temple when I should be Jessica Rabbit}:D
LT
-
Re: Make more $ being nice or pushy?
I don't think of Jessica Rabbit as being pushy. Personally I switch between sweet and super flirtatious... I'm never pushy though.
-
Re: Make more $ being nice or pushy?
I typically combine being extremely nice and smiley with being pushy in a not-so-obvious way. I don't consider myself bossy, though. When I say pushy, I mean that I push the guy to get a lapdance. If he seems unsure or on the brink (like the other day when this guy really seemed like he wanted one, but kept watching other girls on stage), I basically complimented the girl on stage, told him how much fun it was watching sexy girls on stage (I really do think it's fun lol), told him that we could watch the rest of the specific girl's show (since he seemed so up-in-the air about getting a dance), and then it will be MY turn to show him how I can move on top of him and pleasure him.
I said this all with a smile, in a light-hearted way, with a little giggling, while also rubbing his back. The whole time, I was standing up, instead of making myself comfortable and giving him the impression that I was there to stay.
I feel like this was a combo if being nice - my mannerisms and giving him time to watch the other girl on stage (no, he wasn't at the tip rail - he was watching from the bar), but also being "pushy" by telling him that we would play next.
This guy was a really hard sell. And I'm not going to say that what I was doing was correct, because maybe he wouldn't have been as hard of a sell if I was doing better. However, it ended up working, but we had to watch 2 girls on stage (2 songs each), before he agreed to go in the back (about 12 minutes of time spent with him). This was def okay to me bc he seemed like he would eventually get a dance, and there was nobody else to hustle.
It also seemed like a challenge bc I don't think that he preferred my body type. He seemed to like girls with really small breasts, but nice butts. I have medium breasts and a small-med butt that's not so nice.
-
Re: Make more $ being nice or pushy?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Love Technician
or being a bit pushy, bossy " I don't really need your money you are lucky I'm allowing you to give it to me" kind of attitude.
^^^I like this. I wouldn't consider it 'pushy' though. I consider this pushy: "Come on, get a dance with me. Why not? You'll really really really like it, I promise. Ready yet? Come on. Well when will you get a dance from me?" In other words, harassing guys and forcing yourself upon them when they most likely don't want you.
Btw, any dancer that asks "Why not?" after a customer turns them down for a dance is an IDIOT. If you are a girl that does this you have the worst game, you look(and are) nothing but desperate and you make me cringe. :-X
-
Re: Make more $ being nice or pushy?
^^^ I think asking "why" depends on how you ask. You are using a question to engage them in a conversation.
Sometimes if a customer seems to really not be interested in me I know its because of how I look. I can say something like "Why? Am I not your type? You can tell me." then flirt (smile, wink) a bit more. If they say you aren't their type or whatever, that's cool. The next question though should be "What is your type? Is there a girl here you like?". If he can tell me who he likes I'll go get the girl and send her over to him. The advantage of that is the customer gets what he wants, and its good karma - many dancers will return the favour once they've seen this tactic used.
-
Re: Make more $ being nice or pushy?
pushy. im a bully. when im not in bully mode i make less money. but im a fun bully, if that makes any sense. as in i will bully a customer into spending a lot of money on me and doing things my way, but i am also a lot of fun, so even if they were bullied into a champagne room they still get awesome fun entertainment.
also helps me garner in more submissive customers, who are in turn even easier to bully money out of. }:D.
-
Re: Make more $ being nice or pushy?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Kylea2
^^^ I think asking "why" depends on how you ask. You are using a question to engage them in a conversation.
Sometimes if a customer seems to really not be interested in me I know its because of how I look. I can say something like "Why? Am I not your type? You can tell me." then flirt (smile, wink) a bit more. If they say you aren't their type or whatever, that's cool. The next question though should be "What is your type? Is there a girl here you like?". If he can tell me who he likes I'll go get the girl and send her over to him. The advantage of that is the customer gets what he wants, and its good karma - many dancers will return the favour once they've seen this tactic used.
I would never do this. If they don't want me I don't take it personally and I don't need to know why. If they want another girl, well that's up to them. If they asked me for a specific girl I might go tell her to go see him if I wasn't too busy/felt that I wasn't missing out on anything by taking a minute to tell her.
Maybe some clubs are more philanthropic than the ones that I've worked at...
-
Re: Make more $ being nice or pushy?
I've found that I have to be nice, like reeeeaaallly overly nice, 95% of the time. I am tall, with long brown hair (it looks black in the club lights) and tattoos so most guys assume that I am the "dominatrix" type or whatever.....I have to go out of my way to prove to most guys that I am not that way. I tend to "intimidate" therefore when I engage in a conversation with a customer I have to go out of my way to make them feel comfortable so they see I am a sweet & nice girl despite the "gothic" (so they call it, and I am NOT gothic >:() appearance.
I used to dance to Lords of Acid and alot of hard industrial metal type stuff, and no one would come tip me. Then later when asking for dances guys would say I "scared" them. Which is REALLY fucking annoying but I have learned to blow it off and prove them wrong, make the sale and be done with it. I toned the music down too and have found my stage tips have increased big time.
Now, there are certain types that want to be pushed around and I have learned to pick them out. I had a guy just the other night that wanted me to speak to him in a harsh manner, "tell" him he was gonna get a dance or else, then of course wanted me to kick him in the balls during the dance. I will gladly oblige, but only in the VIP area where other customers can't see what's going on......that way they aren't afraid of me.
Funny how scared guys can be of women!
-
Re: Make more $ being nice or pushy?
Hey Athena...do you think you could elaborate a bit more? Feel free to PM if you prefer...thx.
-
Re: Make more $ being nice or pushy?
I have to try hard to come off nice and friendly too, people always say I look mean or angry and come off as very unapproachable.
-
Re: Make more $ being nice or pushy?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Zinaida
I would never do this. If they don't want me I don't take it personally and I don't need to know why. If they want another girl, well that's up to them. If they asked me for a specific girl I might go tell her to go see him if I wasn't too busy/felt that I wasn't missing out on anything by taking a minute to tell her.
Maybe some clubs are more philanthropic than the ones that I've worked at...
I don't take it personally either. However, I feel like the experience they get at the club will determine if they come back or not. I want to make sure the club is providing them a good experience and good customer service, and I realize that I am part of that.
-
Re: Make more $ being nice or pushy?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Zinaida
I have to try hard to come off nice and friendly too, people always say I look mean or angry and come off as very unapproachable.
I get that too. I don't understand it!!! I mean, I know being a tall brunette with tattoos has alot to do with it (people assume you are a bitch) but I get this all the time, even OTC. I swear, I can be in the best mood, smiling my ass off and people will be like "What's wrong?" Are you ok? Having a bad day?" WTF?!??!?!
I have sat down with customers before and they are like "Are you upset about something? You walk around here looking pissed" I SWEAR if I am not smiling ear-to-ear at ALL times, people say this. I mean, I do make a conscious effort to always be smiling on stage and when I am out on the floor.....but sometimes I drop the ball for a minute, say when I am making a beeline for the bathroom and have to pee, or thinking about something, and then everyone thinks I am in a bad mood.
I also have a bad habit of chewing the inside of my mouth (gross, I know) it's a BAD, bad habit that I have had for years and I tend to do it when I am nervous or in deep thought. So if I am doing that then people really think I am angry or mean, because my lips are together tight and I guess I make a weird face when I am doing it.....
-
Re: Make more $ being nice or pushy?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Athenathefabulous
pushy. im a bully. when im not in bully mode i make less money. but im a fun bully, if that makes any sense. as in i will bully a customer into spending a lot of money on me and doing things my way, but i am also a lot of fun, so even if they were bullied into a champagne room they still get awesome fun entertainment.
also helps me garner in more submissive customers, who are in turn even easier to bully money out of. }:D.
I want to be more like this! I'm going to try tonight 8)
-
Re: Make more $ being nice or pushy?
i don't have the time or energy to be nice. i am an asshole by nature. that has, somehow, always worked for me?
-
Re: Make more $ being nice or pushy?
I also have a bad habit of chewing the inside of my mouth (gross, I know) it's a BAD, bad habit that I have had for years and I tend to do it when I am nervous or in deep thought. So if I am doing that then people really think I am angry or mean, because my lips are together tight and I guess I make a weird face when I am doing it.....[/QUOTE]
That's exactly what I do! I was actually doing it while reading what you wrote lol.. It's baaad and people tell me the same all the time, too. Actually the other night a customer thought I was coked up because apparently it looked like I was grinding my jaw..
-
Re: Make more $ being nice or pushy?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Athenathefabulous
pushy. im a bully. when im not in bully mode i make less money. but im a fun bully, if that makes any sense. as in i will bully a customer into spending a lot of money on me and doing things my way, but i am also a lot of fun, so even if they were bullied into a champagne room they still get awesome fun entertainment.
also helps me garner in more submissive customers, who are in turn even easier to bully money out of. }:D.
I love this and need to practice these skills....I read the book "Why Men Love Bitches" and I think I need to re read it. I think it pays to be a fun bully...not whiny or complaining, but putting them in their place and basically ordering them to have fun.
-
Re: Make more $ being nice or pushy?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
CherryBomb954
but I get this all the time, even OTC. I swear, I can be in the best mood, smiling my ass off and people will be like "What's wrong?" Are you ok? Having a bad day?" WTF?!??!?!
I have sat down with customers before and they are like "Are you upset about something? You walk around here looking pissed"
Same here, my whole life!! It's so annoying! And even if I actually was pissed or upset, why would I want to talk about it to some random person?
I also chew my mouth up, I chew on my tongue, the insides of my cheeks, my lips... :P
-
Re: Make more $ being nice or pushy?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Love Technician
I love this and need to practice these skills....I read the book "Why Men Love Bitches" and I think I need to re read it. I think it pays to be a fun bully...not whiny or complaining, but putting them in their place and basically ordering them to have fun.
I NEED to be more like this..but just have no idea HOW because its really not in my nature- though that does change after a few hours of continuous assholes, i will get more bully-ish..but dont really know how to be pushy like that without coming off to sales-y. I just started strip+grow rich but havent really figured out how to pitch without being sales-ish?:-\
-
Re: Make more $ being nice or pushy?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
sunshine16
I just started strip+grow rich but havent really figured out how to pitch without being sales-ish?:-\
Believing in what you're saying makes a lot of sales-ish lines sound good. I also remember that a lot of guys WANT to be sold. I heard a girl this week say to a customer, "Do you want another dance or are you good for now?" That's way too nice. It sounds like she doesn't believe in her product. Practice saying some of the sales lines at home until you feel comfortable with the words.
I prefer assertive to pushy.
-
Re: Make more $ being nice or pushy?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
JRdancer
Believing in what you're saying makes a lot of sales-ish lines sound good. I also remember that a lot of guys WANT to be sold. I heard a girl this week say to a customer, "Do you want another dance or are you good for now?" That's way too nice. It sounds like she doesn't believe in her product. Practice saying some of the sales lines at home until you feel comfortable with the words.
I prefer assertive to pushy.
Oh i'm definitely not that nice haha, maybe I just need better lines ::) I usually go with 'cmon lets go have some fun' wink wink smile head nod lol. So i tell him, not ask. But still get a lot of 'well maybe in a little bit' blahh.
-
Re: Make more $ being nice or pushy?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Zinaida
I also chew my mouth up, I chew on my tongue, the insides of my cheeks, my lips... :P
OMG. I thought I was the only one! :D
-
Re: Make more $ being nice or pushy?
I think the key is to be approachable/ sweet. You can be firm or pushy in the sale, but you have to do it in a way that they don't realize they're being pushed into it. Never let 'em see behind the curtain. ;)
-
Re: Make more $ being nice or pushy?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Mindy Bares All
I think the key is to be approachable/ sweet. You can be firm or pushy in the sale, but you have to do it in a way that they don't realize they're being pushed into it. Never let 'em see behind the curtain. ;)
Mindy, do you have any opening lines or an example of what this kind of conversation would be like?
I feel like having to be so nice all the time might be hurting my hustle, because I am not being firm enough with the same part itself. HOw do you do it in a way they don't realize? Examples, if you'd like to share, pleeease!
-
Re: Make more $ being nice or pushy?
^^^ Ack. I don't have any off of the top of my head, but when I think of some really good ones I'll let you know. ;)
-
Re: Make more $ being nice or pushy?
The other night I was chatting to a group of guys and one wanted to buy his business partner a dance. He insisted he was "ok" or " I'm good"... But I stayed there anyway...he tried to avoid looking me in the face so I pushed my tits against his chest and used my hands to turn his face to look my in the eye. I just said " Look, I'm sorry but it's the doctors orders! You have to obay!" and gave a big smile. Led him over to dance and made $120.... Better than giving up and walking away empty handed!