Lost my first regular?? How to win back
So I've been dancing just over a year now. I'm great at pulling new or out of town custies into VIP - I am consistently a top earner wherever I go in my city. However I get bored of clubs easily and bounce around far too often to maintain regulars ( I admire those of you with the patience to do so lol)
Well I started at a new club I've consistently danced at for a few weeks (not long I know)...one dude came in and got dances from me several times in a row. Well last night, he took someone else to champagne room (he's only done a 3 for 100 with me) and tonight, despite calling me over upon arrival (but of course he "needed to settle in" before dancing) but then later took the same girl back again!!
To be fair, I didn't talk to him much after our first talk because I got busy. However I find it annoying he went out of his way to call me over and bought nothing. I am usually in VIP every night and I really don't think it's anything I did wrong sales-wise aside from getting too busy to approach him again sooner (I could be wrong though, who knows.) Hotness-wise, we are both cute, I'm blonde with big boobs and she's brunette with big butt so maybe he likes that look better?
This guy is at the club almost daily and will for sure see me again soon. Should I:
A) ignore him/ be extra cold to him? (He will deff know why...he knew I saw him take her back)
B) guilt trip him into buying
C) continue being friendly and ignore the whole thing (honestly even if this is the best choice I'm really annoyed and don't think I'm the type to pull off the "everything is fine" look too well...but i potentially would if he seems like he'll spend)
I realize he can do whatever he wants but next time he pulls me over how should I react? If he's not spending money he doesn't deserve my time but I'm not sure the best way to make this clear...also since I've seen him do a CR with other girls, how can I make him feel like now should do one with me/owes me one?
Re: Lost my first regular?? How to win back
Just do C. Ignoring him won't do anything for your money, and guilt tripping is more drama than it's worth -- besides, a regular doesn't owe you anything just because he went for dances with someone else. It's also not unusual for customers to be into more than one dancer at a time -- they come to the club for an escape and like having variety, so they're not into being guilt tripped. Now, there are some customers who are into the drama and love to play dancers off each other because it makes them feel like hot shit, so it's possible that he's one of them, but it can be hard to say. Personally, I'm not into dealing with that so I just go C on everyone.
Next time you see him, if you're not busy, greet him as you normally would and just ask if he wants some company or if he's waiting for someone else. Then you know right off the bat if you should waste your time or not. If he wants you, great; if not, tell him to enjoy his night and tell him you can't wait to see him again, and then move on to someone else.
Re: Lost my first regular?? How to win back
next time he pulls you over, close the sale quickly without letting him take up too much of your time..tell him you can talk in the CR. dont act cold or jeaous, he's a customer not a bf..i wouldn't even call him your regular at this point. he can go in with whoever he wants, and dont assume she's somehow prettier or better at sales, for all you know she offers more than you in there. dont let this get you mad
Re: Lost my first regular?? How to win back
Quote:
Originally Posted by
simone87
next time he pulls you over, close the sale quickly without letting him take up too much of your time..tell him you can talk in the CR. dont act cold or jeaous, he's a customer not a bf..i wouldn't even call him your regular at this point. he can go in with whoever he wants, and dont assume she's somehow prettier or better at sales, for all you know she offers more than you in there. dont let this get you mad
Agreed. It's fine if he changes his mind or wants to switch it up, but he shouldn't be taking up your time for free. I would smile, chit chat for a couple songs and ask if he's ready to have fun. If he "needs to settle in" excuse yourself and tell him to let you know when he's ready. If he consistently blows you off after a couple weeks I would stop approaching him altogether.
Also to answer your last question, if a guy said or hints that he'll do a room/dance with me and he goes back with another girl, I'll approach him after he's done and tell him I'm jealous and ask when it's my turn (not in a serious/bitchy way, but in a funny/flirty way.) This worked for me sometimes. Hope it helps?
Re: Lost my first regular?? How to win back
Getting dances with you a few times doesn't really make someone a regular. I wouldn't even call someone a solid regular until it's been a few months and they seem actually hooked - not just a "ooh shiny new toy" guy, or a guy who thinks he'll convert you to OTC after enough time and money and then gets bored and moves on when he realizes it won't happen. I remember being hassled one night because a guy called me over of his own accord and this one dancer would not leave us alone. When he finally left, she was like "Sorry if it seemed like I was horning in, but that guy's my regular." 1) He was a traveler - he had been in town for 2 whole nights... that's not a regular... and 2) Even if he was, if he's calling over other girls, that's (frankly) your cue to get lost.
Calling you over without any intention to spend is annoying, I agree. But he doesn't owe any one dancer in the club his money. If you end up getting "guilt-trip" money out of him, that won't last long once he grows a pair and decides he doesn't want to be bullied into handing over money to one particular person out of guilt anymore. You're at work - not a nightclub. It's not worth it to spend your time on teaching anyone a lesson or creating drama where they doesn't need to be any. Don't waste time with him if he's not spending, and don't waste your mental energy trying to compare you and the other girl - he wants what he wants, it probably doesn't boil down to one little thing you can change, and you'll just drive yourself crazy.
Just greet him normally, try to close, and if he doesn't bite, focus on other men. If you end up getting money out of him later because he flags you over for a dance - great. If not, you'll be busy with other customers and won't have wasted anymore time than it takes to say hi. Your time and energy is much better spent trying to win over fresh customers rather than trying to drag money out of one guy who clearly doesn't want to, and isn't obligated, to give it. You also have a much higher chance of eventually getting his money again in the future if you just limit your time with him and act normal otherwise.
Re: Lost my first regular?? How to win back
Thanks guys, all great advice. I will definitely focus more on myself and less on her. I'm too competitive lol, helps me sell hard though at least :)
I guess by "guilt-trip" I more meant make him feel bad but possibly in a flirty "when's it my turn" type of way...I guess I was getting annoyed because that's more or less the approach I used last night on him and he still ran off with her again. So I wasn't sure if it was worth even going over to him unless he goes out of his way to come grab me.
After reading these posts I'm realizing the guilt-trip approach could seem like I'm trying to start drama. I'm good at putting customers on the spot/pushing them hard into buying and it usually works but that's an approach I should save for out-of-towners only which I'm realizing
For all I know he's a long time regular of hers so I'll quit worrying. I honestly feel way better after reading all this advice