curious about dancing with questions- advice appreciated
Hey everyone, I'm a 19 y/o with a sudden and serious interest in dancing, and I have a few questions I'd love to hear feedback on. (Questions I either couldn't find forums on or wanted more/fresher & personal advice. I will go ahead and jump in and provide background info w/ each question I ask.
1. Question about the actual stripping- I'm only 18 (19 in a few months), so I've never been in a club and won't be allowed in as a customer for a while. Most clubs around me don't hire dancers under 21 but I live close to a big city so there are a few exceptions. I plan on sticking to toplesss clubs rather than nude. About how long until most of you strip to your bare chest? After 1 song, halfway through a song, 2 songs, etc? Also, do you walk around with your top off?(sorry if I sound ridiculous, I have no way of knowing lol)Do you simply put your bra back on in front of the customers after youre done dancing? Im comfortable being top less around customers, but I simply have unattractive breasts. They're prematurely saggy. Saggy to the point that the only customer that would probably find them attractive is either a really drunk one or a customer with a preference to those type of breasts.
2. I'm 5'7 and a half. I have a wider build, broad shoulders, etc. What's the bare minimum heel height I should wear? I don't want to intimidate customers with my height. I also have 0 experience of walking in heels, but obviously I plan on working on that.
3. I have a haircut that stands out, should I invest in a nice wig? I know my haircut is sexy on me and would stand out against other dancers (short, blonde, shaved sides) but would also make me very recognizable outside of the club which I don't want since I also work another job.
4. I've never been good at dancing(especially not seductive dancing) I'm the type that looks a bit goofy. Also, I've never really flirted with a man and especially not a man older than me. Not that I'm shy, just not naturally a seductress. Will this come to me, and do you girls believe it's truly a practice thing, or if I'm not already the type I just shouldn't even try this line of work? (I am planning on paying for pole dancing classes though, so I don't go in completely clueless)
5. Last question. Thank you in advance for your patience. My partner does not exactly support my interest in dancing. It's not an absolute "hell no", but I haven't completely divulged my full interest to him either. I am truly interested in it but too uncomfortable to mention it around him and all of my web searching has been incognito. Our relationship is long term and I plan on being with him for a while. In others experience, did your partner slowly grow to accept it or was it an immediate one or the other situation?
Thank you so much. Im sorry if any of my questions were silly. I'm sincerely interested and I'm in the process of deciding if this could truly be an option for me.
Re: curious about dancing with questions- advice appreciated
1. Ask the dj when to take your top off. Not all clubs have the same length of stage sets so in one club it might be "bu the end of your first song" and another might be "during song 2" etc
Yeah just put your top back on when you finish dancing.
There are customers into any and all boobs. Don't act self conscious about it and it'll be fine.
2. If your build is "broad" you should honestly wear the highest heels you can to add the illusion of length. I've seen girls over 6 feet wearing 8" heels.
Real stripper shoes don't typically come lower than 5". They are also way easier to walk in than civilian heels.
3. Don't spend money on stuff like that until you know dancing is for you. If getting caught jeprodises your day job dancing might not be a good idea.
Higher end clubs may not hire with an "alt" haircut but you should be fine if you don't look "out there" in other ways as well.
4. Don't get hung up on the actual dancing. Just move slow and sexy, show off your body. Think of it as moving fluidly from pose to pose.
Ime pole classes are basically a waste of money unless it is an actual stripper teaching strip club pole dancing. Pole fitess doesn't usually translate well to the club and tricks aren't necessary except in some stage heavy clubs
5. Talk this through with your man. A lot of times guys don't think you are actually going to go through with it so they don't make a big deal about it until you actually start dancing. Tons of threads on it, a lot of guys can't handle dating a stripper.
Re: curious about dancing with questions- advice appreciated
Men like boobs of all sizes & shapes. Don't be so hard on your's at this young of age.
Re: curious about dancing with questions- advice appreciated
Men like boobs of all sizes & shapes. Don't be so hard on your's at this young of age.
At home start wearing your highest heels around the house all the time. Wear them doing chores and then out side. It isn't just walking in them but dancing. The hardest thing will be wearing them & being on your feet most of the night. Which can cause blisters.
Start at a few hours each day until they feel natural & apart of you.
Re: curious about dancing with questions- advice appreciated
I used to have a coworker with a similar look to what you're describing, wider built white girl with short bleach-blonde shaved sides haircut. This was at an upscale club and home girl had tons of well-off regulars, all middle aged to older black men. Anything is possible yo! Just be confident (easier said than done at first, I know).
Sam's advice for learning how to walk in heels is on point, I was going to suggest the same thing.
Your boyfriend sounds like the biggest potential issue. Not sure what to say about that one...he might change his tune after you work a couple shifts and he sees the kind of money you bring home, or he might put his foot down that he isn't comfortable with it at all. Depends on contact laws in your area. I had a boyfriend who was against dancing at your age too, and didn't start until 21 after we had broken up. Definitely wish I would have ditched him and started younger but every situation is different.
My last piece of advice, don't write off the nude clubs!
Re: curious about dancing with questions- advice appreciated
I stripped for four years. During that time I not one sustained relationship with a guy, not one. Had random sex a few times, had an affair with a married guy. Had an affair with a married girl. But, no relationship. Stripping is very hard on the relationship front. I hope alaska26 can make it with her partner. But, I couldn't.
XOXO
Z
Re: curious about dancing with questions- advice appreciated
1.Ask, they will usually tell you during orientation when the top needs to be off by. Yes, get dressed. Make the next fool pay to see those titties. It's not a free for all.
2. 3in at least.
3. I would get a wig but that's just me.
4. DOn't do pole classes, they are a waste of time and tailored to house wives most of the time, not strippers so it won't translate well. You will learn on the job. Youtube is also pretty good to learn floor work.
5. This is going to be A HUGE issue. You gotta figure out if you are gonna pick stripping or him in the event that he is not ok with it.
Re: curious about dancing with questions- advice appreciated
^^^ honestly I'd try a couple shifts to see if you even like it, like two or three, before you tell him, because you can't take it back, it could be a huge deal breaker for him, and what if you hate it? I've seen plenty of girls quit the first week. You're interest being serious doesn't mean you'll like or even tolerate the reality of the job, or that you'll make money.
Re: curious about dancing with questions- advice appreciated
1. Normally you take your top off on the last song of your set but I've worked places where you're required to take it off on the second song. This varies, so definitely ask your management. You definitely don't walk around topless, not even after a lap dance! Make sure your top is on fully first before getting back onto the floor, too. In regards to the boobs, I'm a natural 32DD and 22. They have a sag to them, trust me .. but to be honest with you in my time of dancing I've never heard a comment about it especially from the guys. Guys love boobs and that's it.. you'll be fine
2. I wouldn't worry about intimidating customers with your height. One of the top earners in my home club over towers pretty much all of the customers in her heels and she doesn't have a problem. If anything, she makes sales and finds men who love long legs / tall women and banks off of it. 6" imo is the perfect height for dancer shoes and I wouldn't worry about going any lower than that.
3. Wigs .. eh. You could try it out, but only if you know how to put it on properly and KEEP it on. I've seen girls attempt wigs who end up wearing headbands to try to conceal / hold it on their head.
4. Pole isn't important in non-urban clubs. The most important thing in my experience is eye contact - seeing who is looking at you, turning, smiling, inviting the customers to your stage. Dancing slowly and seductively is a good thing to practice, but I can't stress enough on keeping interaction with the audience as the most important thing! When I'm on stage, I notice who is checking me out. Glance over (just glance), make eye contact, smile and start slowly making your way over to that area of the stage. Believe me, if the job is for you, the flirting / seduction will start to come naturally. I use to be the same way.
5. To be totally honest with you, while I've experienced some problems dancing and dating, it hasn't been half as bad as I thought it'd be. When I made it a point to tell men from the start what I do, it really weeded out the "oooh so what do you do?;)" guys as well as that "um .. oh" guys. My current and long term boyfriend is extremely accepting and his viewpoint is the job is the job. But then again, he's from Northern Europe and doesn't have conservative values. Its important you are upfront and honest with your boyfriend and all I can say is that if you really want to dance, it'll become an ultimatum if he really doesn't want you to dance. It is a huge problem for most guys who aren't very open-minded or trusting / understanding and it is ESPECIALLY big if you break it to your long term boyfriend however long into a relationship (which is why I've always told guys first thing)
good luck :)