Boyfriends visiting the club..
So my now boyfriend knows what I do and where I work. We never discussed the issue of him "droppin by" however he did and I felt very uncomfortable with it. I felt like I couldn't work. I didn't tell him to leave, but later he stated how he liked seeing me get my hustle on. /:O How do I tell him, I really don't want him visiting me without offending? Any advise?
Re: Boyfriends visiting the club..
Most clubs don't even let girls' boyfriends come in anyway. Just tell him that you mentioned him to another girl and word got back to the manger, and now he's not allowed in during your shifts.
Re: Boyfriends visiting the club..
My hubby only comes around every now and then to bring me food during long breaks; I go to his car and eat it there, he never comes in.
Re: Boyfriends visiting the club..
That could actually get you in trouble. Most clubs have a no boyfriends/husbands rule.
Re: Boyfriends visiting the club..
My bf comes in a lot. If it bothered me I'd tell him not to come on my shifts. Talk to him.
Re: Boyfriends visiting the club..
I told mine from the start he couldn't come in because I wouldn't be able to work when he was there.
I really can't afford to worry about him being offended.
Maybe tell him nicely what you wrote here, something along the lines of how it affects your money. If he cares about you he'll stop coming in. If he wants to make an issue of it, not cool. It's your workplace.
Re: Boyfriends visiting the club..
Mine could come in if he wanted, he is friends with the doorman, but he would never come in if i was at work. I told him straight from the beginning, its puts me off working and i dont make money. Not cause i dont like him seeing me work or cause im ashamed or talk dirty or anything, im just preoccupied when he's there, ive had exes in the past come to my club (when they were with me) and then get pissy because i wouldnt sit with them and talk! HELLO, IM AT WORK!! lol.
As a bouncer he understands and i have only very very rarely, and with express permission from him, gone to his clubs when he was at work. If we are both at work of an evening, one of the doormen will walk me to his club, if he hasnt finished i wait with the other doormen, if he finishes before me, he will wait for me to arrive at his club door, if he finishes much earlier than me, he goes home and i get a taxi.
The way i see it is, if i worked in an office, school, shop, any job really, it would be inappropriate for my SO to come and stand there and take up my time, it wouldnt be tolerated, as i am technically working for myself as a dancer i can not tolerate losing potential earnings cause i cant concentrate because my boyfriend is there. Him saying he liked seeing you hussle sorta indicates that he was watching you (which is undrstandable) and would explain why you felt uncomfortable and unable to work.
Tell him the truth, you have to be honest with him, hope it goes well xx
Re: Boyfriends visiting the club..
I tell mine in no uncertain terms to fuck off. Money is what makes the world go round.
Re: Boyfriends visiting the club..
Quote:
Originally Posted by
pruttyeyez
So my now boyfriend knows what I do and where I work. We never discussed the issue of him "droppin by" however he did and I felt very uncomfortable with it. I felt like I couldn't work. I didn't tell him to leave, but later he stated how he liked seeing me get my hustle on. /:O How do I tell him, I really don't want him visiting me without offending? Any advise?
Tell him that the club rules are that no significant others are allowed. Or the manager said so. There are only 1 or 2 clubs I work at that allow my girlfriend to come in. Most others always tell me she can't stay.
Re: Boyfriends visiting the club..
I had a boyfriend come in on a slow night. It was hard to hustle other guys while he was watching. Best leave him at home.
Re: Boyfriends visiting the club..
My husband usually comes in on Fridays after i've had a long week, he just hangs out and encourages me, it's very peaceful and I have a much better night when he's there. We've been married for almost ten years though, so no drama, and the management actually loves him.
Re: Boyfriends visiting the club..
My ex used to come in and one night he listened as a customer shared what he wanted to do to my ass........then he burned him with a cigarette. :rotfl: Yeah, not a great move him coming to visit. Best to nip that in the bud.
Re: Boyfriends visiting the club..
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Optimist
My ex used to come in and one night he listened as a customer shared what he wanted to do to my ass........then he burned him with a cigarette. :rotfl: Yeah, not a great move him coming to visit. Best to nip that in the bud.
lol. Yeah, i think its best to keep boyfriends away from customers, its another reason mine would never come in the club, but i like that if customers ask i have one who is not fictional who can appear to pick me up at the end of a shift if need be!
Re: Boyfriends visiting the club..
Thanks everyone for your feedback. We talked about it, and he understood my feelings. I'm sure glad it workout.
Re: Boyfriends visiting the club..
You can take him to the club when you're not working. That would be a nice compromise.
Re: Boyfriends visiting the club..
Yeah, taking him for a night out to a club is fun. Although when I took my partner out to a strip club (not my own) he was already getting jealous, comparing me to what a dancer does. Like, do you do what that girl does? Oh my gosh, don't tell me you dance that close to people at work...
Sigh...
Re: Boyfriends visiting the club..
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Melissa_Feet
You can take him to the club when you're not working. That would be a nice compromise.
I think this is the best thing for this type of situation. I kinda get a kick out of watching the girls tear apart my boyfriend anyway lol.