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Completely frustrated PSO and Cammer and could really use some advice
I am sure my story is not uncommon, and I do greatly apologize if this question has already been asked, but I have no idea what to do. Without boring you all with details, I will keep my story short - I've been laid off from a few jobs over the past 3 years due to the economy. 3 jobs in 3 years, to be exact. Each had told me I was a permanent employee, only to be surprised with being laid off without warning. I was just laid off from my most current job on Nov. 1st.
I am currently working as a PSO for several places but it's not enough money. My bf is perfectly fine with this.
So, enter camming. This is something I personally have NO PROBLEM doing. I casually brought it up as another income solution, to which he replied, "I don't know about all that, now." So, I dropped it and didn't try to discuss it further.
How can I bring this up to him so he understands it's just a job? I just really want to help out the household and since jobs are scarce, and I am pregnant anyway (they will find reason NOT to hire a pregnant woman), finding a job is near impossible and I am not getting the freelance design work I use to be able to grab years ago. I'd love to be open about this with him, to let him know, once again, this is just a job, and from what I see, a viable solution to our problem. (We don't need a TON of money, just enough to get by)
Advice?
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Re: Completely frustrated PSO and Cammer and could really use some advice
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Re: Completely frustrated PSO and Cammer and could really use some advice
It's really up to you how to discuss this with him. There's not really much you can say to put his mind at ease, because camming is putting yourself way farther out there than being a PSO. Just explain to him that with the baby coming (because babies cost serious money) that one of you will HAVE to find a way to make ends meet and be able to start putting some money away for the baby gets here.
Yes, you will need a TON of money :) make sure he knows that. With clothes, formula, diapers, doctor visits, baby furniture, bottles, toys, etc. PLUS a nice little cushion for you guys to get by on while you are going to be out of commission after the baby arrives. Between no sleep, the arguments (oh yes.. they will happen), changing shitty diapers, having the baby puke on you at least once a day, and all the other JOYS of being parents.. you will want AT LEAST to have some money saved. :)
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Re: Completely frustrated PSO and Cammer and could really use some advice
wait- is your man willing to support you while you are working or does he want you to work?
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Re: Completely frustrated PSO and Cammer and could really use some advice
So your boyfriend isn't providing you an allowance or some kind of income for the both of you?
If he's not I'd tell him, "Tough shit." And start camming anyway.
He's your boyfriend and not your husband.
Personally, if any man isn't providing me with the funds I need to support myself then he has NO right to tell me how I'm going to make my money or spend my money. And if he has a problem with it he can go cry about it and leave. ::)
Harsh example. But that's what it will come down too if he's not willing to bend on his end.
YOUR body. YOUR choice. YOUR money.
or
You give up so he doesn't throw a hissy fit and he controls what you do?
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Re: Completely frustrated PSO and Cammer and could really use some advice
Thank you ladies, for all your support and understanding! :) He works very hard and we still don't have enough money to cover all the bills. We live together and I really do need to work. He's totally fine with the phone sex, but I am not too sure about camming. I agree it is MY body but I am trying to avoid a possible huge fight. I just want to help him understand the reasons I want to do this, for the money, not because I just want to show myself, as I fear he may take it. I am just willing to do whatever I need to do to make money, within legal limits, of course and who is gonna hire a pregnant lady who is gonna turn around and need maternity leave in 3 months? Then, there would be child care and all of that. IMHO, this is a good option for us, if he will just go for it. If not, then I don't know what to do because I have no place to go. Sure, once I got going, I could pay for an apartment and internet, and support myself, but I have no way to get an apartment right now and wouldn't be able to get internet to cam if I am not here.
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Re: Completely frustrated PSO and Cammer and could really use some advice
Quote:
Originally Posted by
HaydenBlue
So your boyfriend isn't providing you an allowance or some kind of income for the both of you?
If he's not I'd tell him, "Tough shit." And start camming anyway.
He's your boyfriend and not your husband.
Personally, if any man isn't providing me with the funds I need to support myself then he has NO right to tell me how I'm going to make my money or spend my money. And if he has a problem with it he can go cry about it and leave. ::)
Harsh example. But that's what it will come down too if he's not willing to bend on his end.
YOUR body. YOUR choice. YOUR money.
or
You give up so he doesn't throw a hissy fit and he controls what you do?
^THIS. Either he gets a second (or third) job to pick up the slack or you need to part ways. If you're having financial difficulties now it's only going to escalate once your child gets here. There are some (vanilla) legitimate work at home jobs out there but most pay slightly above minimum wage.
Do what's best for you. Good luck.
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Re: Completely frustrated PSO and Cammer and could really use some advice
Yes, I agree with you! This is why I have turned to being a PSO and want to cam because there is more money (right now) and I can still be a mom and contribute to the household. I will just have to talk to him tonight. Maybe it would lessen the taboo of it if I changed the way I look on cam or something. Does that really make a difference?
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Re: Completely frustrated PSO and Cammer and could really use some advice
Quote:
Originally Posted by
LusciousBBW
Yes, I agree with you! This is why I have turned to being a PSO and want to cam because there is more money (right now) and I can still be a mom and contribute to the household. I will just have to talk to him tonight. Maybe it would lessen the taboo of it if I changed the way I look on cam or something. Does that really make a difference?
It doesn't sound like it really matters to him. He doesn't want you to cam period, end of story. I've seen this scenario played out way too many times. Again, do what's best for you and unborn child.
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Re: Completely frustrated PSO and Cammer and could really use some advice
I am going to do that. I would do anything for this child. Anything. I feel this is my best option and I won't have to worry about getting laid off.
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Re: Completely frustrated PSO and Cammer and could really use some advice
Quote:
Originally Posted by
LusciousBBW
I am going to do that. I would do anything for this child. Anything. I feel this is my best option and I won't have to worry about getting laid off.
If you feel that is the best decision, go for it. Personally, I would hate to be in a position of depending on a boyfriend who can't support me to begin with. Then on top of that he wants to dictate how I (legally) make money. You said in your OP that you don't need a ton of money and I respectfully disagree. Children are very expensive. Plus you never know if you'll end up a single parent. Not judging you, but the fact that you're not married to this guy makes it even easier for him to bounce at any moment. Yes there's child support, but there's no such thing as ex-girlfriend support. Better start mapping out a plan of action now.
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Re: Completely frustrated PSO and Cammer and could really use some advice
Yeah, I don't like to be in a situation like this either. I have always been independent and taken care of myself until the economy tanked. I had my own house, car, bills - all taken care of by me and no one else. I'm not use to depending on anyone for anything and it makes me feel trapped, which is more reason for me to do this, so I can make as much as possible instead of sitting around waiting for someone to hire me for $8/hr. I didn't mean I don't need a lot of money - I agree that I do - but I didn't want to make it look like I was thinkin I'd get rich off of this or anything. I'd be happy bringing in 4k a month, from which I understand is quite modest in this business, or have I misunderstood? It's legal and I'm legal and no reason not to make the money where it's at.
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Re: Completely frustrated PSO and Cammer and could really use some advice
$4000 a month means you have to put in alot of time, effort & marketing.
Thinking it will be easy or fast money is a mistake.
If he is so busy working, then cam while he is at work and lie to him.
I am a bit confused. He is your boyfriend. So any health insurance he has through his job, does it cover you?
Because doctors & hospitals are expensive & it will be YOU held responsible for this bill.
Asking permission, come again. You need a man to tell you how to live life & make decisions,
$4000 is not a modest income in camming. It is not a modest income in most jobs.
You are pregnant. You have a major responsibility on the way. I think that would take priority over anything else. But then again I dont need a man to make my decisions for me. I have always been able to do that for myself.
Sam
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Re: Completely frustrated PSO and Cammer and could really use some advice
One thing you might want to consider: pregnancy fetish is huge. Lots of guys interested in being humiliated by a pregnant girl/forced to take care of another man's kids if you work the cuckold/domme angle, or wanting the fantasy of a pregnant wife/girlfriend family to provide for if you take the sweetheart/phone GFE angle. Both are profitable. And a lot of guys simply find the changes in your body very erotic - be prepared to market accordingly, because they will ask!
This is a time-limited opportunity to shoot your own pregnant content. You can wear a wig/cute glasses, dye your hair and then dye it back, use a different hair/makeup/clothing style or just roll as you. If you talk to him about camming as one of the few paid work situations where being pregnant is to your advantage, he may bend his views temporarily... or he may not, but either way the option is there for you. Best of luck.
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Re: Completely frustrated PSO and Cammer and could really use some advice
I was in a similar situation with my ex, except 1. I wasn't pregnant and we have no kids to support (thank goodness!), and 2. He didn't have a job and didn't work at all during the entire time we were together. He lived with me for almost a year and I paid all of the bills, he contributed absolutely ZERO to the house. He knew from day one that I cammed exclusively because jobs are very hard to come by in my town, and while he claimed he'd be okay with it, actually seeing me do it made him very upset. We used to get into fights all the time over me "whoring myself out" (his words), he would belittle me, insult me- pretty much do anything for me to not cam because it made him feel insecure. Wanting to save our relationship I worked less and less in order to please him, until finally I was not working enough hours/earning enough to even cover our rent. When it got to the point that we hardly had enough food to eat and were almost evicted due to me not being able to pay rent one month he started being okay about me camming because he saw first hand that it was either I cam or we literally starve. Trust me, you DO NOT want to let your finances get to the point I let mine get to, especially with a baby on the way! In my opinion, based solely on my experience, letting my finances suffer just to soothe my partner's ego was the absolute wrong decision. I wish I would have realized this sooner, and I truly hope that you come to the decision that works before for you.
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Re: Completely frustrated PSO and Cammer and could really use some advice
Maybe try sexting?
Also doing content - pics and videos - that may be better cuz you aren't actually interacting with other people.
Although if my bf said no I couldn't cam, I would say fine I expect you to pay for everything I could ever possibly need. No matter how hard he works, he won't want to do that, lol. :p
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Re: Completely frustrated PSO and Cammer and could really use some advice
I've been a pso for several years now, it was fine in college for spending money, but doesn't cut it for real bills. I suggest camming and selling clips or pics of pregnancy/lactation through a site like ELM or C4S. If your bf can't support you, he def can't support a baby.
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Re: Completely frustrated PSO and Cammer and could really use some advice
Sam - Thank you for this feedback. I see I was mistaken in that 4k was modest in this biz. What would be a more feasible expectation? I really do appreciate your honesty. That's exactly what I need. :)
Sabrina, Courtney, Innes, Amanda - thank you all for your advice and support. I think that the more I try to talk to him, I realize he feels bad that I am even considering this kind of work - as if he himself has failed me somehow, but that's not at all how I see him.
Innes - where do I go for sexting? I've looked but couldn't find a feasible place to do so. I've thought about videos and clips as well, but I honestly have no clue what to put in them.
Sabrina - thank you for this! Are there camsites who feed more into this fetish than others? I am 6 months now, so I better get started. I ordered a couple of wigs and will be starting next week once they arrive. Is there a market for bbw as well? I am about a 14 when I am not pregnant.
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Re: Completely frustrated PSO and Cammer and could really use some advice
Texting, check out this site: http://www.text121chat.com/ ummm I'm not sure of any others off the top of my head.
It's not as much money as you can make camming but it might do.
I'm on this site: http://www.southern-charms.com/sc-main.html
And it is a great site for content and they are great for bigger girls and pregnancy too, you could do great. It's mostly pics, but you can get into camming and videos as well with SC if you want, but you just start out with pics. :)
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Re: Completely frustrated PSO and Cammer and could really use some advice
Text121 pays very poorly. It's not substantial enough to pay household bills and definitely too low to take care of the expenses that come with a baby. My advice to you is to choose one thing that will meet your financial needs and focus on that. Time's-a-wastin'. Are you aware SW has a camming forum? There are some members who have cammed while pregnant and spoke candidly about their experiences. You should definitely check it out.
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Re: Completely frustrated PSO and Cammer and could really use some advice
Nikki - I saw that when I checked it out last night, but it appeared to be something I could do to supplement an income. I have spent much of the day today applying for WAH jobs, since as you said, time is wasting. The only thing with those is all of the equipment requirements they have in order to begin working with them.
I have been active on the camming forum here. I love all of the ladies and the posts. I am going to start my camming next week, once my things arrive. Plus, his work hours will pick back up. :)