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Re: Why are so many wealthy white men not attracted to women of color?
Also, no offense to some of these posters here, but I think race *can* be a limiting factor in the adult industry.
At the massage parlor I used to work at, the owners explicitly mentioned that they ONLY hire white girls, because in their opinion, it's what the clientele wanted.
I didn't agree with that philosophy, but I didn't tell them, since I was making good money there and wanted to stay on their good side, lol.
But if the owners (a male and a female) saw it like that, how many others do too? It's not fair, I agree.
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Re: Why are so many wealthy white men not attracted to women of color?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
LibraSnake
Promise me you won't think I'm a racist for this...
But it's the stereotypes, unfortunately.
Black women are often stereotyped as loud/lazy/needy/demanding welfare queens, and to them, the fact that you're on a SD website reinforces that notion. EVEN THOUGH THAT'S NOT PROBABLY NOT TRUE.
Unfortunately, this doesn't tend to apply to women of other races.
White women seem to portray every dirty ol' man's fantasy of a hot college sorority girl. lol
Asians are seen as adorable little sex brides to purchase.
Latinas seem to either become lumped in the white or Asian category.
So maybe portray either the White or Asian image in your wording!
Hope this helps...but I don't know, since I'm White myself. :-X
It's always a bad sign when posts start out with "promise me you won't think I'm racist for this, but...." and then something blatantly racist suddenly appears.
I understand your point about how many people see the world through stereotypes, and that's not very useful, and often hostile. I agree. But your portrayal of the stereotypes clearly showed that you've already been co-opted by them.
For example, hateful stereotyping doesn't apply to women of other races? Really?
Do you honestly think white women are universally seen as hot college sorority girls?
If you're going to use words like "loud/lazy/needy/demanding" to refer to the WOC stereotype of women, how about an accurate portrayal of the white women stereotype? I mean one that does not portray them all as hot college sorority girls.
Here's one, just off the top of my head: Self-absorbed, spoiled, skinny, bratty, vain, racist, hateful, man-stealing, back-biting, anorexic, judgmental, cracker-ass bitches. And that's just one stereotype.
See my point?
Stereotypes are, unfortunately, applicable to every race. They are pernicious, hateful and unfair. But if you think for a moment that they don't apply to your own racial group -- or worse, apply to only a single racial group -- you are deeply and sadly mistaken.
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Re: Why are so many wealthy white men not attracted to women of color?
Trailer park! Dont forget trailer park!! :D
Okay, I can totally laugh at this, and I hope y'all see the humour in this too.. But growing up I always got teased that I dont talk/act/whatever like a black girl, Im whiter than my white friends, etc blah blah blah. Very annoying. Anyway, when I was in the military, I had to move out of the barracks, and the only place I could afford was a single wide in an honest to goodness just like how you see in the movies, beer can wind chimes and all trailer park.
One day, some guy said how I talk so proper and act white. I told him, well...you might be on to something...I do live in a trailer park. He kind of gave me this blank look, and was like...well no, I didnt mean that kind of white person. And I told him, wait, so Im not the bad stereotype of a black person, so Im acting white, but Im not the bad stereotype of a white person so.......does that mean Im black again?! and gave him my best "Im so confused" expression :D
He was all irritated with me cause apparently I didnt get it and was taking his compliment the wrong way...
Compliments like that can be shoved in dark tight places...
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Re: Why are so many wealthy white men not attracted to women of color?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
All Good Things
It's always a bad sign when posts start out with "promise me you won't think I'm racist for this, but...." and then something blatantly racist suddenly appears.
I understand your point about how many people see the world through stereotypes, and that's not very useful, and often hostile. I agree. But your portrayal of the stereotypes clearly showed that you've already been co-opted by them.
For example, hateful stereotyping doesn't apply to women of other races? Really?
Do you honestly think white women are universally seen as hot college sorority girls?
If you're going to use words like "loud/lazy/needy/demanding" to refer to the WOC stereotype of women, how about an accurate portrayal of the white women stereotype? I mean one that does not portray them all as hot college sorority girls.
Here's one, just off the top of my head: Self-absorbed, spoiled, skinny, bratty, vain, racist, hateful, man-stealing, back-biting, anorexic, judgmental, cracker-ass bitches. And that's just one stereotype.
See my point?
Stereotypes are, unfortunately, applicable to every race. They are pernicious, hateful and unfair. But if you think for a moment that they don't apply to your own racial group -- or worse, apply to only a single racial group -- you are deeply and sadly mistaken.
Did I ever say that negative stereotypes don't exist for other races? No.
But when you look at the disproportionate success rates based on race, all else equal, it's a valid assumption that people are cherry-picking the negative stereotypes of black women, and viewing other races with the less negative stereotypes.
If everyone faced an equal amount of negative judgment, everyone would be in the same boat.
I see a lot of black men on these SD sites, but they don't ever show interest - it's just as possible that they're negatively stereotyping me for being white.
I'm not being racist, I'm honestly just stating the obvious. I'm sick of all this PC crap.
If people are doing unfair things to people, it's likely for unfair reasons.
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Re: Why are so many wealthy white men not attracted to women of color?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
LibraSnake
Also, no offense to some of these posters here, but I think race *can* be a limiting factor in the adult industry.
At the massage parlor I used to work at, the owners explicitly mentioned that they ONLY hire white girls, because in their opinion, it's what the clientele wanted.
I didn't agree with that philosophy, but I didn't tell them, since I was making good money there and wanted to stay on their good side, lol.
But if the owners (a male and a female) saw it like that, how many others do too? It's not fair, I agree.
I once auditioned at a massage parlor that supposedly offered private dances and they asked me on the phone if I was white so I do know racism exists. It's unfair but one of the reasons some companies don't hire woc is because the clients don't like it for some reason. When I ran an entertainment agency I got easily 20 calls for white girls versus one for blacks and the sad thing is I had a beautiful black girl who later went into porn and adult modeling.
I'm white but not sure I was ever thought of as a college girl, even in college.
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Re: Why are so many wealthy white men not attracted to women of color?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
LibraSnake
Did I ever say that negative stereotypes don't exist for other races? No.
That's exactly what you said. Right here:
Quote:
Originally Posted by
LibraSnake
Black women are often stereotyped as loud/lazy/needy/demanding welfare queens.....Unfortunately, this doesn't tend to apply to women of other races.
The only way you would think that negative stereotypes "tend not to appy to other races" is that you are not of any one of those races, don't experience the stereotype or pay the price of the prejudice.
And forgive me, it's just idiotic (sorry) to say things like "disproportionate success rates based on race, all else equal..." because all else is dramatically unequal. It's also ignoring the obvious, which is that "disproportionate success rates based on race" correlate very closely to disproportionately crappy shithole environments in which many minorities find themselves and out of which they need to drag themselves against what are often astronomically poor odds.
If you are of Caucasian extraction in the U.S., it's fundamentally impossible for you to understand what it's like to be a minority, and even more impossible for you to see or appreciate what the world looks like through their eyes.
If you go live in Japan for a while, it's a good first step to understanding what it's like to be thought of as a lazy, unreliable, self-centered piece of shit, because in Japan, that's how many older, traditional Japanese see the gaijin. That's how they see you.
It's a useful wake-up call for people who are used to being on top of the world and suddenly finding themselves looked down upon.
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Re: Why are so many wealthy white men not attracted to women of color?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
All Good Things
That's exactly what you said. Right here:
The only way you would think that negative stereotypes "tend not to appy to other races" is that you are not of any one of those races, don't experience the stereotype or pay the price of the prejudice.
Context, context. That comment was pretty obviously made within the context of the average SD/SB site - like I clarified, in the outside world, nobody is spared from negative judgment.
Quote:
And forgive me, it's just idiotic (sorry) to say things like "disproportionate success rates based on race, all else equal..." because all else is dramatically unequal. It's also ignoring the obvious, which is that "disproportionate success rates based on race" correlate very closely to disproportionately crappy shithole environments in which many minorities find themselves and out of which they need to drag themselves against what are often astronomically poor odds.
Ok, I think you're cherry-picking parts of my posts in order to have an excuse to go off on your own tangent. I said "all else equal" in terms of income, level of education, location, etc. For example, two doctors both making $300K/yr, both living in Palo Alto, both with MDs from Stanford Med School, etc. Hopefully and likely, these studies regarding success rates of dating sites control for all those other variables in order to calculate the statistical influence of race, and race alone.
Are you telling me that I should assume that the white doctor's black peer obviously overcame astronomical odds, grew up in a shitty neighborhood, etc, just because he's black? Do you want to be judged like that?
Even if you're "going by the statistics" - well, going by the statistics, African Americans are incarcerated at higher rates than any other race - would you be OK with people going around judging black people as criminals?
Quote:
If you are of Caucasian extraction in the U.S., it's fundamentally impossible for you to understand what it's like to be a minority, and even more impossible for you to see or appreciate what the world looks like through their eyes.
Quote:
If you go live in Japan for a while, it's a good first step to understanding what it's like to be thought of as a lazy, unreliable, self-centered piece of shit, because in Japan, that's how many older, traditional Japanese see the gaijin. That's how they see you.
It's a useful wake-up call for people who are used to being on top of the world and suddenly finding themselves looked down upon.
With this portion of your post, you're basically admitting that blacks are viewed more negatively than others (or at least whites) are in America. And that contradicts not only what you chided me for, but with what I believe as well - that negative stereotypes ARE inflicted onto other groups of people, it just tends to differ by microcosm.
Do you think a strange, white man is going to be viewed favorably in Detroit or Compton? Yes, I realize that people in various parts of the world will view my race less favorably than they view others.
But seriously now, we have a black president. If this whole country "looked down upon" black people, Obama wouldn't be in office. Hell, black people, ALL ELSE EQUAL (and if you want me to automatically assume that they're the pitiable victims of poverty, you'll have to let me also assume that they're criminals), have certain advantages.
They've got affirmative action in their favor. They are protected by anti-discrimination laws (whereas a white person complaining about not getting hired by an organization comprised of other races would probably get laughed out of court). They're freer to express pride for their race - consider all the Black Clubs on campuses - whereas if I tried to start a "White Club", it'd be considered a chapter of the KKK.
etc etc. I'm not saying subtle racism doesn't exist - it does, and it's hard to prevent it.
But overall, my point of all this is, you can't complain that black people are "looked down upon" in America yet get upset at me for suggesting that maybe it's because people think of them more negatively in certain contexts - it doesn't even make sense, even if I made that remark regarding their reputation in America as a whole, much less in the microcosm that is a random sugar daddy dating site.
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Re: Why are so many wealthy white men not attracted to women of color?
I'll try to be brief, as the longer these posts get, the fewer people read them, assuming anybody is reading them at all.
I get your point about the context being SD/SB sites. But you must admit your original post flat out stated that the only race where negative stereotyping occurred in the minds of SDs was with WOC, and that the other stereotypes were all positive.
This is simply not true. If you were to magically enter the minds of all the men posting there, I think you would be shocked at the level of stereotyping on ALL races. What was even more surprising was that you suggested that Latinas had no relevant negative stereotypes, that they fit in between two other positive ones. That's a true WTF moment.
Anyway, the only point I've been trying to make here is that all races are stereotyped -- mostly negatively -- and it furthers no cause to pretend that they are not. It's pure speculation as to what goes through men's minds on a SD site, but I am quite sure I'm on firmer ground by claiming that the full spectrum of negative stereotypes is at work there, rather than the notion that the WOC are the sole targets of negativity.
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Re: Why are so many wealthy white men not attracted to women of color?
I went to a majority black high school and the funny thing is this was when the Cosby Show was huge and most of my classmates were exactly like them. Most of them have done well and one classmate is a top name plastic surgeon to the stars in California. While yes they will encounter racism being black, they will not have the same obstacles as a black man in the ghetto. Yes they were city folk too, but once again not all city folk deal with the same things. Btw, there were lower class black students too and they hated white people and would always attack white students. The ironic thing? many of both my black classmates and the majority of my white classmates are now Republicans and anti affirmative action. When I was on the newspaper senior year it was taken over by a group of anti white students and wanted to make it only black stories. When I suggested doing an article about Revolutionary War hero Casimir Pulaski, I was told no because it wasn't their culture. Sorry, but I am part Polish and it is my culture.
I don't look at any race and judge, I judge based on many factors. The majority of low class I've known by far were white and I have many black friends and relatives and not one was low class. When I needed job assistance before dancing I was denied and that is racism as well.
Getting back to the main point, yes there is racism against black women but in my personal opinion so many were obese yet didn't realize this. Fat women are more of a fetish and to some people it is repulsive.
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Re: Why are so many wealthy white men not attracted to women of color?
So I guess I live in a weird part of the country then LOL?
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Re: Why are so many wealthy white men not attracted to women of color?
I don't know this is a weird area to me, or maybe it's weird because I live here who knows. I just know that while there is diversity, some clubs still don't hire black girls that are hot while hiring fat slob white women.
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Re: Why are so many wealthy white men not attracted to women of color?
I absolutely love this thread! This issue has been on my mind for sometime now. I get mixed results when it comes to attracting white men and my different buisnesses. Ive found that in phone sex that most of my best callers are black. They're loyal and come back often. Whenever I get a white caller I can almost count on them wanting to use racial slurs or they want a ghetto bitch, which I am not. I once had a guy tell me that I wasnt black. Say what? On the other hand when I dance my best tips come from white men and they tend to be a lot more respectful than black men. Its weird how it works out. But when Im out and about just living my life, mature white men approach me all the time. I live in Miami and its all mixed up down here. I seem to be very popular with the Jewish crowd.
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Re: Why are so many wealthy white men not attracted to women of color?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Lovelyme
I have all that but none of it is fake. I'm black. I have seen girls in my area with my look - sort of and they're the ones banking at the strip clubs. It urks me when people play the race card - it's annoying.
Uh and the adult industry gives them an OUT to get out of their comfort zone so this doesn't make much sense. Everyone isn't racist. I have wealthy clients that aren't into hip hop but will tell me ooh turn the player to whatever you like. These men are willig to accommodate US. Why? Sex sells. We make them do what we want with our looks/ways -- that's how it works and not the other way around. I feel that the majority of the posts on this thread is misleading. If you're ugly/unattractive, men of ALL races won't be into you. simple.
I totally agree! Most men want a "getaway" from their ordinary life. It is refreshing for professional men, wealthy men, etc. that are always living "the appropriate" life that society mandates for them, to find that spark, fun, and adventure that they are missing from their "regular" lives.
I dated a man who was a stuck up, so serious and so " proper" when he was around his people, a pure asshole (just like all his friends in his circle). On his "normal" day to day, with his circle he will listen to jazz, instrumental classical music, etc. Oh boy, but he loved to pick me up and my girlfriends (2 of them gorgeous black ladies) and he was always ready for us to make him jam to hip hop, and club music. He would laugh, dance, go crazy, a total transformation!
I am Latina, and my rich white and Latin guy friends love my black girlfriends. Hey I had play matchmaker for them! A couple just practically fell head over heels over my black girlfriends as soon as they meet them. So not every white man is a racist.
Not because they are not attracted to you means that they are racist. Attraction is...a magnetism, you just can't control who you are attracted to. I am not attracted to bold headed guys or guys with beer bellies, but I have friends that have bold headed friends and friends with beer bellies , that does not mean I am discriminating, I am just not attracted to them.
I am not saying that there are no racist men out there. But you can't judge every white man as a racist.
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Re: Why are so many wealthy white men not attracted to women of color?
WOW this thread blew up...anyway I'm sorry if I offended any white people. I just came back from a cruise and a lot of the old white guys were on me like white on rice so I was certainly wrong about all white men not liking black chicks. HOWEVER one thing that irritates me, and perhaps I should know better by now, is that its very hard to have discussions about racism on sites like this or with white people period because SOME of you refuse to acknowledge white privilege and always have to find a way to blame the victim. "oh well you shouldn't be acting ghetto" " its his preference" SHUT UP! racism is fucking alive and real okay bitches?? >:(
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Re: Why are so many wealthy white men not attracted to women of color?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
vixenluv
WOW this thread blew up...anyway I'm sorry if I offended any white people. I just came back from a cruise and a lot of the old white guys were on me like white on rice so I was certainly wrong about all white men not liking black chicks. HOWEVER one thing that irritates me, and perhaps I should know better by now, is that its very hard to have discussions about racism on sites like this or with white people period because SOME of you refuse to acknowledge white privilege and always have to find a way to blame the victim. "oh well you shouldn't be acting ghetto" " its his preference" SHUT UP! racism is fucking alive and real okay bitches?? >:(
This post is so wrong that its so right. You start off with an apology but half way through you changed you're mind and said fuck it!
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Re: Why are so many wealthy white men not attracted to women of color?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
vixenluv
racism is fucking alive and real okay bitches??
So? People have a right to their opinions.
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Re: Why are so many wealthy white men not attracted to women of color?
i truly believe it is how you carry yourself and how you present yourself. a lot of old white men are attracted to me.
unfortunatly, when one thinks of a black or ethnic women- a lot of stereotypes come to mind. a wealthy white man will not respond to an ethnic woman who has a picture posted of theirselves in a ghetto position, outrageous weaves and not so classy outfit.
it is really how your present yourself.
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Re: Why are so many wealthy white men not attracted to women of color?
This thread is a waste of fucking time.
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Re: Why are so many wealthy white men not attracted to women of color?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
vixenluv
WOW this thread blew up...anyway I'm sorry if I offended any white people. I just came back from a cruise and a lot of the old white guys were on me like white on rice so I was certainly wrong about all white men not liking black chicks. HOWEVER one thing that irritates me, and perhaps I should know better by now, is that its very hard to have discussions about racism on sites like this or with white people period because SOME of you refuse to acknowledge white privilege and always have to find a way to blame the victim. "oh well you shouldn't be acting ghetto" " its his preference" SHUT UP! racism is fucking alive and real okay bitches?? >:(
Of course there is racism and yes some men (white and other races)seem to prefer white women. We've all seen the rich black man who then married a white women. However, some of the problems that black women (notice I said SOME?)deal with are their fault. I have seen some black women who refuse to take care of their bodies or allow men to take advantage of them, including having babies with men who don't value them enough to marry them. Yes all women deal with this issue, but it is more prevalent with non white women. And yes this is unpc to say but it is easier for an attractive classy black woman to make money than it is for one who doesn't look classy, but not always true with white women. I am not justifying racism and yes it is a problem in society but some people (of all races)don't better themselves.
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Re: Why are so many wealthy white men not attracted to women of color?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
vixenluv
...HOWEVER one thing that irritates me, and perhaps I should know better by now, is that its very hard to have discussions about racism on sites like this or with white people period because SOME of you refuse to acknowledge white privilege and always have to find a way to blame the victim. "oh well you shouldn't be acting ghetto" " its his preference" SHUT UP! racism is fucking alive and real okay bitches?? >:(
This reminds me of a conversation I had with a dancer in a club in Queens about 5 years ago. To preface this, I am indeed one of those guys who has certain preferences, which run to the Italian and Latina varieties. With that in mind, the encounter went as follows:
A black dancer came up to me and asked if I was looking for company, to which I responded that I was not at the moment. Over the next hour or so, two different girls, one white and another Latina, spent some time with me. Later on, the first dancer came back around and once again asked if I was looking for company, to which I responded that I was not. She then plopped down in the seat next to me and started grilling me.
Her: If you are not looking for company, why did you let those other girls sit with you?
Me: Because I felt like it at those moments.
Her: Really? Is it because you don't like black girls?
Me: Well, if we have to get into this, I do have certain preferences.
Her: And what are those?
Me: I tend to like Latinas and Italian girls.
Her: Well, you don't even know my background.
Me: Ok, but do I really need to? I am looking for something else. Why is that such a problem for you?
Her: I think that you're racist.
Me: Think what you want. I like what I like. Sorry.
Her: Yup, you're racist. Oh, and by the way, I'm Cuban.
And then she stormed off.
Now I suppose that I can understand her frustration, but I just wasn't attracted to her. Idk, but this was a real WTF moment for me. Am I a racist simply because I'm not attracted to certain types of girls? Is that supposed to be some function of white privilege?
Now I'm not discounting the fact that racism still exists in certain facets of society, but I'm just not sure how one applies the concept to the laws of attraction.
Anyway, just my :twocents:
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Re: Why are so many wealthy white men not attracted to women of color?
Jeeeeez, its really all so wild really. I like blondes and gingers. Does that mean Im "reverse racist" because Im not into black men? Nope. Does that mean I think brunettes are bad in any way? Nope. Ive dated black men, and Ive dated brunettes...but Ill be honest and say that getting to know them, and their personality is what attracted me to them, but of the blondes I dated it was lust at first sight... I cant help it. My first best friend in nursery school was a blonde boy (they called us chocolate vanilla swirl cause we were always together lol), my first crush was a german exchange student. And gingers have no mercy with me...I cant stand my ex, but whenever I see him, I want to do dirty things to him so I completely avoid him. Who knows why or how or what the whole chemistry of attraction thing is, but acting like someone is racist because they have a preference is pretty crazy.
Personally, I would hate it if every single guy I came across was attracted to me....I have a hard enough time with the ones who are.... Id never be able to leave the house and get any errands done in peace...:D
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Re: Why are so many wealthy white men not attracted to women of color?
Agree with both posts. I prefer dark men like Latins, Italians, Hispanic, etc yet blonde haired, pale skin men do nothing for me. I am dark haired, dark eyed and dark skin and guess what? many guys rejected me while dancing for this.
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Re: Why are so many wealthy white men not attracted to women of color?
*sigh* I have no problem with people who have "preferences". I know every black chick in the world isnt some underrated stunner that people are too stupid to appreciate. I GET IT. Some black women are fat, ghetto, and bald headed. I GET IT. However to try and compare your little preference for latinas or green eyes or whatever to racism is retarded. Just like you all have your opinions I have mine and that is anyone who cant find one single person of a different or their own race attractive is probably a undercover racist/psycho. Maybe I am just a bit more well traveled and cultured than some of you pink toes but I have seen pretty and ugly from all walks on life in all different shapes sizes colors and ages. I dont really like to hear people bash and call any group of people unattactive because i know its not true. Stop acting like I said every white man has to worship black women.
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Re: Why are so many wealthy white men not attracted to women of color?
and to any white folks reading this and thinking all black women are angry. kiss my ass.
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Re: Why are so many wealthy white men not attracted to women of color?
My experience with wealthy white men is that they love me. I had a profile on wealthymen.com and 99% of my messages (and there were 5-10 a day) were from white men. Initially that made me uncomfortable because i've grown up in a predominantly black area and have never been around older white men. They have proven to be some of the best and most generous men I've met. Also in my dancing, 99% of my repeat and customers who $pend are white men.
I'm 5'5, 36D-29-44 ... so I'm a curvy girl too but they love it. I'd have to agree with the comments about the demographical area.