Bahaha! The initial visual I got from reading this was epic!
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I once was danceing for this older man close to my period.
Then I started right when I was grinding on him with my booty in his lap.
He thought I got really wet and Tryed to finger me.
Until he noticed how bloody his hand is.
I almost shit my self and was so embarased.
But he just licked his hands and said it was ok.
On his Hugo boss pants!
Wtf?! Some people I'm like what? For real? Uhhhh
Even if its fake its hard to believe someone would admit to this ! I had to read it 3 times to make sure it wasn't my imagination.
I know right. Like you said WTF.
oh gawd.
No I'm serious.
I was trying to get something from him. Lol.
You mean like this??
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jZnuJppyo4E
I am glad this thread was resurrected because it is full of win. I remember something I posted in another thread but I once danced with a Jiggly Rolls with a flabby belly and she would get on stage and wiggle her stomach to the music. Very bizarre and sadly she had a couple of regulars into that.
Maybe not the "craziest," but the grossest thing I've seen was during a bachelor party group.
New chick took the bachelor's glasses and stuffed it in her ass &she galloped around the pole, then put it back on his face.
I gave him hand sanitizer...
Had a feature girl come into the club I work at to do a toy show. She tried to stick a dildo up there while standing on one foot, holding the other leg up in the air, with a glass balanced on her head. All in 6 inch heels. ended up getting glass all over the stage, funny to watch,but so not cool.
Another feature act accidentally tipped over the giant bucket she was bathing herself in. Water EVERYWHERE, it went all over the customers sitting in the front row, so funny!!
One of the regular dancers was really drunk and fell off the stage, into a customers lap, knocking his chair over and sending them both rolling onto the floor.
1. Napoleon Dynamite song and dance, while in a wig and "vote for Pedro" shirt.
2. Climb to the top of the pole, flip over, and face plant.
I once worked at a club where part of the bachelor show was to put a firework in his ass and make him crawl around on all fours. Anyway, I'd been paid to do my first one at that club with this other girl and thank fuck she lead it because when it came to the putting the firework in his ass, his asshole was covered in shit.
Ewww I would have left the stage gagging
We have a lady who isn't allowed to do stage anymore... but she used to basically do breakdancing moves while wearing a rainbow tie dyed leotard. One of the bouncers said they got a hold of it and destroying that hideous piece of clothing was much like the scene where they trash the copier on Office Space.
There used to be a bodybuilder chick who worked there who would basically do competition flexing poses the whole time.
When I feel like the audience isn't paying attention, I'll start doing vertical pushups on the pole. Strangely have ended up with a massive amount of tips from this. And it's nice cause I work in a super high contact club, but after a show like that, all my lap dance customers just want to feel my arms. I can deal with that lol.
What does "face plant" mean?
Fall right on their face.
Some great examples here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Lef9nWH5HA
2 girls i used to work with did a great double show on the pole. They had this cool bit where they'd both be on it (spinning pole) then bring their heads together and kiss while whirling round. Guys were just so apathetic, it was awesome!
Our bar has poles on both ends of it, we turned it into a slip and slide. We were trying to see who could go the farthest and then went from one end to the other, until one of the girls went head first into the 2nd pole and rolled to the floor below. Girl was fine, just had a bump on her head from where she hit.
One of our girls had a pole break while she was climbing it. (Definitly not her fault as she was 5'8" and like 130lbs) A year later, another pole broke on her as she leaned back to go upside down. A few months after that, she had the horrible luck of trying to climb up the pole after a new girl, smothered in baby oil, had been touching the pole. I wouldn't touch a pole if I were her.....
The girl with the giant boobs would tit smack the customers that tipped her. It was kind of epic when she smacked a guy so hard she broke his nose. Not so epic when she didn't realize it and went on to the next guy... We pointed it out to her and she ran off stage embarrassed to the dressing room, a minute later came back with baby wipes and hand sanitizer for the guys. I thought that was nice of her.
Then there was our "Super secret spy" (her occupation out of the club O.o) 2 song set, nothing but squats.....