Re: Mother Keeps Asking.....
You could let her know that being her benefactor is interfering with your schedule which is something important for you to maintain so you're unable to drive her around during the inconvenient hours she asks.
Re: Mother Keeps Asking.....
Maybe try to figure out the real issue with her wanting you to take her instead of a friend or cab. I usually have my brother drop me off because I don't want to pay for parking but if he offered to pay for the parking I'd jump all over that. Maybe deep down she wants you to go with her or she feels like talking happens best in the car.
Re: Mother Keeps Asking.....
I think she see it as some bonding experience or something but if I'm being forced to do something I don't want to do I'm going to be pissed not in the mood to talk or bond.
And of course she's trying to save money. However when I offer to give her money for a cab she rejects and then complains to other people about me behind my back - even to the kid once.
It's like [email protected] quit acting broke (in my mind if you can afford to fly you can afford a cab) and quit inconviencing me for your leisure.
Argh! I guess I'm a grouch.
Re: Mother Keeps Asking.....
Maybe if it's bonding you can instead suggest yall get coffee or whatever instead? I've had to pick up and drop off family at the airport God knows how many times and its a pain lol, esp if the airport is in a major city. If you've offered to pay and she still refuses it must be either the bonding or some other reason right. It's not ok to trash talk you to other ppl that manipulative
Re: Mother Keeps Asking.....
Okay one more question.
I think she gets offended because she has this "after all I've done for you, the least you could do is take me to the airport" attitude.
Do you think since she drove me around when I was a kid that I owe her now in the future? I mean I don't mind paying her back in other ways but not this. Am I being an unreasonable ingrate? Like is this a thing family and friends are supposed to do for each other? I could see doing this for your immediate family like husband and kids but I don't feel obligated to extended family.
You both said you all drive your family to the airport. Do you do this so they can drive you if you need it? Would you be offended if they said no?
Re: Mother Keeps Asking.....
You do not owe for being a parent to you. She's using you. Just tell her no. She's an adult, and can find a way to the airport herself. You know she's using you as a personal chauffeur to the airport and for attention of how ungrateful her selfish daughter.
Re: Mother Keeps Asking.....
No you do not owe her a ride just because she's your mother. There are other things you can do for her, IF you want a relationship with her.
I however do rely on my brother to take me to the airport because of all I do for him on the regular bases. If he told me no I probably would be pissed but that's because I've taken him to work in the middle of the night for months mostly for free.
Re: Mother Keeps Asking.....
No you don't owe her! Parents owe their children, children do not owe their parents. As a child it was her responsibility to drive and care for you, she took on that responsibility when you were born and doesn't get "repaid" or "owed" like you were some random person she took pity on.
If I were to tell my family I couldn't they would totally get it, And so would I.
Re: Mother Keeps Asking.....
You don't owe her, but I bet you're correct it isn't the ride whe wants, it is time with you. IMHO she wants to ask you something or tell you something but she's afraid to.
Also, for parents, you aren't an adult; they'll never see you that way. They see you as an amalgamation of everything from baby in their arms to sassy teen to young adult to now. I know for myself, when I see my friend's kids, suddenly they're tall, crackly voiced teens, I'm like, where the hell did you come from and what happened to the cute kid I used to buy toys for?
People like being in the "warm embrace" of family rather than some dick cab driver :-) if your personality IRL is anything like it is on here then I can see why everyone wants to be around you, especially your mother.
Re: Mother Keeps Asking.....
Well. She waits till the last minute to tell me again about this expected airport taxi driving I'm supposed to do. And I told her I would but I would not be doing it anymore in the future and then made sure to give all the reasons why I did not want to do it anymore.
And of course she's pissed now and probably trash talking me as I type this.....
Re: Mother Keeps Asking.....
Im sorry sweetheart, a mother should never trash talk about her babies.. it's heartbreaking to hear such a thing to me.
Re: Mother Keeps Asking.....
i can feel u but i dont think u owe anything to her. my mom has the same attitude, but in a much higher level. u spported her for years and years when she could work as anything she wanted as, she speaks 6 languages and could find a great job anywhere. but shes lazy and i had to do it all at 27 years of age. cummon, this is bs. they just use us, when they are like this.
Re: Mother Keeps Asking.....
“I would love to drive you to the airport, but I have a prior commitment. I wish you had asked a month ago!”
Re: Mother Keeps Asking.....
^^^^I told her I was having car issues (which is the truth) but I guess she thought I was lying and kept pressing the issue and I finally just told her I didn't want to. Well she replied with some passive aggressive text so I guess I won't be talking to her for a long time.
Re: Mother Keeps Asking.....
I bet I can guess your ethnic background in the tries, lol. I know its a pain in the ass but I think you should just bring her.