Body Issues and impending Audition
I'm having a really hard time with this. I don't know as there's much in the way of a question but I guess I need to get some of this stuff off my chest.
A couple weeks ago I went on an Audition after a couple years of not dancing. I honestly thought I had it made in the shade when I saw a couple of the girls that were working there. At least one was bigger than me. I further thought I had it in the bag when I made nine bucks in tips in two songs on the back stage. The booking lady in her mom jeans said I had too much tummy. OK, but that gut isn't going anywhere. It shrinks but never goes totally away. Ever since I hit puberty I've had a little tummy. It showed up with the boobs. At least I made an effort to conceal it and my cheese thighs by wearing a garter belt and hose.
I've been as low as 125 and a 34C. This was when I was dancing nearly every day, sometimes doubles or the occasional triple shift and AHEM keeping my energy up and my appetite down. even then I had some minor cheese and a tiny tummy.
Dancing is good exercise for me and the weight comes off pretty fast. Basically the best form of exercise for me is to not really exercise but be constantly moving like when I walk everywhere, or when I'm dancing.
It's not as if I'm porker; I'm a size ten. I get told routinely that I'm hot or I have a nice chest/butt/I'm tiny. I've got a great rack and an hourglass shape. Sure I have stuff I DON'T like. I hate my matronly upper arms and I'm pretty uncomfortable with my current weight which is around 150. I am reticent to admit to this because I don't LOOK like I weigh that much and 150 sounds like a lot. So that's an issue for me but generally speaking, I'm fairly ok with what I've got because it can always be worse. I guess I'm having a hard time with accepting my body because not only was I denied work because of it but sometimes with my average slightly flawed body I feel like I'm invisible. All I see is skinny models and actresses, which I will never be or on the other side of the coin someone like Christina Hendricks from Mad Men, which I will also never be, mostly owing to being too short. I guess I just feel like I don't matter to the world. When a club will hire girls bigger than you and smaller than you, it's hard to feel like I have a place.
So yes I have concerns and to be totally honest I could do more to address my physical shortcomings than I am now. That's not to say I do nothing, and lay around all day eating junk, staring at the tube. I eat an ok diet. I stay away from stuff like white bread/pasta/rice, sugared pop and junk food but I find it hard to actually "work out". I take my exercise in the form of walking everywhere within a three mile radius, since I don't drive and hate waiting around for the bus. So in terms of diet and exercise I'm ahead of a good portion of the american people but It's hard to muster the will to go running when it's raining sideways. It sucks. It's going to be hard for me to lose weight without dancing and it's going to be hard to get hired without losing at least ten pounds. I'm screwed!
Money is tight for me which, along with the fact that I've had to suspend my schooling indefinitely and the subsequent crushing boredom are the main reasons why I'm going out on this audition today. I'm trying to keep a positive attitude about it but it's hard to keep from letting doubts creep into my head. So I guess if I have a question it's this: what can I do? I can't lose 10 pounds in the next 8 hours (can I?) and I'm screwed if I can't get a shift somewhere. Is there something I can wear or do or a way to act or carry myself that will take some of the spotlight off of my lesser points? Failure isn't really a viable option for me. I know that if I can get steady work dancing that the weight will fall off.
Oh just a note, I know I sound like I need to see a therapist. I already have one, though I think that a trainer would probably do as much or more good and I'd have a hot body to boot. :)
Re: Body Issues and impending Audition
How come nobody just practice at home... Pole dancing is a form of exercise... If you don't even have a pole you could just practice floor work. It might not be your body.. most places will just attack your body instead of saying you just don't have attitude they like. I say work yourself up. Put some music on, dress in a killer outfit and say to hell with the world.
Re: Body Issues and impending Audition
Is there a different club you could audition at, work for a bit and tone up, and then re-audition at this place? Hiring standards are different across the board!
Re: Body Issues and impending Audition
the place i auditioned at wasn't fancy and the place I'm going to today less so. And like I said at least one of the house girls at the first place was WAY bigger than me, saggy boobs, gut, thunder thighs, the works and that's fine because I'm in no position to judge her body. it hurt to have mine judged. That being said I did try to make an effort to dress in a flattering way that concealed my less than stellar areas, whereas this gal was wearing a teeny little g string that cut into her flesh. I'll drive myself crazy. I am glad that I didn't make an ass of myself by pointing out the other bigger girls, or getting defensive or storming out, which wouldn't have made anything different, made me feel any better and just would have made things worse for me potentially. I just said nice to have met you and left.
it's been a while since I've worked steadily so I'm just trying to get my feet wet while hopefully making some small christmas money. The big fancy clubs have always intimidated me and I've never seen myself as that type. I could wear the clothes and get the fake nails and the hair extensions and the spray tan and the whatever else but I'm not sure I'd feel comfortable. I've always felt more at ease working in titty bars than in strip clubs. Maybe once I've gotten back to my fighting weight I could give it a go. I'm not ruling it out. Just not where my head is at right now. I'm trying to set achievable goals. It seems much more reasonable to get in at a relaxed local dive when I'm trying to put my toe back in the water.
One potential stumbling block is my age. I got started at dancing late, 27, 28 so you do the math. I don't look my age but then again, at the ripe old age of 27 I was called a fat old lady by one particularly abusive booker, so really who knows.
Thanks for your help guys. I really appreciated the pep talk!
Re: Body Issues and impending Audition
if anyone cares, my audition turned into a real shift at another joint and after two sets i was fired for being too "curvy". god i hate that word. just say fat, you know? nevermind that the two customers in the bar on a monday afternoon were both tipping and one of them was gushing over how beautiful I was, and left as soon as I said goodbye. the girl they brought in to relieve my fat ass was kind of a butterface, but at least she was skinny. apparently that's all that matters. I swear, I am about to start slicing at myself with razor blades. wish I had some some anesthesia and a real scalpel. not that nonspecific slicing that teenage girls do on their wrists but specific crescent shapes so that when they stitch me up my thigh cheese will be gone
Re: Body Issues and impending Audition
I wish I had a proper computer to type out a nice LNG response on, instead of this stupid iPhone. But I don't. So this will be short and sweet.
My fat ass (about 160 ATM) makes good money working at one of the nicest gentlemens clubs In Town. I'm probably the biggest gal there. Push up your tits honey, stick out your ass and audition with confidence. There are men who like tummy on their women - a smart club will realize this and have at least one plus sized girl on their roster. What men don't like is women with low self esteem.
There is money to be made for you size-10 self. Go find it. And once you do, go get yourself a trainer to whip your ass into shape (I get the feeling from your op thatyoud be more comfortable if you lost a few pounds).
Good luck babe!
Re: Body Issues and impending Audition
Quote:
Originally Posted by
IvytheStripper
if anyone cares, my audition turned into a real shift at another joint and after two sets i was fired for being too "curvy". god i hate that word. just say fat, you know? nevermind that the two customers in the bar on a monday afternoon were both tipping and one of them was gushing over how beautiful I was, and left as soon as I said goodbye. the girl they brought in to relieve my fat ass was kind of a butterface, but at least she was skinny. apparently that's all that matters. I swear, I am about to start slicing at myself with razor blades. wish I had some some anesthesia and a real scalpel. not that nonspecific slicing that teenage girls do on their wrists but specific crescent shapes so that when they stitch me up my thigh cheese will be gone
Ugh, that sucks. If at first you don't succeed, try try again.
Ive been fired for being too fat before. It hurts. But then you get up and find some place new. Keep auditionng until yu find a place to hire you, and keep working on Yyour body. Things will get better.
Re: Body Issues and impending Audition
Quote:
Originally Posted by
4everresolutions
Ugh, that sucks. If at first you don't succeed, try try again.
Ive been fired for being too fat before. It hurts. But then you get up and find some place new. Keep auditionng until yu find a place to hire you, and keep working on Yyour body. Things will get better.
I've been fired for being fat too (at 130!!)...it really does hurt. But keep trying other clubs! Thats what I did, and it worked out for me in the end! :)
Could there be anything else that you are not considering because you are worried about your weight? Does your costume not fit the club? Some places won't hire anything over 110, no matter what, just like some won't hire with tattoos, or short girls, or girls without waist length hair....I got turned down from an audition once because they already had a pale redhead with tattoos!! Deep breath, and keep on trying!!
Re: Body Issues and impending Audition
I'm so glad someone made this post!
When I was dancing regularly my weight stayed steady at about 125lbs.
Cut to a year without dancing and I'm currently 160lbs.
It's been really hard to work off the weight, but I know if I were dancing it would come off much faster. Maybe I should find myself a divey little place to dance until I get my old body back.
Re: Body Issues and impending Audition
Iam going to be harsh here but you dont get a job dancing to lose weight! Guys are paying top dollar for a fantasy girl. Op you sound like you dont want to do the work to get in shape! We are dancers and make money because we are more exceptional than the average women. I see girls all over this board compaining they cant get hired there too big but they will lose weight once there hired. It doesnt work like this and if you are making a living off of your body, keep it in shape when your not doing this. Its not rocket science go to a gym and have a healthy diet! It will help you in the long run no matter what you choose to do in life. If it were easy we wouldnt make so much.
Re: Body Issues and impending Audition
Ivy, sorry to hear that's happened to you :( Best of luck sticking to a healthy lifestyle and diet and don't let it discourage you from trying again <3
Re: Body Issues and impending Audition
Wow, I'm so so so thankful you posted this because I really could have just written it myself. All of it. Every word!!! Just know, you are totally not alone, I sympathize with every single thing you said. I'm in the same boat as you, same size and almost the same weight (a little more) I don't know how tall you are, but that's beside the point, and I also have problems getting jobs because of my little flaws. I too, have had a tummy since forever, I try and try and try to get rid of it, and nothing works. I too, have a nice rack, and a nice butt, customers tell me this all the time, its the tummy that kills my figure: its shrunk by almost 20 pounds since april and its still a problem, it probably always will be!
I'm back at home for xmas break and having a hard time finding a good money club to work at (I have the dive I worked at over the summer which I LOVE to death, but I need to save some serious money for school, and I need to do it NOW). I went to this club my friends work at and the manager wouldn't even acknowledge me, barely even looked at me before telling me no, "too many girls already". I've been to this club before and been told I was too big, so I'm pretty sure it was a rejection.
The only thing you can do is work somewhere else unfortunately :( I wish I had better advice but any advice on weightloss you can give to someone who already eats well and gets their excersise would probably be not adviseable, because there are things you can do, but they're probably not good ideas anyways. Just keep your chin up! You'll find a job eventually, and it is better you work somewhere where you can have your little flaws, it wouldn't be fun to be constantly stressing about your weight to keep a job would it? I wish you luck :)
Re: Body Issues and impending Audition
After I had my baby, I was put on dayshift due to my weight and not hired at some places I would have liked at the time so I know the feeling and it sucks. This is a really harsh part of this industry and I sympathize with you. May I ask how tall you are? I don't doubt that you are smoking hot and have the ability to make money, but the reality is in most clubs a size 10 IS considered too big. It sounds like you have a nice shape so it might not hurt to just start doing some specific exercise and higlight your shape by losing some bodyfat.
Re: Body Issues and impending Audition
Quote:
Originally Posted by
sananeko
. It might not be your body.. most places will just attack your body instead of saying you just don't have attitude they like. I say work yourself up. Put some music on, dress in a killer outfit and say to hell with the world.
I once got rejected by a club that seemed to be into long dresses and gowns (I wasn't aware of that, so so I showed up to the audition with my usual cover ups) and really picky with dancers. Plus, I got on stage with a g-sting and boots, and they don't allow them (I wasn't aware of that rule either, they are a "full bottoms" bar with pasties that resemble nipples, plus, nobody told me that the only shoes allowed are the platform sandals with no legwarmers or socks). So, when I got the results, I was told that I didn't made it because of my outfit and because the manager claimed I wasn't that good as a dancer. He kept insisting that he rather have a "seven" with killer moves than a "ten" (referring to me, since he pointed at me) that only shakes her ass and does pole maneuvers. He kept on feeding me with that BS and then he mentioned that I needed to lose my muscles. That's when I had it and I told him that I have larger muscles than him, and he wishes he had my muscles. He didn't say anything (it seemed he even agreed on that), and told me to come back when I had improved my dancing, and when I buy more modest bottoms and long cover ups. Ah, before I left, he also told me that he feels he loses customers whenever I show up to that bar, since I'm always so flirty with everyone and lure them to see me somewhere else (with great deal of success!!!)
So, I got some gowns and some boyshorts. Then, I came back, and they claimed that they weren't hiring anymore!!! It pissed me so much that they had hired some lesser looking girls just because they have been dancing forever in other clubs.
I just gave up with this club; is a very nice one with lots of customers and with more money making potential, but well, I guess I stick with dives, since every time I start working in a dive, more people "magically" show up and lift the place.
Ah, I'm also a size six.
This club is Headlights/JB's Gallery of Girls in Chesapeake, Virginia. They claim to be the largest go go bar in the state of Virginia. I mean, if they claim to be largest, shouldn't they had more dancers, and/or eager to have more than the competition?! Well, they're the ones that are losing the money other places are making out of me.