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Hey guys, just a quick question for you ladies.
First off just want to say hello, first post here, how ya all doing?
Anyways I'll cut to the chase, I'm a guy and well I'm dating a dancer. We've been together for a little over a month and have zero issues. I didn't know she was a dancer when I first met her and once I did I thought it was pretty cool, so I don't want anyone thinking I went after her just because she is a great looking girl who 'puts out' (funny thing is she was actually one of the harder ones, which I enjoy). We are both great influences on each other and our relationship truly enhances both our lives.
Now we trust each other a lot and there is really no reason to lie to each other because we've already shared some pretty intense stuff, but I'm just curious...
How many girls give that 'special' private dance? I've met a couple of her friends, who are also dancers and I can tell there are definitely some girls who do do that type of thing and there are those who don't. I'm just wondering how common it really is and I mean how often do guys ask that stuff? I've only been to clubs a couple of times (not hers) and I try to avoid them because it's just not my style, so I really have no idea what goes on.
I don't want to sound insecure but I just don't think it would be appropriate to ask her. I would think she would of told me if she's done that type of thing, I wouldn't judge her regardless because the past is the past and I won't lie if I was a girl and someone offered me enough money I'd be hard to say no. So here I am asking you ladies to help me out with my curiosity and give it to me straight!
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Re: Hey guys, just a quick question for you ladies.
I'm not sure I know what you mean. Do you mean in clubs, or in general? Do you mean how many dancers date or go over the line? I will say in my entire life dancing I've never given anything more than a no contact air dance. I have danced for my current guy, but he was a former customer (over 15 years ago) and I am a former dancer. I've gotten more intimate with him in person, but I love him so that makes a difference.
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Re: Hey guys, just a quick question for you ladies.
Always always always costumers are costumers. Once they start paying me I see them as completely and forever incapable of dating me. I'm in a relationship too, so extras or meeting up outside the club or private paying gigs just aren't options either (even if I were single).
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Re: Hey guys, just a quick question for you ladies.
Also, you say you ave zero issues... but you've only been together a month, and this is starting to sound like an issue. Honesty is best!
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Re: Hey guys, just a quick question for you ladies.
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Re: Hey guys, just a quick question for you ladies.
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Originally Posted by
Kellydancer
I'm not sure I know what you mean. Do you mean in clubs, or in general? Do you mean how many dancers date or go over the line? I will say in my entire life dancing I've never given anything more than a no contact air dance. I have danced for my current guy, but he was a former customer (over 15 years ago) and I am a former dancer. I've gotten more intimate with him in person, but I love him so that makes a difference.
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Originally Posted by
K Sweet
Always always always costumers are costumers. Once they start paying me I see them as completely and forever incapable of dating me. I'm in a relationship too, so extras or meeting up outside the club or private paying gigs just aren't options either (even if I were single).
Well I guess I'm just wondering how common it is for girls to do more than dancing with customers in the strip clubs. I'm not worried about her really because we've been completely honest with each other so far, but I'm just curious how often it happens. I always hear stories of some friends friends paying for sex from a stripper but I mean from first hand experience I just don't see it happening. Is it something she would never bring up or what?
And not sure what you mean about customers paying and dating but I've never paid her for a dance nor seen her at work. We always joke how I basically get for free what other guys pay hundreds to see. And I didn't meet her at the club, I met her and eventually found out she was a dancer when she told me then we started dating.
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Re: Hey guys, just a quick question for you ladies.
It is always going to be different for every girl and every club. So you really are better off asking her yourself. Just don't be pushy or rude about it. Just make it a simple and sweet conversation just as some kind reassurance. You are curious about the possibility if she does it or ever has, its natural in a relationship. Just be honest. It really is the best policy. :)
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Re: Hey guys, just a quick question for you ladies.
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Originally Posted by
pixierocksonthepole
It is always going to be different for every girl and every club. So you really are better off asking her yourself. Just don't be pushy or rude about it. Just make it a simple and sweet conversation just as some kind reassurance. You are curious about the possibility if she does it or ever has, its natural in a relationship. Just be honest. It really is the best policy. :)
Alright, I figured as much. Just wasn't sure if she'd get upset for me not trusting her or whatever but I guess she wouldn't really. I guess whats a good way to open up the conversation? I mean we've talked about some weird things going down, like guys asking to be choked/beatin lol but nothing physically sexual.
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Re: Hey guys, just a quick question for you ladies.
Quote:
Originally Posted by
HighFiveSnap
Well I guess I'm just wondering how common it is for girls to do more than dancing with customers in the strip clubs. I'm not worried about her really because we've been completely honest with each other so far, but I'm just curious how often it happens. I always hear stories of some friends friends paying for sex from a stripper but I mean from first hand experience I just don't see it happening. Is it something she would never bring up or what?
And not sure what you mean about customers paying and dating but I've never paid her for a dance nor seen her at work. We always joke how I basically get for free what other guys pay hundreds to see. And I didn't meet her at the club, I met her and eventually found out she was a dancer when she told me then we started dating.
Well, I've never done anything more than dance for a customer. I can't speak for anyone else, but most of the dancers I worked with likely weren't doing tricks. I'm sure a few were but they weren't doing it in the club. I certainly never did and I am very moral when it comes to sex. My case of dating a customer is a very rare exception to the rule because in all my years of dancing it happened ONCE. Even in my case we were friends in the club, became friends outside the club, then many years later realized there was something more. Even so, we still aren't sleeping together.
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Re: Hey guys, just a quick question for you ladies.
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Originally Posted by
HighFiveSnap
Alright, I figured as much. Just wasn't sure if she'd get upset for me not trusting her or whatever but I guess she wouldn't really. I guess whats a good way to open up the conversation? I mean we've talked about some weird things going down, like guys asking to be choked/beatin lol but nothing physically sexual.
Just ask her things about her job. Get some insight. And let her know that you really are just curious and want to know how it is to be in her shoes. Understanding each other is so important. So many things can and do go wrong with there is a misunderstanding or miscommunication. And getting something like this off your chest early in the relationship, could be very helpful.
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Re: Hey guys, just a quick question for you ladies.
idk i could be completely off base with this but when i first read your question i got the feeling you were fishing the odds of getting some "extras" at the club yourself.. maybe just the way you worded it but that was my initial feeling reading it
This is a sex industry..our job as strippers/camgirls/escorts/PSO is to get dudes interested, horny and pay up. OF COURSE we're gonna be asked if we'll meet/date/fuck/suck..it's part of the territory.
Whether she's honest about if she satisfies those requests..idk you've only known her for a month, how you gonna tell if she's lying?...there are a couple escorts here who havent been upfront with their bf's..just sayin'...I guess you could always check her tax return and see if she writes off condoms as a work deduction?
If you have doubts if she's a dirty dancer then maybe you shouldn't be dating a dancer..or anyone in the adult entertainment industry
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Re: Hey guys, just a quick question for you ladies.
I'm married, but my husband has been working in and/or managing strip clubs since he was 19, so he's familiar with the whole song and dance. Even so, I am completely honest with him- the good, the bad, and the ugly. For me, the bad and the ugly is asshole grabby jerkface customers, since I'm kind of a prude in the dance department.
ASK your girlfriend what her dances are like. If she's confident in them and your relationship, she won't lie, nor will she have a need to. Also, depending on your city, normal contact may vary. I've seen everything from air dance to high two way contact of everything but the bajingo. You have to decide what you are comfortable handling. She's probably also going to blow off steam to you about idiots who try and get more than she's offering- are you prepared to hear these stories and not automatically want to be the everloving snot out of these dudes or get upset in any other way?
There's always a few whorebags in the bunch at every club, that's unavoidable. They tend to be the exception, not the rule. As long as the two of you have honesty, then you'll have much fewer bumps in the road.
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Re: Hey guys, just a quick question for you ladies.
Alright thanks a bunch, and no I'm not doubting her at all it, I wasn't sure if it was a subject that should even be boughten up. And yes she's told me about all the weirdo's who do try and get more than she's offering, seems to me like she's been upfront with everything else. Wasn't asking how to get "extras" in the club, like I said earlier I get those extras at home for free from my girl haha.
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Re: Hey guys, just a quick question for you ladies.
So a little update if anyone cares. I pretty much asked her straight up and she looked at me as if I were crazy and said she'd never do anything like that and if she did she would be in the porn business not a dancer. Thanks again girls!
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Re: Hey guys, just a quick question for you ladies.
^LOL - and if she was doing anything else would she say anything different?
I'm not saying she is but that comes off as a fairly standard response.
Don't get me wrong, IMO there are plenty of clean girls in this business but also plenty of the other type. Without getting into specifics, plenty of guys have done all sorts of nasty things with dancers that have boyfriends, husbands, etc.
I would suggest that you do some research on the club that she works at. TUSCL is my favorite as it tends to have hard core club visitors who give straight dope (you need to learn to read between the lines a little too though).
There are some clubs that are very clean, some that are notoriously dirty, and plenty that are in between. Being armed with that info. will help you have a much more candid conversation about where she works, what happens there and how she handles it.
Good luck! Also feel free to PM with club and/or geographic info. I travel the country and am pretty familiar with the reps of many of the clubs in different parts of the U.S.
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Re: Hey guys, just a quick question for you ladies.
we cant tell u if ur gf is an extras dancer. we dont kno her, so obviously we cant even really help. just b/c ur friends claim they r getting laid and paying for it, doesnt mean they actually r. guys bs all the time on getting laid.
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Re: Hey guys, just a quick question for you ladies.
So you have no issues and yet you just asked your GF of a month if she was a whore. Yeah, that's going to end well.
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Re: Hey guys, just a quick question for you ladies.
^^Pure honesty is the best policy. He was honest about his feelings about it, and she obviously appreciated that honesty from him and just simply answered him.
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Re: Hey guys, just a quick question for you ladies.
Erm not sure whats up with the hate, but of course its from some guy who frequents clubs so I wouldn't expect anything less.
There is no set way to handle relationship issues and I chose to do it this way. Like I said before I have no reason to believe she would lie to me so why should I doubt her? Why would she lie to me? She's told me much more personal things and she knows I'm not one to judge regardless of the situation.
To go into detail she said why would she risk her life with STD's and being with random people for money which she has no need for? She doesn't have any drug habits and already lives a comfortable life. We also talked about her friends who do give extras and it makes her sick and she doesn't understand why they do it. At least be safe about it and enter the porn industry for a couple of reasons. You aren't fucking disgusting losers who have to pay for sex and it's pretty safe because mostly everyone is tested.
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Re: Hey guys, just a quick question for you ladies.
"Erm not sure whats up with the hate, but of course its from some guy who frequents clubs so I wouldn't expect anything less. "
and of course we all know that guys who dont FREQUENT clubs are all angles and above board... good up standing citizens ..
your a twit ..
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Re: Hey guys, just a quick question for you ladies.
Seem I've offended you are you one of those people? But you're right, all I'm saying is his input was far from helpful unlike the other guy who provided me with a source with tons of reviews of the club (which hers turned out to be pretty decent). Anyways I've got my answer, and for those who've helped thanks again.
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Re: Hey guys, just a quick question for you ladies.
^^ funny stuff..
i do feel sorry for you , or should i say her . i guess i feel sorry for both of you . :(
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Re: Hey guys, just a quick question for you ladies.
It's cool man, enjoy spending hundreds on girls who only want your money.
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Re: Hey guys, just a quick question for you ladies.
^ He should enjoy it of course. What's wrong with that? I'm sure the ladies he's spending it on appreciates it. They're not dancing for a hug...they're dancing for money.. duh! That is their job. Like you have a job, Aren't you working for money...? C'mon!
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Re: Hey guys, just a quick question for you ladies.
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Originally Posted by
malayataylor
^ He should enjoy it of course. What's wrong with that? I'm sure the ladies he's spending it on appreciates it. They're not dancing for a hug...they're dancing for money.. duh! That is their job. Like you have a job, Aren't you working for money...? C'mon!
He can't find one to do that for free?