Re: decrease in sex drive
It could be due to stress. I felt the same way when Im working and going to school.
Sometimes when I come home the last thing on my mind is sex and it's at 3 am! My ex would be rubbing all over me and wanted to have sex.
Depending on how many hours a week u work and it can be very tiring after couple hours. There are times when Im lacking of sleep and dont want to be bothered by my ex when he wants to have sex.
Hershey
Re: decrease in sex drive
I've found that women with highs sex drives can have ups and downs and like Hershey said if you have a lot going on sometimes sex is the last thing on your mind. When me and my ex broke up recently I was mad I would be getting any when I got home from work all hot and bothered but lately I've been so busy that I barely have time to take off my clothes before I'm passed out. [zzz] And I use to have a sex drive like a guy, my ex could barely keep up with me [winky]
Shayden :-*
Re: decrease in sex drive
Oh - I know what you mean.
Although I am a VERY sexual person, sometimes when I am with my husband I feel like, "Enough already... quit pawing at my tits!" And then I think, "Holy crap --- I'm not at work..." :-[
I try real hard to separate the two in my mind... [what]
Sometimes I get really turned on from working in such a sexual environment and sometimes... well, ask my husband... He'll tell you occasionally I can be a real drag... ;)
Hope this help give you some perspective... :) Good Luck!
Re: decrease in sex drive
Ok now don't yell at me if you think I am wrong but don't you think that what you do for a living could have something to do with it?
Sex is 90% mental. No arguments on that I bet.
So think of this. You are in a crowded room and someone yells FIRE!!!!!!! Your heart jumps, you go into panic and survival mode, and run for the door right?
So what happens if that same person yells fire in the same room of people night after night after night? You learn to ignore it. Like the little boy that called wolf.
So is it that much of a stretch to think that after night after night of a girl dancing and acting very erotic and sexual that it might make her a bit immune to feeling sexy? Desensitized so to speak?
I know that it is a job for you and that you are not attracted to most of the guys you dance for etc etc, but still you go through the motions of acting sexy so maybe it changes your feelings toward sex itself.
Not to mention you are just tired as hell if you work a lot of late hours. ;)
Re: decrease in sex drive
Re: decrease in sex drive
Great comments everyone. I really don't think it is school pulling me down, I think it's the dancing. I've been doing since I turned 18.. 3 years now.
Recently I've been taking a week or two off when I need it. Nothing seems to help. I'm not interested in dating.
What's wrong with me.. I need a shrink or a shot right now :)
You guys are the best!
Re: decrease in sex drive
I feel the exact same way and it is because of the dancing, I feel sorry for my boyrfriend and have thought of breaking up because I feel annoyed over sex. Just my two cents...
Re: decrease in sex drive
I've never been a dancer (duh) or been in any sex-related industry.
Over the last several decades, I and my sex partner have just ran into ups and downs, and it's completely unpredictable. Sometimes worrying about work or finances or the house or stresses can depress the sex drive because we've got too much on our minds - sometimes it can increase it because we relish the "escape." Sometimes we're just bored with things. Sometimes it helps to escape boredom. And sometimes, who the hell knows we we're either supercharged or completed uninterested.
Usually when we come out of our "uninterested" mode, it's a slow process. Yeah, make love tonight... maybe in another couple nights... then we settle down, have a dynamite session, and we're all hormonal again.
I'm thinking that when your stresses settle down, so will your sex life. Hope so. It's too much fun not to. ;-)
Re: decrease in sex drive
There's nothing wrong with you.
The first thing is probably fatigue. You're going to school and working, that's got to be both mentally and physically tiring.
Second, I think xmarx is definitely on to something. I've felt the same way many times. You work in an environment where naked bodies are the norm and people are very openly flaunting and celebrating their sexuality. I wonder if at times the part of your brain that controls your sex drive doesn't get over stimulated and simply shut down. Also, I think over time you can get desentisized some. My advice is just stick it out until you can get a break from both work and school and see if things don't change.
Re: decrease in sex drive
NicoleAnna! We are a living breathing hormone! Whether it's sex, moodiness or attitude. Everything affects how we feel. Remember, work+school=fatigue. Also stress. When our minds are not clear, it's hard to feel relaxed. So just, chill. You haven't lost it. It's just on vacation until your body is relaxed and ready. Here's an idea. I recall one evening, I was so in the mood to sleep, early too, which I rarely do. My man lit a few candles, and....(fill in your own blanks) anyway, maybe he can help your hormones to leave vacation early.
But you know, "have you started any type of medication recently?" This could be a factor. If not, try my idea.
Re: decrease in sex drive
Nicole, why do you consider this a problem? Is there a standard intensity of sex drive that we're required to meet?
I see these ads for male sex drive enhancers they sell on TV. Is this something a man would want if he's not used to getting any? It seems strange to me that people can profit by selling problems to people.
Re: decrease in sex drive
I don't consider it a problem. It's just something Im' not used. I used to be a very sexual person. Now, my looks are even changing. I still work out, do my hair, nails and makeup for work.. but that's about it.
I no longer am interested in going to the bars, or the clubs.. I'm just boring lately, and my drive has just crashed. I really like the intimacy and closeness.... but it doesn't seem like it anymore.
No, I'm on no meds.. Maybe just getting "pawed at" almost daily for 3+ years does take a toll on you.
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I also completely understand! It goes up and down with me. It just kinda screws with you to say NO to guys all day and having them grab at you and "being sexy". It's like, Ahhhh, baggy clothes!! :)
Re: decrease in sex drive
Finally someone like me!! I used to love sex, but now I couldn't care less @ it. I am basically never horny..unless I'm drunk.I have been dancing for 7 years and I def think it is from dancing. I just don't want to be touched when I am home. I want to get in some comfy sweats and lay around and cuddle with my boyfriend. I get so mad when he tries to touch me in any sexual way..I feel like he is one of the customers at work and it bothers me so much. Then he gets mad and tells me it's my job that makes me this way and says I should quit..but I won't and even if I did I don't think it would help. I thought I was the only one who felt like this..all the other dancers I know are all horny bitches..lol.
Re: decrease in sex drive
At 24 years of age i can say that i am bored with sex these days.. all i have to do is roll up in my mercedes, and on top of being extremely sexy, and having alot of money..there is just no challenge involved... *cry* SinPhull A.K.A. The Sexual Warrior
Re: decrease in sex drive
It is nice to see that I am not alone. Some days I can't get enought and some weeks I can't stand the thought of it!!!
Re: decrease in sex drive
Trust me, I've gone weeks without sex and was a nasty evil bitch! [flaming] [flaming] But, then the craziest thing happened, I started dating my boyfriend recently, and was getting it on a regular... [what] [oogle]
So, having a decrease in sex is very normal. Nights, you are tired and don't feel like lifting your ass up in the air!! [laughup] [v]
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Haha funny shit kianna... i like that!
Re: decrease in sex drive
I know this is an old thread but thank you so much for this. My boyfriend and I are struggling with this lately. He thinks I'm not attracted to him anymore. But I really just don't care about sex anymore. I don't want to think about it when I'm not at work. The only reason I do is him, but it kind of feels like a chore. It's kind of sad. We used to fuck all the time. Everywhere, as much as possible. :-(
Re: decrease in sex drive
^^yep, same here. Sex is boring to me now, 98% of the time. :( Oh well, I guess we've traded in our sex drives for money.
Re: decrease in sex drive
Quote:
Originally Posted by SiNPhuLL_Vegas
At 24 years of age i can say that i am bored with sex these days.. all i have to do is roll up in my mercedes, and on top of being extremely sexy, and having alot of money..there is just no challenge involved... *cry* SinPhull A.K.A. The Sexual Warrior
Based on this comment and his join date, this member joined SW when he was 13 years old. Interesting.
Re: decrease in sex drive
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Half Empty
Based on this comment and his join date, this member joined SW when he was 13 years old. Interesting.
His comment stating his age was from 11 yrs ago …
Re: decrease in sex drive
Re: decrease in sex drive
Quote:
Originally Posted by
nicoleanna
I feel silly writing this.. but I'm curious. Lately I've had such a decrease in my sex drive.. it is practically nothing. I think it's from work.
Does anyone else had this problem while working more? I'm only working a few days due to school.. but it seems like it disappeared. I used to be a walking horomone!!!
I'm only 21.. What's wrong with me?!?!?
Sex drive being so complex, it's impossible to diagnose what's "wrong" with you via an internet post. How long has it lasted? How's your nutrition, exercise, and sleep? Does it change over the month? Meds? Etc, etc. Lack of sex drive, unless caused by something specific like a med, or medical issue, is generally multi factorial and may be due to a combination of causes.