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"Would you like to buy the lady a drink?"
This question at a strip club stresses me out, and here's why...
I don't mind buying a drink for a stripper. In fact, I like doing so, in theory. HOWEVER...I've been burned too many times to be able to just say yes. In fact, I remember the VERY FIRST TIME this question was asked of me, and I said "sure!"
The girl ordered a $14 champagne drink. And this was in the early 90s. $14 back then is probably about $20 now.
I hate to sound like a cheap ass, but really?
That wasn't the only time this has happened, and now I'm gunshy.
Or maybe I AM cheap...but I just feel taken advantage of when something like that happens...
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Re: "Would you like to buy the lady a drink?"
I know I'm not a Blue but I have to agree with you and say that this question makes me, as a dancer, uncomfortable. We have this one waitress that is a hustler when it comes to selling drinks. As soon as she sees a girl sit down she runs over and asks, 'Would you like to buy the lady a drink?" #1 if he says "no" it's a bit awkward afterwards.. but I do understand him saying "no" but I'm weird and feel like I'm unwanted even if that's not the case. #2 I feel like he thinks I'm in on something with the waitress and am trying to take all his money right away. #3 Most of the time I'd rather he save the money for dances. #4 It is a rule that we HAVE to finish the whole goddamn drink before we can move on. #5 She's kind of ruining my hustle. I want to be the one that asks him for something first. A simple "Can I get you anything else?" is a much better approach, IMO..
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Re: "Would you like to buy the lady a drink?"
Yeah. From a customer standpoint, pushy waitresses are annoying as hell.
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Re: "Would you like to buy the lady a drink?"
Quote:
Originally Posted by
kaiarose
I know I'm not a Blue but I have to agree with you and say that this question makes me, as a dancer, uncomfortable.
#4 It is a rule that we HAVE to finish the whole goddamn drink before we can move on.
Yes..in general it can make for uncomfortable moments. I usually sit by the bar and they have a pretty good idea of when to ask about drinks. If it is someone I don't want to buy a drink for I just mention I am on a budget and need to save my money for the lady I came in to see. Otherwise, it can end up being a parade up to the customer once the dancers find out who is willing to buy drinks for anyone. I am always good for a drink if it is someone I have a history with...but yes...have to agree with being annoyed with expensive drinks or when they order doubles.
#4 ?? So, if I make it across the little pond between us and line drinks up for ya.......that means you can never leave me??;) Would hate to break club rules;D
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Re: "Would you like to buy the lady a drink?"
^ What I meant by that is: If the guy and I just aren't clicking and I want to move on, I can't til I finish a drink. Plus, if it's a non alcoholic or even alcoholic drink a girl's tummy gets full fast. And we are NOT allowed to deny drinks either.. Make the trip across the pond first and then we'll talk about drinks ;)
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Re: "Would you like to buy the lady a drink?"
Quote:
Originally Posted by
kaiarose
^ What I meant by that is: If the guy and I just aren't clicking and I want to move on, I can't til I finish a drink. Plus, if it's a non alcoholic or even alcoholic drink a girl's tummy gets full fast. And we are NOT allowed to deny drinks either.. Make the trip across the pond first and then we'll talk about drinks ;)
I give you credit for feeling obliged to stay with the guy till your drink is finished. I've had girls who've left just a couple sips into the drink. I was already semi-familiar with them and subsequently never bought them another drink.
As far as the OP's question is concerned, I'd suggest you not sit with girls you don't intend to spend on but if she is someone you'll be spending on, make sure she at least considers the possibility that some of that drink money might eventually end up in her purse if it doesn't get spent recklessly. That being said, I generally don't get approached by waitresses because I seldom sit anywhere but the bar and only drink water anyhow.
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Re: "Would you like to buy the lady a drink?"
Just say no. Its not about the girl. I'd rather spend the money on her, not the bar.
Now, you want to talk about annoying, the shooter girl at Cheetah's in Vegas. I had to say no about every 10 minutes.
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Re: "Would you like to buy the lady a drink?"
There is only one club in my hunting grounds that pulls this crap. As soon as a dancer's butt hits the chair next to me, the waitress is there in a heartbeat with the "buy the lady a drink?" hustle. It wouldn't be so bad if said waitress at least left me alone for a bit afterwards. But sure enough, after I've danced with Dancer #1 and returned to my seat, Dancer #2 swoops in, followed closely behind by the aggressive waitress. This is repeated several more times as different dancers plop down beside me. That drink tab adds up quickly. I used to try and budget in this extra cost, but nowadays I avoid that club completely unless I'm in the general area. It's a shame, too, because I otherwise really like the club - the dancers there are friendly & attractive, and the dances themselves are cheap (at least by LA standards).
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Re: "Would you like to buy the lady a drink?"
Just say no thanks. Seriously, the waitress or barmaid is simply doing her job-she is supposed to sell liquor, even if there is no drink quota she is still expected to push drinks to a certain extent. I feel absolutely no obligation to spend money on a dancer who just sat down when the question was asked. I am very generous when it comes to buying drinks for my favs and even just on dancers I know but don't buy dances from as long as we are engaged in conversation.
Maybe it's because I started clubbing during the days of the old Boston Combat Zone heavy drink hustle but I have no problem refusing the request when it comes from a server or barmaid. My pet peeve of all time is when I've been sitting and being ignored by a server for ten or fifteen minutes only to have her come right over as soon as she sees a dancer sit down. Grrrr....
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Re: "Would you like to buy the lady a drink?"
Thankfully the clubs in my area that I patronize are BYOB.
Clubs that I have been to in other areas where the BTLAD question comes, I usually decline. I'd rather save my money for dances
I also don't buy: T-Shirts, calenders, hats, roses, or Teddy Bears
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Re: "Would you like to buy the lady a drink?"
If one wants to club in certain places then "dancer drinks" are just a reality.
Baltimore, Boston and Mobile immediately come to mind, though there are also a couple of clubs in Queens that sell $20 mini-champagnes from which the dancers get a cut.
I have mixed feelings about it. I don't like LDs, so the dancer drink thing can actually work out well with the right girl. However, in Beantown it gets absurd with $30 dancer drinks that these girls put down quickly. In Baltimore the drink prices range from $20-25 and the girls are under heavy pressure to finish quickly as the bartenders get a healthy cut of each drink, which is why the byob Player's Club (off the block) has become a favorite stop for me.
However, in Mobile, one club that I like offers 3 different drink options, at $20, 30 and 50. The $50 drink is a huge goblet, and when I last bought one for a dancer I liked it took her a solid hour to finish it. ;) Also, in a club in Queens that I visit from time to time, the dancer drinks are a much cheaper way of spending some time with a girl than the lapdances, which run at $40 per song during the evening hours.
To sum it up, for those of us who tip for time in lieu of LDs, dancer drinks can be a convenient way of spending time with a girl without her needing to move on quickly to sell a dance, but it can also get expensive.
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Re: "Would you like to buy the lady a drink?"
Quote:
Originally Posted by
rickdugan
in Beantown it gets absurd with $30 dancer drinks that these girls put down quickly.
LOL, nothing has changed much in Boston over the last 30 years other than the number of clubs! The first time I ever really felt "hustled" was at the old Naked I Cabaret 25 years ago when I bought a dancer a $25 champagne cocktail which she summarily downed in about three sips as she rubbed my leg and told me what a nice guy I was. Needless to say a waitress magically appeared every time my lady put down her empty glass. I mowed through $100 in about 20 minutes! As soon as I said "no" to the sixth drink the lady was gone like the wind!
That was a lot of money for me back then but her hand sure felt good on my leg...
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Re: "Would you like to buy the lady a drink?"
Quote:
Originally Posted by
yoda57us
LOL, nothing has changed much in Boston over the last 30 years other than the number of clubs! The first time I ever really felt "hustled" was at the old Naked I Cabaret 25 years ago when I bought a dancer a $25 champagne cocktail which she summarily downed in about three sips as she rubbed my leg and told me what a nice guy I was. Needless to say a waitress magically appeared every time my lady put down her empty glass. I mowed through $100 in about 20 minutes! As soon as I said "no" to the sixth drink the lady was gone like the wind!
That was a lot of money for me back then but her hand sure felt good on my leg...
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Was that your "3rd leg", yoda ?:D. Your scenario similar to my "potted plant incident" mentioned in 1 of my blogs on Miami clubs. That cured me of any desire to patronize a club heavy in drink hustle.
No, Mr. Hyde, wanting value for your $$ does not make you a cheapskate. IMO, spending a Benjamin or 2/hr on drinks is analogous to someone buying an expensive sports car just to sit in driveway without exercising its capabilities on the open road, or racetrack.
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Re: "Would you like to buy the lady a drink?"
Quote:
Originally Posted by
yoda57us
LOL, nothing has changed much in Boston over the last 30 years other than the number of clubs! The first time I ever really felt "hustled" was at the old Naked I Cabaret 25 years ago when I bought a dancer a $25 champagne cocktail which she summarily downed in about three sips as she rubbed my leg and told me what a nice guy I was. Needless to say a waitress magically appeared every time my lady put down her empty glass. I mowed through $100 in about 20 minutes! As soon as I said "no" to the sixth drink the lady was gone like the wind!
That was a lot of money for me back then but her hand sure felt good on my leg...
LOL. It is downright painful to club in Boston, but I sometimes drop into the Slipper when I'm there on business.
I came into clubbing at the tail end of the Combat Zone era, when Boston had already cleaned up a lot of that area and was pushing out the remaining holdouts. I remember visiting the Naked I a couple of times shortly before it was closed down, but my memories consisted of naked pigs and expensive drinks in very small glasses. I think that by the time I visited the club in the mid-90s it was in its death throws.
Now, as you know, what is left in Boston are two clubs that are not really worth visiting.
Heck, much the same can be said for virtually every club in Eastern MA, though I will admit that it has been over 5 years since I have been to the Golden Banana, Foxy (Brockton), Alex's, Squire, etc. If I am roaming the area outside of Boston, I'm much more likely to find my way down to Providence.
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Re: "Would you like to buy the lady a drink?"
Yeah, the mid 90's was just about the end of the line for the Combat Zone. The old clubs were closing and there were no more permits being issued for new ones. The Foxy Lady actually tried two or three times to open a club in Boston and was refused a liquor license. Centerfolds managed to get one by partnering with the old owners of the Naked I. Even at that it sat unopened for months while the city tried to deny and entertainment license. Is it any wonder the clubs in and around Boston are so lame?!
The Foxy in Brockton, Alex's and Mario's in Webster are all good clubs and are all in my rotation along with three or four clubs in RI. They are also not really in to the whole drink hustle so they are relaxing places to hang out. Alex's actually keeps track of how many a dancer has had-they don't want them drunk at work. My fav actually ordered an O'Dooles the last time I was in there!
I used to be a regular years ago at the Banana, Squire and the Cabaret Lounge but, honestly, they are all a bore and pretty much the only people who go to them are guys who have never been some place better or are too lazy to drive there...
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Re: "Would you like to buy the lady a drink?"
Quote:
Originally Posted by
minnow
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Was that your "3rd leg", yoda ?:D. Your scenario similar to my "potted plant incident" mentioned in 1 of my blogs on Miami clubs. That cured me of any desire to patronize a club heavy in drink hustle.
LOL, this was the 1980's in Boston. No one was rubbing the third leg though quite a few of the girls worked as hookers on the side. It was easier to get laid than it was to get stick-shifted...
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Re: "Would you like to buy the lady a drink?"
I actually used to have a couple of dancers I visited who kept the same brand of bottled water the club sold in their lockers and would bring me one when I showed up to have a drink with them. I never asked them to do it but they were the sharpest business women of my dancer friends. I guess they figured they'd take care of my drinks and I'd take care of theirs.
I also remember making one trip to the combat zone back in the '80's. They tried to charge me $8 for a tap water 2 or 3 hours into the visit.
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Re: "Would you like to buy the lady a drink?"
Quote:
Originally Posted by
kaiarose
^ What I meant by that is: If the guy and I just aren't clicking and I want to move on, I can't til I finish a drink. Plus, if it's a non alcoholic or even alcoholic drink a girl's tummy gets full fast. And we are NOT allowed to deny drinks either.. Make the trip across the pond first and then we'll talk about drinks ;)
Is that why you quit drinking on me early?
I think that I remember getting hit by a waitress immediately with the "buy the lady a drink?" line. Was that her? My eyes were hardly adjusted yet. The VIP waitresses, you really liked.
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Re: "Would you like to buy the lady a drink?"
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Redwolf
Is that why you quit drinking on me early?
I think that I remember getting hit by a waitress immediately with the "buy the lady a drink?" line. Was that her? My eyes were hardly adjusted yet. The VIP waitresses, you really liked.
LOL! No I quit on you early cuz I wouldn't have been able to walk out of there if I hadn't :P
And yes I believe that was her...LOL... The VIP waitress, Amber, is one of my favorite people there altogether :)
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Re: "Would you like to buy the lady a drink?"
UGH this annoys me so much as a dancer.. We really are not supposed to turn down drinks if they are offered, but most of the time, i dont want to feel obligated to sit around and wait for a drink i dont want!
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Re: "Would you like to buy the lady a drink?"
I personally hate this. The drink hustle at my club is still huge and we have $750 bottles of champagne to sell. As a bartender I get pushed hard to sell them and I hate hustling people like that. I can't imagine what the guys think.
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Re: "Would you like to buy the lady a drink?"
I thought being forced to drink is illegal? I can't think of any other place that require you to consume alcohol. Like what if someone buys you 15 shots or you bump into a dozen guys in a row- you just get wasted?
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Re: "Would you like to buy the lady a drink?"
Quote:
Originally Posted by
yyyrrrrtt
I thought being forced to drink is illegal? I can't think of any other place that require you to consume alcohol. Like what if someone buys you 15 shots or you bump into a dozen guys in a row- you just get wasted?
While most clubs will have a drink minimum it certainly doesn't have to be alcohol. As far as buying drinks for dancers well, no one is forcing you and again, no one says it has to be liquor.
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Re: "Would you like to buy the lady a drink?"
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Mr Hyde
You pretty much nailed it, but the one thing you miss is what I hit in my post...when you say "yes" and then she proceeds to order a $17 drink. Like, what the fuck?
Instead of just saying sure, you could turn to the dancer and ask "would you like a bud light?" or some other drink that you know to be reasonably priced.
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Re: "Would you like to buy the lady a drink?"
Quote:
Originally Posted by
rickdugan
If one wants to club in certain places then "dancer drinks" are just a reality.
Baltimore, Boston and Mobile immediately come to mind, though there are also a couple of clubs in Queens that sell $20 mini-champagnes from which the dancers get a cut.
I have mixed feelings about it. I don't like LDs, so the dancer drink thing can actually work out well with the right girl. However, in Beantown it gets absurd with $30 dancer drinks that these girls put down quickly. In Baltimore the drink prices range from $20-25 and the girls are under heavy pressure to finish quickly as the bartenders get a healthy cut of each drink, which is why the byob Player's Club (off the block) has become a favorite stop for me.
However, in Mobile, one club that I like offers 3 different drink options, at $20, 30 and 50. The $50 drink is a huge goblet, and when I last bought one for a dancer I liked it took her a solid hour to finish it. ;) Also, in a club in Queens that I visit from time to time, the dancer drinks are a much cheaper way of spending some time with a girl than the lapdances, which run at $40 per song during the evening hours.
To sum it up, for those of us who tip for time in lieu of LDs, dancer drinks can be a convenient way of spending time with a girl without her needing to move on quickly to sell a dance, but it can also get expensive.
$40 dances? Full nude? I wonder if the club gets a cut? What's the name of the club? ;D