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Mistakes we have all made
I'm in a good mood tonight so I thought I'd share some of the mistakes I've made when I first started dancing. Ladies, feel free to add more.
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Wearing payless shoes. These are NOT sexy. Go to an adult store, a strip club store (many clubs have these) or ebay to find a sexy pair of dancer heels. I recommend at least 5 inches, clear, or white.
Not using baby wipes after every trip to the bathroom. Dont use toilet paper at work unless you want bits of it to be stuck to your labia and butt.
Not upselling enough. Try to upsell as much as your club and the laws of your city/state allow.
If a customer wants a topless dance, ask him if he wants a nude.
If he wants a nude, ask him if he wants an extra naughty dance for a $20 tip (if this is allowed/legal in your club, of course)
If he wants a nude, ask him if he wants to upgrade to chamapgne
If you do a champagne, ask him if he wants to do another half hour or an hour.
After you are dancing tell him "this is how much you owe, plus whatever you wanna tip."
Worrying about stage shows and pole tricks. Don't worry how you look on stage, its all about how good you make the guys feel when you talk to them and how good your lap dances are.
Thinking that the natural new girl look is enough to make you good money. Yes I do agree that some girls can rock this look but its also wise to experiment and invest in things like: acrylic nails, tan, hair highlights, hair extensions, new costumes, wigs, costume jewelry, teeth bleaching, new diet, working out, etc. try it all and see what works! its usually pretty fun even.
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Re: Mistakes we have all made
Probably the biggest mistake I made was getting caught up in the drama at clubs. This can be as simple as becoming friends with another dancer who does cause trouble. I learned not to become friends with most dancers.
Also, it's important to wear a flattering style for your bodytype. Not every style works for everyone.
Most importantly, never take rejection personally. Just because a customer isn't attracted to you it doesn't mean you won't be unattractive to everyone.
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Re: Mistakes we have all made
My biggest mistake was treating tipping like I were a waitress. I honestly thought it was rude to ask for tips, and that it was a given that they'd just hand them over at the end of the dance. Also, the honor system. I got fucked over a lot in those first few shifts.
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Re: Mistakes we have all made
I was very naive when I first started dancing and couldn't believe that people would try to run out without paying me for a lapdance. They would grab me inappropriately and treat me like an object. They would give me counterfeit bills. They would try to steal money out of my garter. They would solicit me for sex even after I said I wouldn't go out with them. The exhaustive list goes on and on...
I mean who does that right? I was just so green to the business and I gave everyone the benefit of the doubt and always thought the best of every customer that came in.
NOW, oh hell no I'm di-militant, a walking ticking timebomb, and paranoid as f##k. I don't trust anyone and I command respect, less your a$$ be tossed out on the curb with the rest of the drunk and disorderly.
I'd like to think that I changed for the better, but, truthfully, I'm probably more crazy now then when I first started, oh well... :P
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Re: Mistakes we have all made
Lending stuff to other girls! I definitely lost a few fave things to that when I was a newb. And sitting with guys for far too long before realizing there wasn't a hope in hell they were planning to buy a dance.
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Re: Mistakes we have all made
Thinking I hadto get drunk to make money (drinking a bottle ofwine before even going in and then spending 2 or 3 hours going round just looking for people to buy me drinks!!)
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Re: Mistakes we have all made
Sitting with a customer after he buys a couple dances and not going away. One of the first guys I ever danced with gave me a lot of money but told me he didn't want any more dances. I sat with him for a long time anyway and kept asking every 10 mins or so. He finally got mad and asked what my problem was? I told him I was new and asked was I doing it wrong. He laughed, tipped me and then explained how girls excuse themselves politely to give the guy space to spend on other girls or rest up for more dances later.
Trusting other girls with info, outfits, or loans.
Hanging out with girls who are problems to the point where when you work and she doesn't everyone asks you about her like you are her keeper. Or complains to you about her or asks you to "talk to your friend please."
Believing every guy who says he's coming back to see me.
Believing everything guys say about other girls. Didn't know sometimes grown men just like to start shit.
Not being aggressive enough in selling my dances.
Being too nice to everyone. Trying to help everyone.
Listening to girls who aren't trying to change their situation complain to me and getting involved/helping then watching them go right back to boyfriend/pimp/drugs.
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Re: Mistakes we have all made
Not sticking up for myself. I am too nice and passive, and people sense that and walked all over me. Not anymore! It took a while, but now I can be more assertive.
Worrying too much about my stage show. I have now learned I make my money selling dances, while some girls make a lot on stage. Everyone is different.
Learning what outfits I like and look good me versus what doesn't. I used to wear whatever and have learned now what looks good.
Thankfully, I had stripperweb since day One and didn't have to worry to much about mistakes, since I learned vicariously from here!
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Re: Mistakes we have all made
On my first night, one of the stage managers was like "have you ever done a lap dance before?" And I of course said no. So he said we'd go in the back and he'd show me how to do it. I was so naive and thought he was genuinely trying to help me but in reality he just wanted to grope me. Like the next day after that this bouncer asked me to do a lap dance, and then he didn't pay me. Then I asked one of the experienced girls if that stuff was normal and she said no. So moral of the story, when you're new at the club don't let yourself be taken advantage of. Keep managers at a professional distance and (in the type of clubs that I work in at least) you have no reason to even speak to the bouncers unless there's a problem that they need to fix.
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Re: Mistakes we have all made
^^I gave my first dance to the manager of a club, although he didn't touch me and demonstrated the moves on me first (that part was hilarious). A little shady maybe, but after that I was basically a pro!
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Re: Mistakes we have all made
Quote:
Originally Posted by
lol1337a
My biggest mistake was treating tipping like I were a waitress. I honestly thought it was rude to ask for tips, and that it was a given that they'd just hand them over at the end of the dance. Also, the honor system. I got fucked over a lot in those first few shifts.
Agreed, I was initially too shy to really outright ask for money...I was raised in an area where bringing up money in public was a HUGE faux pas and extremely rude, and it was hard for me to get out of the habit.
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Re: Mistakes we have all made
Thinking that VIP or dances are too expensive. When I started dancing, I had no idea how or why anyone would buy an $800 VIP room to spend time with *me* -- or hell, anyone for that matter. I thought it was a total waste of time to even ask. I also felt guilty about asking guys to do strings of dances, until I realized that almost everyone has a credit card, and if they're in a strip club, they WANT a hot woman gyrating all over them, no matter what the price. I really just had no idea how much $$$ men were willing to spend to see naked girls.
Dancing too quickly on stage. It always looks sexy when you dance slowly and fluidly. It's much harder to dance fast and look sexy. Men don't necessarily want a *show*, they just want to get a boner.
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Re: Mistakes we have all made
i see a trend here.
being too nice
not charging my worth
being too trusting
not pushing enough
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Re: Mistakes we have all made
Sitting at the bar because I was too nervous to approach customers
Not interacting with the customers when I was on stage- I would be dancing on the pole and if a customer came up I would walk over, hold out my garter, say thanks and walk away instead of joking around with them, asking if they want a dance when i get off stage, introducing myself, etc
sticking to one type of line, hustle, etc. the young college guys are going to be in party mode compared to the older business men who are lonely
sitting with guys and not hustling because i felt bad because they were pouring their heart out to me
not approaching all the customers. i would only approach the ones that i thought had money and missed out on a lot of big spenders because they were not in business suits
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Re: Mistakes we have all made
X 1000 what Elusive said. It's easier to keep making money off of a guy than start from scratch with a new prospect on the floor.
Time-wasters. if a guy is like, ya ya I'll take care of you, we'll do dances later, blab, blab, ya ya soon, let me finish my drink, blah blah FUCK THAT noise I'm out. These guys do it on purpose and get off on getting your time and attention and not paying for it.
Do a search for the time waster thread for more on this.
Putting up with a grabby guy because I thought i had to to make money. There is always another guy, or another night. Work enough so you do not fall prey to these vile creeps.
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Re: Mistakes we have all made
Thinking a stage show is merely to impress people with wicked pole tricks. Do them if you want, and I do feel that a few unusual tricks set my stage show apart and get me more tips, but what really pays off is eye contact and a smile.
I need to take breaks at work for my sanity, but the nights I do the best are nights I'm out there working the crowd, approaching as many people as I need to to get that YES.
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Re: Mistakes we have all made
Stacking more than 5 dances without getting paid. It's a risk ladies! Unless you know the guy or he goes to the ATM first, you take a chance when you do this.
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Re: Mistakes we have all made
Good to know there are a bunch of common mistakes we have all made:D
-Being too shy to talk to customers/ waiting for them to just come to me
-Riding off of my stage shows
-Assuming that every guy in there is a douchebag
-Drinkng too much
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Re: Mistakes we have all made
Thank you so much to everyone who posted in this thread. As a new girl, I really appreciate all the advice.
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Re: Mistakes we have all made
I agree with what a lot of you have already posted.
-Being too nice
-Not trying hard enough, just accepting no right away or not coming back later when asked to come back later.
-Definitely drinking too much and using work as my "party place". Rather than actually trying to make money.
-Being too shy/nervous to talk to guys, thinking I'm not their type, they won't like me
Definitely going to do things differently when I return to work. :)
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Re: Mistakes we have all made
The mistake that I made the most in the beginning was letting guys waste my time. Sitting with dudes for everrrrr and not mentioning dances ... no good.
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Re: Mistakes we have all made
Taking other girls into rooms with me and a very good customer...in the end they will usually try to steal them from you (even when there is no reason to because he spends endless amounts of money and you think they are trustworthy). There is something to being protective of regulars/customers, it is an art tho.
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Re: Mistakes we have all made
-being too nice. helping out other girls. they never return the favor or they steal your customer.
-GIving guys free peaks so they will buy a dance.
-Letting guys waste our time.
-Taking advice from girls who clearly didn't know what they were doing.
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Re: Mistakes we have all made
Getting hassled for sex, trying to grope me, asking for my phone number etc. because I was trying not to say an outright "no" and walk away. Spending too much time trying to sell to these guys thinking "they want my phone number so they must like me". Nope, they just want something for nothing.
Just saying "thank you" at the end of a dance instead of upselling. Then just saying "wanna keep going?" in an unsexy way instead of sitting on their lap whispering in their ear that we should stay and have more fun.
Not knowing what to do when a customer tried to touch me, just awkwardly saying "uh... you can't do that" instead of "put you're hands behind your back, do that again your dance is over, no refunds". Or just walk out if it's a full on grope.
Being shy about asking for money, when I was new £10 for a 3 min dance seemed like soooo much.
Thinking that them buying a dance off me was doing me a favour instead of me getting naked for them is doing them an honour.
Man I made a lot of mistakes, sometimes I wonder how I survived those first few months...
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Re: Mistakes we have all made
Not investing the time to learn about hair and makeup and whatnot. When I started dancing the only makeup I owned was a tube of mascara and a concealer stick. I didn't own a blowdryer, much less any styling tools. I thought makeup looked tacky. I made/scavenged my own outfits because I never spent money on clothes in real life, so why would I at work? When I started the only spenders I got had a crush on a punk girl in highschool or something like that. Now I'm a drag-queen version of Marilyn Monroe.
Sometimes agreeing to meet customers at the casino/their hotel/a bar after work. I wasn't sure where the stripper/whore line was and on which side of it I wanted to be.
Doing drugs with customers. Thinking nobody notices when your champagne room keeps asking for bottles of water. Having to explain to your manager that you have to hide in the bathroom because you accidentally did angel dust.
Wow, I used to be one of those girls everyone here complains about!