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No, I don't think you're being paranoid at all. He may not be cheating on you precisely, but that's shady as fuck. You're in a committed relationship with him, so I think he should at least give you a heads up if he's going out, especially with a mixed group, not just an impromptu drink or two with the boys. That's bullshit, imo.
Ive got lots of pics on FB of me in other guys arms... I don't think its a big deal. Maybe they are good friends. Definitely follow it up but I wouldn't overact. It could backfire. But your feelings are normal so you shouldn't feel bad.
i agree with jessie on this one. however, i do find that a bit weird. i don't have a problem telling my so if i'm going somewhere with anyone and who that person is and vice versa.
The facts that he never mentioned a party before or after and you've known him a loooong time but never been so much as introduced to his other friends stinks to me. I smell a rat. People who keep their lives in neat little boxes can be other people with other relationships going simultaneously and no one would know. I wouldn't be comfortable with it.
Its on Facebook so it must not be that much a secret. If you don't like being out of the loop of his circle of friends, that's one thing but don't accuse him of anything until you know the facts and who people are. Just tell him to introduce you to more of his social circle and include you in more activities. I wouldn't jump to conclusions.
My instinct would say something is up......
You've been together since the beginning of the year? So 8-9 months now and you don't know any of his friends? That's shady as hell. He may not actually be cheating on you but I would be extremely wary of a guy who doesn't seem to want his gf to know anything about his social life...
Yeah my high alert would be up because of the not answering, but maybe he's just busy.....has he talked to you yet?
I only say this because in my on again off again relationship I have had to face the music several times about what I did "while we were single" but I ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS would balk and try to buy myself some time. It's actually good sign....because a total sociopath would cooly and calmly handle the situation, a real human goes "SHIT, what do I do here?"
Do y'all live together? If not, I don't think he needs to tell you every time he goes out. Other than that, I'm with Jessie. Ask him about it, but in a curious manner not an accusatory one.
I wouldn't worry too much about it. I have tons of guy friends, I don't always check in when I have an S.O., sometimes I go out at last minute w/ friends when I didn't have plans before to notify somebody of -& I have NEVER cheated. I'm sure many other people including others on here could say the same. Put yourself in his shoes -does he always expect you to check in w/ him, does he know all your friends yet now that you guys are back together? If it was the other way around & he was freaking out then everyone on here would be telling you to dump him. Give the dude a chance & try to be casual when you bring it up (otherwise most people just get defensive if they smell freak out whether they have done wrong or not).
Keep an eye out if you have a bad gut instinct for sure, but also sit back & try not to go overboard either. Example -2 phone calls & one text in 20 minutes is abit overboard....sorry to say. :-\
Good Luck, dear! :-*
Let us know what happens
All this right here. You guys don't need to be up each others' bums, but as someone else mentioned, compartmentalized lives are VERY shady. Like the majority, I believe you shouldn't freak out just yet because you don't know what's going on and by all means it could be completely innocent. But it definitely raises a flag.
Happy that all is well.;D
Make time to get to know his friends. It will go a long way.
^I agree. I dont think ur bf should be going out with groups of friends without you. ESPecially with some girl wrapping her arms around him. I think men use the "Oh, Im just hanging out with friends" as a cover. Guys like to feel like they dont have the constraints of a relationship sometimes which IMHO is bullshit. WHen other girls dont see the presence of a guy's gf sometimes they think its a free for all bc the gf isnt there. Not that the girl would fuck a girl's bf if she knew about the relationship every time. But some girls dont care. Just like some guys dont care either. People think "As long as Im not fucking the girl" its ok to flirt and carry on and I sure as hell dont agree.
In your situation I would break it off with him. Unless he isnt going to go out in public without u by his side. Sometimes guys' social life and stupid reputation is more important than the feelings of their gfs. Thats when its time to let the guy go. He doesnt appreciate what he has. EVen if he isnt sleeping with that girl who had her arms on him I still think he cant be trusted.
It's not strange at all, he's your boyfriend not your conjoined twin.
Well, jeez girl! A lot of that information makes a potentially shady situation seem a lot less shady! More details next time! lol Anyway, I'm glad things are good. I hate the touchy-feely girls who want to hug all over every guy and take pictures too, but they're rarely a true threat unless your bf is a guy who goes ga-ga over any female attention. I agree that next time, you should go out and meet his friends, even if you have to drive separately if you can only stay for a bit. Or, better yet, throw your own party and tell him to tell his friends - that way you can both meet each other's friends in one setting.
YES! Throw your own get together and get acquainted. They're probably as curious about you as you are about them. It also gives you a chance to see miss touchy feely for yourself. She might even want a three-some! :rotfl:
Whomever said the dude shouldn't go out in public without his SO... That's fucking whacked out. I'm my husband's spouse, not his warden.
Haha, yeah, I understand. I live in a studio too. Does your bf live someplace bigger? If not, don't worry about it. I'm sure if you just express to your bf that you'd really like to meet his friends, he'll find a way. It doesn't necessarily have to be you meeting them all at one time. I meet my bf's friends in bits and pieces, when maybe a couple of them are going to a bar, or someone's in town and wants to do lunch, so I go along for a bit. If he has a social life outside of just partying with these people, it shouldn't be difficult for him to find a time to introduce you here and there, as long as you're free.