Aging gracefully while cute
tl;dr: I'm having an issue with my cam persona, and realllly need some style advice on how to look cute without coming across as mutton dressed as lamb.
I've been making adult content in one form or another for over a decade, starting at the age of 24, and my most loyal, lasting customer relationships have come from content where I was seen as, for lack of a better word, "cute". Not full on kawaii, but a sweet, adorkable, slightly vulnerable girl with a wicked side. When I started camming, I was in my mid-30s. I was trying to tone down the cuteness, because I didn't think my milf-loving demographic would go for it. I was trying to be a grown-up sensual lady, not an adorkable girl. My branding, outfits and photos are along those lines too: corsets, stockings, sophisticated sensuality, that kind of thing.
The problem? My adorkable personality hasn't gone anywhere. Trying to be something I'm not is absolutely exhausting. I can just about keep up the sophisticated vixen act when I'm not doing free chat, but as soon as I'm streaming in free chat for any length of time, sophistication goes out of the window, and the cute dork comes back. The milf lovers aren't into that, but I do get shows, and generally stay on longer and feel better afterwards. I'm about to throw in the towel, admit that I haven't grown any kind of sophistication despite my best efforts, and to bring my branding in line with what my actual behaviour on cam looks like, so that guys who are into cute dorks can find me.
My sense of style is terrible, so I hope you'll help me out. I still feel like a grown-ass lady in her late 30s can't rock up on cam in a Hello Kitty shirt or a gothic lolita dress and expect to get away with it. There're so many ways to get "cuteness" wrong, and end up in mutton-dressed-as-lamb territory.
What does a middle-aged "cute" girl look like? Are there any book or movie characters you can think of who are doing older cuteness right? Are you, in fact, an aging cutie and have it all figured out - how do you do it? Any style advice, favourite looks, cautionary tales?
Re: Aging gracefully while cute
Have you ever watched "The New Girl"? Reading what you wrote I think this may be a good starting place if you're looking for adorkable inspiration.
Jess and CeCe
http://www.nlcafe.hu/data/cikk/19/187923/8.jpg
Re: Aging gracefully while cute
Nope, never seen it! Off to research, thank you :) The girl on the left has similar face shape to mine, maybe I can copy her hair :)
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Also you're not middle aged. Zooey Deschanel is 37. I know it's Hollywood but I don't think you will have a hard time pulling something like this off. And it's pretty easy to transition into glam with the accessories you already have.
http://vignette4.wikia.nocookie.net/...20140422011847
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Holy shit, she's my age. I'm a good deal rounder, but there's still enough in her style I can steal.
PGD, you're an actual genius.
ETA For reference, I was trying to copy Wynona Ryder, but she's enough thinner that it didn't work at all.
Re: Aging gracefully while cute
It helps these days just to be unique. I'm sure that a Kawaii GILF would do really well on any site just simply because she's so niche and unique.
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Re: Aging gracefully while cute
Tina Fey for sure! Adorable, sexy, smart, fucking hilarious, etc. etc. and grown!
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Re: Aging gracefully while cute
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Originally Posted by
livroyale
Tina Fey for sure! Adorable, sexy, smart, fucking hilarious, etc. etc. and grown!
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Hi five to that
http://gifrific.com/wp-content/uploa...-high-five.gif
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jlo is my idol. she's still workin it...
fierce...youthful...unapologetic...milfy...hot!
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@DWS, I'm kind of in the same boat with you in terms of being in my 30s but still having a more fun/playful/cute type of personality and style. I can do the lingerie seductress type, but that's more something I do on demand, not my default setting.
I think the examples above are really perfect. I also think that the idea of what a MILF is has evolved a bit. It used to only be a horny cougar-type in a teddy and kitten heels, along the lines of Stiffler's Mom in American Pie or Samantha in Sex and the City. Now I think we have a lot of images of a more casual type of MILF - more quirky and bubbly. The type that runs around in yoga pants all the time and has some nerdy guilty pleasure like being obsessed with craft beer, GoT, or first person shooter games. I'm thinking characters like Nancy in Weeds, pretty much all of Sarah Jessica Parker's characters, and Lisa Edelstein's character in Girlfriend's Guide to Divorce. Obviously all those ladies are beyond their 30s, but it shows that you can be casual/quirky/bubbly/nerdy/klutzy AND sexy well into your 40s, if not your 50s.
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Oh, also, as far as what to wear... I think if you have matching bra and panties it goes a long ways toward making your outfit feel age appropriate. They don't have to be particularly fancy, but if they appear to be a matched set, it gives a touch of sophistication that can still be pretty casual.
Throw a basic tank top or fitted tee over your matching underthings, and you have something that straddles the cute/grownup line. It can read as "I'm fun and laid-back. I could throw on some jeans and go to the grocery store like this. But you also know I'm a grown woman because I buy my undergarments in sets and do my laundry frequently enough that I don't get stuck with mismatched stuff." (Hint: if you want to pull this off regularly, the laundry part will have to be true.) At the same time, the guys that want to read your look as more sophisticated can interpret it that way, too.
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^^ Yeah This! Im pushing forty and I do matching (expensive) bra and panties sets all the time but when Im feeling cute then I add a sort of grungy tank top or I do sleeves on my arms. I love to wear cotton stockings, the school girl kind but in black or off white I have a ton of those. Also I love those contacts that make your eyes look like dolls I will pop those things in and just stare at the camera and guys dont pick up on the fact that they are contacts they just think Im adorable! When I do this I also do full coverage make up and bake it so I look flawless. It sets the mood and I get guy after guy wanting me to play cute in prvt. or excl.
You gotta just mix it up and make it your own! Dont be afraid to be Honest. The guys who want MILF are usually young guys wanting to be seduced but there are a tons of men your age and older who want you cause they are more comfortable being with an adult rather then the "barely legal" look. So if you dont feel like you can play up the Mrs. Robinson persona then go with cute and submissive and just be straight up with guys.
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I just advertise as much younger. Guys ain't got a clue anyway. I think that your choice of music and the things you talk about age you more than clothes. Also who you mention in terms of celebs. I once got called out on mfc after a chat with this guy who was asking what I was into. After I said nirvana, Metallica, and that my fave celeb was Kelly Brook he was like, are you 35? Not made that mistake again *cringe*. I wear pretty lingerie with stockings and heels, like I've always worn. Not for cam but I also wear gothic lolita dresses and get nothing but compliments. Just be confident in whatever you're wearing. If you love it and feel like you look good in it that will come accross, forget age x
Re: Aging gracefully while cute
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Originally Posted by
sexysusie
I just advertise as much younger. Guys ain't got a clue anyway.
I started out advertising as 25 and got away with it without an issue for a while, but then the guys who were watching my porn when I actually was 25 ten years ago started discovering my cam profile. It got a bit hilarious :)
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I'm 45 and have tried to do "sophisticated" and "glam" and all that stuff, but I just can't pull it off. I like being bubbly and happy and a bit nuts and down to earth - and it helps to keep my cam mood up too. Probably scares off the MILF hunters and the subs, but I too find it exhausting trying to keep up an act for hours.
Re: Aging gracefully while cute
Quote:
Originally Posted by
DancesWithSloths
What does a middle-aged "cute" girl look like?
In my humble opinion, when it comes to SM that would pretty much be the definition of 'PaigeLittle'. She walks that line amazingly!
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Mid 30's here with a dominant image. I know the struggle of having to maintain an image opposite of yourself. The adorkable hustle does not work for me at all lol. I try to sometimes be nice on cam and make no money. I must always wear nice lingerie or classy outfits (pencil skirt, etc) my look can be described like half nikki half bree bella. They are my inspiration for my current looks.
It does get exhausting. On days where I feel lazy, I feel that simple pieces still do the trick for me. Nude sports bra with nude panties. Basic bitch black bra with black panties. Simplicity is key when we are in our 30s+ Patterns, tshirts with logos, NO NO NO! Even in your case, with the opposite image...simplicity. Matching but simple lingerie sets, black, nude, grey. These type of outfits allow the customer to build his own fantasies about you, and you can do your show accordingly. I seem to do my best in a pair of tight black leggings and a lacy black sports bra. I still look mature and together enough to "put the boys in their place" but often find simple looks make me more money even with my dominant image. I hate wearing corsets too often but always wear stockings. Stockings instantly pull any look together and they are not uncomfortable. In all of the above photos and looks, each woman has an air of sophistication, yet cute side and all always wear simple outfits and simple makeup. Less is more!
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I second simplicity with style( maybe look up on google some " cute women in their 30" ?" sexy outfits for 30's" and banging ( but not over done) makeup
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I'm facing the same problem. "Being elegant and sophisticated" is so much not me I rage quit it after like an half hour. Will be following the thread.
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I've been peeping cam girls closer to my own age (cough 39 cough) to see what works for them- if they look comfortable- how the room reacts in free chat
I've noticed simplicity seems to reign supreme but also individuality- what story do you want to tell? what makes you comfortable and sexy?
I've seen girls wear atrociously unflattering things (onesies anyone?) and pull it off because its their brand ykwim?
also- who you are doesn't seem to matter as much as what you want to portray
the perfect example was a role play I saw zia on mfc do last week- tats- ear gauges- pierced tongue (I think?) eventually deep throating what I think was a ten inch dildo and somehow she still was utterly believable as an inexperienced teenage girl on skype talking to a guy from school - so much so she had to ban a guy from her room who got heated over her age (thinking she was legit underage)
if that wasn't the epitome of its how you come across versus who you ARE I don't know what is
my husband and I watched her riveted by the performance- I'm dying for a direct deposit to go through so I can offline tip her for it- and women don't turn me on..lol