Did anyone else feel stupid when they started dancing?
I think of myself as an intelligent person. A's and B's through school and university, I've never had trouble finding work or communicating.
Every new job I've ever started, I always get comments on how quickly I pick up on things, how much common sense I have, and how easy I am to get along with... except stripping.
I've only been dancing for a month, and I've already pissed off two dancers by accidentally taking tips from their side of the stage. I wasn't doing it on purpose, and afterwards I apologized and gave the girls the tip, but I felt pretty stupid for not paying more attention.
I don't usually have trouble starting conversations, but I keep getting tongue tied around customers. I'm normally quite sarcastic and witty, but somehow I just clam up, and I can't get any good banter going.
I was expecting stripping to be hard on my body image, but I never thought it would make me feel bad about my intelligence.
Am I the only one?
Re: Did anyone else feel stupid when they started dancing?
Starting dancing is definitely a different beast than starting any other job. You don't get training or a mentor or anything like that to help you along the way -- you're just thrown out on the floor and have to fend for yourself, with maybe only the knowledge of the basic club rules at your disposal. It's sink or swim, and not a lot of women last long in the industry because of it.
However, I don't think those that struggle, especially at first, are stupid. That really doesn't feel like the appropriate term since it's not as if you have below average intelligence because you haven't become a successful stripper by osmosis in a few shifts.
It takes time to get good at this and to learn the unwritten rules. It's hard to be your regular, witty self when you're not comfortable with the environment.
But you'll get there! The longer you dance, the less foreign the club and the customers will feel, and the more comfortable you'll get with your interactions. After a while, the hustle will become second nature and you won't have to give it as much thought, because the club will feel like your domain that customers are coming into, not the other way around. That confidence and feeling like you're in your element is a HUGE factor in being successful as a dancer, and it has nothing to do with stupidity.
Re: Did anyone else feel stupid when they started dancing?
Thank you. That makes me feel a lot better.
Re: Did anyone else feel stupid when they started dancing?
I agree with Shanna 100%. Not only are you not being trained for the job but stripping is a whole different world when you're just starting out. Nobody starts at a strip club with no experience and magically knows the ropes. I'm already an awkward person so when I just start at a new club I feel uncomfortable and I probably don't look like the smoothest person the first couple nights there.
At my last club idk what happened but when I stepped in the club my brain just went out the window and I said the dumbest things I probably wouldn't say outside of there. I'm a good student too, but in that club all my basic math skills were gone. I guess I ended up looking like a ditsy clueless stripper to customers.
But when I first started when I was 18 (4 years ago) I was constantly doing things that would piss off the other dancers (I also accidentally took other dancers' money and made them think I was stealing). My whole experience at that first club was a mess and a LOT of trial & error, but luckily it was a tiny dive that barely anyone went to so I'm not that embarrassed by it.
My most awkward image of myself is at my last club where there were fully nude couch dances and my very first customer of the night asked me to turn around and dance on him.. I for some reason didn't understand what he wanted and had one leg on the floor and one on the couch competely naked.. in some weird doggy style peeing position. I just remember him being done with the dance early LOL not my best moment.
One more stupid experience I had at another new club where they had bikini dances in booths and one of my first dances for some reason I just couldn't tell the customer no. I don't know why because if this were at my new club I've been at for a while I would have ZERO problems telling the guy hell no. But this guy wanted to pull his shorts down so he was just in boxers and I knew that wasn't okay but literally couldn't say no. The bouncer was watching from the cameras and told me they don't allow that there and I could get fired for that. Clearly he thought I was trying to do some extras in their club (which I wasn't) and I almost had an emotional breakdown (I felt stupid because I couldn't tell him no and I don't take getting yelled at well lol).
OK this was pretty long but you get my point. You're definitely not the only one and I'm sure in another month or two you will get the hang of it and your normal smooth self will come out. If you work at one club for a decent amount of time those little dumb mistakes will stop happening, but it's just part of being new to this job.
Re: Did anyone else feel stupid when they started dancing?
Yep, and it's a constant learning curve. I just started a new club and boy..do I feel stupid, unattractive, blah blah, but I am just trying to ignore it and roll with the punches BC I know it's just my poor spoiled and now bruised ego trying to recover itself! It's also a consequence of having once been complacent at my home club.
On nights I feel especially awkward or stupid, I like to drink and/or put on a goofy or ditzy blonde valley girl act and it actually helps a lot bc the guys aren't as intimidated!
Keep hustlin!