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Femdom: How to dominate a submissive man, via webcam
Would anyone like to give tips/ suggestions, on how to perform on cam as a femdom? For the submissive customers. This is just for fun conversation, I'm sure I'll figure more stuff out as I go, even if there are no suggestions here. I like to dominate.
I also wonder, can I call myself a dominatrix? I just really like the word, dominatrix... But it sounds like the kind of thing you can only call yourself, if you're really, really experienced. And a known professional in the real world, rather than on cam. Not that it really matters much whether other people approve of what word you use, but it's a question anyway. I'm just mildly experienced from my personal life. I try to read up on the term sometimes. Some sources suggest that I could call myself a dominatrix, others don't.
It doesn't sound the same to call oneself a Femdom, though I guess I could use the word 'Domme.' I think men who are dominant have it easier, they can just call themselves a "Dom" and they don't have to worry about whether they qualify for that term or not.
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Re: Femdom: How to dominate a submissive man, via webcam
I think Femdom is the act of it, Domme/dominatrix is the noun for people who do it. You don't need a special outfit or anything to be a good dominatrix. Just be self-confident, find your specialities like joi, sph, cuckolding, practice, and get good at them. But yes you can call yourself that.
I don't call myself a dominatrix but I'm a switch so yeah :'3
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Re: Femdom: How to dominate a submissive man, via webcam
You can call yourself a dominatrix if you want, I don't see why not. It's all virtual anyway - it's not as if anyone needs to check up on what you've done IRL. On the internet, you can be whatever you want!
I went from doing normal vanilla camming to strictly dom/fetish stuff and I definitely prefer it. I guess the main thing is to get into the right mindset while you're at it... not being afraid of being too mean/demanding, since that's exactly what they look for. It's a huge rush to just assume for once that you have the right to do or say whatever you want and to order people around to your heart's content.
Domming can be kind of tricky since a lot of guys can be quite shy or unable to express exactly what they're asking for, so it's definitely possible to get the mood wrong. That said, you'll mostly get requests for the same couple of fetishes (rarely anything particularly new) so, like anything, the more you do it, the easier it gets.
I think I read a post on here regarding dirty talk to the effect of "something that sounds completely corny and over the top to you probably sounds just right to them", which is so true, haha.
You might wanna invest in a nice-looking, not-too-expensive strapon too if you don't already have one. It'll pay for itself.
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Re: Femdom: How to dominate a submissive man, via webcam
I LOVE to be dominate. There isn't a submissive bone in my body.
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Re: Femdom: How to dominate a submissive man, via webcam
Love the poll! "I like to dominate" needs to be a bumper sticker. I'm very much an alpha female personality.
If you're dominant by nature, just be yourself. Read some femdom erotica on literotica if you need inspiration. There is a ton of it out there and it will help to expand your knowledge base, learn the common fetishes that go along with it, and help with on cam phrasing. Don't be scared to be demanding or to give the impression that you're on an unattainable pedestal.
As far as what you should call yourself, it depends on what services you're planning on providing. Personally, I think of a FemDom or Domme as a dominant woman, whereas a dominatrix is a bit more professional. Really, you should do whatever you're comfortable with.
oh and I agree completely with sovereignv: grab a strap on and a couple of large dildos. Make sure you grab at least one monster black one... it'll pay for itself in a day. If you have a little money to toss around and plan on making clips, get a chastity cage as well.
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Re: Femdom: How to dominate a submissive man, via webcam
This is a fun topic! I'm a switch I guess. My main femdom shows are humiliation, joi, sph, foot domination, have yet to do cei,orgasm refusal, diapers, etc.
I also do submissive shows. Most of the time it is established it is a submissive show beforehand, sometimes I can catch on thats what they want. In which they can call me names, or I call them daddy, sir, etc I have no real preference for one or the other. I just put myself in the mindset that it is all fantasy or even roleplay.
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Re: Femdom: How to dominate a submissive man, via webcam
Quote:
Originally Posted by
audritwo
I LOVE to be dominate. There isn't a submissive bone in my body.
"Ditto, little sister!
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Re: Femdom: How to dominate a submissive man, via webcam
While we're in the thread - sorry if this is off topic - how do those of you who dom feel about teamviewer? I get a LOT of requests for it but I've always felt it was too much of a hassle/too risky to deal with.
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Re: Femdom: How to dominate a submissive man, via webcam
I love dom play. My favorite is actually cuck, and I make SURE they want what they're asking for before we go in. Too many guys think cuck is hotwifeing, fuck that noise.
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Re: Femdom: How to dominate a submissive man, via webcam
Quote:
Originally Posted by
sovereignv
While we're in the thread - sorry if this is off topic - how do those of you who dom feel about teamviewer? I get a LOT of requests for it but I've always felt it was too much of a hassle/too risky to deal with.
I don't do it. Way too much of a security risk on my end for my comfort.
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Re: Femdom: How to dominate a submissive man, via webcam
Quote:
Originally Posted by
sovereignv
While we're in the thread - sorry if this is off topic - how do those of you who dom feel about teamviewer? I get a LOT of requests for it but I've always felt it was too much of a hassle/too risky to deal with.
Do you mean using the team viewer to remote access their desktop to withdraw money?
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Re: Femdom: How to dominate a submissive man, via webcam
Quote:
Originally Posted by
miss.a.p1600
Do you mean using the team viewer to remote access their desktop to withdraw money?
Some just want you to wreck their social media accounts. I get a lot of requests for that.
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Re: Femdom: How to dominate a submissive man, via webcam
As a switch: you can't really "domme" your way into confidence. You need to focus on the days when you have the meanness and desire to subjugate brewing inside you. After a while you find your groove and find it easier, but those first days need to be as naturally domme as you can get. In D/s relationships they say never domme angry, but when it comes to custies, anger seems better.
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Re: Femdom: How to dominate a submissive man, via webcam
do what empowers you and turns YOU on. That is most alluring. Feel free to read my topic about FinScammers before engaging in TeamViewer and high fraud activity. It has the potential for scammers to get your time and attention and leave you in the dust. I prefer doing it by the minute or for a nice hefty gift card. I have a sub boy in another country that has put thousands into gift cards for me and I now have professional lighting DSLR camera and always about $500 in fun money. I don't rely on him for bills but I love fun money and I never even have to get naked. Plus I get to be the living nightmare I naturally am while being rewarded for it. Pretty good deal.
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Re: Femdom: How to dominate a submissive man, via webcam
Quote:
Originally Posted by
xCamLovex
do what empowers you and turns YOU on. That is most alluring. Feel free to read my topic about FinScammers before engaging in TeamViewer and high fraud activity. It has the potential for scammers to get your time and attention and leave you in the dust. I prefer doing it by the minute or for a nice hefty gift card. I have a sub boy in another country that has put thousands into gift cards for me and I now have professional lighting DSLR camera and always about $500 in fun money. I don't rely on him for bills but I love fun money and I never even have to get naked. Plus I get to be the living nightmare I naturally am while being rewarded for it. Pretty good deal.
That sounds super awesome, go you! And I lol'd at "living nightmare". I really wish I had the confidence, or at the very least knew the proper things to say to keep "the carrot" ahead of them to stick around. I get tons of submissive men coming to me, but, once I start roleplaying with them (often via paid chat), I will run out of things to say. I need to embrace my dominant / "fuck you" side more I think haha.
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Re: Femdom: How to dominate a submissive man, via webcam
^^^ If you're running out of things to say, you need to read more porn!! There are tons of guys discussing their kinks on forums, blogs, etc. Look up some femdom tumblrs too! Literotica is another good free source for scripts, keywords, etc.
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From vanilla to domination/fetishes
Hi everyone!
I never opened a thread and I hope I`m not opening one that was discussed already .I have a few questions for ya`ll because I`m kind of lost here and also worried that I`m overthinking.
I`m camming on and off for a few years,just for the past 2 years full time.
I`m a vanilla cam model.And I enjoy it but I want to diversify.I don`t know for sure (yet) if I want to get into domme stuff but I`m thinking about it(I`m not sexually dominant irl nor submissive ,and I always thought I should be that way so I can provide such services on cam but I might be wrong).
So for those of you who switched from vanilla to domme,how hard was it ?Did you adapt right away to your new niche/role?Especially those who are not dommes irl.(I fear that I will look pathetic trying to be something that I`m not although I`m always in control irl ,just not sexually.)
How did you make the change?It will be a new persona,so did you get a new profile on your cam sites or kept old profiles?
What to do when usual guys/regs will come for vanilla shows?Turn them off ? Offer both domme and vanilla at the same time ?(I`m thinking it won`t make me look good to offer both .)
As a domme,you are supposed to offer EVERY fetish out there ?
Let`s say I`m allergic to latex and I won`t have any,will that be bad for business?(In my mind all dommes are goth looking in latex and pvc and the ones in regular clothes are amateurs so bare with me lol)
Background and outfits.Special setup/decoration or a normal room?I guess my pink room should turn in something darker?Regarding decorations I sure don`t want cuffs and strapons hanging on my walls like I`ve seen in some rooms so is it ok to keep it simple?How many outfits have you had when you started as a domme and were they all latex/pvc?
I have to say that I`m not much into fetishes but I`m doing my research now and trying to learn as much as I can,I spend hours at night researching and learning,some seem easier than others ,it will take a while so maybe by the mid of this year I`ll be prepared.
Another thing I`m not confident about is that I am not native english and I fear I`ll get stuck or shy when trying to dominate or role play ,will just typing do it for me till I get more confident ?I have the feeling that slaves/fetish guys are really picky,are they ?
I know it`s different for everyone and what`s good for you might not be good for me and that I won`t know unless I try,but I could use some advice before I start changing my room /invest in outfits ,so thank you in advance to everyone who will take the time to read and answer:)
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Re: From vanilla to domination/fetishes
I started out doing vanilla and submission shows for a very brief time before switching purely to domination (which was a gradual process). It's like they say, your niche finds you. If you're comfortable doing vanilla shows there's no reason for you not to do both vanilla and fetish at the same time. Some clients will be looking for a more traditional "domme" experience but if that doesn't feel natural to you, you really don't need to provide it - a lot of people don't really mind and you'll most likely be making more money if you can do both. I kept my old profiles, I just edited them a bit.
You don't need to offer every fetish! Definitely not. It's like with vanilla, you don't NEED to offer triple fisting or blowjobs or whatever. Offer what you're comfortable with and happy with. I never wear latex on cam but I do wear PVC sometimes and it's very popular. Honestly, it's funny, but when I wear PVC people compliment me on my "latex" or "leather" clothing. You'd think since they're so into it they'd be able to tell the difference. Heels are good though. Please don't think that you need to commit to some crazy "traditional domme" black and red latex and whip aesthetic. Submissive men are into all sorts of women too, if they want you they'll find you.
You can and definitely should do your research but the only way to really learn is by doing. If you can find a way to get enjoyment out of it (I don't get any sexual stimulation, but I find it amusing and enjoyable for that reason) you'll do much better.
The one thing about camming is that people to a large extent believe they are seeing what they want to be seeing - i.e. if they want to see you as a superior cruel goddess, they will, whether YOU believe it or not. Just act confident and you'll be fine.
Hope that helps.
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Re: From vanilla to domination/fetishes
Quote:
Originally Posted by
sovereignv
I started out doing vanilla and submission shows for a very brief time before switching purely to domination (which was a gradual process). It's like they say, your niche finds you. If you're comfortable doing vanilla shows there's no reason for you not to do both vanilla and fetish at the same time. Some clients will be looking for a more traditional "domme" experience but if that doesn't feel natural to you, you really don't need to provide it - a lot of people don't really mind and you'll most likely be making more money if you can do both. I kept my old profiles, I just edited them a bit.
You don't need to offer every fetish! Definitely not. It's like with vanilla, you don't NEED to offer triple fisting or blowjobs or whatever. Offer what you're comfortable with and happy with. I never wear latex on cam but I do wear PVC sometimes and it's very popular. Honestly, it's funny, but when I wear PVC people compliment me on my "latex" or "leather" clothing. You'd think since they're so into it they'd be able to tell the difference. Heels are good though. Please don't think that you need to commit to some crazy "traditional domme" black and red latex and whip aesthetic. Submissive men are into all sorts of women too, if they want you they'll find you.
You can and definitely should do your research but the only way to really learn is by doing. If you can find a way to get enjoyment out of it (I don't get any sexual stimulation, but I find it amusing and enjoyable for that reason) you'll do much better.
The one thing about camming is that people to a large extent believe they are seeing what they want to be seeing - i.e. if they want to see you as a superior cruel goddess, they will, whether YOU believe it or not. Just act confident and you'll be fine.
Hope that helps.
Thank you for your reply.That makes sense.You can tell this is new for me haha.
I think I am a bit burnt out and there are days when I don`t really enjoy vanilla,I mean when they ask me if I do this and that I just want to punch them thru my screen.I`m enjoying my regulars though but that is because they are good and patient guys.Another reason I think about domination/fetishes is because I had my time as a vanilla girl on one of my sites ,so I feel like I should bring something new and lately I got only fetish guys on there ,I can`t remember when I last took my toys out for that site.I turned off most of them because I didn`t know enough about their fetishes but with a bit of research I`m slowly getting at it.
By doing is the best way to learn indeed,when I had my first cuckold I had no idea what I`m doing,still he comes back to me every week now,I must be doing something right .
I guess I have to change my mind set a bit and work on my confidence.After all,confidence is the key in vanilla too.
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Re: From vanilla to domination/fetishes
It really is. I know there's a lot of women here (who make way more than I do as well) who do both vanilla stuff and domination so hopefully they'll chip in.
There really isn't one way to do it - I provide more of a traditional "mistress" approach without nudity etc but I certainly don't sit there scowling in thigh high boots and latex. You have to find a way to do it that's comfortable for you. Bratty princess, Goddess, glamour bitch, intelligent mindfuck domme, there's so many archetypes. If you can pull off cuckolding then you're probably on the right path.
As much as I bitch about my work I do enjoy it a lot, especially humiliation. Once you hit that "switch" where you realize you CAN actually be as mean as you want it's so cathartic. How often do you get to do that in real life? Rarely. Plus, for me, I'm naturally a bit sadistic so I enjoy that type of thing as well. Some people are more about being worshipped and feeling superior and making people crawl for them, that's another approach. They're not mutually exclusive of course. I guess your clientele finds you based on what kind of vibe you give off. I'm a lowkey goth looking redhead and I get a lot of sissy/strapon/CEI/humiliation/"forced bi" type clients, not so much worship clients, which is fine by me. Domming for me is mainly about talking, which I love - I do very little "showing off my body" type stuff, even clothed, and most of the stuff I do is just showing my feet. Wish I got to do CBT and weird roleplays more often tho :O
Actually if you're happy doing nudity etc that's really good for you - that means you can monetize the pussy worship/facesitting/tit worship/ass worship clientele. Personally I'm not comfortable doing that anymore so I leave it out but there's definitely a market for it!!!
Good luck. I love domming, haha, and I love to talk about it. As you can tell.
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Re: From vanilla to domination/fetishes
"Domming for me is mainly about talking, which I love"- I envy you right now,wish I was confident in my abilities and talk some more ,I often get stuck.Last evening I was in pvt with my cuckold reg and damn ,I was amazed at the way I was talking,I made him cum quite fast just by talking but it depends so much on my mood,I wish it just came to me naturally ,all the time:)
I find humiliation to be really hard on cam , I get stuck,like...wtf does he want me to say?lol .Reason why I`m trying to do as much research as possible so I can actually understand these guys before getting into it.
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Re: From vanilla to domination/fetishes
I used to find humiliation SO difficult too, I never talked on cam if I could avoid it, now it's one of my favourite things. Usually your client will egg you on a bit and hint at what he wants. Honestly a decent source to give you an idea of the "triggers" for each fetish is to seek out porn made by people who are into it... not videos necessarily (don't know why but I find actually watching another woman doing this feels awkward) but for instance, I've bumped into several tumblrs entirely dedicated to making fun of tiny dicks. I had no idea what sissification was really about before I found tumblrs about it.
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Re: From vanilla to domination/fetishes
Quote:
Originally Posted by
seicento
(In my mind all dommes are goth looking in latex and pvc and the ones in regular clothes are amateurs so bare with me lol)
XD I offer both vanilla & domination, I do both on the same profile, insame clothing- which sometimes is a my little pony sweater (even when I wore that I was swept inside excl for a dom show). My longest sessions are mostly the domination/femdom shows
I dont think you have to change your room or clothing, at least from my exp they dont care what you are wearing (leaving aside guys with a shoe/stocking/clothing etc fetish), its more about attitude and bodylanguage which are most important (and offcourse interaction). I find it very easy to switch into dom and go back into vanilla but that is prob bec I always remain that feeling that I am always in controll also in vanilla shows, offcourse I play it out more in femdom shows and in my regular shows I make it revolve around their wishes.
You learn by doing. The start is always most difficult and scariest. Just try things out when you get requests and see what fits you most. Funny thing is what I get asked most is also what really fits me most
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Re: From vanilla to domination/fetishes
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ks-_Mh1QhMc
Btw I saw this in the hustle sectgion. Maybe it's also helpfull for femdom shows.
I realised while watching it that those power poses are the ones I choose naturally in free chat. Prob also becI have been a fetish model for years- so I learned allready a lot about the power of bodylanguage and how to come off strong
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Re: From vanilla to domination/fetishes
I am not native English neither, I havent done it yet but you can also mindfuck them by suddenly talking in your own language? Haha might be funny to try out. I know my language (Dutch) comes off very strong. (in the meanwhile you can pick up your text again while speaking jebberish)
You can always weasle a way out of it.. f.e when you get blank while inside a sph show...*silence* just thinking about that pathetic little extra belly button of yours make me so uncomfortable/disgusted etc and by the way sad for you that I dont even know what I was saying anymore. Make up for it by offering your excuses for having such a worthless tiny shrimpthingy
and on you go again
always turn it around to them when you go blank- they did something wrong/they were so disgusting/they where so pathetic that they threw you off and they have to beg for forgiveness