Don't take no for an answer
How do you not take no for an answer when you ask someone for a dance, and they either say no flat out or, or give you an excuse for "maybe later"? What do you specifically do or say, to change their minds or convince them otherwise? Any and all advice helps. Thank you ladies! :)
Re: Don't take no for an answer
this seems like a lot of effort that could be going into another customer.
Re: Don't take no for an answer
^Yeah. It's one thing to make a playful last ditch comment to try and entice him for dances as you're getting up to leave, but don't be one of those girls that sits with a customer until he finally and begrudgingly gives in and takes you for a dance. If he says maybe later, by all means, go back after a while has passed or if he beckons you towards him later on, but don't camp out with him to try and turn a no into a yes. Sometimes, you're just not what they're looking for and you've got to accept that and move on to better customers.
Re: Don't take no for an answer
I don't know, I don't tend to agree with that, *SOMETIMES* yes no means definite no, but not always.
I've had guys tell me that they no way want a dance and I've then said okay fair enough and conversed with them for a bit and they change their mind.
Re: Don't take no for an answer
^^Me too. No does not always mean no. When I worked day shifts in LA there often were no other customers to talk to as it was slow and there were many dancers. Our goal was to get guys into the VIP(nude) as they really didn't do too many topless dances at this club. There were lots of times when no meant no but Zig Ziglar says that a no does not mean no and with nothing else better to do, I'd keep the conversation rolling. Maybe I'd make it a little sexier, get a little closer, start talking slower, and wouldn't you believe that I got enough guys to change their mind that I KNOW it can sometimes work. Feel the guy out. Is he saying no because that's his automatic answer to all girls who ask? Did he say no because you didn't talk long enough and he doesn't feel rapport with you? Maybe he said no because he just got there.
Long story short, some can be flipped to yes. Just judge for yourself if you can make the time commitment it sometimes takes.
Re: Don't take no for an answer
^^ I agree. I don't know how long you've been dancing, but you eventually can tell from the "Hi, how are you?" if they're interested or not.
If they say "No," they mean it. Walk away, but BE NICE, because you never know, that no could turn into a yes in half an hour. I always try back unless someone was rude to me or specifically said that I'm not their type.
If they say "Maybe later" or some variation of that, I typically try one more line. My club is $10 LD's and then VIP's, and of course, all the girls try to sell VIP's, so they don't always tell the customer that we have LD's. If someone says "Maybe later," I'll usually say "Well, it's only $10," and about half the time they'll say "Oh, ok!" and get a $10 LD. Then about 9/10 I get a VIP out of them after the LD.
If I've given an LD, and they say "Maybe later" for a VIP, I'll usually explain that I'll probably be busy later, and if they want to go, they should do it now, while they know I'm available and can have me all to themselves. Of course, explain this in a cute, flirtatious way, not in a way that seems rude or like you're threatening them.
All in all, you really need to gauge the situation, and don't sound desperate. You're just embarrassing yourself, and you'll NEVER get a dance from that person if you come off that way.
Re: Don't take no for an answer
Sometimes the smartest hustling technique is to know when to walk away. If it's dead, I understand continuing to try to work on a guy in a more gentle way, getting him to like you and change his mind. But if the club is busy, go to someone else. The time you spend trying to change one guy's mind could be better spent getting dances from 5 guys who absolutely want a dance from you. If you have extra time later, you can always go back then. But don't waste your time trying to figure out every single guy. It actually makes you more money to leave the difficult ones behind rather than miss out on the easy ones because you insist on getting a yes out of everyone. I watched a girl spend over 2 hours one night trying to get a dance out of this one guy. It was certainly not dead - she just didn't want to give up. He eventually bought one dance and then bitched at me about her when I wandered over to him. Was that $15 for 2 hours of whining and begging really worth it, especially since she basically guaranteed that guy would not want to spend on her annoying ass again? This girl constantly complained in the DR about how few dances she got each night... probably because she just didn't know when to move on and "take no for an answer."
You can always make a last-ditch attempt when someone says "later" like, "But someone might snatch me up and then you won't be able to find me later!" or "But I'm sooo ready to go now!" But if they keep saying no, walk away gracefully. Whenever I tried to keep the sales pitch going on a lost cause, it very quickly started sounding like whining and bitching. You don't want to go there.
Re: Don't take no for an answer
Well I'll tell you what you don't want to do and that is to ask "Why not?"
I've turned "I'm broke." and "I'm not interested." into twenty plus lap dances before.
I've also heard this: "How come 15 girls have asked me for a dance and I've told them no but I'm going to the VIP with you?"
So it's totally possible to turn NO into lots of yes's.
Re: Don't take no for an answer
I smile, tell them to enjoy their evening, remind them of my name, and then grab another guy to dance with.
Re: Don't take no for an answer
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Originally Posted by
Aurora_Sunset
Sometimes the smartest hustling technique is to know when to walk away ... I watched a girl spend over 2 hours one night trying to get a dance out of this one guy. It was certainly not dead - she just didn't want to give up.
There's a couple of girls at my club that do exactly this! It's just plain annoying - not just for the customer but for the other dancers as well.
Re: Don't take no for an answer
+1 BringOnTheMen. Seems like stripperhacks is always bragging about how much money she makes but she never gives the science behind it.
Anyhow, if a customer says no to me I will generally move on to the next guy. If he says "maybe later" then I will come back, but if he doesn't make eye contact with me, mumbles, doesn't shake my hand AND says no then I don't return to his table that day.
I will sit with customers for the first 1-2 hours of my shift when there are only a few guys ITC. I'll spend a few minutes with each customer after they settle in. This is because I have nothing better to do with the limited selection, so it makes sense to expend a few minutes more than I typically would in the hopes of a few early sales at the beginning of the night.
The way I look at it is this: If there are ten guys that say "maybe later" but there are another fifteen guys ITC then I need to go talk to the other fifteen guys before I waste time trying to convince these "maybe later" customers to buy.
My manager put it very well, he said "You walk over to a customer and pitch your line, if he says no you keep going until you've spoken to every single customer. If you still haven't gotten a dance then you start back with the original customer and pitch your line again. Keep going until someone finally gets a dance or they all tell you to get the fuck away from them". Now in every situation this approach would not be appropriate, but his general message was to be persistent and keep trying even in the face of rejection.
Re: Don't take no for an answer
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So how do you do that?
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but she never gives the science behind it.
Someone here has a signature that says "If you're good at something charge for it."
Good words to live by.
I thought the don't ask Why not? was damn good advice.
Re: Don't take no for an answer
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Originally Posted by
Stripper Hacks
Someone here has a signature that says "If you're good at something charge for it."
Good words to live by.
I thought the don't ask Why not? was damn good advice.
Your response still didn't tell us how you make all of your money.
I understand it is possible to make money in a club where you don't allow customers to touch you during dances. I used to never let customers touch me during regular lap dances and I still made money, but I found myself dancing for hours in the VIP room and I still made a little less than I do now. The customers always expected to touch in the VIP room.
For someone who gives low contact dances/air dances and doesn't allow customers to touch "without spending $500+" making $800/night consistently would be a feat. I'm not trying to offend anyone here, but $800/night is great money and even I have to work very hard to earn that with the things I do allow.
If you are a fantastic hustler then I applaud you, but even fantastic hustling won't make a guy spend hundreds of dollars a night if he isn't buying what you are selling. If a guy comes into a club with the intention of getting sex, a blow job, or full contact during a dance and you aren't offering it then he is going to move on. He may get a few dances but he's not going to "make your night". If no one in the club is offering what he wants then he will find a different club that has girls who will accommodate him. That is the nature of the "free" market.
The end-all-be all is that most guys that come into strip clubs don't envision themselves spending hundreds of dollars a night on a beautiful girl who plans to give "hot" air dances for an hour straight. Sure, there will always be a handful of chumps that do--but unless you have a sonar that picks up on how clueless they are and you have extreme accuracy you won't be running into those guys often.
I've worked in four different states and I have never once met a girl who was making over $500/night consistently just giving air dances--ever.
Re: Don't take no for an answer
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Then...why are you on this forum?
Probably because I'm a stripper and this is where strippers come to chit chat.
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Your response still didn't tell us how you make all of your money.
You're right it didn't.
The dance is irrelevant it's the hustle that counts.
Re: Don't take no for an answer
guys just take no for an answer, she isn't going to give up her hustle and talking to her about it for hours isn't going to change that!
Re: Don't take no for an answer
i agree that the dance is irrelevant but i am definitely questioning this begging-for-dances sell. and obviously LOLing @ women who don't believe that no, in fact, means no.
Re: Don't take no for an answer
At my current club, no means no.
The customers also know that they aren't going to get our time or company for free so they either pay for something or sit alone. We don't waste time trying to persuade them.
If you aren't their cup of tea, one of your friends might be, so I would excuse myself graciously, tell them it was lovely to meet them and if they change their mind later they can come and find me.
I think some guys want you to push harder, to be more desperate, but I don't play that game. Its a power play and I find it rude.
Re: Don't take no for an answer
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Originally Posted by
kitinboots
I think some guys want you to push harder, to be more desperate, but I don't play that game. Its a power play and I find it rude.
Exactly. I met a guy once (not in the club), who was telling me that he loves to spend money on strippers who are really able to sell the idea of lapdances, because he's a salesman himself. He wants them to spend their time really trying to convince him and pitching him. Now, is a good sales pitch important? Yes, but I'm not gonna keep going and going and going to prove something to someone who wants to play a stupid game. It's a $20 dance, not a $20,000 car. It's just wasting my time when there are plenty of others who won't make you play their silly game.
Re: Don't take no for an answer
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Originally Posted by
Aurora_Sunset
He wants them to spend their time really trying to convince him and pitching him.
Sounds like a major time-waster to me. :P Totally agree! In this case he should pay for the sales pitch, even if he isn't "sold" on a dance! Made a real "newb" mistake 2nd time I danced, similar to this. The guy wanted me to listen to his stupid made-up jokes before getting a dance. I was too polite and should've demanded $ for the time or walked away. Lesson learned & never again! :-[
Re: Don't take no for an answer
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Originally Posted by
MiaStarr
Sounds like a major time-waster to me. :P Totally agree! In this case he should pay for the sales pitch, even if he isn't "sold" on a dance! Made a real "newb" mistake 2nd time I danced, similar to this. The guy wanted me to listen to his stupid made-up jokes before getting a dance. I was too polite and should've demanded $ for the time or walked away. Lesson learned & never again! :-[
We had a completely dead night at the end of the winter season, just before we closed up for the summer. This boy, about 19 I think, came in with some friends, and brought his box of magic tricks with him. A couple of us made the mistake of going over. He was so sincere and sweet i didn't have the heart to interrupt and excuse myself. He was non stop and I got stuck there pretending to be amazed. His friends kept me plied with drinks, but they didn't buy dances or tip for time.
Re: Don't take no for an answer
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Originally Posted by
kitinboots
His friends kept me plied with drinks, but they didn't buy dances or tip for time.
welcome to the Canadian stripper experience.
Re: Don't take no for an answer
Being pushy is a huge turn off for a lot of people. Don't do it. Just move on. No one wants a pushy dancer.
And the ones who say no because of some power issue - well
I HATE guys who need to be "sold" and convinced. They ask shit like what does a lapdance consist of and want you to really sell them. Well fuck you, I'm moving on cuz not all of the guys there are assholes.
Re: Don't take no for an answer
yeah I don't even bother with guys like that. If they even try to go there I just say "I don't care enough to 'sell myself' more than I already am" and walk away. I have gotten a few dances from doing that but most of the time the guys are timewasters anyway.