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How do you girls get guys to buy you stuff
I can understand how a dancer can easily work a customer good enough so he drops all his money on her in either lap dances or the CR. Hell it's happened to me.
What I can't understand, is how a dancer can get certain guys to buy them gifts; jewelry, dinners, paying off their bills; etc. unless they were ho-ing themselves out on the side. What exactly is going to make a guy to want do all this stuff, especially when there's no reward (ie. sex or a relationship)?
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Re: How do you girls get guys to buy you stuff
How about blind stupidity?
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Re: How do you girls get guys to buy you stuff
I'm aware of the blind and stupid part.
Just wondering how a guy who I assume is at least average in common sense and intelligence end up becoming blind to the obvious pitfalls and stupid enough to do all of this.
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Re: How do you girls get guys to buy you stuff
OK, all kidding aside. It's called loneliness. If a guy is lonely enough he will do nice things for anyone, including the nearest available stripper, who is nice to him.
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Re: How do you girls get guys to buy you stuff
There should be a guy way to round up all the lonely guys in the world and drop them off at their local orphanage/soup kitchen/etc. lol
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Re: How do you girls get guys to buy you stuff
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Originally Posted by
yoda57us
OK, all kidding aside. It's called loneliness. If a guy is lonely enough he will do nice things for anyone, including the nearest available stripper, who is nice to him.
I don't even think he needs to be lonely. I've had customers buy me stuff that were nothing but friends - guys I've known for years. Beyond the hope that they think somewhere in the back of there mind that they may be able to actually hook up with the dancer, there are also the guys who really LOVE making other people happy. Most of the time its a matter of the girl saying how much she enjoys something (possibly on a whim), & the guy having enough money to access it. Here's the catch though - they don't always go out to buy something. There are times when in there eyes you are so much of a "friend" that if they happen to be somewhere, & see something the know you would LOVE, they'll buy it & surprise you with it... just like they might do with any of their other friends.
A lot of things mentioned in the original post though are because the guy either takes pity on the entertainer (paying off bills) or he's attempting to romance her (jewelry). With those, it often happens the most to with the entertainers that either do the "woe is me" spiel or they take things with the guy soooooo slow, that he thinks the only way he's going to get anywhere is to heavily romance her. It could also be a sugardaddy situation too though, where they simply want to make the woman happy because they enjoy her company & attention outside the traditional club setting. Think about this though, once you sleep with a guy - how many of them really want to hang around & spoil you? Not too many.
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Re: How do you girls get guys to buy you stuff
Some of the dancer clothing stores actually facilitate this by giving a girl a special account where she can have a guy come in and put money in that account or buy certain things for her that she wants. So it happens quite a bit.
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Re: How do you girls get guys to buy you stuff
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Originally Posted by
Slin
I'm aware of the blind and stupid part.
Just wondering how a guy who I assume is at least average in common sense and intelligence end up becoming blind to the obvious pitfalls and stupid enough to do all of this.
Because there are no shortage of men who, while having two heads, only have enough blood in their system to work one of them effectively at a time.
In those men as soon as the little head goes up, the bigger one shuts down.
Simple as that.
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Re: How do you girls get guys to buy you stuff
Don't need to be a stripper for this one ya'll. I have several male friends that have bought me stuff over the years. They know me from other places and have never seen me in the strip club once. Some people are more generous than others. Loneliness plays a factor. But the most obvious thing is that hope that the gift will facilitate some kind of romance.
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Re: How do you girls get guys to buy you stuff
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Originally Posted by
Slin
I can understand how a dancer can easily work a customer good enough so he drops all his money on her in either lap dances or the CR. Hell it's happened to me.
What I can't understand, is how a dancer can get certain guys to buy them gifts; jewelry, dinners, paying off their bills; etc. unless they were ho-ing themselves out on the side. What exactly is going to make a guy to want do all this stuff, especially when there's no reward (ie. sex or a relationship)?
First off, that is a dumb and nasty assumption stemming from ignorance.
Second, it is quite common. Not really my gig per se, but I have seen it happen too many times to count - usually involving guys trying to curry favor with clothes, jewelry, etc. I will also say that, IME, many (but certainly not all) of the girls that I've seen receive gifts were not giving it up OTC.
I once knew a girl that was so talented at making guys fall for her that she received jewelry and several other gifts from multiple guys in a short window of time, and these were not desparate or lonely guys by any stretch. Hell, one guy bought her an expensive German car, though for him it was not a life changing expense. Now he is the only one I knew that did actually get laid by her out of the deal, but before he was done he shelled out a lot to her in cash and prizes.
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Re: How do you girls get guys to buy you stuff
A few possibilities:
(1) She's a pickup artist. How does a male pickup artist get a "nice" girl to give him bootie (worth $300 to $700 in the open market), when he has no intention of making her his GF or even spending any money on her? He develops attraction, creates a fantasy of the ideal and exciting man, plans and strategizes for the perfect seduction, etc. Dancers are pickup artists, too. They can appear charming, understanding, empathic, tender, sensual, etc. - causing the poor lonely bastard to develop romantic feelings that persist, even without sexual gratification. She strings him along, making him believe that he may someday become her romantic partner.
(2) A genuine friendship develops. He's wealthy, but unhappy - with selfish spoiled wife and kids. He doesn't want to have sex with the dancer (because of his morals), but he values her company very much and wants to express his affection for her with gifts. She's the only thing in his life that has a calming and soothing effect on him. He can talk to her for hours, without feeling judged or criticized. His spoiled wife at home spends most of money on overpriced clothes, furniture, etc., so why not lavish this beautiful dancer with a few small gifts - she treats him much better than his nagging wife. Moreover, he'd rather buy her a few gifts, than see that money go towards buying the 200th pair of expensive shoes for his overindulged wife. He also respects and sympathizes with the dancer because she's overcome many obstacles and has worked hard (unlike his spoiled wife, whose never worked a day in her life, and has had everything handed to her in a silver platter). They swap sad stories, console each other, etc... At times, he fantasizes that he's her BF, at other times, he feels paternal - he wants to help her out. He feels invested in her wellbeing.
(3) Money is no object. As an illustration - let's say you went to a third-world country where lap dances cost $2 each and VIPs cost $10. For $7, you could buy a trinket to give your favorite dancer as a gift and it would make her glow with joy and be very thankful - you become her favorite custie, who she loves to see and she really warms up to you (no sex, but she's very cuddly with you and givers you preferential treatment - e.g., whenever she sees you, she always walks away from whatever company she's with and rushes over to welcome you back)... This is what its like for rich guys - dropping money on jewelry, clothes, etc. is comparable to the average guy buying a $7 trinket and getting lots of love for this cheap purchase.
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Re: How do you girls get guys to buy you stuff
Its also a nice way to say thank you after a blow job!!!
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Re: How do you girls get guys to buy you stuff
I guess I was asking this because it seemed beyond my reality.
My buddy knows a chick who makes a game of going out to bars and clubs and seeing how many guys she can get to buy a drink for her. She's pretty good at stringing them along until they buy her the drink at which point she ignores them. I understand the mentality but I just couldn't imagine it being effective to the point that guys will shell out 4 figures. Apparently I was wrong!
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Re: How do you girls get guys to buy you stuff
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Originally Posted by
Slin
I guess I was asking this because it seemed beyond my reality.
My buddy knows a chick who makes a game of going out to bars and clubs and seeing how many guys she can get to buy a drink for her. She's pretty good at stringing them along until they buy her the drink at which point she ignores them. I understand the mentality but I just couldn't imagine it being effective to the point that guys will shell out 4 figures. Apparently I was wrong!
It's the exact same thing, some guys just have more money than others, that's basically it, some people make 30k a year, some make 300k.
A drink to you might be a car to some other guy, price and income wise...and strippers more than likely are more skilled at stringing guys along than your normal chick at a bar getting a $3 drink...
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Re: How do you girls get guys to buy you stuff
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Originally Posted by
Rookie2010
It's the exact same thing, some guys just have more money than others, that's basically it, some people make 30k a year, some make 300k.
True but there are also guys who fall into a trap that they can't really afford.
Thus the coining of my oft-quoted "Don't spend the milk money" warning....
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Re: How do you girls get guys to buy you stuff
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Originally Posted by
yoda57us
True but there are also guys who fall into a trap that they can't really afford.
Thus the coining of my oft-quoted "Don't spend the milk money" warning....
I could see that, i'm sure some men get their Paycheck and head over to the local SC and give their entire check to "Destiny" or whatever her name may be :D
Did you Ever make that mistake yourself when you first started SC'ing?
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Re: How do you girls get guys to buy you stuff
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Originally Posted by
Rookie2010
I could see that, i'm sure some men get their Paycheck and head over to the local SC and give their entire check to "Destiny" or whatever her name may be :D
Did you Ever make that mistake yourself when you first started SC'ing?
Not with my paycheck but I used to use credit cards to pay for VIP time. Very bad idea! You can run-up some pretty serious debt very quickly if you are not careful. I wised-up very early on but I also never equated spending more on a girl with currying any sort of favor with her beyond a customer/dancer friendly business relationship. I pay for dances, I don't pay for affection. Guys who spend money and are respectful will always get treated well. The guys who are prone to over spending have fooled themselves into thinking that the money will buy something beyond lap dances and a big smile from your fav when you walk in to the club.
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Re: How do you girls get guys to buy you stuff
The title of the topic is "How do you girls..." - awful lot of blues posting here!;D
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Re: How do you girls get guys to buy you stuff
The times I've seen this type of behaviour from my guy friends has been because they were very lonely, and felt that the only way an attractive female would pay any attention to them was by buying her "love".
Very sad indeed.
I have never personally succumbed to this particular phenomenom myself, even during my early days of clubbing. But I must admit there have been a few close calls over the years :O
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Re: How do you girls get guys to buy you stuff
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Originally Posted by
yoda57us
The guys who are prone to over spending have fooled themselves into thinking that the money will buy something beyond lap dances and a big smile from your fav when you walk in to the club.
See, the extras dancers here in Houston are very ethical about it. They tell you that a HJ costs $200 and a BJ costs $300 and they deliver on their promise; they don't string you along. I don't buy these extras, but I get the sales pitches.
I spend about $100 - $150 on lap dances (not including cover, drinks, etc.), which I consider reasonable. Why an average guy (with an average job/income) would spend more than $300 just to get dances is incomprehensible to me. Dude, if you're going to spend that much, buy a BJ - get more bang for your buck. Plus, the desire is gone afterwards, so you don't continue spending.
(Of course, if the guy is loaded and money is no object to him, he's free to go around buying all the dancers sportscars.)
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Re: How do you girls get guys to buy you stuff
You are working under the assumption that the average guy spending a decent amount of cash is going to SC's to get extras. This might sound crazy to you, but not every guy going to the SC is looking to Pop his load.
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Re: How do you girls get guys to buy you stuff
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Originally Posted by
lopaw
I have never personally succumbed to this particular phenomenom myself, even during my early days of clubbing. But I must admit there have been a few close calls over the years :O
Dating back a couple of years, my estranged fav has a very nice laptop and an expensive flat screen TV along with many other things so it does happen even to Junkies who should know better. The Great Recession has taught me to be more hard hearted and frugal but I have to admit I enjoyed the days when I could spend thousands like it was nothing.
FBR
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Re: How do you girls get guys to buy you stuff
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Originally Posted by
jack0177057
See, the extras dancers here in Houston are very ethical about it. They tell you that a HJ costs $200 and a BJ costs $300 and they deliver on their promise; they don't string you along. I don't buy these extras, but I get the sales pitches.
Actually hardcore "extras girls" don't generally attract the kind of guys we are talking about and they don't really want to. Extras girls are interested in cranking it out-getting the guy off and moving on to the next one. It's a volume business for them. The guys who try to buy affection don't want a whore. They have a twisted view of the ladies to begin with and most of it revolves around the fantasy of a relationship, not the reality of a blow job.
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Re: How do you girls get guys to buy you stuff
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Originally Posted by
FBR
Dating back a couple of years, my estranged fav has a very nice laptop and an expensive flat screen TV along with many other things so it does happen even to Junkies who should know better. The Great Recession has taught me to be more hard hearted but I have to admit I enjoyed the days when I could spend thousands like it was nothing.
FBR
Don't you wish though that, that laptop and expensive flat screen TV and many other things were in your house right now and not hers?
Not saying that it's wrong or judging or anything like that but you say you enjoyed it in a way that i'm seeing it as you wish you could continue to do so? Is this a correct assumption or am i wrong here? Just wondering..trying to learn from others experiences.
And if you could, would you still be? & why?
I find that very intriguing.
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Re: How do you girls get guys to buy you stuff
Quote:
Originally Posted by
FBR
Dating back a couple of years, my estranged fav has a very nice laptop and an expensive flat screen TV along with many other things so it does happen even to Junkies who should know better. The Great Recession has taught me to be more hard hearted and frugal but I have to admit I enjoyed the days when I could spend thousands like it was nothing.
FBR
In my case it was a PC for one gal and some very nice clothing and jewelry for another. LOL, I think it was January of 2003 when the CC bills arrived after Christmas that I finally wised up! I still give small gifts to three or four favs but they also reciprocate so it's not a one sided thing. It's a fine line. I love giving gifts but I've learned when and what is appropriate.