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If you don't want to be raped, don't dress like a slut!
Toronto Constable told students at Toronto's York University that if they didn't want to get raped, then they shouldn't dress like sluts. ::)
This prompted 3 young women to organize a 'Slut March' in front of the police department.
http://dlisted.com/node/41463 <- I'll look for a better, less asshole-ish article, but in the mean it gets the story out.
Seems to be a sad new pattern as of late when it comes to authority figure's take on rape; blame the victim. Obviously it's our fault for looking so damn hot. I find this very upsetting. Things like this make me feel so helpless; like if I were to ever be assaulted the police in my own city wouldn't take it seriously because I'm a slut/stripper.
Added: Actual slut walk website http://www.slutwalktoronto.com/
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Re: If you don't want to be raped, don't dress like a slut!
We're all smart enough to figure out that rape is more or less an equal opportunity crime. It happens to the old, the young, the fully clothed, the near nude, the conservative, and the sluts. It's quite silly to make a statement like what was made unless you're just looking for media attention.
That said... The idea of a "slut march" is really very amusing to me, though... and the girls all had really great attitudes about what they were doing, which was nice. I was worried it was going to be a stereo typical ANGRY women's rights thing like we see here and which are IMPOSSIBLE to take seriously.
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Re: If you don't want to be raped, don't dress like a slut!
There was an 80 year year old woman who was raped not far from me a few years ago. She definitely shouldn't have been wearing muumuus because those turned on men.
Seriously though, is anyone surprised by this? I'm not because there is a blame the victim lately for everything.
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Re: If you don't want to be raped, don't dress like a slut!
^ Its easier to blame the victim instead of taking the real route. Erhm those crooked cops.
I find it so stupid. When a female dresses slutty for whatever reason, she should know the risks she takes (looks, men drolling, commenting etc) but rape is not one of them. So many studies indicate rape depends on the rapists itself, he will haunt, rape based on his skills not what a woman wears; but the easier target to rape. Whether its young, old, naked or clothed, it doesnt matter but they seek out their easist target.
I was listening to the radio, the hosts were making fun of the slut walk. To a degree, I agreed with them, as some girl wore a thong and see-through leggings that showed her bare ass in day light.. too far? For me yes, but I do support their main idea.
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Re: If you don't want to be raped, don't dress like a slut!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Kisca
To a degree, I agreed with them, as some girl wore a thong and see-through leggings that showed her bare ass in day light..
Thought that was normal?
http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2009/...05_468x821.jpg
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Re: If you don't want to be raped, don't dress like a slut!
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Re: If you don't want to be raped, don't dress like a slut!
There is a flipside to the coin. It's a minority, I know... but there are some women out there who will cry 'rape' as a means of social leverage. Rape is a serious matter, it should not be accused on a whim. I've seen girls who broke up with their boyfriends and accused them of rape just for revenge. I've had women tell my friends that someone raped them, even though they'd never had any physical contact with them at all, just to get back for some minor percieved slight. Granted, most of the time stuff like this happens when women are younger and don't think about the consequences of their actions. Still, it's a serious issue on both sides.
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Re: If you don't want to be raped, don't dress like a slut!
That has nothing to do with dressing slutty.
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Re: If you don't want to be raped, don't dress like a slut!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
DesuvsDeath
We're all smart enough to figure out that rape is more or less an equal opportunity crime. It happens to the old, the young, the fully clothed, the near nude, the conservative, and the sluts. It's quite silly to make a statement like what was made unless you're just looking for media attention.
I AM NOT AGREEING with the Toronto Constable and I AM NOT BLAMING THE VICTIM, but I do think that with regards specifically to date rape or rape at a party (woman gets drunk at a party and some asshole takes her to his place and rapes her), provocative clothing might excite some latent predators and increase your chances of rape.
By "latent predator" - I mean the guy who is not a street rapist, but is a date rapist. He is not out on the street prowling for victims, but when he is on a date and the situation gets intimate and hot, he becomes very sexually aggressive and will not stop. He thinks all girls are "sluts" (specially the ones that dress like it) and that "no" really means "yes, take me". Many of these guys are "clean" looking, appear "normal", and are popular and "smooth" with women. There were guys like this at my college. (I learned about them talking to their victims.)
Again, I'm NOT BLAMING THE VICTIM, no woman is "asking" to be raped, even if she's running around completely naked or giving guys on the street free lap dances. But, as you women in the industry know - certain situations, unfortunately, do increase your chances of coming face-to-face with a sexual predator.
Did I stress that I AM NOT BLAMING THE VICTIM... (Certain instigators on this forum will do their best to argue that I am.) If I go out at night to an ATM machine, this might increase my chances of being mugged, but I have every right to visit the ATM machine whenever I need to or want to. Likewise, a woman has every right to dress as she pleases (within the limits of the law).
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Re: If you don't want to be raped, don't dress like a slut!
You ARE blaming the victim. Any time what the woman was wearing even gets mentioned it is blaming the victim because it should not fucking matter one tiny bit.
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Re: If you don't want to be raped, don't dress like a slut!
Thank you for bringing our attention to this. It makes me sick that in 2011 this man is on the front line with victims of sexual assault. I wonder how his attitude has affected victims and their decisions on reporting crimes or getting treatment? Rape is extremely under reported and time is crucial in collecting evidence and prosecuting the criminal. Much like child molesters, rapists are not usually even brought to any form of trial until after 10 victims.(Many believe this is on low range but 10 victims is average # found through investigation by the prosecution during trial prep)
It is absolute ignorance to try to marginalize rape into a crime based on sexual desire or the victims clothes/lifestyle.
I think is comes down to this foolish diluted hypothesis that seems to prevail in or society; based on the assumption that bad things happen to bad people and good things happen to good people.
This makes no sense because, for a lack of a better description, a variety of people are raped. Rape victims range in age, sex/gender, race and class. And obviously not everyone who has ever been raped has been drunk or wearing shorts skirts, heels, or anything else that translates into “asking for it.”
What happens if you applied that logic to other crimes?
Your car got stolen? What were you thinking driving in a such a shitty neighborhood?
Your house was broken into? Well that’s what you get for not having a burglar alarm.
You were robbed? Well you were just asking for it by dressing really flashy.
We blame the victim, so we can distance ourselves from the possibility of bad things ever happening to us. It can never happen to us because we’re smart, we follow the rules, we know better.
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Re: If you don't want to be raped, don't dress like a slut!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Trem
You ARE blaming the victim. Any time what the woman was wearing even gets mentioned it is blaming the victim because it should not fucking matter one tiny bit.
This attitude simply encourages us to ignore dangerous behavior that should be addressed NOT in a blaming manner, but one of caution for others. Certain actions increases the danger level we put ourselves in, and that can be in regards to robbery, assault and rape. It's not pretty to talk about, but it's the truth. Now certainly I think clothing is way down the list as far as things that increase your danger level, but I do think it can bring you undue attention.
This attitude reinforces the idea that you can do nothing to protect yourself.
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Re: If you don't want to be raped, don't dress like a slut!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
jack0177057
...provocative clothing might excite some latent predators and increase your chances of rape.
Oh my god, is that you, Camille Paglia?
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Re: If you don't want to be raped, don't dress like a slut!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
jester214
This attitude simply encourages us to ignore dangerous behavior that should be addressed NOT in a blaming manner, but one of caution for others. Certain actions increases the danger level we put ourselves in, and that can be in regards to robbery, assault and rape. It's not pretty to talk about, but it's the truth. Now certainly I think clothing is way down the list as far as things that increase your danger level, but I do think it can bring you undue attention.
This attitude reinforces the idea that you can do nothing to protect yourself.
The attitude that women should watch what they wear in order to not get raped ends up with them covered from head to toe with a burka and not allowed to be alone with males that aren't their family.
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Re: If you don't want to be raped, don't dress like a slut!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Trem
The attitude that women should watch what they wear in order to not get raped ends up with them covered from head to toe with a burka and not allowed to be alone with males that aren't their family.
You're blindly emotional and thus missing the point, which is the problem. People are so frightened by the suggestion that they are "blaming the victim" that we don't address dangerous actions, which is tantamount to encouraging it. You're getting hung up on dress, which I already said is way down the list.
Some guy gets robbed after hours in a dangerous part of town while he's drunk off his ass flashing cash, and we don't react like the same way, because... It's an emotional topic.
I would never tell a woman how to dress, but I have no qualms about telling them "When you're out on the town looking smoking hot, you are gonna get more attention than when you wear your sweats, be mindful of that and be safe". I refuse to beleive that's somehow wrong.
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Re: If you don't want to be raped, don't dress like a slut!
^ The problem with that argument is that it doesn't really matter what a woman wears, she still could face street harrassment and/or rape in sweats just the same as in a dress.
I see what you are trying to say, but it does blame the victim. And since telling women to be careful of what they wear doesn't actually stop rape, it hurts more than it helps.
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Re: If you don't want to be raped, don't dress like a slut!
The fact that we're still having this argument in the 21st century disgusts me. I don't see how these people don't understand that bringing dress into the debate IS blaming the victim, because it's saying that by dressing "slutty," the victim is partially, if not completely, responsible for the crime. And why would any man be okay with this argument? It's basically saying that some men are incapable of controlling their "baser urges" and when they see some hot chick dressed in sexy clothes, they can't help raping her. Really? REALLY? I mean, I know a lot of men can't keep it in their pants, but seriously, that has nothing to do with rape. When men bring up this argument, I assume that they themselves have that reaction--that when they see a hot chick in the mall, they're like, "Oh, man, that skirt is so short I should follow her to her car and rape her." Because I seriously cannot understand why ANYBODY, male or female, would believe this argument about "slutty" clothing and rape.
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Re: If you don't want to be raped, don't dress like a slut!
I guess every1 including children at the nudist communities are just asking to be raped being they are naked all the time everywhere. However I do suppose they are not dressed slutty which I don't know what that means anymore now that it's popular for every other girl of the age of 13 and up pretty much dresses that way. So that must give rapist a free pass on every other girl 13 & up if we follow that logic.
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Re: If you don't want to be raped, don't dress like a slut!
Firemaiden beat me to my point.
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Re: If you don't want to be raped, don't dress like a slut!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
sierra.
^ The problem with that argument is that it doesn't really matter what a woman wears, she still could face street harrassment and/or rape in sweats just the same as in a dress.
I see what you are trying to say, but it does blame the victim. And since telling women to be careful of what they wear doesn't actually stop rape, it hurts more than it helps.
I can get murdered everywhere. People of all ages, sexes and races get murdered. No matter what I do I can be murdered. But if I run through certain parts of Baltimore at 3AM shouting racial slurs, the chances increase.
I think being cautious of the attention your getting, the situation your in, and your state of mind could, and certainly have, help protect from rape.
What is being said over and over here is "it's gonna happen, you can't avoid it, it happens to anyone anywhere" which translates to "you can't stop it, so why even try?". That's dangerous.
There's a difference between showcasing dangerous behavior and blaming people. Sadly some people can't accept that and would rather sweep it all under the rug.
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Re: If you don't want to be raped, don't dress like a slut!
The confusion is that if I say something increases your risk of being a victim - some people interpret that to mean that I am saying - "If you do that, you are 'asking' to be a victim." THAT IS NOT THE CASE.
A lot of choices we make increase certain risks, but we still have the right to make those choices, and no one should victimize us because of the choices we make.
Saying something increases your risks of something bad, does not mean that I am blaming you for exercising your right to do that thing. Nor does it mean you shouldn't do it.
For example:
1) Playing sports increases your chances of a knee injury - but, I am not suggesting that people who play sports deserve a knee injury, nor am I blaming them for the knee injury.
2) Getting money out of an ATM machine at night increases your chances of being mugged - but, I am not suggesting people shouldn't get money from an ATM machine at night, nor am I suggesting that if you do, you deserve to be mugged.
3) Driving a nice car increases your chances of being carjacked - but, I am not suggesting that people should only drive ugly old cars, nor am I suggesting that if you drive a nice car, you deserve to be carjacked.
4) Going out at night (to a party, club, bar, visit a friend etc.) increases your chances of being mugged or raped - but, I am not suggesting people shouldn't ever go out at night, nor I am suggesting that by merely going out at night, you deserve to be mugged or raped.
5) Many occupations have hazards and increase your risks of certain calamities (e.g., policeman getting shot by criminal, criminal lawyers getting shot by their clients, bankers getting shot by a bank robber, doctor or nurse getting infected with AIDS from a patient, etc.) - but, I am not suggesting people shouldn't ever choose these occupations, nor I am suggesting that by choosing such an occupation, you deserve the tragedy that befalls you.
People who blame the victim are ignorant, but it is also ignorant to say I am blaming the victim merely because I am pointing out that provocative dressing may increase your risks of unwanted attention from a sexual predator. Many things we do (and that we have every right to do) involve risks - risks have to be understood and managed. I am not saying we should live in fear, terrorized by criminals, and avoiding all risks - by locking ourselves up at home and never leaving. (Even then, you are increasing your chances of a home accident.)
Dress provocatively, by all means - I love the sight of women in tight little blouses that expose cleavage, mini skirts and high heels. Just be aware of the increased risks and manage them accordingly.
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Re: If you don't want to be raped, don't dress like a slut!
Carrying a gun & shooting any baster that comes to close giving me unwanted sexual attention is my rape solution if dressing slutty attracts them to me becuz I like dressing the way I like & if that means I shoot a bunch of guys with rapist mentality well so be it. Honestly women should not need to have body guards & guns just be feel free to wear whatever they want. Rapist should just be shot in the nuts. Most men can just learn to control their hormones when they see female flesh instead of acting like they have some right to force a girl into sex over how she is dressed.
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Re: If you don't want to be raped, don't dress like a slut!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
UV69
Carrying a gun & shooting any baster that comes to close giving me unwanted sexual attention is my rape solution...
You should totally read Baise-Moi. Or at least see the movie.
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Re: If you don't want to be raped, don't dress like a slut!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
jack0177057
The confusion is that if I say something increases your risk of being a victim - some people interpret that to mean that I am saying - "If you do that, you are 'asking' to be a victim." THAT IS NOT THE CASE.
A lot of choices we make increase certain risks, but we still have the right to make those choices, and no one should victimize us because of the choices we make.
Saying something increases your risks of something bad, does not mean that I am blaming you for exercising your right to do that thing. Nor does it mean you shouldn't do it.
For example:
1) Playing sports increases your chances of a knee injury - but, I am not suggesting that people who play sports deserve a knee injury, nor am I blaming them for the knee injury.
2) Getting money out of an ATM machine at night increases your chances of being mugged - but, I am not suggesting people shouldn't get money from an ATM machine at night, nor am I suggesting that if you do, you deserve to be mugged.
3) Driving a nice car increases your chances of being carjacked - but, I am not suggesting that people should only drive ugly old cars, nor am I suggesting that if you drive a nice car, you deserve to be carjacked.
4) Going out at night (to a party, club, bar, visit a friend etc.) increases your chances of being mugged or raped - but, I am not suggesting people shouldn't ever go out at night, nor I am suggesting that by merely going out at night, you deserve to be mugged or raped.
5) Many occupations have hazards and increase your risks of certain calamities (e.g., policeman getting shot by criminal, criminal lawyers getting shot by their clients, bankers getting shot by a bank robber, doctor or nurse getting infected with AIDS from a patient, etc.) - but, I am not suggesting people shouldn't ever choose these occupations, nor I am suggesting that by choosing such an occupation, you deserve the tragedy that befalls you.
People who blame the victim are ignorant, but it is also ignorant to say I am blaming the victim merely because I am pointing out that provocative dressing may increase your risks of unwanted attention from a sexual predator. Many things we do (and that we have every right to do) involve risks - risks have to be understood and managed. I am not saying we should live in fear, terrorized by criminals, and avoiding all risks - by locking ourselves up at home and never leaving. (Even then, you are increasing your chances of a home accident.)
Dress provocatively, by all means - I love the sight of women in tight little blouses that expose cleavage, mini skirts and high heels. Just be aware of the increased risks and manage them accordingly.
If you are not suggesting any of those things then why the fuck even mention them at all? if "will this get me raped" should play no consideration when women chose their outfits then why the fuck are we still talking about it? seriously, we get it, you think looking hot increases your chances of having some neanderthal shoving his dick in you, great job sherlock now shut the fuck up.
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Re: If you don't want to be raped, don't dress like a slut!
I agree with Jester about the latent predator and and jack about making decisions that increase risk/danger levels. I also agree that some rapists do not target women based on their style of dress, and that a woman wearing regular clothes can still be targeted and raped. Both of these are interesting points, and they are not mutually exclusive. You can accept one without rejecting the other. It looks like Jester's suggestion may be effective against a specific predatory psychology, and relatively ineffective against another. I think the advice is still potentially helpful, but should not be seen as the only solution to the problem. The victims should always be empathized with, because anybody can be victimized by the right predator. But you can still take precautions that lessen your chances of being victimized, and that is true in almost any situation. I think this is what Jester and Jack pointed out.