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Ever feel guilty taking customer's $$$?
Okay, now I know that my job is to provide a fantasy for the men who come into my club, and that I should be handsomely compensated for it, but sometimes I feel guilty when they spend (what I think is) a large amount of money on me all at once. Just last weekend, it was a pretty dead night, but one customer saved me, spending over $300 (which isn't even THAT much) just on me. While I was glad that my night didn't turn out shitty, I felt a little guilty.
Now, I am not talking about ripping guys off and feeling bad about that, b/c I don't do that kind of stuff. But does anyone else feel bad when you meet a guy who is so nice and he spends a huge chunk of money on you like that?
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Re: Ever feel guilty taking customer's $$$?
they want to spend the money on u, so don't feel bad. as long as ur not ripping them off.
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Re: Ever feel guilty taking customer's $$$?
nah - its not like they aren't aware of the game --they know --you know --its all good!
go to the mall babe, lol!
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Re: Ever feel guilty taking customer's $$$?
as a customer who regularly spends more than that on my fav,,,,I can tell u not to feel guilty at all. I dont think that anyone would take money out of his wallet that he didnt want to. I personally feel like my fav can count on me for a great night and whether I spend only a few songs there or lots I still give her about the same so sometimes she is getting 100 per song or so . But thats my way of saying WOW you really do it for me and I love getting all this attention.
Actually I feel badly because I cant get to the club as often as I would like....
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Re: Ever feel guilty taking customer's $$$?
wish I was YOUR fave, Open! ;)
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Re: Ever feel guilty taking customer's $$$?
Feel quilty when guys spend lots of money on me for doing my job... Naked! (or half), No way. Never.
I just don't have it in me to feel quilty when i am working my ass off and a guy comes along and starts throwing $$$ around.
He gets my time with cheerful sexual conversation, great dances on stage, his pick of music, and...YES table and air dances i am doing now. No contact, during air dancing however. But my ass up close and around his lap.
Never feel quilty when you get paid for your job. Give me more!! ;D
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Re: Ever feel guilty taking customer's $$$?
I have to agree with lurking to some extent. No, you should not feel guilty about a guy spending what he wants to spend on you. It's your money. Keep in mind, though, that you're very alluring, which is good, and some guys will be compelled to engage in obsessive behavior because of their own psychology concerning women, which is bad. So, yeah, some guys will cough up money that they can't afford.
On the other hand, obsessive behavior isn't just strip clubs. It's all kinds of things. Some women, for instance, spend obsessively. And if one store doesn't get their money, another one will.
So go ahead and take his money. If you don't, someone else will tonight. Then he needs to work on his own compulsions away from the club. But you're not his therapist.
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Re: Ever feel guilty taking customer's $$$?
Merely.. you'd like me then ;)
I don't "pressure sell" customers like some dancers do. I will offer them a private dance and if they don't have the funds I will just say to them ... "That's fine.. just make sure you come back soon with the right amount of money".
I also don't like to take ALL of someone's money.. so let's say a guy has spent money on me and all he has left is $40 which will cover his taxi fare home... I will say again something similiar to him.
I always tell the customer "no pressure from me to buy the dance.. you buy or you don't.. no pressure". If I make that clear to them.. I find that the customer is more likely to buy a dance since they then know they are buying one because THEY want to "no pressure"
;D
I hate haggling customers as I personally hate to be haggled.
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Re: Ever feel guilty taking customer's $$$?
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Okay, now I know that my job is to provide a fantasy for the men who come into my club, and that I should be handsomely compensated for it, but sometimes I feel guilty when they spend (what I think is) a large amount of money on me all at once.
Now, I am not talking about ripping guys off and feeling bad about that, b/c I don't do that kind of stuff.
Don't feel guilty, Theresa. Even though guys get carried away and feel compelled to spend $ on a dancer (me included), it's still up to them to realize when to take it easy. In the meantime you should just strut all the way to the bank ;D ;).
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Re: Ever feel guilty taking customer's $$$?
I will totally back off of a customer if I think he's spending more than he should - like with younger guys that aren't professionals, etc - if I think they don't really have the money to spend then yes, I will feel kind of bad. I don't want anyone to feel like they overspent at the club; might make them hesitant to come back. But this is pretty rare and I usually don't have to deal with it, especially since I feel like I provide fair value for the money!
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Re: Ever feel guilty taking customer's $$$?
This might not be well-receiced, but here I go. My goal is to get as much money as I can at work. I get very frustrated when I see other girls pull in more money than I do, especially when I'm working just as hard as hard as they are (maybe even harder!) So why are they making all that money? It's not necessarily because they are prettier or doing "extras"...it's because they are hustling hard - to the point of being ruthless. A fool and his money are soon parted and if it's not parting on you, it's going to go somewhere else, so why not get it all for yourself? Do you think my ruthless co-worker is going to care that she took his last $20 so he can't get a cab home? NO! So why should I? The customer can take care of himself and he should. That is not my responsibility.
When it's a question of "spending more than he should", well, that's all relative. You have to believe you are worth every penny he's spending on you, plus some. If a guy is spending $300 on something that is worth, say, $500 or more to you, then you will not feel guilty about taking it. This was a big hurdle for me...to believe I was worth several hundreds of dollars just to be with me. And once I did, I started making much better money. Think about it in terms of other products....if the person selling it to you doesn't believe in its value, you can sense it and you won't buy it.
I work at a club with $400 champagne courts. That is very expensive and I didn't believe that what I could provide in 30 minutes was worth them spending $400, so I hardly ever did them. I'd see girls (and the SAME girls) go back there all the time, so I knew it was possible. I just started to believe in myself and the value of the customers going back there with me and it's all different now. I do way more champagne courts and I make a lot more money. I do not feel an ounce of guilt because I believe they are getting their money's worth because I believe in myself.
Think of it this way: would you feel guilty about earning $40, even if it's the guys last $40, for a whole day of your time? probably not, because you think you are worth that much and probably more --total bargain! So what is your time worth to you, per hour? If you felt the way I just described, it's more than $5/hr, but not $300/hr? When you start to value yourself more, you will make more money and you will not feel guilty about it at all, because IT'S WORTH IT!
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Re: Ever feel guilty taking customer's $$$?
I always felt bad if I knew that the guy was already in financial dire straits, or when low-paid guys with wives / kids were spending large sums on me. I guess because somewhere in the back of my head there was a little voice saying that taking that money was taking food out of someone else's mouth.
Other than that, the only times I have felt guilty have been when I truly liked a customer enough that I would have chosen to be friends with him, if it weren't for the job. And I think that's more related to the idea of putting a job before desired interpersonal interaction - the idea of not being entirely true to one's self.
Then again, my brain does not necessarily work like everybody else's. Go figure.
McCain
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Re: Ever feel guilty taking customer's $$$?
Well I guess it sounds as though I am in the minority by being responsible for my OWN actions
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Re: Ever feel guilty taking customer's $$$?
I guess I am back to take it another step by saying that having a stranger show you the most intimate physical attributes as well as having the guts to act sexual with you at the same time is certainly an extravagence and should at no time be taking money from someones mouth. I mean there are irresponsible people all over the place. Should the person at the convienence store feel bad when the lottery ticket buyer comes back in time and time again after scratching a no winner????to the tune of hundreds of dollars?? of all the things that would apply to this situation I think this is one that should not have anyone feeling badly about taking money. As it is, only because of competition is such a personal treatment as a private dance done for only $20. in some places.
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Re: Ever feel guilty taking customer's $$$?
Thats so funny that we are all of a sudden responsible for the fact the guy is spending or overspending in the strip club. Gimmee a break.
Someone is always passing the buck (no pun intended lol) on personal liability. If you are on a budget those are YOUR issues, not the dancer's, or the car salesman or whomever you choose to blame for reckless spending. If you work at McDonald's dont shop at Holt Renfrew.
Good grief this need be clarified? Oh brother.
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Re: Ever feel guilty taking customer's $$$?
Precisely, as I wrote previously. It's up to the guy to realize that he's going overboard on his strip club spending. You girls do your respective jobs and make money, and it should be guilt-free, as long as you all provide an adequate service ;).
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Re: Ever feel guilty taking customer's $$$?
A lady should never feel guilty about taking a customers $$$$. That doesn't mean that she should be ripping guys off, but payment for services rendered is fair game.
It's the customer who should feel guilty about spending the "grocery and rent" money on entertainment.
Look boys, If you can't afford to play.... stay home. >:(
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Re: Ever feel guilty taking customer's $$$?
What's wrong with some of you girls? Feeling guilty when a guy FREELY and WILLINGLY spends his money on you? That is absolutley absurd, IMO. Call me a cold-hearted bitch, but honestly, if a guy CHOOSES to spend all the money he has with him on you, that is a good thing! We are there to make money, period. Most guys don't bring in more than they can afford to spend, so go ahead and take it without a second thought.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with us taking the money a guy willingly spends on us, but the key word here is willingly. These are adults who know what they can afford to spend, and are responsible for their own decisions. If they decide to spend too much, it's their problem. If you push them into spending too much when they are obviously trying to leave or whatever, that's another story. We can all tell when a guy is still in the mood to play and when he feels he's spent his limit, so go with that.
Now granted some girls are extremely pushy and will do / say just about anything to get as much money as they can from a guy, but I am not pushy and I am certainly not suggesting we should be. We should be trying to maximize our profits for the time we're at work, but being pushy only breeds hostility and resentment (maybe the guy won't go back or spend money on you at all anymore), so yes sell as much as you can but do it appropriately so they'll feel good about the time and money they spent on you and want to come back again.
Theresa, don't listen to Merely_Lurking or anyone else who tries to make you feel bad for doing your job. These people obviously have issues way beyond spending a little too much money. As long as you are entertaining a guy at work, he is obliged to pay you, and as long as you are not cheating him or misleading him, he is paying of his own free will. There is NOTHING wrong with that. And I say again, our customers are adults and responsible for their own actions, so if they spend too much on us, it's their own problem, not ours! We're not their caretakers or babysitters. They have every right to say no to us, and we have every right to try and earn as much as we can from them.
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Re: Ever feel guilty taking customer's $$$?
I feel if a guy is old (big) enough to go into a strip club, he can certainly watch his wallet. Drunk or not. I have heard many "buyers remorse" stories in the past.
"Gosh now that i look back at it, i should not have spent so much money on her".
And that is fine. Lesson learned. I am there to work, not have emotional feelings for a mans wallet if he keeps handing $$ over.
It happens when buying cars, "shit now i know i paid too much". Houses, ect. The sales people at the car lot do not feel for our ways of spending, as does the real estate agent. Why should we, we are seling a product.
Keep that personal "feeling" from coming into play, and you will not have these feelings while working. ;)
PS treat the men with respect however, and don't ever just TAKE from them.
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Re: Ever feel guilty taking customer's $$$?
I pay my favorite double the going rate here because she deserves it, because I like to be paid fairly at my job, because making it expensive places a limit on how often I can visit (I don't want to be obsessed), and because once I started paying her better I don't feel I can go back to paying the usual. She never counts the money in front of me and never tries to get more out of me.
In general, I don't think you can expect guys to be in possession of their common sense once the old weiner stands up and says howdy, Good Lookin'. We can be fleeced at such times, but if we are taken advantage of and are left with remorse, you won't be getting any repeat business.
While in such a vulnerable place during an out-of-town trip once, a dancer flat-out promised certain things during a private dance (at an appropriate cost) and then did not deliver. I left wishing very bad things for her, but the extent of my revenge is never going there again.
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Re: Ever feel guilty taking customer's $$$?
Ever feel guilty taking customer's $$$?
LMAO!! No, absolutely not! Thats what we, the customers and the dancers, are all there for. Even in situations where I've been paid $500 to sit there and leave my clothes on.
Did I feel guilty that this guy willingly gave me money for conversation? Hell no! He probably got the better value than the guy who spent 40 on a couple dances. I make him feel good about himself, I laugh at his jokes, I flirt with him, no matter how fat, ugly, or old he is. That guy walks out of the club feeling like a million bucks and ten years younger. Hell yeah that's money well spent, and I feel like those are the times I am best doing my job.
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Re: Ever feel guilty taking customer's $$$?
Well of course we're all saying dancers shouldn't feel bad AS LONG AS THEY'RE NOT CHEATING OR MISLEADING CUSTOMERS, in other words, ripping them off. Offering services you won't deliver in order to get a guy's money is not entertaining him for money, and in that case he is not WILLINGLY paying for what you are doing. That is something any salesperson should feel bad about, dancer or otherwise.
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Re: Ever feel guilty taking customer's $$$?
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It is completely erroneous to assume that if a customer is not spending his last dime on you, he will spend it on somebody or something else. This is justification for being ruthless. Go ahead, be ruthless and hustle the customer for every dime he has, but admit that this is because it is in your nature to do this and don't try to justify it and pretend that you are a good person if you are doing this, you're not.
Ruthless hmm. Definition: (adjective) without mercy or pity, feeling or showing no mercy; hardhearted.
Well, I'm the one who paid the cover charge and put my dumb ass into this situation, and the last time that I checked I still had the power to say 'no' and to walk my feet out the door if I'm not having a good time, so I'm not sure where being "ruthless" enters into this.
Truth be told, I've had more trouble with "ruthless" salespeople at car dealerships and shopping for stuff at Best Buy (this computer included). Telling a dancer that I'm not interested in a dance or that I wish to stop so I have gas money for the trip home is rather easy by comparison. I certainly don't think its worth guilt tripping anyone else about my own behavior should I get in over my head and spend more than I intended (and yes it has happened).
:P
Bridgette wrote:
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... Call me a cold-hearted bitch,...
Nah. You don't sound like the type B. So how does "intelligent and persuasive businesswoman" sound? Cold-hearted bitches are the ones that pester, harass, or otherwise throw a conniption when a customer says "no" and think they have some birthright to men throwing money at them. There's a clear difference.
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Re: Ever feel guilty taking customer's $$$?
Carlos - I too have been paid large sums to keep my clothes on, (as well as off ;)) but there again he came in with a different agenda than you and no less entitled to it than you are yours. I excell at the hostessing game, when a group of guys come in I get in there and start organizing and taking care of everyones needs and I provide alot carefree entertainment, making sure everyone is paid attention to jokes are acknowledged and laughed at drinks are never empty and getting other girls to dance here and there; paid and sent on their way...I remain and am paid handsomely for it... sometimes they may ask a dance or two but are so wrapped up in our little party and the fun often I havent had to...this is not my job but I initiate the effort and it is responded to very warmly. These are the times where I really like my job.
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Re: Ever feel guilty taking customer's $$$?
Oh, well, Leigh, no two clients are alike, I suppose ;D. You did mention that you do hostessing. That's fine. It's just when a guy pays that amount of money just for conversation, that struck me. I believe conversation should be a complement or a prelude to a dance or a VIP, and when you're in VIP it's an essential component. Hope this clears things up a bit ;).