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Help!How to lie to customers
Hey,
I’m a newbie and realized i suck at lying. I know we should not tell anything about our personal life but I’ve been having so many customers ask personal questions like where do I work and where my parents work and etc. So how exactly should I handle stuff like this because I don’t know how to lie in the moment so should I just come up with a personal fake life right now and be consistent with that because it’s crazy I met a guy this weekend and he said he knew all about me and told me that he knew my age and that I have a degree and said he heard it from one of his friends so that really scared me I really need to be careful I’m still new so I feel like I can change this
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Re: Help!How to lie to customers
So many ways to go about it. Depends on your personality...
1) give answers almost truthful—but not quite.for example, you went to school that was a close rival to the school you actually attended. Birthday fudged a few days off, etc
1a) give answers *way* not truthful. Cause you will most likely never see that customer again and it can be fun seeing how answering questions differently provide different reactions. Lie because it’s a fun game
2) give really stupid answers to their questions so they stop asking.
3) take more control of the conversation away from personal topics. Push the sale faster to get lapdances.
That is nuts what you said that a customer already knew information about you. That means either you are voluntarily telling him too much information, or somebody who you work with is being malicious.
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Re: Help!How to lie to customers
Thank you! I’ll start doing that! But the workers don’t know my info. I did tell about 1-2 customers my degree info and only one person exaclty where i work but the rest i told them the field i work in. Every customer i tel my real age tho which i should probably also lie about
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Re: Help!How to lie to customers
I really struggled with this, and i think it was because i wanted these guys to know exactly who i was instead of pretending to be some party girl bimbo. I'd talk about my orientation, my degree, i would use big words, the list goes on. My ego was getting in the way of a desire to maximize earnings. I'm not sure if i changed any guys' minds when it comes to stereotyping sex workers, but i do know that i could have probably made a lot more money with a lot less effort if i had just used an alter ego from the get-go. Instead i burned myself out by bringing my full self to work every night, and dealing with men's reactions to my real self. I'm sure i felt validated sometimes, but it didn't have to be that hard.
It's possible that this isn't what's at the core of your issue with lying, OP, but i thought I'd mention it. In most industries, customers don't really want you to be your real self, and in dancing, if you're being your real self, then that's more of a dating / hangout vibe, not a fantasy vibe. You want fantasy / money vibes shooting out of your magical coochie so that you can go home with fat stacks.
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Re: Help!How to lie to customers
If other dancers are telling your customers your business you need to tell them to shut up. It’s common knowledge to not talk about another dancer period. The other girls shouldn’t be telling customers anything about you.
You need to handle that with “your friend.” It may have been innocent, but under NO circumstances should another dancer tell a customer your business. That’s a big NO NO. First, for safety sake! Second, it’s no one’s business. I honestly would tell any girls my personal business either.
if she’s your friend remind her once not to do it and if happens again cut her off. She may not have thought about it, but any street smart person should know better.
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Re: Help!How to lie to customers
Keep your personal info short and simple. Of course, the ones you're comfortable telling to others. You have to understand, customers, staff and dancers gossip. So, watch it and don't be surprise if a first-time customer knows your pet dog's name.
A tip from me: give out a believable "first name" and stick to it. Don't mention name of establishment where you were associated with, like college and former club(s) you worked at, where your personal information can be trace.
Happened to me. Left a comment years ago on a photo that was posted.at a former club's Facebook page and didn't much think of it. Thinking it'll be erase over time. Met a love-bombing regular couple years later and, stupid me out of confident, told him my first name. Then a month later, told him where I used to worked at. As the months went by, I should have paid attention on what he was saying and questioning. Eventually, I found out he knew my real name, address, parents' names, my father's DV arrest, car model and license plate. And he admitted to me later. Then I asked him on how he got my real name.
He said because of a comment I left on my former club's Facebook page. He really searched through the timeline since it was the only one and buried through all the stuff posted there. O_o
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Re: Help!How to lie to customers
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Originally Posted by
305gurl
Keep your personal info short and simple. Of course, the ones you're comfortable telling to others. You have to understand, customers, staff and dancers gossip. So, watch it and don't be surprise if a first-time customer knows your pet dog's name.
A tip from me: give out a believable "first name" and stick to it. Don't mention name of establishment where you were associated with, like college and former club(s) you worked at, where your personal information can be trace.
Happened to me. Left a comment years ago on a photo that was posted.at a former club's Facebook page and didn't much think of it. Thinking it'll be erase over time. Met a love-bombing regular couple years later and, stupid me out of confident, told him my first name. Then a month later, told him where I used to worked at. As the months went by, I should have paid attention on what he was saying and questioning. Eventually, I found out he knew my real name, address, parents' names, my father's DV arrest, car model and license plate. And he admitted to me later. Then I asked him on how he got my real name.
He said because of a comment I left on my former club's Facebook page. He really searched through the timeline since it was the only one and buried through all the stuff posted there. O_o
There are crazy motherfuckers out there. Funny you bring up the dogs name. An asian man came in and was talking to a manager about me once in the past and brought up my dogs name and me. I was floored. He came from the escorting world. Who has the time and energy like that!?
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Re: Help!How to lie to customers
When someone wants to obtain something that's secretive, that person will eventually find it. With the Internet, it's became much easier to find information on anyone. I've heard stories about customers finding dancers' personal info in the 1990s.
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Re: Help!How to lie to customers
It wasn’t another dancer he said he heard it from his friend or brother. It was def another customer. I don’t talk to the other dancers at all i keep it short with them
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Re: Help!How to lie to customers
No i think this is def my issue! I think I’d make more money if i told them i just have a high school diploma and i not try to sound educated
Quote:
Originally Posted by
charlie61
I really struggled with this, and i think it was because i wanted these guys to know exactly who i was instead of pretending to be some party girl bimbo. I'd talk about my orientation, my degree, i would use big words, the list goes on. My ego was getting in the way of a desire to maximize earnings. I'm not sure if i changed any guys' minds when it comes to stereotyping sex workers, but i do know that i could have probably made a lot more money with a lot less effort if i had just used an alter ego from the get-go. Instead i burned myself out by bringing my full self to work every night, and dealing with men's reactions to my real self. I'm sure i felt validated sometimes, but it didn't have to be that hard.
It's possible that this isn't what's at the core of your issue with lying, OP, but i thought I'd mention it. In most industries, customers don't really want you to be your real self, and in dancing, if you're being your real self, then that's more of a dating / hangout vibe, not a fantasy vibe. You want fantasy / money vibes shooting out of your magical coochie so that you can go home with fat stacks.
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Re: Help!How to lie to customers
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Originally Posted by
jenny314
It wasn’t another dancer he said he heard it from his friend or brother. It was def another customer. I don’t talk to the other dancers at all i keep it short with them
Well, I like said. Customers talk to other customers. Just keep things vague. Like high school. Just say you graduated from the other high school you didn't attend. Or you're from another city or state. And just stick to the same story with every customers so you don't get mix up. Because customers do keep track on you say.
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Re: Help!How to lie to customers
Quote:
Originally Posted by
jenny314
I don’t know how to lie in the moment so should I just come up with a personal fake life right now and be consistent with that
Yes. Do you have a celebrity you know a lot about? You could use whatever answers they would use for those questions. If they ask where you work, just say only the strip club. And say you're a Britney Spears fan, if they ask what your parents do say your Dad owns a gym back home and your mom doesn't work(what Britney's parents did back in the day). Or if you're a Beyonce fan and they ask what your parents do for work you'd say your dad works for Xerox and your mom owns a hair salon(like her parents used to).
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Re: Help!How to lie to customers
First of all men lie 80% of the time, you don't owe the the truth or any version of it.
The questions they are asking is rude & invasive.
Flip the script & start asking the very same questions & watch them squirm.
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Re: Help!How to lie to customers
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Originally Posted by
Sam38g
First of all men lie 80% of the time, you don't owe the the truth or any version of it.
The questions they are asking is rude & invasive.
Flip the script & start asking the very same questions & watch them squirm.
Totally agree with that, and you're right that we should be able to do that! But I've found that that kind of defensive response doesn't lead to $$$ in dancing, whereas a sexy fake persona where you answer the questions with lies can lead you towards the $$$. I find that it's normal for guys to ask these questions in the club, since you're talking one-on-one in person (i can understand why they ask - they're making conversation and want to get to know you, so i think it'd be weird to evade any questions about yourself...), whereas the same questions can sound really invasive and inappropriate on a camming platform, for example.
Just my perspective / opinion!
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Re: Help!How to lie to customers
If it helps for you to make up a fake backstory with fake details ("real" name, hometown, school/major, age, etc), then do it and tell everyone the same story. It will get easier with time. Honesty in the strip club can do you a lot more harm than it can good. The reason why we have stages names is because it protects you and your identity. You shouldn't feel guilty about lying if it keeps you safe. These creeps don't need to know anything about you, and it's better if girls and other staff members don't know anything about you either.
I also wonder if maybe you're chatting too much with customers if the conversation is getting as far as asking what your parents do for work. That is strange conversation for a strip club. Keep it focused on sexy subjects and ABC (always be closing).
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Re: Help!How to lie to customers
Lol, i missed that she was being asked where her parents work - agreed that that's a weird one!
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Re: Help!How to lie to customers
I told that same guy about my parents' occupations. Well, told him about mother's job which I recall but don't ever remember telling him about my father's once he blabbed it out. Well, doesn't matter now since i don't see him anymore. Pretty sure he still stalks me on Facebook...
I swear, I don't know why I told him my first name, plus other personal info, since I never give away my name out to customers. He wasn't attractive or charming at all with bad social skills.
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Re: Help!How to lie to customers
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Originally Posted by
trustfundkiller
I also wonder if maybe you're chatting too much with customers if the conversation is getting as far as asking what your parents do for work. That is strange conversation for a strip club. Keep it focused on sexy subjects and ABC (always be closing).
Always, always close the sell. Always bring up the sale even he tries to dodge the "question." Because I can't stand chatty guys even if they're regulars.
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Re: Help!How to lie to customers
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Originally Posted by
charlie61
Lol, i missed that she was being asked where her parents work - agreed that that's a weird one!
Yes very weird! I think they ask because my dumb ass tells them where I’m from i wasn’t born in America so they ask a million questions after that but i agree it’s a weird one
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Re: Help!How to lie to customers
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Originally Posted by
305gurl
Always, always close the sell. Always bring up the sale even he tries to dodge the "question." Because I can't stand chatty guys even if they're regulars.
What are ways to bring up the sale when they start talking and asking so many damn quesions lol
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Re: Help!How to lie to customers
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Originally Posted by
jenny314
What are ways to bring up the sale when they start talking and asking so many damn quesions lol
Depends on the guy. I'd say that if you've already spent a few minutes talking / connecting, which is reasonable, then you could pull a quick line, like, ::sexy giggle, touch him lightly::, "now, i know you didn't come here tonight to talk about my parents... I'm so ready to get naked for you, now. Let's go have some fun!" (get up and reach for his hand to take him to the dance area).
Time wasters will immediately spook at this point, and then you can leave with an, "oooh, you aren't ready? Aww, that's too bad. I was really hoping we'd get to play together! Maybe you'll be ready later, just let me know!" And walk off to your next prospect.
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Re: Help!How to lie to customers
Oh, and also remind him to come "visit" you during your next stage set. "I'll be going on stage in a few minutes - come visit me, okay?"
You can also try for a tip for the conversation if he turns you down for a dance. When you say the whole, "Maybe you'll be ready later - I'll come by and see if you're ready" thing, you can slip a line in, like, "I'm so glad we got to chat - tip me for good luck?" While lifting whatever you use to take tips (side of your bikini, garter, etc.). However, asking for a tip can kill the future dance sale if the guy really does intend to buy from you later. I personally only asked for a tip this way when i was 99% sure the guy had no intention of buying a dance later. This can work well in high-volume clubs.
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Re: Help!How to lie to customers
I used to say "I give out 3 personal questions with purchase of a dance ;) "
It worked a lot of the time, they'd usually laugh and say "Ok that's fair, let's go".
I also used to get kind of sassy with guys when they started with the personal questions - "I don't have any kids, I don't do drugs, finished college, parents were happily married, are there any other stereotypes you'd like to address?" and they'd generally drop it. Most of them (well, the ones that weren't blatant jerks) realized they sounded like jerks and would get sheepish.
The guys that are really pushing for personal questions on the floor before they've even bought a single dance are usually just there to waste your time though so don't be afraid to give them 3 minutes and walk away.
Anybody who asks about your parents is also a red flag to get up and walk away - it's completely irrelevant and also they're probably trying to figure out if you have stereotypical 'daddy issues' or if you can be manipulated.
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Re: Help!How to lie to customers
Quote:
Originally Posted by
jenny314
What are ways to bring up the sale when they start talking and asking so many damn quesions lol
Just bring it up once you start to feel you already gave him too much of your time. There's nothing more worse than some guy you're not interested in knowing run his mouth while groping your thigh for free or for a measly ass drink.
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Re: Help!How to lie to customers
ive been dancing for 11 years and I can't recall one time a customer asked me where my parents work that is very odd to ask.. also agree with the girls, you shouldn't let a convo get there, but that comes with experience. not even to waste time in the champagne room and DEFINITELY not on the floor while trying to get them to the champagne room or lap dance area.
that's what I hate about this job. conversation about 'where re you from, da da da ' is so redundant, which is why I like to quick hustle or act drunk so nobody tries to talk to me. I rarely even sit down with a customer.