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where does the hustle line get drawn?
How far is too far to string along a regular? Here's a scenario. Say there's a guy in town from another city who is very wealthy and has spent lots on you so far, and he's in town for another month. He has spent time and money on you in the club in hopes that you will marry him.
So far I've only seen him a few times but he's loyal and likes me A LOT. I could hustle so much money out of him and I feel it's my job as a stripper/major hustler to do so, but I also feel shitty because I don't see this ending happily for him, he will get no sex or sexual favors, and I am hustling him.
Is there a line to be drawn? Am I being a hustler or just a bad person. He's actually a pretty decent guy. I feel bad.
Idk if this should be moved to Ladies Only because there have been wandering eyes, but I don't know.
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Re: where does the hustle line get drawn?
I had a very similar situation come to a head (sry bad pun!!) this week. Custie was sweet, spent well, decent guy and respected my rules etc. Until he started comparing me allll the time to his fiancee who had passed away two years ago. And asking me how I'd decorate "our" house. I never led him to believe I would be his girlfriend or lover or anything but stripper friend, no otc. He never even knew my real name as i gave him my "fake real" name. A few days ago he started harassing some of my friends at work, asking them where I was and when I'd be in- no big deal. But then he told my closest friend that he had found my fb page - my real one- by using his fiancées old page!! Wtf!? He told her he was going to track me down, had to see me, blah blah creepfest. Imho (and I normally don't try to cultivate regs for this reason) it's better to set the boundaries and remember that the custie is a paycheck not a friend and you just never know what their real motives are. Sounds harsh, but you gotta protect yourself first. Best of luck, and if he really is a nice guy he won't have an issue with you being upfront.
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Re: where does the hustle line get drawn?
Depends. Are his mental faculties in tact? Is he old and senile then yes you're crossing fine line. If he is senile, then me personally I would dial back the hustle because you know in reality you're not marrying him and you're leading him on toying with his emotions.
Honestly if a dude led you on and pretended like he was going to marry you but just hustling you and using you for p*ssy then how would you feel?
I think if you have to ask the question then deep down in your gut you know the answer.
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Re: where does the hustle line get drawn?
I don't think there needs to be a line, you are just doing your job. If he is that smitten and you are anticipating that the OTC requests are looming then he will probably stop spending as soon as you decline them. So, hustle him as much as you like until that day comes IMO.
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Re: where does the hustle line get drawn?
He's not old and senile, he's in his early 40s. Mentally he is fine other than being desperate for love.
He wants to take me out to dinner. I told him if he does he must still always come see me at the club, he said he will. I have only gone out to dinner with two other customers. I usually don't do dinners. But this guy has a lot of money, if he isn't a millionaire he's certainly close. I think I could potentially make a lot off him (will not put out) but I don't want to hurt him badly / be a total stripper bitch.
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Re: where does the hustle line get drawn?
The thing is, I am playing my hand to currently maximize my earnings. I didn't tell him he will never be more than an appreciated customer, I am leading him to believe that he has a chance to get his dream of a wife and kids.
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Re: where does the hustle line get drawn?
We have had our disagreements Nina_ but I will be straight w/ you here.
I see both sides of the dilemma you're looking at. 'Maximising earnings' Idk what your current goals are (& not digging, don't get me wrong, bc they are beside the point) but earnings are important. For better or worse, $$$$ makes the world go round.
But to be leading a customer on ... the fact that you're asking yourself this question shows that you know it's a dishonest M.O. & that dishonesty isn't sitting right w/ you. As stated upthread, consider how you would feel if you were in his position -- being led on, taken advantage of. It sucks filthy, leperous monkey balls to be That Guy. I was getting a very similar promise dangled in front of me in my last relationship, 'husband + home' only to be told the better part of a yr later that it was all lies. He was just abt food, sex & shared rent rather than $$$$$$ but the motives are, again, beside the point. It's a disgusting feeling.
In the end, YOU are the one who is going to have to live w/ the results of however this plays out. I can't decide for you where to draw the line, nor can any of the other ladies here. IMO, it's time to start thinking less in terms of 'maximising earnings' & more in terms of 'minimising fallout' for both you & this customer. Many, many more earnings will come if you are even half the hustler you make yourself out to be. Toying w/ another person's emotions, tho ... I fully believe that, regardless of one's motives or their line of work, doing so crosses the line from 'doing whatcha gotta do' to outright cruelty, & the aftermath can be devastating.
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Re: where does the hustle line get drawn?
I gave him my number for the sole purpose of us communicating via text whether or not I'm working / he is coming in / etc. But now he wants to text and call all the time and I don't have time for that.
He really wants to take me out to dinner but I'm going to stall as long as possible. I want to keep him in the club. I'm also going to tell him I am not ready for a relationship. I am going to still have to somewhat string him along to get money. Hey, if I don't do it, someone else will. He's a customer and my job is to separate him from his pockets... I guess.
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Re: where does the hustle line get drawn?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Nina_
I am going to still have to somewhat string him along to get money. Hey, if I don't do it, someone else will.
^This! They definitely will ;).
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Re: where does the hustle line get drawn?
I have a guy I'm hustling right now who flat out told me about all his stripper crushes around the country and how he's spent stupid amounts of money on them. I told him I only date "long term serious customers." he's moving again in a few months for his job so I'm just stretching this out until he gives up or moves. Like others said, if I didn't string him along, someone else would. He approached me for VIP and is trying to convince ME that if he spends enough I'll want to date him. He had the stripper addiction way before he met me. Actually I think every regular I've ever had has been a strip club addict. Don't think they're that naive.
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Re: where does the hustle line get drawn?
No, your not wrong, Id do the same thing, let him believe what he wants to get that $$, guys love the chase, your doing him a favor as I see it.
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Re: where does the hustle line get drawn?
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Originally Posted by
Aniela
Toying w/ another person's emotions, tho ... I fully believe that, regardless of one's motives or their line of work, doing so crosses the line from 'doing whatcha gotta do' to outright cruelty, & the aftermath can be devastating.
This summed up what I wanted to say. I'd hate to see you on the evenings news if this man ends up losing his damn mind and goes after you when he finds out that you've been feeding him lies. You know that saying hell hath no fury? It applies to men, too.
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Re: where does the hustle line get drawn?
Now, I'm not saying to NOT get your hustle on..but again, fine line. Like someone else said, how would you feel if a guy fed you all types of stories about marrying you but was just hustling you for pussy? It ain't no fun when the rabbit's got the gun, so just be smart about it.
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Re: where does the hustle line get drawn?
^^True but Im sure she watches her back, we all know we play a dangerous game just stripping and how does she know he's not just hustling her for her pussy? I mean he may not have any game and thinks this is the way, I mean once he finds out she's clearly lying then Id absolutely no otc time for this reason cuz u never know.
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Re: where does the hustle line get drawn?
True, he might just be playing along hoping that she'll throw some pussy his way, he might not REALLY think that, or want her to, run off with him into the sunset.......he might be playing into the fantasy just like she is, no harm no foul. But. When feelings get hurt, people can get hurt too and that's what we DON'T want here. Like Aniela said earlier, it would suck to be that dude so you just gotta minimize the fallout.
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Re: where does the hustle line get drawn?
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Originally Posted by
ava$
^^True but Im sure she watches her back, we all know we play a dangerous game just stripping and how does she know he's not just hustling her for her pussy?
I was thinking the same. Sure he's spending thousands on me so far but compared to his income, that could easily be "pocket change" to him and for all I know he could be giving me this money in hopes of sex...
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Re: where does the hustle line get drawn?
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Originally Posted by
Nina_
I was thinking the same. Sure he's spending thousands on me so far but compared to his income, that could easily be "pocket change" to him and for all I know he could be giving me this money in hopes of sex...
That's exactly what they're doing..if they even *mention* otc or "wanting to date" or "take you to dinner." They are hoping their investment will eventually pay off with sex. That's why I don't feel bad about hustling them. My regulars who come to the club, spend time with me, and leave it at the club get much more of my respect and genuine friendship (but let's face it they're very rare.)
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Re: where does the hustle line get drawn?
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Originally Posted by
wednesday86
I have a guy I'm hustling right now who flat out told me about all his stripper crushes around the country and how he's spent stupid amounts of money on them. I told him I only date "long term serious customers." he's moving again in a few months for his job so I'm just stretching this out until he gives up or moves. Like others said, if I didn't string him along, someone else would. He approached me for VIP and is trying to convince ME that if he spends enough I'll want to date him. He had the stripper addiction way before he met me. Actually I think every regular I've ever had has been a strip club addict. Don't think they're that naive.
I think that's the perfect answer. If you don't do it, someone else will. So you might as well. As long as he is willingly giving you his money without you drugging him (I am NOT recommending that, just saying that he is technically in his right mind while giving you money) then it's his own fault for being stupid. He has a choice to say no.
I always feel a little bad for the ones who are actually nice guys, but in the end you have to look out for yourself.
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Re: where does the hustle line get drawn?
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Originally Posted by
absolutelyadorable
True, he might just be playing along hoping that she'll throw some pussy his way, he might not REALLY think that, or want her to, run off with him into the sunset.......he might be playing into the fantasy just like she is, no harm no foul. But. When feelings get hurt, people can get hurt too and that's what we DON'T want here. Like Aniela said earlier, it would suck to be that dude so you just gotta minimize the fallout.
Thnx for this ^^^^ :)
Also just wanted to clarify, that while I do see Wednesday's point & mostly agree w/ it, in my previous post here I was referring not to just the immediate emotional fallout. I was thinking also of the possible craziness that could result from a severe enough disappointment, be it sm kind of 'ass-over-teakettle, in-love illusion, "If I can't have her no one else can either"' or of the 'Bitch, I spent all this $$$$$$$ on you, goddammit I WILL get smtg put of it' variety. Both equally dangerous IMO.
Yes, I tend to see the worst in ppl. Colour me paranoid. So my leaning is a bit less toward 'take him for every grosz you can' … but it's both out of concern for his feelings (rolling the dice & hoping he isn't nuts) & a desire to minimise the potential for harm to you when his emotional/financial investments don't pan out as he hoped.
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Re: where does the hustle line get drawn?
Plus dude knows where you work and where to find you on any given day....no amount of money is worth your life or your safety.
And some dudes have hidden mental illness and turn crazy from what they perceive as deception/rejection/etc.
There will always be other dudes with money in the club willing to spend it on you.
Just be careful. If he ever gets weird, abort the mission.
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Re: where does the hustle line get drawn?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Aniela
Thnx for this ^^^^ :)
Also just wanted to clarify, that while I do see Wednesday's point & mostly agree w/ it, in my previous post here I was referring not to just the immediate emotional fallout. I was thinking also of the possible craziness that could result from a severe enough disappointment, be it sm kind of 'ass-over-teakettle, in-love illusion, "If I can't have her no one else can either"' or of the 'Bitch, I spent all this $$$$$$$ on you, goddammit I WILL get smtg put of it' variety. Both equally dangerous IMO.
Yes, I tend to see the worst in ppl. Colour me paranoid. So my leaning is a bit less toward 'take him for every grosz you can' … but it's both out of concern for his feelings (rolling the dice & hoping he isn't nuts) & a desire to minimise the potential for harm to you when his emotional/financial investments don't pan out as he hoped.
Right. My thing is fuck feelings but he might be the type to snatch you up if he realizes you've been stringing him along and taking his money in the process. THere's a big difference between a "yeah, I'll go out to dinner with you sometime" and "one day I'll marry you and have your babies" type thing. I'm not sure if you're just telling him you'll see him OTC or actually telling him he has a chance at a relationship with you, but again, be careful. Pride is a motherfucker and when someone is scorned to that extent things can get ugly.
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Re: where does the hustle line get drawn?
I haven't told him I'd marry him or anything, he's just expressed adamantly that that's the point he's at in his life. I didn't shoot down the idea to him so I feel bad.
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Re: where does the hustle line get drawn?
Gotcha. Well if he's assuming on his own that you're gonna ride off into the sunset with him, that's on him. You know what they say about assumptions. BUT.....if you're giving him the vibe that you're both on the same page.....no. Can't stress enough to play your cards right and don't get your hands dirty. Again, I would really hate to see you on the news.
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Re: where does the hustle line get drawn?
Actually, I would say that you should hustle him until there is nothing left. However, you should watch out for his faux romantic bullshit because he could turn on you if you reject him. Nina, just stay safe during your hustle :)
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Re: where does the hustle line get drawn?