Guys sticking their hands down their pants to "adjust"?
It really irritates me when guys say they have to adjust themselves, stick their hands onto their bare dicks to shove it upward so it pokes me more, and then go to touch me! What should I say? I don't carry hand sanitizer anymore and it's kind of a mood killer to tell them to go wash their hands...
Unfortunately I have had to return to dancing a few days a month. I'm only dancing about 1/3 of the time I used to, but monetary problems have come up so I've had to choice. At least I've been able to cut back significantly.
However, I know dancing is fucking with my head mentally. I've made a thread already explaining why in detail, and I really hate it. I have a little under three years until I have the degree I need to quit dancing and support my son and myself financially without the sex industry. It's quite depressing, but I digress.
So tonight I have to go back to the torture chamber, and feel degraded and objectified by customers. The worst part is I have to work in the dirty club I'm contracted at because there is absolutely NO money in the clean club I normally work at until at least April, and that's being generous. With that being said, I'm stuck in the whore house/torture chamber/rape dungeon for a few more months anytime I need to strip. If I don't go there I'll wind up working for free or about $5/hour (quite literally) which is laughable and insulting, and even more degrading than working in the dirty club.
With that being said, I really want tonight to not be psychologically distressing. BUT, I don't want to hurt my money either. Most of the time customers don't ask about touching at the table, and I'm tempted to tell them they can't touch me during dances. I haven't done that in over a year, placed restrictions on touching for people who spend a decent amount. I don't mind some touching, but I have rules I want to impose again. I'm thinking I'll say "you can't touch me unless we do at least $100 worth of dances" (at this club all dances are done in private rooms) which means they will either get 1-2 dances and quit or I will at least get a larger amount for the disgust and violation I go through while they touch me. Also, if they agree to the $100 for touching I can collect the money upfront and then impose specific rules such as "no touching my nipples, don't touch near my inner thighs or crotch, no spanking". Those are the big ones, and since they've already paid they can kiss my ass if they want a refund.
I made a thread about making money in a high contact club before, but you really have to be up for it mentally to play the game. I'm sick and tired of doing 1-2 $25 dances with these pervs, having them grope me all over, and not making much money from it. At this club my whole $40-50/song to touch is not working so well because of all the prostitution going on around me.
I really want to focus on quality tonight--doing four or more songs with a few different, respectful customers versus doing 1-2 dances with ten different guys who are drunk and rude.
Also, since all dances are done in private rooms I feel stupid taking a guy upstairs for 1-2 songs. I'll do it if there's nothing else available, but it just seems so petty to walk all the way up there, go in a private room, have them pay the bouncer, and so forth for $25-$50.
How should I explain that I won't go upstairs for less than two songs? On a slow night it would be dumb to say the minimum was $100 to go upstairs, so $50 minimum seems fair. This is a very upscale club, 18,000 sq feet, very well publicized, so it is supposed to cater to upscale gentlemen but I feel like most of the customers are broke anyway.
I think I should say "I have a two song minimum to go in the VIP rooms, and if you want to be naughty and touch me then we have to do four songs so I can get into it and take my time with you". Does that sound too pushy? I like them to know what we're getting into before we go upstairs so there are no surprises since SO many girls are offering extras there, I don't want to say too much that might imply I'm offering head or sexl.
Thanks!
-Laurisa
Re: Guys sticking their hands down their pants to "adjust"?
I'm sorry to hear you're having to deal with all of that. At my new club, there are no set club fees besides $20 dances and the price of champagne bottles, so you have to set your own price before you enter any of the private rooms with a customer. The only thing I can think that may help you is to make sure you say that it's however-many dollars IN DANCES, or else a however-many DANCE minimum. At my first club, it was expected that all dancers did extras, which I didn't know. I went up into VIP without being told that there was no minimum cut that a dancer would get for bringing a customer upstairs or anything like that, and then once I got into a private booth with a customer, the "how much to fuck you" conversation proved I wasted all of the time I had already invested, and I didn't get ANY money out of it. Now, I make sure that when someone is asking prices and they seem to be suggesting they want more than what's on the menu, I put the word dance in my response. Usually the ones who are going to be the worst about it will say something like, "Oh, and what does a 'dance' buy me?" I think you can judge by their reaction to the way you word things whether they're going to try to push you for more. I realize you already had 'dance' in your possible lines, which I don't think are too pushy, but I just wanted to stress how much clarifying what "services" I offer has helped me to cut down on feeling victimized once I think I've made a sale.
In regards to the hands in the pants thing... What the fuck? You're right to be completely disgusted by that. Would your bouncers back you up on it if you demanded payment for the song that was going on then (assuming you didn't already get the cash), and demanded that he go wash his hands? I feel like so many men have mommy issues that if a hot stripper shamed him for his behavior and pulled the wash your hands line, he might just be too emasculated to fuck up your night further.
Edit: I realize you said that's a mood killer, but the thought of seeing a strange man touch his dick then touch me (despite knowing most of them probably don't wash their hands after the bathroom) would make me want to puke. I can't think up any other response I'd recommend than treating him like a dirty child.
Re: Guys sticking their hands down their pants to "adjust"?
what I try to do is: $150 half hour in VIP which includes ''unlimited dances"- but really its 15 dances
or
$300 for the hour.
just like your club, I dont see a cut of the vip either so I do this method sometimes if i think the guy will pay it
good luck!
Re: Guys sticking their hands down their pants to "adjust"?
I assumed they were adjusting on top of their underwear...kinda like fixing a wedgie lol just pull your underwear until your situated. I don't stare or look when they do it so I guess I don't know.
As far as your misery with dancing: the only thing that will help is a long break or a complete change of work.
Re: Guys sticking their hands down their pants to "adjust"?
Ew guys do this all the time. Sometimes they really are getting pinched and I think they're just gross and don't wash their hands ever. Then, like the stupid jerk that came up to me for a dance, tried to demand a two for one, and kept trying to rub his dick up and down my leg. Because he was also cheap I told him in a very serious tone that I'm not a sex toy and he can go to the bathroom to masturbate. Ended the dance needless to say.
When I work at clubs where a lot of guys expect extras I try to pay very close attention to the crowd and pick out the guys who come in alone and look lonely or out of place. I target first timers and those just visiting from out of town as they have no expectations usually. Also, if you can find a guy who is shy and feeling like he doesn't fit in with the party you can approach him and offer a more private and quieter area and he might just want company and a couple dances. When you get one of these and he's not horrible to dance for really work on getting him back to see you again. Try to get contact info if you're comfortable with that and contact him right away saying how great a time you had and make future dates with him. Guys that don't want extras and go to these clubs anyways often are turned off by the extras hustle and will be more than happy to come in just for you if you flatter them right. Oh yea, and I think this was just posted somewhere, but never underestimate the power of acting turned on when dancing for a guy. Pretend something he does that doesn't disgust you makes you feel so so good and in a sex kitten way beg him not to stop. If he thinks you're getting yourself off rubbing on him he won't want to stop you. Also, instead of telling a regular no, tell him not here if he pushes your limits. It's a much gentler way to stop the behavior and gives them hope that you would like him to do that somewhere outside of the club.
Re: Guys sticking their hands down their pants to "adjust"?
Thanks girls. I made $260 last night, not great but not horrible. It was all from one guy. I'm back at work again. Thanks to BOTM for the sales idea especially.