Re: Declining Drinks. Rude?
bacardi and diet soda... or have the server bring you a glass with soda water and a lime wedge
Re: Declining Drinks. Rude?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
StripClubPsych
have the server bring you a glass with soda water and a lime wedge
Or diet soda, or have them just bring you water.
You have to work it out with the waitresses... so they know when you order a vodka-sprite/shot of clear liquor to bring you the soda water/plain water... but when you tip them well, they're pretty good about remembering.
Re: Declining Drinks. Rude?
^If you tell the bar/wait staff that you aren't drinking (but don't want to seem rude by turning down a drink) then you can order a "vodka lime soda"-which would realistically be just sparkling/soda water with a lime wedge.
Or a "vodka & orange" or "vodka & cranberry" etc-just juice (the over processed bar juices probably aren't a great substitute, but I know some gals that drink them instead of alcohol or energy drinks to keep up their sugar levels/energy throughout the night). Seeing as vodka doesn't really smell or taste strongly like some other spirits so it's a good mocktail non-ingredient.
Re: Declining Drinks. Rude?
If a dancer declines a drink, that's entirely her choice. While I might wonder why (or ask if we're close enough), it has no bearing on whether I get a dance from her later.
In fact, many dancers I know in my "home" club routinely turn down drinks from me, or get a less expensive drink than they would from somebody else, because we've been around each other enough for her to know that means more money to spend on dances with her. ;)
Re: Declining Drinks. Rude?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
missyqueenb
Im going on a extremly low cal diet to lose weight and the other day i looked up the calories in alcholic drinks and was shocked by how many cals they had. My drink of choice(smirnoff ice) had almost 300 cals per drink and i was drinking 5 in a shift! So ive decided to completelty cut out drinks to reach my weight goal. The problem is when a custy ask to buy me a drink and i decline i worry that he might be insulted and it could affect my chances of getting a dance. So my question is if a dancer was to decline your offer of a drink would you be offended or would it make no diffrence to you? To dancers is there a way that i can make it look like im drinking but actually not or what is a good substitue for alchol in the club?
The clubs I've been to, the club staff will get miffed if a girl refuses a drink because that's money lost to the club. One girl said on a friday or saturday night she'll have 5 to 6 drinks just sitting in the dressing room.
Re: Declining Drinks. Rude?
I always turn down drinks because a) I don't drink and b) I have to drive home after my shift and the blood alcohol limit is 0.5 here.
I just tell the customer about how I have to drive home after and don't want ANY alcohol in my system and they always understand. Most times i'll just let him buy me a bottle of water, lol.
Re: Declining Drinks. Rude?
^ my lub doesnt like us turning them down either, to the point that they've convinced a customer i was with to buy bottles of champagne 20 minutes before close, and ended up pouring almost a whole bottle down the sink - as far as management is concerned, it would end up in the sewer anyway.
Alcopops are the devil! Diet drinks etc are good - and actually a single vodka and diet coke has half the calories of orange juice! you can get no-added sugar cranbury, if you like that (there's not much fructose in cranberries, so it's sweetened with spleda or whatever) and its about 40 cals a glass i think
Re: Declining Drinks. Rude?
There are some guys who think that a tipsy dancer is a more "fun" dancer so you may find a few jerks that will move on to another girl if you don't want to drink with them. Not much you can do about these guys other than doing as others have suggested-work it out with the waitress or barmaid to serve you fake cocktail.
FWIW, if you are trying to lose weight and be more healthy diet soda is not really all that good for you, especially if you re going to drink it all night, every shift. I drink bottled water in the clubs and so do most of the dancers that I spend time with. All of them will usually have one cocktail during a shift and go with water the rest of the night. One big advantage to this is that you can carry it around, keep it closed, and not have to worry about some one messing with your drink.
Re: Declining Drinks. Rude?
Just nurse a drink all night long. Carry a cup with some sort of liquid in it around with you when you're going up to customers. Since you've already got a drink with you, that should eliminate them making offers.
Re: Declining Drinks. Rude?
Thank you guys, i really like alot of the ideas here especially the getting fake drinks. I always feel awakard about completely declining drinks and guys give me weird looks when i order water so these are good mediums! Thanks!
Re: Declining Drinks. Rude?
We had this discussion over on the blue side once, I believe... and it was brought up that at clubs where it's customary to buy the ladies sitting with you a drink (this is more at clubs where girls get some sort of cut on house fees or have a drink minimum), some customers will take girls turning down a drink as a sort of rejection... like a sign she's busy/doesn't have time or the wish to dance for them.
Also. There ARE customers who like to buy girls drinks and pay the girls just to sit and chat with them. Turning down drinks CAN alienate these customers.
Just a few thoughts on the actual 'turning down drinks' part of the original post.
Re: Declining Drinks. Rude?
I worked at a club where selling drinks was part of a dancer's money. This was a club where we were paid each time a customer bought a drink for the dancer. This was strictly a stage and drink club, meaning no VIP and no dances. I rarely drink and will not drink in situations where I know I need to keep myself sober at all times to avoid being in bad situations. How it was set up at the club was they fixed a cranberry juice for me but called it vodka/cranberry drink. The customer never knew it was non alcoholic. I worked at a few other clubs where selling drinks was part of the job, so I told other clubs about this and they worked with me.
When I've worked clubs where we weren't paid to take drinks (mostly table dance clubs) I usually declined drinks, telling them I preferred to dance for them. In these cases I normally walked around with a bottle of water. A few times guys bought me drinks but these were guys who I knew would pay me for sitting with them. The problem I've seen at these clubs is often dancers would sit with guys longer than they normally would and would just drink. I don't work to drink.
Re: Declining Drinks. Rude?
Rude. No.
If you are sitting with me and it's time for the next round I will offer you a drink. It's just what I do. I understand you are working and if you accepted every drink offered to you, every shift your health would go downhill quickly. Whether you accept and order a alcholic or non alcoholic drink doesn't make a difference to me. If I've decided to go on a bender I don't expect you or anyone else to come with me.
However, the concept of a "fake" drink does bother me. If i'm paying for a drink with alcohol I want the drink to be with alcohol.
If you feel awkward I wouldn't mind any of "I just finished a drink", "I'm pacing myself", "I'm driving", "No thanks, I'm good" or anything similar.
Re: Declining Drinks. Rude?
I don't know if this will help or not, but at my old club I drank Gin and tonics because they're one of the lowest calorie alcoholic drinks at only about 100 calories. It can still add up over the night depending on how much you drink (and honestly, I know most people don't like gin) but if you do want to have a little drink here and there and are just worried about the calories, there a few options with a much lower calorie count. Otherwise, I agree with the concept of letting the waitresses/bartenders know that you really want just a non-alcoholic drink, even if if you order it alcoholic to keep up appearances of "having fun."
Re: Declining Drinks. Rude?
Missqueenb, the guys that are answering your questions on here are not representative of the norm IMHO.
You will encounter a fair number of guys who will take it badly if you refuse a drink. It is not just the fact that they may feel like you are a prude, but it can also make them feel self-conscious about how much they have had to drink. Net-net, the refusal of a drink can be a damper for the guy who you are sitting with.
In many cases you will never even know that the guy cares as he will not say anything. Instead, he may just quietly hope that you hurry up and finish the bottled water that he is kicking himself for buying so that someone less uptight can sit next to him.
If I were you, I would take the advice of the ladies regarding the fake or extremely lo-cal alcoholic drinks.
Re: Declining Drinks. Rude?
I think it's difficult to accurately predict how customers in general will respond to anything that happens in a strip club since we are all pre-programmed in some sort of deep genetic way to be universally blind to the existence of other customers in the club at all. And this blindness is profound -- it's visual, physical and very nearly epistemological.
So in threads like this it is tempting to predict that all the other guys in the club will somehow respond to events like drink invitations in a way that approximates how each of us would, individually. This is, of course, an extrapolation of our own behavior to a pool of men in the club that we know so little about that we couldn't pick them out of a lineup with a .45 revolver pointed to our heads.
This is yet another example of dancers knowing customers better than we ever will. After all, the dancers' very livelihood depends entirely on their relationship with this cohort that doesn't even exist in our universe.
(Disclaimer: Yes, I know that the Blue Side offers some sliver of visibility into how all the other guys behave, and that can sometimes be instructive. However, that's a self-selecting group whose experiences are also self-reported.)
Since everything is always about the money -- potential loss of income was the OP's original concern, and it's a valid one -- whatever minimizes that potential loss is where she wants to be.
Much like the experience of living around Steve Jobs, the club is its own reality distortion field, as we all know. That distortion allows -- or even encourages -- choices that on the surface may be deceptive, with the end intent of pleasing the customers. The same is true of magic.
This suggests that water or any declared non-alcoholic option -- or worse, actually refusing the drink -- may risk breaking the magic spell. While many customers may be pleased with the dancer's "honesty" -- yes, that too is another part of the magic act -- there are inevitably going to be others who are displeased enough about the change in interactive chemistry to shut their wallets and seek out dancers who they perceive to be more cooperative or accepting.
In the club, fake alcoholic drinks are part of the magic act. Embrace the magic. :)
Re: Declining Drinks. Rude?
Set it up before hand to have a "stage name" special with staff. You get to explain the recipe to the bar and the client. If everybody reads between the limes properly the pie gets bigger and everybody wins.
Re: Declining Drinks. Rude?
As other girls have said let the bar staff know you're not drinking and hopefully they'll know to hold the liquor when you order a drink. Though when I couldn't drink last year because of medication I was on and told the waitress and 10 minutes later she was trying to get a guy to buy me a shot (not malicious, just really ditsy).
Also had a club say they couldn't do that as it's technically stealing from the customer (though the waitress that told me that would do it for other girls).
If this happens there are many ways to get rid of unwanted drinks; make an excuse to go to the dressing room and leave it there, go to the bar and ask them to tip it out and fill it up with soda, if it's a gin and tonic you can get away with tipping it out in the bathroom and filling it up with water, 'accidentally' leave it in the lap room when you go for a dance (trust me, they never notice), leave it at the bar to get rid of when you're moving on to the next custie.
I wish more clubs would have the special "Dancer Cocktail" that's non-alcoholic, makes things so much simpler.
Re: Declining Drinks. Rude?
I'm much like most of the guys that post here in pink. Accepting or declining my offer of a drink won't make much of a difference to me at all. I'm not visiting here just to get you drunk (yep, different from most patrons of the SC, I understand).
At the same time, I would ask that you not leave your partial drink on my table and 'ask me to watch it'. That's just dumb as who knows what some pervert could put into your drink in hopes that you will come back & drink it. If your done with your drink, I would rather you just state it as so. I won't get upset with that. But I realize that some guys probably would so it would be best if you just take your half-finished drink to the bar if your done with it. Sorry for the thread-jack but that's happened to me twice in the past month.
Re: Declining Drinks. Rude?
You'll find as many customers who respect the fact that you don't get shitfaced while you work - not to mention the fact that getting customers to pay for fake drinks is dishonest and adds to our reputation for greed and manipulation. One one hand people assume that dancers all have substance-abuse problems; on the other, some get upset that you won't drink with them. There's something to be said, too, for not consuming a significant amount of alcohol too often; drinking every day, especially more than one drink, isn't very good for you: it'll age you before your time. Overall, if you can't make money in one place you can always make it somewhere else.
Re: Declining Drinks. Rude?
Waitresses and clubs and dancers used to have a symbiotic thing about drinks but that all went down the toilet a few years ago. Now, order the drink, don't really drink it, and when he's not looking, dump it somewhere, preferably into a glass of the "water back" you ordered w the drink.
Re: Declining Drinks. Rude?
If she declines my offer that's cool with me. I much rather her say no then get a drink and not drink it. Nothing makes me more mad then for her to order a $10 mixed drink and not touch it or just take a sip. That's rude and puts you on my bad side.
Re: Declining Drinks. Rude?
Please understand that this strategy advocated in TOO post is not within regulation in all states and could result in loss of liquor license in those areas that consider claiming to sell an alcohol drink with no alcohol in it a version of fraud.
Quote:
Originally Posted by
The Other Owner
I think it's difficult to accurately predict how customers in general will respond to anything that happens in a strip club since we are all pre-programmed in some sort of deep genetic way to be universally blind to the existence of other customers in the club at all. And this blindness is profound -- it's visual, physical and very nearly epistemological.
So in threads like this it is tempting to predict that all the other guys in the club will somehow respond to events like drink invitations in a way that approximates how each of us would, individually. This is, of course, an extrapolation of our own behavior to a pool of men in the club that we know so little about that we couldn't pick them out of a lineup with a .45 revolver pointed to our heads.
This is yet another example of dancers knowing customers better than we ever will. After all, the dancers' very livelihood depends entirely on their relationship with this cohort that doesn't even exist in our universe.
(Disclaimer: Yes, I know that the Blue Side offers some sliver of visibility into how all the other guys behave, and that can sometimes be instructive. However, that's a self-selecting group whose experiences are also self-reported.)
Since everything is always about the money -- potential loss of income was the OP's original concern, and it's a valid one -- whatever minimizes that potential loss is where she wants to be.
Much like the experience of living around Steve Jobs, the club is its own reality distortion field, as we all know. That distortion allows -- or even encourages -- choices that on the surface may be deceptive, with the end intent of pleasing the customers. The same is true of magic.
This suggests that water or any declared non-alcoholic option -- or worse, actually refusing the drink -- may risk breaking the magic spell. While many customers may be pleased with the dancer's "honesty" -- yes, that too is another part of the magic act -- there are inevitably going to be others who are displeased enough about the change in interactive chemistry to shut their wallets and seek out dancers who they perceive to be more cooperative or accepting.
In the club, fake alcoholic drinks are part of the magic act. Embrace the magic. :)
Re: Declining Drinks. Rude?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
racejeff
Please understand that this strategy advocated in TOO post is not within regulation in all states and could result in loss of liquor license in those areas that consider claiming to sell an alcohol drink with no alcohol in it a version of fraud.
Are you referring to your post on the blue side where you call this a "dancer drinking scam" that "has cost me thousands over the years?"
I can see where you might be bitter.
The thing is, I can't find any reference to such a provision in Indiana ABC statutes or in Indianapolis code, either. (The code appears to have been amended significantly.)
Perhaps this:
IC 7.1-5-4-6
Fraudulent statements prohibited
Sec. 6. Fraudulent Statement Prohibited. It is unlawful for a person to make a statement, written or oral, as to payment to, or the receipt by, the state, for the purpose of defrauding the state of a tax or license fee imposed by this title.
____
But this prohibition appears to be a proscription on the reverse, e.g. it applies only in cases where alcoholic beverages are sold but no tax is collected or paid to the state on that sale. If anything, "fake drinks" that are charged as such would result in excess fees paid to the state, and in any case would not constitute a violation of this provision.
There is also a general provision banning misrepresentation, but that is specific to the misrepresentation of brands and the intent of the provision is clearly to prevent unlawful selling of a cheap brand at the price of an expensive one.
Aside from misrepresentation of records -- the club would have to reflect actual content of drinks in records and pay appropriate taxes and fees, including local, state and federal, which I think is a given as a lawful business practice -- I don't see any provision in the code that bans such a practice.
And of course there are myriad different laws governing alcohol sales across the country (I think it's actually stipulated in Nevada law that public intoxication is legal), and I'm far from an expert, so each club would have to fend for itself within that tangled web.
But as a guideline, the general provisions of most statutes specifically stipulate that the prevailing intent of the code is to protect the general welfare of the public, so it would be an interesting argument to make to a judge or magistrate that selling a non-alcoholic beverage to be consumed by a third party in a strip club -- assuming all fees are paid and true records maintained -- is against the public interest.
BTW, if everybody had a great time during your club visits, who cares? :)