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sexuality confusion.
I'm 19 (soon to be 20) and a virgin. And I have no desire to have sex. But when it comes to females, I'm all for it. I haven't had a bf since sophomore year in high school (now a sophomore in college). When my parents harass me about not bringing a bf home from college, I always tell them it's because they're no good at my school. I always lump all the romantically interested boys into the friend zone until they eventually lose interest. I have gone on dates with women and men and always enjoy the dates with women more and usually feel connected but I suppress it. I've once had a close friend tell me I'm a "true lesbian" because I've never had sex with a boy and don't care to.. idk..anyone have any input?:-\
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Re: sexuality confusion.
In my crass and unrefined opinion, it seems to me you're overly concerned about being pressured to put a label on your sexual preference and you don't have to. You do not have to accept a predefined sexual identity you're not comfortable with for the sake of allowing others to comfortable categorize you because in the end, it won't really bring any greater understanding since labels like "lesbian" have stereotypes attached to them and that just serves complicates things. As is evident by your dilemma, you already feel the effects of having to fit into a box (i.e. I believe being called a "true lesbian" is distressing because it's not that you're not attracted to men; you just don't want a sexual relationship with them at this time).
So in summary, my advice would be going with what feels right for YOU and not what you think is acceptable to other people. You don't have to have sex with a man just to prove to yourself that you're attracted to them and you don't have to force yourself into a hetero relationship if you're much more interested in pursuing a homo one. You also don't have to "check a box" so to say and identify as lesbian, pansexual, bisexual, queer or what have you. It's all about what you're comfortable with. You have nothing to prove to anyone. Period.
(and I'm sure someone with much more sage advice will chime in and help you reach a better path to conclusion, but I hope this helps)
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Re: sexuality confusion.
thank you both :) very insightful and very appreciated.