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people you know at your club?
So my boyfriend told his friend that I'm stripper, that I'm dancing tonight, and now he [friend] wants to come. Not even sure if they'll let him in. But are there people you'd mind seeing you? What do you say, if anything? If they show up or ask if they can?
Aforementioned 'friend' is also threatening to invite every irritating guy from my last job. Guys that would spread rumors about me or stole stuff out of my locker [unproven, but pretty good idea of who] and crap like that. Not sure how serious that is, but it annoys me.
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Re:people you know at your club?
I don't mind now that I've been doing it for awhile, but if I recall correctly, you are just starting out? That would make me so nervous!
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Re:people you know at your club?
I knew one lady that literally told every guy she knew that she'd have them removed if they came in.
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Re:people you know at your club?
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Aforementioned 'friend' is also threatening to invite every irritating guy from my last job. Guys that would spread rumors about me or stole stuff out of my locker
Your job is your livelihood and you should protect it as such.
There is nothing wrong with wanting to defend the peace and sanctity (lol, never thought I'd refer to a stripclub with those words) of your workplace by being selective with friends you decide might have a negative influence on your job.
You will see the same thing with people that work retail sales, restaurants or other service industries. While you have little control over who walks in the door on their own, referrals should always be selective. There are just some people who referring to your workplace may be inappropriate or make your job uncomfortable and there is nothing wrong with drawing that distinction if you handle it as such.
So just tell them that it's a tough job, you're still trying to get comfortable with it and that you feel it would be inappropriate as well as make you very uncomfortable if they attended. And tell your boyfriend to run his referrals past you first from now on! hehe. I'm sure he means well, but let him know how you feel.
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Re:people you know at your club?
Actually guy did show up and I really didn't have a problem with it, I dunno, after I finally got on stage I didn't care if he was there or not. So, meh.
Unfortunately my boyfriend, as soon as I was hired, told everyone he knew. :P Oh well, most of them are still under 21, so it'll probably die down before they all turn of age.
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Re:people you know at your club?
Don't worry about it :) Just keep cool. I know you might not like these guys, but remember, it's your job. You wouldn't have a problem handing them a few burgers if you worked at McDonalds, would ya? As long as they don't act out of line, keep it professional.
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Re:people you know at your club?
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Originally Posted by Luna Maiden link=board=27;threadid=6344;start=msg69626#msg6962 6 date=1075787523
Unfortunately my boyfriend, as soon as I was hired, told everyone he knew. :P
Some BF you got there. Does he tell everyone about your sex life, too? I dated a couple of Dancers, i considered it her business and if she wanted anyone to know she'd tell them.
Maybe he's great, but he shouldn't be telling everyone he knows your business.
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Re:people you know at your club?
What I don't like about this scenario is that the friends will pick you apart and tell all their friends about your flaws. I had it happen to me. My boyfriend's friends would come in the sc and then go talk about my flaws, including saying things about my kitty. Nevermind that i would never take a second glance at them in a million years. :3dglasses:
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Re:people you know at your club?
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Originally Posted by erotictonic link=board=27;threadid=6344;start=msg69645#msg6964 5 date=1075791051
What I don't like about this scenario is that the friends will pick you apart and tell all their friends about your flaws. I had it happen to me. My boyfriend's friends would come in the sc and then go talk about my flaws, including saying things about my kitty. Nevermind that i would never take a second glance at them in a million years. :3dglasses:
In that case, I'd have been knocking some 'friends' upside the head. Insulting my Girlfriend is one thing my friends know not to do.
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Re:people you know at your club?
No offense, but I think that's pretty lame of your bf. Mine has specifically banned all of his friends from the clubs I work at. They've come in, seen that I'm working and they leave right away out of respect for him (and me).
Furthermore, if they do see you and start picking apart your 'flaws', your bf needs to think about who his friends are.
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Re:people you know at your club?
lame or not, my advice is TAKE THEIR MONEY !
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Re:people you know at your club?
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Originally Posted by Melonie link=board=27;threadid=6344;start=msg69704#msg6970 4 date=1075807405
lame or not, my advice is TAKE THEIR MONEY !
Yeah, no shit. It'd teach your BF a thing or two if his buddies came in and you Lap Danced them all. LOL. He'd learn real fast to keep his trap shut and stop bragging.
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Re:people you know at your club?
i agree with madcap, some boyfriend. blah.. :P
if you really dont want them there, just tell security you know them and they should be removed. its kinda weird haveing your friends (or you boyfriends friends) see you naked like that. they can get a diffrent opion of you and that can be very bad outside of work.
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Re:people you know at your club?
bleh, I wasn't that thrilled about ANY time I see one of his friends - "so you're taking off your clothes for money now?" "so would you give some old wrinkly guy a private dance?"
Me: "uhm, if they have the money for it."
random guy: "EWW!"
Or, my favorite, "do you think you could get me in/for free?"
grrrr, it's an 21+ place, would you harass your manager to let your under 21 friends into a bar? [you can bartend at 19 here, but not be a patron] and the second is even more inconsiderate of the management, they might not make as much money if you're not buying alcoholic drinks but they still make SOMETHING. >:(
Of course, then one of his friends, a guy, started going down the list of his fees for prostitution. :o
But, I dunno, I'm kind of glad he isn't thoroughly ashamed of it or anything, that'd be harder to deal with than taking my excitement over it [I told a couple of my friends] the wrong way.
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Re:people you know at your club?
Luna,
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Originally Posted by Luna Maiden link=board=27;threadid=6344;start=msg69741#msg6974 1 date=1075826355
"so you're taking off your clothes for money now?" "so would you give some old wrinkly guy a private dance?"
Me: "uhm, if they have the money for it."
random guy: "EWW!"
Had any one of my friends disrespected my GF the way you describe, I'd have knocked his teeth down his throat, friend or no friend. I don't talk to mt GFs like that and i'll be goddamned if one of my friends would.
I also made sure to forbid any of my friends to even darken the door of the club my GF worked in (both GFs that Danced). They'd have never asked to get in for free, because I was prickley about them even thinking about seeing my GF naked. I didn't care about anyone else seeing her (That was up to her), but the way I saw it my friends should have more respect for me and for whoever I chose to be with (Since I have such impeccable taste, hehe).
Not to sound harsh towards your BF though. I dunno. Like I said, maybe he's great any other time.
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Re:people you know at your club?
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Originally Posted by Melonie link=board=27;threadid=6344;start=msg69704#msg6970 4 date=1075807405
lame or not, my advice is TAKE THEIR MONEY !
HAHAHA LOL!!! i agree!!
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Re:people you know at your club?
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Originally Posted by Luna Maiden link=board=27;threadid=6344;start=msg69741#msg6974 1 date=1075826355
Or, my favorite, "do you think you could get me in/for free?"
grrrr, it's an 21+ place, would you harass your manager to let your under 21 friends into a bar?
HELL NO! That is lame. Not even my 21+ friends, unless the guest list is protocol (like some bands have when they do a show).
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But, I dunno, I'm kind of glad he isn't thoroughly ashamed of it or anything, that'd be harder to deal with than taking my excitement over it [I told a couple of my friends] the wrong way.
I understand the excitement and wanting to tell people. But not sure these are the kinds of guys I would want to share anything with.
I hope I don't offend when I say your boyfriend's buddies sound like.... weenies. But maybe I'm being too harsh. They are young, and they are men -- fragile, unschooled creatures who require tender guidance. Do you have a riding crop, dear?
Perhaps their (stupid) comments are a way of blowing off steam, a way of getting past some discomfort... You deal with it well.
Me, I don't suffer fools so gracefully anymore... unless they are paying me much $$$ for the trouble.
Kat
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Re:people you know at your club?
Will bouncers always remove someone if you ask them to, even if they are not breaking any rules? I know it's different everywhere, that everyone gets different treatment. But if some guy you knew came in and wasn't a big customer and had no association with the owner or manager, could you have them removed if you knew them? Thanks.
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Re:people you know at your club?
Madcap, I dunno, they do that to each other, like when my boyfriend was considering a male dancers position that was up at another club, basically asked the same stuff. I don't really expect them to get the whole "treat a lady differently" deal, but if they tick me off, I leave the room.
Melonie: Sounds good. :) But in addition to being weenies, they're cheapasses, so they'd just go to see.
Katrin: Hahaha, you fail to offend me, I've been feeling the same way. They just don't get that it is a job, it isn't some game I'm playing because it's fun and I don't mind if I lose. I like it, but it's still work. None of my friends pull this kind of stupidness, even if they're guys, the most any of them as said is "oh, that's cool." or something similar.
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Re:people you know at your club?
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Originally Posted by Luna Maiden link=board=27;threadid=6344;start=msg69950#msg6995 0 date=1075868828
even if they're guys, the most any of them as said is "oh, that's cool." or something similar.
That's pretty much what I said, and say.
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Re:people you know at your club?
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Originally Posted by AnoushBabyGirl1 link=board=27;threadid=6344;start=msg69932#msg6993 2 date=1075866332
Will bouncers always remove someone if you ask them to, even if they are not breaking any rules?
in my experice yes. at least if you know them. but if they do anything even slitly questionable (know them or not) you can have them removed as long as you tell the bouncer quickly. I was specificly told by one bouncer that if my bf, my roomates, or friends came in and he found out i knew them outside the club he would remove them wheather i cared or not. but some clubs just want the money and dont really care about your comfort or safty.
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Re:people you know at your club?
Not to sound insensitive but you have chosen a profession that requires one to 'bear it all' and perform in a partial/full state of nudity...one should ponder this prior to dancing(meaning take into account your personal comfort zone). You will more than likely run into people you worked with, went to school with, ecetera..use this to your advantage, the fact they know you in and outside the club can create this fantasy that ultimately translates to a common ground and use that to rake in the dough! If anyone teases you it is probably due to the fact they are feeling intrigued and are unsure how to act...take control, feel like a wanted gal and twist the circumstance to your monitary benefit!
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Re:people you know at your club?
Just one comment: your bf has a serious lack of respect for you. If he is telling all his friends that you are dancing, and to come visit you at work, then he probably views you as an "object" and not someone he truly cares for. Or he could be young and stupid, who am I to judge?
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Re:people you know at your club?
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Originally Posted by Melonie link=board=27;threadid=6344;start=msg69704#msg6970 4 date=1075807405
lame or not, my advice is TAKE THEIR MONEY !
Melonie, you're always so smart!! I've been reading your posts since exclusivetvlnet..whatever. and I think you're very smart and profesional. Thanx for taking time in us!!
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Re:people you know at your club?
I'd see it this way: If a glamour model has her bf's friends ogling over her pictures and an actress has her bf's friends paying to see her nude scenes, then you should just lap dance them for their tips! ;D