Thinking about telling siblings about my job
So my brother and I are really close. He is super chill and really supportive. He just turned 18 (so did my sister) and now that he's in town I kind of feel like I want to be honest with him.
How would you tell your younger siblings? I don't want to lie anymore but I don't want to freak them out either.
Re: Thinking about telling siblings about my job
Why do you even feel like bringing it up? In my world, it's a 'need to know basic only'.
Re: Thinking about telling siblings about my job
honestly its a bad idea.
I'd tell them you do affiliate marketing or something. (which you actually should be doing since most sites give big $ for affiliate joins).
Re: Thinking about telling siblings about my job
Sad face :(
I guess I just don't like lying. It feels so dirty! I guess you guys are right though, I mean it doesn't hurt anyone to not tell the truth. I guess it's just that I don't feel any negative way about camming. I feel VERY negative about lying. I need to get over it I guess. :(
Re: Thinking about telling siblings about my job
At the end of the day, you know your siblings, and we don't. It depends on what kind of relationship you have and what kind of people they are. You need to think about how they will react, and also if they might pass this information on. A bit like how a guy should only ask his girlfriend to marry him when he knows she'll say yes.
Re: Thinking about telling siblings about my job
I wouldn't do it. Especially with your brother. He's at the age where he probably looks at internet porn all the time, and knowing you're a part of "that world" might freak him out. You also have to factor in how your siblings will feel about sharing such a heavy secret. In an ideal world, our camming wouldn't affect anyone but ourselves, but in reality, it's a whole other ball game for people who are close to sex workers to come to terms with it. And not only will they have to deal with that but they'll have to deal with it in silence because they want to keep their sister's secret. Camming and stripping is something I might tell my sister about one day, after I've quit and we're old biddies talking about the good ol' days of our youth. But right now I don't want her to feel awkward about it or put the burden on her of keeping it a secret from our parents or anyone else.
Re: Thinking about telling siblings about my job
Aren't you a new camgirl? Honestly, I would not do it. Mostly if you have only been camming for a few months... I would only consider telling family (like my mom..) if I had hit it HUGE on MFC or something. I'm talking 25k+ a month huge.
When I first joined SW and started camming I posted a similar thread asking how I should go about telling my sometimes very over-reactive and judgemental gossip queen bestfriend about the fact that I am now camming.
It was laurielegs who knocked some sense into me and said "Uhh, why does she HAVE to know at all, you are just going to cause problems for yourself" and to this day, Laurie, THANK YOU for that, because if I HAD told her I don't think life would be as peaceful as it is right now and I'd be dealing with a lot of unecessary drama/gossip... frankly EVERYONE where I live that knows this girl would probably know by now IF I had told her, since as we all know, juicy gossip creates the domino effect.
I understand you want to be honest, I am not a person who lies.. I like to let people know what is going on... but with this... it's just not worth the risk, really.
Think about it, yes your brother is very supportive of YOU as the person you are, but does he really want to know his sister is masturbating for random dudes on the internet?? I mean, he probably watches porn too, and the second you tell him, no matter how much he loves you, he will see you differently to some extent, even if he accepts it.
Re: Thinking about telling siblings about my job
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Aurora_Sunset
I wouldn't do it. Especially with your brother. He's at the age where he probably looks at internet porn all the time, and knowing you're a part of "that world" might freak him out. You also have to factor in how your siblings will feel about sharing such a heavy secret. In an ideal world, our camming wouldn't affect anyone but ourselves, but in reality, it's a whole other ball game for people who are close to sex workers to come to terms with it. And not only will they have to deal with that but they'll have to deal with it in silence because they want to keep their sister's secret. Camming and stripping is something I might tell my sister about one day, after I've quit and we're old biddies talking about the good ol' days of our youth. But right now I don't want her to feel awkward about it or put the burden on her of keeping it a secret from our parents or anyone else.
Sold, I never even considered that.
Re: Thinking about telling siblings about my job
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Peachesxo
Aren't you a new camgirl? Honestly, I would not do it. Mostly if you have only been camming for a few months... I would only consider telling family (like my mom..) if I had hit it HUGE on MFC or something. I'm talking 25k+ a month huge.
When I first joined SW and started camming I posted a similar thread asking how I should go about telling my sometimes very over-reactive and judgemental gossip queen bestfriend about the fact that I am now camming.
It was laurielegs who knocked some sense into me and said "Uhh, why does she HAVE to know at all, you are just going to cause problems for yourself" and to this day, Laurie, THANK YOU for that, because if I HAD told her I don't think life would be as peaceful as it is right now and I'd be dealing with a lot of unecessary drama/gossip... frankly EVERYONE where I live that knows this girl would probably know by now IF I had told her, since as we all know, juicy gossip creates the domino effect.
I understand you want to be honest, I am not a person who lies.. I like to let people know what is going on... but with this... it's just not worth the risk, really.
Think about it, yes your brother is very supportive of YOU as the person you are, but does he really want to know his sister is masturbating for random dudes on the internet?? I mean, he probably watches porn too, and the second you tell him, no matter how much he loves you, he will see you differently to some extent, even if he accepts it.
I've been doing this for three years, just took a long break and came back about 3 months ago. I still feel totally newbish though.
Ugh, you guys are sooooo right, I'm actually really glad I posted this because I could not have made those points to myself in the mindset I'm in. I want to be close to my family right now, and I don't see my job as something "gross", but I didn't even think that they damn sure will. It's not that they'd judge me, and that's what I was thinking about, it's that they'd feel uncomfortable with the knowledge.
I honestly now can see how BAD this could be for our relationship and for them in general. Thank you guys so much.
**Hormonal tears of gratitude**
Re: Thinking about telling siblings about my job
In my experience, telling family hasn't gone well. I tried to lend my brother money when he needed it and he wouldn't take it because he called it dirty money. I think he's looked down on my ever since.
Re: Thinking about telling siblings about my job
Also, didn't you say you're pregnant? Family might react much differently then you expect them to when there is a baby (fetus?) involved. It just stirs something up in people. They might start telling you that you are hurting the baby, corrupting the purity of your unborn child, or some other ridiculous and hurtful bs.
I understand that it feels good to come clean and unload the burden of a secret, but.... Not a good idea in this case.
Either way, looks like you've already made the (correct, IMO) decision to keep it to yourself, so additional comments are moot. But anytime you get that feeling to unload or talk, or vent, we are here for you. Leave your family members out if it until you have a really compelling reason to tell them.
*Hugs!*
Re: Thinking about telling siblings about my job
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Jessica1001
Also, didn't you say you're pregnant? Family might react much differently then you expect them to when there is a baby (fetus?) involved. It just stirs something up in people. They might start telling you that you are hurting the baby, corrupting the purity of your unborn child, or some other ridiculous and hurtful bs.
I understand that it feels good to come clean and unload the burden of a secret, but.... Not a good idea in this case.
Either way, looks like you've already made the (correct, IMO) decision to keep it to yourself, so additional comments are moot. But anytime you get that feeling to unload or talk, or vent, we are here for you. Leave your family members out if it until you have a really compelling reason to tell them.
*Hugs!*
Yeah a big ""reason" for wanting to tell them was because I was considering telling the rest of the family because I didn't want them to find out after the baby comes and I not know how they'll react. If they acted shitty I was planning on moving to avoid bullshit. But I'll just avoid bullshit by not telling them and just realize that if shit comes up later I'll deal and be okay, but I don't need to bring it on myself.
Re: Thinking about telling siblings about my job
i told my super close & supportive , older. brother....i tell him a lot but not evvvverything just things that i would only trust him with like....me wanting to strip lol. i have since told more friends as i thought more about it & got more comfortable with the idea. & it helps that my brothers opinion of strippers is comparable to mine though...
Re: Thinking about telling siblings about my job
the longer you do this you realize that it is easier to just keep the big secret to yourself.
Re: Thinking about telling siblings about my job
In my experience over 10 yrs.. I felt same as you.. i don't think negatively about camming but others do.. being honest has only hurt me.. in fact I try to lie about everything as much as possible...LOL...I realized over the years honesty is NOT the best policy with virtually everything and anything. Don't bother to tell.. I regret being honest with everyone i have been..
Quote:
Originally Posted by
drearea
Sad face :(
I guess I just don't like lying. It feels so dirty! I guess you guys are right though, I mean it doesn't hurt anyone to not tell the truth. I guess it's just that I don't feel any negative way about camming. I feel VERY negative about lying. I need to get over it I guess. :(