Coming out to your family as an escort?
I've been happily doing this for 2 years, lying through my teeth about where I get my money from and my parents are grilling me harder these days and I am increasingly becoming a shittier liar.
I've had to exclude them from huge portions of my life because of this job, and I'm not able to share my happiness with them because of all the questions that will arise (how can you afford all these trips? so much time off?).
So I am thinking of coming out, perhaps in the form of a letter, answering all the questions that they don't even know they have yet, so they read it and after they've read it hopefully they will be a little more understanding about it.
Then we can have a civil conversation (hopefully), if they so desire.
Anyways just wondering what your experiences were like coming out if you have, or any advice you could pass on. The thought is scary but I ~think~ it will be for the best...
Thanks!
Re: Coming out to your family as an escort?
I wouldn't advise telling your family you escort. They have a hard enough time accepting that their daughter dances alot of times.
Maybe you could say you have a rich boyfriend who supports you?
Re: Coming out to your family as an escort?
NOOOO!!!!!!!
I don't have time to say more than...look..... this will blow up in your face. Don't do it. Better to be considered a kept woman.
Re: Coming out to your family as an escort?
Definitely do NOT tell them that you escort. It will backfire on you because not many people are accepting of that as a career, unless they've worked in this industry themselves. They will use it to belittle you when they're upset with you, saying,"You're just a whore/prostitute/hooker,etc". It can get ugly.
Re: Coming out to your family as an escort?
I wouldn't advise it either.
Re: Coming out to your family as an escort?
Don't do it! Nothing good can come from this.
Re: Coming out to your family as an escort?
I would not do it
Figure out a better way to explain ur money
Don’t flaunt it get a real cover
For example I invested in Airbnb properties and I say I do that
I also made a few legit companies
if anything even saying u have a sugar daddy will
Get u in deep crap cuz ppl see it as wrong etc
U can figure it out say u sell stuff on amazon I don’t know ?
But honeslty either they will
A) shun you disown you
B) use u for money $$$
C) make u feel guilty about it etc etc
D) when u get married etc someone might say something
Make a remark etc
Re: Coming out to your family as an escort?
Nope. Not unless you are 100% your people are cool like that.
While it would feel good for you not to have to live a double life, a lie - unfortunately in this area, being open could come with harsh consequences which make actually make things harder for you.
9 times out of 10 people cannot handle the truth regarding their family members working in adult careers.
Unless they see you with their own eyes - deny, deny, deny
Re: Coming out to your family as an escort?
Without getting into gory details, this is my experience of being outed to my family-
* Several relatives badmouthing me to the point where I have considered legal action
* Constant "what are you doing with your life" lectures from well meaning but stupid older relatives
* Thinly veiled attempts to "borrow" $$$$ that I will never get back- then being badmouthed when I don't cough up cash for a loser relative
* Icy family relations, to the point where I quit sending Christmas cards to several of them
Yes, coming out to your family is a bad idea. You will soon find out which family members actually matter to you, and it might be less than a handful.
My advice- say "your boss" takes care of you because you are an awesome "personal assistant." Trust me, many second families of rich men have been raised that way. lol
Re: Coming out to your family as an escort?
Thanks for all your input.
Re: Coming out to your family as an escort?
I don't suggest it and if you felt it was necessary to lie in the first place, they probably wouldn't react well. I wouldn't give anyone, family or not, ammo that could be used against me, especially in a legal context because you never know. Relationships change and take turns for the worst, even among your own family and even if you could never foresee it happening now. My family doesn't know the extent of my work, but they have a good idea of what I do and that has caused me enough stress. Wendi is 100% right, I've been so kindly reminded that I'm "nothing but a whore" more times than I care to remember. I feel as if relationships among certain family members (namely my grandmother, who is nearing 80) have been strained as a result of my work, and unfortunately I feel I'll never be able to "make them right" again. My cousins don't feel the same way about me, either.
I feel as if I'm the center of familial gossip at all times. Not that it matters to me, but it's unnecessary stress and sometimes it is sad that my relationship with my family will never quite be what it used to be. Mind you, this drama is all based on suspicions. I've never openly come out and told them everything.
Some matters are best kept private.
Re: Coming out to your family as an escort?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
trustfundkiller
I don't suggest it and if you felt it was necessary to lie in the first place, they probably wouldn't react well. I wouldn't give anyone, family or not, ammo that could be used against me, especially in a legal context because you never know. Relationships change and take turns for the worst, even among your own family and even if you could never foresee it happening now. My family doesn't know the extent of my work, but they have a good idea of what I do and that has caused me enough stress. Wendi is 100% right, I've been so kindly reminded that I'm "nothing but a whore" more times than I care to remember. I feel as if relationships among certain family members (namely my grandmother, who is nearing 80) have been strained as a result of my work, and unfortunately I feel I'll never be able to "make them right" again. My cousins don't feel the same way about me, either.
I feel as if I'm the center of familial gossip at all times. Not that it matters to me, but it's unnecessary stress and sometimes it is sad that my relationship with my family will never quite be what it used to be. Mind you, this drama is all based on suspicions. I've never openly come out and told them everything.
Some matters are best kept private.
^^^ All of this.
Ironically my Bible studies as a kid helped me understand what was happening when my family rejected me for my job in the adult industry. A number of notable betrayals are detailed in the Christian Bible.
Re: Coming out to your family as an escort?
I was raised by my aunt, and I owe her everything, but no way could I ever tell her I escort. I do work a vanilla job, but I did have to come up with a way to say how I could afford a new car when my old one broke down. I just said I got a nice year end bonus at work.
Re: Coming out to your family as an escort?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Secret Shelly
I was raised by my aunt, and I owe her everything, but no way could I ever tell her I escort. I do work a vanilla job, but I did have to come up with a way to say how I could afford a new car when my old one broke down. I just said I got a nice year end bonus at work.
In my case I was very very fortunate that I had family friends who didn't judge me like my birth family did. THEY are the real reason I'm not dead in a ditch somewhere, seeing as when I needed my birth family during a medical emergency they did close to nothing for me after using me for years.
The other side of keeping adult work a secret is so your family doesn't spend nights awake fearing you'll end up like a victim in an episode of "Criminal Minds." Unfortunately the bar business & adult industry carry extra hazards against personal safety. (Kind of like it is for lumberjacks and pilots, just not as "cool" or even exciting.)
Re: Coming out to your family as an escort?
I have emergency contacts for such a thing, friends who know what I do and are supportive.
Re: Coming out to your family as an escort?
My parents know I work as a webcam model but that's it and that it's all behind a pay wall. I told them because my ex tried outting me- and failed but my parents are so computer illiterate that they would've never known had I told them. Mom had an inkling, dad didn't GAF.
You shouldn't have to explain ANYTHING to ANYBODY about how you spend, how you make, and where you get your money from. I don't understand the obsession with having to have family in your business? Are they paying your bills? Probably not. It's not the lie, it's the society. Until they can treat adult work like other jobs MUMS THE WORD.
Re: Coming out to your family as an escort?
Hmm, I'd say depends on what you really are looking to get. Relieve from lying or their approval? Which are you more likely to get? Knowing your parents, which will be more understanding? Idk if they will be more involved once they know. My moms side of the family know what I do but it's in our blood in some form lol and my dad will never know
Re: Coming out to your family as an escort?
I told my mom.. she doesn’t like it but she has not abandoned me or shamed me.. You know your parents more than anyone, and I hope all turns out well.. But, it feels good not having secrets!
Re: Coming out to your family as an escort?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
AubreyKinks
I told my mom.. she doesn’t like it but she has not abandoned me or shamed me.. You know your parents more than anyone, and I hope all turns out well.. But, it feels good not having secrets!
My mom already disowned me for religious reasons and I told her to piss her off, further, lol. My dad is supportive, but if it weren't for my ex- I would've taken it to my grave and or kept denying it.
Re: Coming out to your family as an escort?
If you don't live with them, they are not really going to have a true understanding of everything you do.
Keep it that way
Find a 'job' they cannot understand.
I just found out an acquaintance who was doing a personal trainer kind of thing morphed into a personal shopper for wealthy people.
Instead of escort clients, you are travelling to Miami to help them pick out a boat
I know I had mentioned obscure sales jobs[obscure is anything your family has no understanding of] Salespeople have to dress up, frequently socialize with customers......
Re: Coming out to your family as an escort?
^ Ha, yes! I forgot about the sales jobs. Thank you, sir. Personal shopper for the wealthy is an awesome cover idea.
Re: Coming out to your family as an escort?
Absolutely not! You if need to make a clean break and the less people that know the better.