Is the Glass Half Empty or Half Full?
Maybe it's just me, but it feels like perception on so many subjects are just so...negative and depressing lately. I feel like every post I reply to is this chin up, think positive, put good things out into the universe! type posts.
Found this lil thing and though I would share...hope you all get a kick out of it!
The optimist says the glass is half full.
The pessimist says the glass is half empty.
The project manager says the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
The cynic... wonders who drank the other half.
Attitude is not about whether the glass is half full or half empty, it's about who is paying for the next round.
The consultant says let's examine the question, prepare a strategy for an answer, and all for a daily rate of...
The worrier frets that the remaining half will evaporate by next morning.
The computer specialist says that next year the glass capacity will double, be half the price, but cost you 50% more.
The computer programmer says the glass is full-empty.
The Dutchman would suggest to both pay for the glass and share the content. Then tells you he will have the bottom half.
The grammarian says that while the terms half-full and half-empty are colloquially acceptable, the glass can technically be neither since both full and empty are absolute states and therefore are incapable of being halved or modified in any way.
The physician says that the glass is not empty at all - it is half-filled with water and half-filled with air - hence, fully filled on the whole!
The musician is unimpressed with the promoter for not providing more alcohol.
The research scientist says that following initial observation and testing a working hypothesis for further research is: "The glass is both half full and half empty," and that these findings warrant further investigation with a more representative sample of glasses and contents, which may or may not be liquid.
The 'perfect' housewife would not leave the glass sitting there long enough for anyone to consider the question, but would scoop it up, wash it up, dry it to a gleaming shine and put it back in the glass cabinet in a jiffy. No half-full or half-empty in her world... just a full glass or an untidy one.
The obsessive compulsive postpones the question until the level is checked, and checked again, and again, and again...
The phobic says yuck, someone drank out of it and left their germs on the glass.
The psychiatrist would ask you, "Is the half-empty/half-full glass really that important? Let's set that particular issue aside for a few moments and talk about what's really bothering you.."
The customer service agent will agree with you that the glass is half full/empty, and ask you to return the half full/empty glass at your own cost, with no guarantee of any refund.
The Taoist sees that the glass is both half empty and half full, that neither half could exist without the other, requiring a point of balance in order to maintain equilibrium in the universe, and therefore, are merely two mirror images of the same realistic concept, so in the purity of absolute truth the glass is neither half full or half empty, the glass simply IS...
Re: Is the Glass Half Empty or Half Full?
Re: Is the Glass Half Empty or Half Full?
so the question is how does the stripper and the cam girl look at it?? :P
Re: Is the Glass Half Empty or Half Full?
The stripper says : Did I drink all that or did the bartender short me
The camgirl says: I wish I could climb in the glass and pose in it
I agree 100% there is a lot of negativity right now. Try to embrace an attitude of gratitude for every dollar you earn, every beautiful sunset, etc. It makes life sweet and restores perspective. Time is but a concept. Life is in fact eternal.
Re: Is the Glass Half Empty or Half Full?
I was thinking the same thing! The gears in my brain are already turning trying to think of something!!!
The stripper says...
The cam girl says...
The escort says...
Any ideas anyone? This could be fun lol
Re: Is the Glass Half Empty or Half Full?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Optimist
The stripper says : Did I drink all that or did the bartender short me
The camgirl says: I wish I could climb in the glass and pose in it
I agree 100% there is a lot of negativity right now. Try to embrace an attitude of gratitude for every dollar you earn, every beautiful sunset, etc. It makes life sweet and restores perspective. Time is but a concept. Life is in fact eternal.
Yay you were posting same time as me! Hehehe!!
And yes...you are *so*right....we are making our mark in this life...when our time does come to an end..more than anything, we will be remembered for our attitude, how we made others feel, how we made our mark...thats how we live on... And I want mine to live on in good vibes, good feelings, and "I just cant help myself" smiles ;D
Re: Is the Glass Half Empty or Half Full?
Okay heres one!
The escort says, I dont care if its GHF or GHE...either way you only get one cup.
Re: Is the Glass Half Empty or Half Full?
Awe! Thanks so much!!! ;D
Ooh heres another one! LoL
All the stripper knows is...if she sees any dancers with a full glass, shes going to report those extras girls and get them out of there!
The cam girl is busy hitting refresh after every glass viewing to see if the amount went up or not....then posts threads in SW wondering if its slow for anyone else and find out if theres progress on any other cups out there.
Re: Is the Glass Half Empty or Half Full?
The Desu briefly thought about it. Then she decided conclusion she came to was likely to be depressing and offputting so threw the glass in the sink and went back to the internet.
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The customer...
"What do I get if I buy the half-full glass, can I get a discount because it's not full, and how much is it? Why is it more expensive than the half-empty glass? Can I get three half-empty glasses for the price of a half full glass? Why can't I drink from the half full glass, I won't tell the manager. Can I see the half-empty glass in the sink first? Ehh, maybe later."
Re: Is the Glass Half Empty or Half Full?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
lestat1
The customer...
"What do I get if I buy the half-full glass, can I get a discount because it's not full, and how much is it? Why is it more expensive than the half-empty glass? Can I get three half-empty glasses for the price of a half full glass? Why can't I drink from the half full glass, I won't tell the manager. Can I see the half-empty glass in the sink first? Ehh, maybe later."
Another customer...
"Half full glass? Plenty of room for a roofie"
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Yet another customer...he just wants to know...hands glass bb?