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don't what to make of this man? potential client
Hey ladies,
So I'm a bit confused as to what to do with this guy.
He contacted me I think two weeks ago and wanted to do an 8 hour booking at a very expensive hotel but I turned him down because I was traveling that weekend. Then he said he was going on a business trip to Paris and would I accompany him for 6 days, he's some kind of international banker like every client in London. I thought about it and turned him down just because there was no way for us to meet before he left for the trip.
He called me again today and said that he is planning a two week trip for August and would I like to accompany him. I said I was uncomfortable with the time period because we don't know each other, but that if he wanted to do a weekend away that would be fine. He asked me how much it would be and I quoted a high # ($5,000) to which he asked me if that would be all because he would expect my full attention for three days so I increased to $8,000 and said I would need a deposit of $3,500 before the trip began. He said that was fine and that he would just give me the deposit now and in the meantime he wants us to text and instant message to get to know each other before the trip.
Things that make me nervous about him:
-the fact that he wants to go on such a long trip with someone he hasn't met
-the fact that he is so busy that we can't seem to have an in-person meeting
Things that make think he is legit:
-the fact he mentioned giving me a deposit immediately (he actually brought it up before me) and is willing to give it to me now in advance
-he seems to have done this before with a couple other ladies, he says he prefers to stick to one escort and had a girl who traveled with him for a year on business trips but that her visa expired so he is now looking for someone new
-when I speak to him he sounds educated and intelligent and he isn't bragging about how much money he has
I can't tell if I should take him seriously. Is there any danger in me giving him my bank details for a transfer just to see if he actually sends it through? I don't want to pass up what could potentially be a lot of money because working in this industry has made me so jaded, but I also don't want to get my hopes up and be made a fool of.
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Re: don't what to make of this man? potential client
NEVER ever give out your banking information.
Sounds like a con job to me. Offering you big money to gain your trust so you will hand over banking info.
Reads like a total con job. Be careful.
Sam
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Re: don't what to make of this man? potential client
^I don't know what he could do with it though, I mean people give their banking info out all the time in the UK. The photographer who did my photos gave me his bank info so I could pay him, same with my PS, my flatmates. He would need my account number and that's it. I guess alternatively I could ask him to do paypal.
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Re: don't what to make of this man? potential client
Quote:
Originally Posted by
audrey_k
^I don't know what he could do with it though, I mean people give their banking info out all the time in the UK. The photographer who did my photos gave me his bank info so I could pay him, same with my PS, my flatmates. He would need my account number and that's it. I guess alternatively I could ask him to do paypal.
Don't do paypal, their 'dispute' process is just as bad as chargebacks with credit cards. Also, they'll keep your money if they figure out you're an escort.
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Re: don't what to make of this man? potential client
^thanks. I did a search and someone suggested using prepaid credit cards. I guess there's a card that if I have it someone can buy vouchers to top up, give me the voucher number, and then I deposit it to my card. I just would prefer to have the $3,500 in my bank account.
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Re: don't what to make of this man? potential client
August is a ways away. Does he literally have no time between now and this trip to see you in person? Even just for lunch or coffee? You could get the deposit as cash in hand that way too.
Given the fact that he works in banking, I would be super leery about giving him banking information, though I honestly can't think of what he could do with just your account number.
The things that make you nervous about him are huge red flags, and it sounds like he's been very persistent in trying to get you to go away with him despite never having seen/met you. It's just very fishy, and if something is too good to be true, it often is. I would insist upon meeting, even if only briefly, before getting a deposit or agreeing to this. He must have half an hour of free time to devote to seeing you if he so desperately wants to whisk you away to a foreign country for 2 weeks.
Any chance you could get a reference from him (ie. that girl)? I mean, theoretically he could just get anyone to say anything, but it's still some more to go off of.
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Re: don't what to make of this man? potential client
Quote:
Originally Posted by
shanna dior
You could get the deposit as cash in hand that way too.
That's a good idea, actually. Even if we are to meet in person and he seems fine, I want the money up front. The last thing I want is to go on a vacay and get some line about how 'the banking systems are down.'
I'm leaning towards no on him but figured as long as there is a safe way for me to get the deposit from him there's no harm in giving him a chance to prove himself legit.
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Re: don't what to make of this man? potential client
Shanna beat me to the suggestions of an in-person meeting to collect the deposit, esp since the proposed trip is still sm time into the future, & getting the name of the girl he claimed to travel w/ previously. I know nothing abt escort screening procedures, admittedly, but have you not tried to screen this guy as you would any other client?
The better one knows an industry, the easier it is for them to wreak havoc w/in it. If he is a banker, then def DO NOT give up any of your banking info, not if all you have to go on is what you told us here. Just like in the SC, the best hustlers will anticipate a mark's objections & have a smooth answer ready to disarm, even if it was his idea to offer the huge deposit I would still be very cautious in dealing w/ this guy until you have more available to determine his legit-ness.
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Re: don't what to make of this man? potential client
Most of the time when a client wants an overnight or a weekend before he has even met you, he is a time waster.
Would you have to give him your real name for him to make a deposit in your account?
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Re: don't what to make of this man? potential client
^I'm having a difficult time screening him because this is just so out of my comfort zone-- I've never done an overnight before, let alone a weekend in a foreign country (he wants to take me to the south of France). My normal screening process would just be to make sure he wasn't a total psycho by looking at his reviews, verify his address, or make him just through confirmation hoops to make sure he's not gonna be a no-show for an incall. But this is beyond that. And unfortunately he contacted me through an ad I have running on a website that I don't use that much, I love Adultwork because the guys have feedback but he contacted me from Vivastreet which is a more high-end version of Backpage but means he doesn't have an account or reviews or anything for me to look at.
I mean, there is a lot of stuff I would have to ask him if we are to go on the trip together-- I would want the reference, I would need his full name, the name of the company he works for, and his address, and I would google the shit out of him-- but I think the first step is to say I can't commit to the trip unless we meet for coffee and I'm happy to travel to his work so that we can meet nearby and not inconvenience him-- that way he really has NO out. I will say that I don't want to give out my bank details to overcomplicate things so we can meet and he can give me the deposit then. I'll also ask for his full name and can get where he works easily from that conversation to do a little googling before I show up.
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Re: don't what to make of this man? potential client
I hate to say it…but most of the time when it sounds too good to be true it probably is. He sounds like a fantasy booker to me. :(
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Re: don't what to make of this man? potential client
Many old people lives are wrecked by giving there banking info to con artist all the time. There are many ways to give a deposit without needing that info.
He sounds a lot like a guy who used to write to girls on SM all the time & wanted our bank acct numbers so he could send a deposit for a long weekend. Since I don't escort I always said no. But he was contacting 100s of other models with the same bs. A long weekend together, offering big money, just needed real name & bank acct number. He got reported & blocked from the site. I was trying to get him to do a long exclusive show beforehand, trying to get money out of him. LOL He NEVER took me private or exclusive.
Reads like the same guy. He also told me that my bank would protect me so there was no harm in giving him that information. Major red flag to me.
Your bank will tell you never to give out your routing number & acct number to a stranger off the web. Seriously, that is just common sense. http://www.consumer.ftc.gov/articles...tronic-banking
Sam
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Re: don't what to make of this man? potential client
Sometimes it is better to take a ?loss and be safe then to risk a lot for a bit of money. I get a lot of newbies asking me for meetings but at this point I am just not comfortable with that risk regardless of the potential income.
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Re: don't what to make of this man? potential client
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Sam38g
Many old people lives are wrecked by giving there banking info to con artist all the time. There are many ways to give a deposit without needing that info.
He sounds a lot like a guy who used to write to girls on SM all the time & wanted our bank acct numbers so he could send a deposit for a long weekend. Since I don't escort I always said no. But he was contacting 100s of other models with the same bs. A long weekend together, offering big money, just needed real name & bank acct number. He got reported & blocked from the site. I was trying to get him to do a long exclusive show beforehand, trying to get money out of him. LOL He NEVER took me private or exclusive.
Reads like the same guy. He also told me that my bank would protect me so there was no harm in giving him that information. Major red flag to me.
Your bank will tell you never to give out your routing number & acct number to a stranger off the web. Seriously, that is just common sense.
http://www.consumer.ftc.gov/articles...tronic-banking
Sam
I highly doubt he's the same guy since we're on a different continent...
He's also never mentioned anything about me giving him my bank info, he just said he would give me a deposit. I was the one who brought up my bank info, not him.
Anyway, the point of this thread is about him giving me a deposit, not to get a bunch of responses from you guys saying you think he's a fantasy booker.
I get he's sketchy, I really don't need you to tell me that. I'm not fucking stupid.
But if he is gonna give me a half deposit in a safe way, then I'm not gonna turn it down.
If you have something to add about the deposit, please post... otherwise... please don't bother. I don't need a bunch of people telling me you think he's iffy, as you can clearly see from my post, I'm obviously questioning his every move.
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Re: don't what to make of this man? potential client
Maybe you can at least talk to him on Skype to see if he creeps you out. On Skype you can also observe, if possible, the background of his dwelling to see if it fits the international banker profile.
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Re: don't what to make of this man? potential client
Go with your intuition, whatever it is. After deliberating you feel like he's legit, then trust yourself. If you're unsure, maybe require a few shorter appointments before committing to an extended trip away. If he's that serious about seeing you, he'll make the time, and if all is legit, then you'll get those big bookings eventually. One thing this business has taught me about myself is that my initial gut reaction is always right. Good luck.
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Re: don't what to make of this man? potential client
Anyone wanting an overnight with someone the haven't even met or talked to is a big red flag. Not saying it never happens or doesn't work out, but there are horror stories of bad chemistry, both parties being miserable...
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Re: don't what to make of this man? potential client
Um, I mean seriously? I do sensual body work, and have had guys offer that, and I know they are full of shit. No one, I mean no one, without even meeting you, would offer a trip for two weeks without meeting you first. Chemistry, if you'll even get along. .... kinda a big deal, for that kinda money. Be smart here, it's not adding up. Oh, and lose the attitude. We are only trying to help you. I've read a lot of your posts, and it seems you need a lot of hand holding. My pov.
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Re: don't what to make of this man? potential client
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Isla
Um, I mean seriously? I do sensual body work, and have had guys offer that, and I know they are full of shit. No one, I mean no one, without even meeting you, would offer a trip for two weeks without meeting you first. Chemistry, if you'll even get along. .... kinda a big deal, for that kinda money. Be smart here, it's not adding up. Oh, and lose the attitude. We are only trying to help you. I've read a lot of your posts, and it seems you need a lot of hand holding. My pov.
You might take your own advise abt 'losing the attitude.'
OP clarified what she was looking for from this thread. No need to get nasty & basically tell her to stop asking for advise when that is exactly what this site is for.
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Re: don't what to make of this man? potential client
Read what she wrote, she wasn't hearing what she wanted. For the record, I wasn't being nasty. I was giving my view point. If I wanted to be, I would. But all I was doing was giving my opinion. That's allowed here, is it ?
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Re: don't what to make of this man? potential client
Quote:
Originally Posted by
audrey_k
He called me again today and said that he is planning a two week trip for August and would I like to accompany him. I said I was uncomfortable with the time period because we don't know each other, but that if he wanted to do a weekend away that would be fine. He asked me how much it would be and I quoted a high # ($5,000) to which he asked me if that would be all because he would expect my full attention for three days so I increased to $8,000 and said I would need a deposit of $3,500 before the trip began. He said that was fine and that he would just give me the deposit now and in the meantime he wants us to text and instant message to get to know each other before the trip.
^Just from this tidbit, I'd charge a separate fee for the GFE he wants before the trip. $8,000 seems good for a 2 week trip that he pays for every expense, but to add in another (at least) 2 weeks of daily attention and ego stroking....
I think you should treat him as any other, regular, 1 or 2 hour client you have, at least for the screening process. He must be able to take you out for a dinner or something like that. Make a 1 hour appointment, before you even decide on this trip, mandatory. Can you imagine having to be stuck in a foreign country with someone you can't stand? Has horrible habits? Gross BO?
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Re: don't what to make of this man? potential client
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Isla
Um, I mean seriously? I do sensual body work, and have had guys offer that, and I know they are full of shit. No one, I mean no one, without even meeting you, would offer a trip for two weeks without meeting you first. Chemistry, if you'll even get along. .... kinda a big deal, for that kinda money. Be smart here, it's not adding up. Oh, and lose the attitude. We are only trying to help you. I've read a lot of your posts, and it seems you need a lot of hand holding. My pov.
Quote:
Originally Posted by
audrey_k
I can't tell if I should take him seriously. Is there any danger in me giving him my bank details for a transfer just to see if he actually sends it through? I don't want to pass up what could potentially be a lot of money because working in this industry has made me so jaded, but I also don't want to get my hopes up and be made a fool of.
If you had actually read my post, you would see that I was not asking for anyone's opinion on whether or not this guy is legit, so no I didn't hear what I wanted, because most of the replies aren't responding to what I actually asked! I stated all the red flags I have about this man and why I have turned down a booking from him in the past. My question was about travel deposits, it was not about whether or not he is a 'good' potential client.
And the point of this board is not to spout a bunch of random opinions, it's to give support and advice, honey, so if you don't want to hold my hand, don't hold my fucking hand. No one asked you for your opinion or to post in this thread, I didn't send you any PMs. You decided to make a post in here, so don't then complain. I have made over 2,000 posts on this board (and you've made what, all of 12?) and a HUGE amount of those posts are me responding to other posters giving them my advice/thoughts on what they are asking, and I have received countless PMs from lades asking me questions which I respond to 90% of the time, so I am COMPLETELY entitled to make as many posts as I want asking for help. I'm sorry you find me taking advantage of the purpose of stripperweb to be such an issue! But please, if my 'hand holding' is too much for you, feel free to avoid my posts!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Aurora14
^Just from this tidbit, I'd charge a separate fee for the GFE he wants before the trip. $8,000 seems good for a 2 week trip that he pays for every expense, but to add in another (at least) 2 weeks of daily attention and ego stroking....
I think you should treat him as any other, regular, 1 or 2 hour client you have, at least for the screening process. He must be able to take you out for a dinner or something like that. Make a 1 hour appointment, before you even decide on this trip, mandatory. Can you imagine having to be stuck in a foreign country with someone you can't stand? Has horrible habits? Gross BO?
It's $8,000 for a 3 day weekend trip, but I see your point. How much would you charge for a service like that?
Anyway, I spoke to him again and made it clear that we have to meet in person and he has agreed, so that will give me a chance to scope him out and also to get my deposit. But I'm still on the fence with him for the reasons I mentioned in my OP.
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Re: don't what to make of this man? potential client
Quote:
Originally Posted by
audrey_k
It's $8,000 for a 3 day weekend trip, but I see your point. How much would you charge for a service like that?
Anyway, I spoke to him again and made it clear that we have to meet in person and he has agreed, so that will give me a chance to scope him out and also to get my deposit. But I'm still on the fence with him for the reasons I mentioned in my OP.
I saw where I thought It was 2 weeks. 3 days makes it even better! I only dance, I rarely give my # out to customers. They have to spend at least $1,000 on me in the club to even get my #, and if they don't come in at least every 2 weeks and spend on me, I stop talking/texting. But I know that is very different from your situation. Maybe there are some SBs checking this thread to give you better input on how to price the GFE-type of stuff between appointments/vacations with him.
Good Luck!
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Re: don't what to make of this man? potential client
^He asked me to come for the full two weeks but I turned him down and said all I was comfortable with was a 3 day weekend because we don't know each other well enough.
Yeah, unfortunately I have to give them my number (well my work number no one gets my personal number) before they spend money in my situation! I've had guys ask me to do texting with them before and I've always said OK I'll charge you what I would charge for one hour and that will cover a week of unlimited texts, and then they go "what? that's crazy I didn't want to spend that much." ::)
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Re: don't what to make of this man? potential client
So because I haven't posted that much I can't have an opinion! ? OK, Audrey. I found this board awhile ago, and yes, haven't been a member for long, or posted that much. Usually because I literally don't have the time. I work and go to school full time. But I don't have to justify myself to you. There also hasn't been that posted about bodywork lately. Sheesh. Defensive much?