-
Jealous of other cam girls
Just started camming about a month ago, here and there. One thing that I am desperately trying to change is my jealousy of other cam girls. It is so hard, I never really had many girl friends growing up, just hated all of the backstabbing and drama that came along with most of them, but I know not every girl is like the stuck up girls that I went to school with.
Somedays I hop on Streamate and have such jealousy toward a few certain models. I try to honestly ask myself what is wrong with myself to think this way about someone... Looking at them they are beautiful and just trying to live their lives, but the jealous feelings still bubble up. I feel terrible that I am that way.
Does anyone else feel this way? Or any advice on changing these feelings.
-
Re: Jealous of other cam girls
Honestly, I don't have time to check out other sites except v. briefly to get an idea about traffic if things are slow for me. So, I would suggest you ignore everyone else and just do your own thing. Good luck!
-
Re: Jealous of other cam girls
I can be very jealous and intimidated by women irl but never on SM or camming sites so it's usually the other way around for me. However, I like to look upon other girls who work on SM as my colleagues.
It might help you if you try to pinpoint exactly what you envy them for and then work with that. x
-
Re: Jealous of other cam girls
Stop watching them. You're jealous of them and there's no way to fix it but to work on your own insecurities. If you're happier with yourself, you'll be less jealous of what other people have and more motivated to reach the same level of success or whatever you're jealous of.
-
Re: Jealous of other cam girls
Nope. I am not jealous of other camgirls. That is too much negative energy.
-
Re: Jealous of other cam girls
Think about what it is about them that makes you jealous. Big boobs? Save up and buy some. Super toned body? Get a gym membership. Long, thick hair? Buy extensions. (You don't need to have any of those- those are just examples, but you obviously want something they have if you're jealous.) They're making lots of money? Find the site(s) that works best for you (trial and error) and then you'll be making your own. There's a reason why you're jealous whether you consciously realize what it is or not. Think hard.
-
Re: Jealous of other cam girls
no im happy for all the girls on cam i see becuz i know they are dealing with the same crap as me working it lol so if they are doing well you besta belive they are trying hard threw trial and error. if anything you should come up with your on special tatics to pay your self and dont worry about the other girls . find out what kinda ways to work what it is that you have yourself (in or on you) if that makes any sense with my special needs typing lol
-
Re: Jealous of other cam girls
Thank you for the replies. It's really weird, I can look all day at some and then there are a few that I am extremely jealous of, and they aren't even the most beautiful women I have seen! I showed the ones that bother me to my hubby and he said that they are the girls that he thinks closely resemble me.
I watched one today and actually listened to her interacting with the guys and she was the sweetest girl. I almost cried because of all of the negative things I thought about her. She says that she is a shy canadian, and now I think I went from being jealous of her to having a crush on her. :)
-
Re: Jealous of other cam girls
I can almost guarantee that it is their nice bodies. I have 4 kids and never really tried to get in shape before or after the kiddos. I was always on the curvier side. I think the smallest size I ever was was a 9/10 when I was 16. Now I'm a size 16. :( I just ordered P90X and I'm going to put my all into it.
Hubby said I'm beautiful just the way I am and I think I've only had one ass in chat tell me I've had a few too many donuts... lol. I'm sure that there will be more of those haters if I continue to cam.
Recently I have felt sexier with my body and I know it will only get better if I work on it.
-
Re: Jealous of other cam girls
No, I'm not jealous, I'm waaaaay too satisfied with myself, lol:D
I don't know what US size I am, but I'm sure it's way more than 16, I love it, men love it, everyone's happy! If you're not happy with your body, you know what to do:)
-
Re: Jealous of other cam girls
ive already been called fat on cam and i think im pretty average for my height *shrugs*
-
Quote:
Originally Posted by LaurenAus
ive already been called fat on cam and i think im pretty average for my height *shrugs*
I have seen this so many times. Many average sized girls get called fat. I am 5'7 and 155 pounds which is borderline overweight (160 is the highest I can be before I can medically be called overweight). Yesterday I got called fugly and obese and weigh 2 tons by one guy. Technically I would have to gain 50 pounds to be considered obese, so the dude is an idiot but I just chose to laugh it off and say, "I am a fugly obese whore. 2 tons? Nah I weigh 5 tons. Now I don't think all my rolls can fit on cam!" 10 minutes later he came into my private room (someone else had taken me private) and told me he thinks I am funny and have a great personality for such an obese woman. He said he normally spends his money on "hot petite models" but had to come in my room because he liked my response. He spent 5 minutes in private saying he adored my personality but thought I was too obese for the job.
-
Re: Jealous of other cam girls
Very occasionally I will look at a girl who has something that I simply cannot have and feel a little jealous - someone who is very tall and thin, for example - I'm five foot, and I can bust my ass in the gym all I want, but I will never grow a foot! Or someone who has gorgeous naturally curly hair - not even make up and hair artists can make my hair do that! Its pretty natural to feel a little twinge sometimes, so don't go beating yourself up about it!
What you CAN do, is stop watching!!! I've pretty much entirely stopped watching other girls - even for the sake of checking out traffic (if it looks busy in someone's room, then I go on and mine isn't, I'll feel bad. If it's not busy, then I start thinking I won't make any money. Lose-lose). If you are logging on and see someone and think "damn, I wish I had that" then accept that little feeling, then shake it off and move on. And do everything you can to try and get to where you want to be. You say you are jealous of the girls with great bodies - well, there are some things (height, proportions) that you can't change, but you can sure as hell create the best body you can within that!!
-
Re: Jealous of other cam girls
Quote:
too obese for the job
LMAO!!
I get called fat too but in a nice, endearing way, it's meant as a compliment! Believe it or not:D <3 fetish guys! 8)
I usually ignore assholes or ban them but I've read some hilarious responses to being called fat;D
-
Re: Jealous of other cam girls
Rather than feeling jealous, watch them.. pick up on what they do, little moves they make, how they speak, what they wear, the way their room is kitted out. Figure out what gets them business and them replicate it. I don't mean copy them totally, just.. use them as an example of what works, and aim to develop those qualities :)
-
Re: Jealous of other cam girls
LOL- OJenni!--what a dumbass. :P I think men are hilarious when they take you private just to knock your shit. It happened to me yesterday, too. I don't disclose my current location on cam, but a lot of the guys guess around where I grew up because of my voice. This guy takes me private and rambles on and on about how dirty "Jersey girls" are, and even if I moved out of there, he understands why I chose this as my job because I must have grown up in the "ghetto" and I don't understand what it is like to live with class.
HAHA. Ok, sucker, keep on trying to talk shit and save me while you give me all your money.
Really though, you shouldn't even be thinking about other girls to that point. You should just be motivating yourself to work harder. Focus on yourself. Don't bring in that negative energy and waste time by looking at other models making money when YOU should be making money.
-
Re: Jealous of other cam girls
When I see a gorgeous chica I don't hate I on her, I wanna be with her}:D
The chicas I long to look like/be like (every now and then, overall I'm pretty happy with myself) look nothing like anything I could ever hope to achieve...I'll never have mahogany skin and be 6 feet tall-it's just never gonna happen
I've been on the receiving end of cam-chica hate a few of times, and it's been chicas who aren't exactly at the top of their game, but probably would be if they spent more time working and less time trolling other chicas who are focusing on work.
OP, I'm not saying you're like one of the people I'm describing (if anything I think it's fantastic that you're actually examining these emotions), just that dwelling on negative feelings never has a productive or positive result. Honestly, doing p90x is probably a wicked idea, not just cuz it'll tone you up, but cuz it'll help you feel strong and healthy. I know for me getting in peak shape has really made me appreciate my body for what it can do, not for what it looks like
Beyond that, everyone above has posted some excellent advice. Stop watching other chicas, get on cam, and focus on how awesome you are as the $$$$ rolls in :)
peace and $$$$
-
Re: Jealous of other cam girls
I agree with everyone else who says stop watching. In the beginning, I was damn near obsessed with watching girls and it really was with good intentions. I was trying to figure this whole cam thing out. But honestly the more I think about it, there really is no reason to watch other girls that much. I used to watch for pointers but you can't take that many pointers from other girls without completely losing yourself and becoming a bad clone of the person you're imitating. Once you've watched a few girls a couple of times, you either have it or you don't. Yeah we can say "oh I'm checking my placement". Well you can check it all you want but it's not going to jump up just because you're watching other girls. The only thing that will increase placement is working more and making more money. Plus watching a girl who you're admittedly jealous of is just going to make you feel worse about yourself which will fuck with you on cam. You're going to be constantly wishing you were "smaller, blonder, perkier, bitcher, chattier, whatever". It's a lose/lose situation. Just quit watching. You know what she looks like. You know how she runs her room. You know all you need to know about her. Now acknowledge how gorgeous you are. Work on the things you want to change and then you'll make money and be just as awesome as her.
-
Re: Jealous of other cam girls
I don't get jealous. I get inspired. I have no desire to have the big career/fame that the top girls have, but I ADORE watching them/tipping/buying their gold shows and I love seeing them succeed and be their best. I don't have Ember Reigns' boobs, but I DO have her confidence and I glance flirty at the camera just as well as she does. I'll never have Diamond James' tight body and sleek hair, but I can (and do) emulate her awesome makeup and warm personality. Have fun with your cam persona! Be yourself, but those girls you get jealous of? Don't be afraid to draw a little star power inspiration from them.
-
Re: Jealous of other cam girls
I think if you just put your focus into your shows, the more compliments you will receive...the more compliments you receive, the better you will feel....hopefully to the point where you cant be bothered to troll other girls cams. Put more energy into yourself....in other words be a little self absorbed...it pays in this industry LOL
-
Re: Jealous of other cam girls
Turn that jealousy into motivation and inspiration
-
Re: Jealous of other cam girls
I agree, stop spending time into other girls room...Negative emotions and wasting time lurking aren't gonna bring in the $$$$$. Camming is more than looks, its your personality and confidence as well. If they can tell how much you dislike yourself, they will dislike you as well...For example, im short, I am an Acup, would like to be more toned but who cares. I'm the shit and I know it, and they know it too! Own that attitude! lol But seriously, just work on your confidence and soon you won't give a damn what the other girls are doing...Guys love different things...hell, fake it til you make it if u have to ;) good luck!
-
Re: Jealous of other cam girls
There's some great advice in this thread. Men are drawn to confidence, doesn't matter whether you're a size 2 or size 18, it's written all over your face. Checking placement and comparing yourself to over girls is distracting, damaging, and counterproductive. How are you going to make money in between all that worrying? Invest in yourself by doing some workouts, taking vitamins, or anything to boost that confidence and you'll find the rewards flowing to you tenfold :)
-
Re: Jealous of other cam girls
Im not the most secure person in the world... Ive wanted a boob job ever since I had kiddo at 19, Im hitting on 35 and super aware of my age, even though I look a lot younger, I *feel* my age...my knees click, I get sore and cant hold up like I used to, and Im terribly out of shape..speaking of which, I had the great misfortune of getting on the scale yesterday and finding out I had a pretty warped image of myself, and am 20lbs heavier than I thought I was. FML!!!!!!!!
BUT! When I look at other women, Ive never felt jealousy....just a lot of admiration and inspiration when I see one that I think is finer than all give out. Ive said it before, and its true...Im like a leech, I totally feed off of someone elses hard work and good fortune. In my mind, I really see it as, if she can do it, nothing is stopping me from doing it too, and I will bust my ass to get there. I ebb and flow though, Ive lost weight, then it creeps back on, I get all fit, then I get lazy again, I work like a crazy woman, then I lounge on the couch not feeling it, Ill do my hair and makeup just to go cook breakfast every morning, then one day find myself schelping out the house looking like whatnot.
The more I see and am around people I admire, the more I see what and where I want to be, and work to achieve that. And I would never for a minute hesitate to congratulate or be proud of someone for where they are or what they are doing...cause goodness knows, it feels great when someone notices my hard work too! Treat people how you want to be treated, be happy for others, and do your best to reach your goals. No room for jealousy in that equation! Ive always considered it a wasted emotion.
-
Re: Jealous of other cam girls
Make that jealousy work for you! While you are watching other girls and feeling that painful jealousy -- pull out a pen and paper and write down exactly what it is that is making you jealous. Don't worry about whether you are being petty or mean, just write it all down and put it somewhere that you won't lose it.
One or two days later while you are doing something you enjoy (like listening to music and having a cup of coffee) go back and read that piece of paper. You will probably laugh your ass off at how silly it all seems after the fact. It is hard to realize when you are there feeling the jealousy that emotions are not reality. If you can give it enough time that you can actually view your feelings in a logical manner, they are a lot less threatening.
Done laughing your ass off? Great! Now grab your pen because it is time to make another list. Now that you are able to look at what it is that you are jealous of without being overload by emotion, you can use your problem-solving skills to come up with solutions to what it is that bothering you.
The whole process ain't easy, but at least you end up being productive at the end of it. ;) Good luck!