Guys who argue about when the song starts
Hey all,
I had an incident last night that got under my skin just a bit. Took a dude back for a dance. It was maybe 15 seconds into the song. I get started, take my top off, and he is like "hold on a minute, let's wait until the next song". Obviously annoyed, I was trying to playfully explain hey, I already have my top off and the song just started... like do you want me to put it back on and then sit here for 3 minutes?
Dude flipped out on me, did a complete 180 of sweet drunk into angry drunk, started accusing me of being "one of those hustlers" :O saying he will never get another dance from me again and he's done. He payed me, I started putting my clothes back on. Then he started whining that I "didn't even do anything". I said, Dude, you TOLD ME TO STOP. Do you want your dance or not??
Then he went to the bartender whining "she didn't even do anything". Luckily she is amazing and totally had my back, made sure to ask if I got payed, and told him to calm the fuck down or he would need to leave. He said yes ma'm and checked himself, leaving soon after.
UGH... I was so angry I was shaking.
Anyway my question is, what are some more gracious ways to handle that? I am not interested in arguing with dudes about when the fucking song starts. I am very fair... if there is less than 3-4 minutes left of a song, I am pretty generous about waiting or letting the dance go partway into the next etc. When this comes up next time, what's a good way to let them know I am not trying to swindle them but also not let them take advantage of my time??
Considering bringing out an egg timer and setting it for 5 minutes, and charging by time instead of song to avoid this nonsense.
Thanks so much ladies
Thoughts?
Re: Guys who argue about when the song starts
Quote:
Originally Posted by
PinkPopcorn
I'd either put my shirt back on and say "Sure honey, actually I could use a glass of water before the song starts anyway *smile*" and excuse yourself to more important things for a few minutes/til the song is almost done.
OR, I'd say, "But this song is one of my favorites" and keep dancing. If he insists, tell him shhh, sit back, relax, and enjoy. If he continues to persist, go to the water comment and let him calm down anyway.
If he still acted like a retard and said "She didn't even do anything" I'd say, "He'd didn't want anything that I could give him. He wants his whore mother's tits."
Oh my Goddess you are amazing :D that is fucking brilliant!!! Thank you SO much, that is so perfect. The glass of water idea avoids any argument and doesn't take advantage of my time. I love it.
Re: Guys who argue about when the song starts
He just wanted to waste your time. The $20 was probably a lot in his head so by making you sit and talk to him for an extra song, he was increasing the perceived value.
Some men just react like toddlers when told 'no' and that's unfortunately what you got.
I get dudes that pull that shit fairly often. If it's slow, I sometimes humor them. On a Friday night? No, forget it, song starts now. I sometimes lie and say "The bouncer counts dances and he'll charge me for this one". If you can put the blame for the 'rules' on someone else, do it.
Re: Guys who argue about when the song starts
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Selina M
He just wanted to waste your time. The $20 was probably a lot in his head so by making you sit and talk to him for an extra song, he was increasing the perceived value.
Some men just react like toddlers when told 'no' and that's unfortunately what you got.
I get dudes that pull that shit fairly often. If it's slow, I sometimes humor them. On a Friday night? No, forget it, song starts now. I sometimes lie and say "The bouncer counts dances and he'll charge me for this one". If you can put the blame for the 'rules' on someone else, do it.
Yeah totally. He was also acting all shocked, saying "I even bought you a drink". WOooah big spender, yeah I feel really guilty now *eyeroll*
Re: Guys who argue about when the song starts
Drunks have no concept of time. In his case, that timer may have been a good idea since he sounded like a paranoid cheap idiot. I knew ladies who used timers for the longer private/vip so If you have one on your phone or watch.
Some people are just irrational unreasonable especially when drunk
Re: Guys who argue about when the song starts
I've had guys try to pull this and I just say, "Sorry, the song already started, my top is already off and the DJ is counting it as a dance." (Our DJ watches us via security cameras and we have to give him $5 for every song we do). If he throws a tantrum, oh well, hopefully you collected the money upfront and drunken disputes are what the bouncers and managers are there for. If we walk into the lap dance booth and it's legitimately in the middle of a song, I will wait until the next one but I'm not going to start, stop, wait, and start again. Cheap guys will do anything to milk you for your time and get the experience to "last".
Re: Guys who argue about when the song starts
I have learnt the hard way to always get my money up front, for at least the first dance, so if we get to the dance area as a song has already started, I use that couple minutes to sweetly get the money out of him. If the customer is already drunk, chances are it will take him a minute or two anyway to process what I am asking and comply, and any spare 30 seconds or whatever once the payment's done I just chat him up. Then when 'our' song starts, we are (usually) on the same page regarding song/payment and it makes the rest of the transaction that much smoother.
Sure, you could look at this approach as a waste of a song -- but in those couple minutes before 'our' song starts, I can at least act as though we have all the time in the world and my easy demeanour puts the customer more at ease with me. We are not back there to rush, I am not trying to hurry/hustle him, we are there to have a good time. And I can also use that time to increase rapport and find the right angles to work that will raise my chances of getting more songs out of him.
That said, if the guy is dicking about, I do not put up with that! This is often the time IME where the 'cheap timewaster' mask will drop if it hasn't already -- if he tries to jerk me about when I ask for the money. If we are in the dance area, his dumb arse is paying me and getting that dance or he can just get bent and I will move on to someone else.
Re: Guys who argue about when the song starts
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Adrienne7
Yeah totally. He was also acting all shocked, saying "I even bought you a drink". WOooah big spender, yeah I feel really guilty now *eyeroll*
Ding ding ding, we have a time waster. Gawd. Same kind of guy who would think you owe him sex for a dinner out.
They really can't separate the idea that this is not a regular bar and buying us a drink is not seen as a big treat. It's a damn nuisance more than anything.
Re: Guys who argue about when the song starts
Oh, I hate that! The worse ones are the ones who keep track of time when they agreed to, or about to, buy a dance. They just yap til the song is over and yap more for like 20 seconds more then proceed to VIP and start groping on my thighs for 2 full minutes - for free! The ones who do it mostly are my regulars. I combat it but I just learn to minimize the free groping as much as possible.
I hate dealing with drunk guys too. To them, it's an excuse for them to get away with stuff.
Re: Guys who argue about when the song starts
Whatever you say back, just smile and be nonchalant. I’d probably say something about giving a “freebie” session of the DJ’s nonstop talking or something—but whatever it is just be lighthearted with maybe a sense of humor. When they are drunk they are like small children who will take a cue from whatever emotion you put out.
But I agree that some drunks are unsalvagable. Like I’m one of the most mild mannered dancers in here. If you *want* the aggressive mega hustler I’ll bring her over to you. But I’ll charge extra :P
Re: Guys who argue about when the song starts
If they say that I tell them "no worries, I'll just end our dance a little bit into the following song so it all evens out"
Re: Guys who argue about when the song starts
Quote:
Originally Posted by
NakedNicole
If they say that I tell them "no worries, I'll just end our dance a little bit into the following song so it all evens out"
This. this. this. Great advice here.
And always get the money upfront.
Re: Guys who argue about when the song starts
I’ve worked at a club with an electronic timer. I like that it settles any arguments quickly. And we don’t have to worry about waiting for the next song to start.
Re: Guys who argue about when the song starts
Quote:
Originally Posted by
StarryDancer
I’ve worked at a club with an electronic timer. I like that it settles any arguments quickly. And we don’t have to worry about waiting for the next song to start.
Brilliant idea. I swear I am about to start doing this via my phone timer. Makes way more sense especially at a club where dancers pick their own music and you might end up giving a lap dance to a 7 min song
Re: Guys who argue about when the song starts
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Adrienne7
Brilliant idea. I swear I am about to start doing this via my phone timer. Makes way more sense especially at a club where dancers pick their own music and you might end up giving a lap dance to a 7 min song ��
A co-worker was telling me about a Deja Vu out in California that has an actual machine in the lap dance booth. The customer puts a $20 bill in and a ticket pops out. It times the dance and if the customer wants more they just keep feeding bills in. Then you turn the tickets in at the end of the night for your cut of the dances. Seems like it keeps everybody honest.
Re: Guys who argue about when the song starts
Quote:
Originally Posted by
StarryDancer
A co-worker was telling me about a Deja Vu out in California that has an actual machine in the lap dance booth. The customer puts a $20 bill in and a ticket pops out. It times the dance and if the customer wants more they just keep feeding bills in. Then you turn the tickets in at the end of the night for your cut of the dances. Seems like it keeps everybody honest.
I like that! It would be a brilliant way to keep everyone honest, not feeling ripped off and would eliminate the need to pay someone to act as a counter. Do you know if the machine had a multiple-purchase option, like if the customer already knew he wanted to get 3+ songs, could he just pay the appropriate amount up front and it would time the multiple songs? Or did it have to be fed one song at a time?
One club I worked at briefly had a similar system via poker chips + a human counter. It was a very good way to keep track of who got how much money IMO, but didn't fix the problem of disputing time.