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Taking a break..
So I quit from my club in July, and haven't been back since, I'm in school and its almost impossible....but I have a "so called regular non-sex job" now, and its really weird. I make nothing....and I don't know how to deal with it. Also, the more I worked at clubs, afterwards Im a lot more promiscuous....I don't try to be but I find myself in a lot of casual sexual situations, that I find ok. I made out with several guys at a party and my friends were like "oh my god" ....and since they don;'t know I seduced for a living ....Its just like...Im not really sure how to act....differently? Maybe for my personality type....I might not be able to be "normal" after being in the industry.....Or it might have to do with some shit I went through as a kid? I dont know.
To clarify, I never did anything extra with my customers, but I wonder if the job itself made me "whatever" about sex more than the regular joe/joanna lol
Does anyone understand what I'm saying?
I feel like going back to stripping because Im broke, but Im not sure if its going to make me worse or not...
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Re: Taking a break..
what is normal? so you are.."worse" for being more sexual? says who, patriarchal society? yes i am a lot more comfortable with sex and nudity after stripping, but i consider that a plus almost like an eye-opene, and it actually making me see through the bullshit and doing what i want without getting giggly and puritanical about sex and nudity. your sex life is your own business, and if you are ok with how you are, whose to tell you that is isn't normal or right? two consenting adults, whatever, i say. people change, and every new experience or job can change us, i really don't see how being more sexual qualifies as being "worse" if YOU are ok with it. screw your friends, they are sounding like judgemental drama queens right about now from what i've read.
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Re: Taking a break..
Nothing wrong w/ casual sex, as long as all parties consent & you're safe -- but if you're concerned abt it, I might back off a bit. Ask yourself why you're concerned -- is it b/c of yor friends' reactions? Obviously if you've kept them in the dark abt dancing, this free-er side of you may come as a shock to them. If their reactions are coming from a judgmental place, I say they can bugger off, but -- just playing devil's advocate -- if they are coming from a place of concern for your safety, then their opinions might be worth taking into consideration.
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Re: Taking a break..
when you say "some shit i went through as a kid," i imagine you're implying abuse of some sort. i have many friends who were victims of abuse (sexual and otherwise) who do "act promiscuously," i imagine as a way to show themselves (subconsciously) they are no longer afraid of the opposite sex/sex itself. if this is the case, i would look closer at and get therapy for your childhood experiences, and perhaps this would shed more light on your behavior.
regardless of that, i don't think sex and having it is bad. but you'll find that on stripperweb, most of us are going to feel that way--we are forced to be more progressive about women's sexuality based on what we do for a living.
outside of the club though, people are much slower to catch on. and personally, i think there is something to be said to value yourself enough to not just give attention to anyone--inside AND outside of the club. just like customers, i expect my sexual partners (and anyone else in my life) to behave and treat me well. but if you're doing it just for fun, and you are safe, the situation is consensual for all parties, and it's not for any form of self-validation, enjoy yourself. but choose your friends wisely.