Re: No-contact dancing...
It's very hard to get a chid taken away from their mother, let alone from BOTH their parents. Get a good lawyer and fight them.
As for giving no-contact dances in a contact area, be prepared to lose out on sales. Personally, I think the best thing is to be open about how much contact you allow right away before starting the dance. It may be difficult for you to sell strings if grinding and heavy contact is the norm, but maybe you can focus on selling VIP/CRs where dancing/contact isn't as much of a focal point as conversation?
Just as an aside, if you're working in a club where heavy contact is expected, just because YOU aren't offering that, doesn't mean people (ie. your parents) won't think you are. If you really think stripping could lead to you losing your son, it might be best to hold off on dancing until the custody battle is over and find some other source of income, because when it comes down to it, your word that you aren't providing heavy contact may not hold much strength against the club's reputation.
Re: No-contact dancing...
I told my mom. She said she understands I have to do what I have to do. And I told her it would be different than before. I'm no longer worried about it affecting whether or not I get my son back.
Still interested on ideas for how to provide a decent lapdance without ginding. =P
Re: No-contact dancing...
I can't offer any advice or help on your legal battle or how dancing will affect that, but you can still bank on non contact dances even if the other girls go hard mileage. Be confident, tell the guys with lots of self assurance that they have never had a dance like the dances you give, and then make a dance a real tease, a flirt. They already know its a dance, not more, so go slow, make eye contact, make them think you want them. Tease them. Its called strip TEASE for a reason. Don't back down and don't ever let a guy make you feel bad for sticking to your guns.
Re: No-contact dancing...
^^^ for better or worse, where family courts are concerned there won't be any de-facto distinction between being a 'stripper' who provides contact dances to customers and a 'stripper' who provides non-contact dances to customers in terms of the court's opinion of a mother. Some courts will consider a mother's choice to 'strip' in order to provide for her children as an admirable display. Other courts will consider any girl's choice to 'strip' as a possible red flag of a potentially unsuitable environment for children.
Point #1 - are contact lap dances actually 100% legal in your jurisdiction ? Just because contact lap dances are provided by all dancers in your area on a nightly basis, and just because those dancers haven't been busted, does NOT mean that contact lap dances are legal under that jurisdiction's prostitution / lewd conduct laws. As such, if contact lap dances are in fact illegal in your jurisdiction, an admission in court ( documents or testimony ) that you give contact lap dances could be considered an admission of the 'crime' of prostitution / lewd conduct. While you wouldn't be prosecuted, a family court could potentially construe such an admission as grounds to consider you an 'unfit mother'.
Point #2 - I would hesitate to judge a single conversation with your mother as complete reassurance that you're 'safe' from a family court challenge. At the very least, a court is going to review your divorce documents in detail. On that basis alone, family court / child welfare services attention could be drawn to your situation.
Re: No-contact dancing...
Its difficult to comment on your court situation (I wonder why your parents are trying to take your child away - and if they are, I would not count on their reassurance that they "understand" you stripping) but what I would say is much the same as Melonie's comment. If a court decided to judge you for being a stripper, I highly doubt that protesting that you do not grind is going to make a lot of difference.
I would be more concerned with finding a good lawyer who would be able to defend you, and building up evidence to show yourself in the best possible light as a "good mother". This could be in the form of a credit report, bank statements to show that you have a steady income, records from schools or daycare's to show attendance to parent evenings, help with school or daycare events, etc. Can you get testimonials from people in "positions of authority" to show that you are responsible? I would also suggest getting voluntarily drug tested - many people have an assumption that all strippers are drug addicts, and this is a good way to attack that stereotype.
To me, the bigger things are far more important than trying to argue the distinction between contact and no-contact dances.
(And as melonie says, if contact dances are illegal, I would not admit to performing them anyway. )