Domme vs. Sub persona? esp. in older dancer
Hello! jack0177057 made a comment on another thread to the effect that an older dancer should display a Domme rather than Sub persona to be successful, and I'm curious on the general agreement/disagreement with this statement and the reasons why.
I'm considering starting a stripping career over the age of thirty, and as a submissive in my personal life, am extremely curious as to whether I would need to adopt a Domme persona to suceed in this potential career (assuming I could get a job as opposed to just getting laughed off the stage ;D.)
Your thoughts are welcome . . .
Re: Domme vs. Sub persona? esp. in older dancer
Wouldn't it be cool to have both personas in your back pocket? You could switch them up and see what gets you the most dough. Tailor your hustle to the guy. Experiment with different themed outfits and see what works best.
My two cents.
Btw, good luck to you in your new career should you decide to do it. Let us know how it goes.
Re: Domme vs. Sub persona? esp. in older dancer
In my experience, you don't get as many repeat customers if you act like you're in charge... men are men, and if you look at statistics on most kink websites, the majority of men list themselves as being dominant. I've always gotten much more if I act like the guy's in charge. That being said, it could be good to appeal to a minority group, because you could become their favorite if you are the only "Domme" in the club.
Re: Domme vs. Sub persona? esp. in older dancer
Quote:
Originally Posted by
hockeybobby
Wouldn't it be cool to have both personas in your back pocket? You could switch them up and see what gets you the most dough. Tailor your hustle to the guy. Experiment with different themed outfits and see what works best.
My two cents.
Btw, good luck to you in your new career should you decide to do it. Let us know how it goes.
I would describe myself this way. I can be VERY dominating and bossy with a man, or I can be very subservient and docile. In my personal life, I prefer to take the submissive role in a relationship, as I like to feel as though someone takes care of me and is in charge. If I can whip a guy around too much, I lose respect for him. In my hustling life, I usually gauge what kind of person the guy is. If he seems to be the type who likes the babydoll thumbsucker dumbass, I'll play less of the intelligent, independent woman thing. If the guy seems like a sub (which I love) I'll be very domineering and coerce the guy into doing more dances. I can be so manipulative and evil! But I do what works and what gets me the most $$$.
Re: Domme vs. Sub persona? esp. in older dancer
Why is this even a factor? You need to mold yourself into what the guy is looking for. It is just a power-play thing in your real life, I guess. But a club is a different place with all kinds of people in it. Most are looking for self-assured women who like to play out their sexiness, not their domination and not a wimpy submissive either which could give you troubles with certain customers.
Re: Domme vs. Sub persona? esp. in older dancer
Whatever role you play for the customers, the only way to play at being a successful dancer is to think domme all the way. The more you control the guys, however you do it, the more money they will give you. Think like a vampire.
I would never go for it myself, but from what I've heard from girlfriends, dancer friends, and co-workers, there are a surprising number of guys who really get into this. There are guys who like to get their balls squished with heels. There are guys who like to be smacked on the face and whipped with their own belt (I saw a guy get a couple hours straight of this shit in the Champagne Room, back when they made me monitor it with the cameras). There are even guys who want you to make them drink your pee. Believe it.
Re: Domme vs. Sub persona? esp. in older dancer
I danced in my early thirties, I was always very submissive--this custie from Amsterdam told me that he thought all dancers were submissive, that a dancer was always "the slave" If you run into a male sub he'll let you know what he's looking for sometimes. I think it's referred to as "controlling from the bottom"
Re: Domme vs. Sub persona? esp. in older dancer
As long as you take care of yourself I don’t like your hustle has to be that much different. But why not play with both.
Re: Domme vs. Sub persona? esp. in older dancer
I'm also over 30 (and am starting to look it, lol) but anyhow, you can be successful in markets where there is a large demographic of older men. Most of these old guys (unless they have pedophylic tendencies) are not going to want an 18 year old who looks like she's 12 rubbing on their cock with her bare butt cheeks. In some places, a lot of this work is showmanship. In some other places, the high-cost ones where the majority of the money is to be made in vip, it's more about being able to talk to the guys, being a companion. The catch is getting the feel of how to connive the men into paying for that companionship by going into a private vip. You have to be a good salesman. The part about sales is that if you appear too dominant, it'll make the men retreat their offer for pay/go in the vip/buy dances. There is a certain finesse that goes into sales. You need to maintain a level of control over yourself and your situation at all times, while also manipulating your target to whom you are trying to make that sale. You need to be in control, without your target realizing that you are the dominant one. I wouldn't say this is all submission. It's just...sales. You need to gain some experience to relate to what I'm talking about. Hopefully, some girls on here know what I mean...
I've found that, for me, when I make up my mind to do only individual dances because I don't feel like dealing with a perv in a private room in cases where the club condones if not outright encourages prostitution, being aggressive/overly dominant works for me. I don't spend much time wasting it by making small-chat/sitting around customers. I simply 'wanna dance' them, get myself a 'yes' or a 'no' and move on. You go into a sort of pilot mode and can really 'clean up' in a few hours if the club is busy, in a high-income area and you put your mind to it.
There are some clubs that are a bit more slower paced, and the money is all in selling rooms. A lot of times you can gauge the chemistry with a guy, and sit down with him if things feel right. You're not necessarily being submissive. Sometimes, the guy wants you to sit down as a condition of potentially going to a vip. I had one guy in Miami do this to me, and he wanted me to drink alongside him before going to vip. There was some dominance going on there, and I've submitted but it was also a matter of companionship, doing something that his wife wasn't willing to do. You gotta figure out what the customer's is missing and provide it to them while making that sale.
But it's all mostly about feeling the environment and customers out. Stripping is sometimes a game of submission and/or domination, but it shouldn't be. It is when ppl with head issues come into a club to act out on the dancers and/or when dancers mistreat the customers as a result. It should be more about entertainment and the selling of entertainment that people don't really need at luxury prices. Sales requires a certain finesse that'll take you some time to develop.
Personally, I hate hate hate sales. I enjoy the companion aspect of dancing, and entertaining and making ppl happy bit. But at the core, dancing is sales more than anything and I think I've summed it pretty well.
Good luck!