Do you give a good dance? What do I get? Do you give any extras?
Did I mention that I'm a Photographer?
hehe
What's the lamest shit you have ever heard?
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Do you give a good dance? What do I get? Do you give any extras?
Did I mention that I'm a Photographer?
hehe
What's the lamest shit you have ever heard?
Well I feel I do... Full nude lap dance where you can touch everywhere except the inner thigh, between the legs, pubic region and between the butt.. so yes.. you CAN touch the butt. No mouth contact what-so-ever.
Nope. Lap dances only. I can't touch you where you can't touch me.
As for being a photographer.. alot of people are photographers. So what ??? 8)
As for lamiest CS (customer shit) I've heard.. well each shift brings new material. I can tell you something funny (well I know from a dancer perspective it is)...
I was dressed in a Dorothy from Wizard of Oz costume.. and one of a group of two guys (young-ish) comes up to me and says "Do you work here?" LOL :laughing: Since it was such a silly question (HELLO!! Look at what I'm wearing!! and then look at where you are... ;D).. I gave him a silly answer (sarcastic tone) "Yeah.. I dress like this every day". He wondered why I left him :laughing:.. LOL!
FYI, the first couple of lines are me kidding. You don't actually have to answer them. It's me acting like a lame customer who wants in your pants. The question is the last one.
I goof a lot, and it's hard sometimes online to see when I am goofing and when I'm not since you don't have my facial expressions and body lingo to go by (Tho, who am I kidding, it's hard to tell in real life because I am so dry with my sense of humor).
Just FYI.
First of all, any jackass with a camera can be considered a photographer, and a huge percent of the customers that I have met are photographers and would love to do a portfolio of me nude, AT THEIR HOUSE, for free. I'm sure the only camera most of them have is a cheap disposable one.
There is so many stupid things that Ive heard, though this is a great post idea, Madcap!
What can I get for $20? *we are just gonna blow them for their big 20 bucks or what?
or...
Next time I come back, Im gonna give you enough money so you can leave and take care of you for the rest of your life. *are they proposing marriage or just a lifetime mistress?
:camera:
I was responding to you as I would at the club... in a way. Granted, I respond differently to each customer who asks these sorts of questions. I was just playing along too ;)
Here are a few lame comments:
You're too beautiful to work here. *That is the exact reason why I should work here !
Anything that involves them saying "If you were my girlfriend...." It is a strip club not a nightclub... I am NOT looking for a boyfriend... I'm working.
In a private dance "Will you go down on me, I wont tell anyone" Hmmm let me think about that one NO
"What are you doing after work?" Not going home with you
"Whats your phone number?" 111 call me anytime
"Do you get turned on by doing lapdances?" No its a job
"What is a beautiful girl like you doing in a place like this?" I work here what are you doing here
I hope Im not too rude to the customers but I get tired of being asked the same questions night after night
Courtney,
What are you doing after work?
Whats your phone number?
Do you get turned on by doing lapdances?
What is a beautiful girl like you doing in a place like this?
My name's Elija definately wood!
hehe
Hey, I'm not just any jackass! I'm special (but not in that "rode the short bus to school" way). Actually, photography is my hobby, and I actually do things like take classes for it and am constantly working on improving my home studio. That being said, it is a hobby, not my job, and it is a home studio not a rented space/permanent studio and anyone who didn't know me well ought to be damned leery of me asking them to come to my home for photos, especially if they are going to be nude.Quote:
Originally Posted by NikkiD link=board=8;threadid=6575;start=msg72921#msg72921 date=1076589332
Don't get me wrong. I do a good job with photography. Soon I'll even have a website with some of my work. And I'd be willing to pay for some models, although at my stage of the game I'd rather do TFP work. Since it is a hobby, its sometimes tough to justify spending a lot on a model when I'm not even planning to sell the photos. I know the obstacles I'm up against just starting out, so yeah, I'd ask a dancer with whom I felt comfortable about doing portfolio work. Thankfully for me, I have a lovely, photogenic wife who helps me hone my skills.
does your boyfriend perform oral sex on you? (yes, this was asked to me on monday night)
"Do your parents know you do this?" Sometimes I"ll be a smart-ass and say, "Yeah, my mom's a stripper too, and so is my grandma." ::) The funny thing is, a few guys believe me and get all wide-eyed and say "Really?" :loco:
RO-friggin-FL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Quote:
Originally Posted by blondhottie link=board=8;threadid=6575;start=msg73078#msg73078 date=1076625412
Josh, I was certainly not referring to you, Im talking about the guys trying to get a REAL, LIVE girl to go home with them and get naked, for what would probably be the first time EVER. Please do not take any offense, I meant none.
Emilieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeebelle!
Well? Don't keep me in suspense here!
Does he?
haha
j/k
(Honestly, don't say it. I know what the answer likely is and it'll just drive me nuts with envy)
Sadly enough, most of my customers tonight asked me the classic lame, "What are you doing after work?"
Then theres the young guy version, "You should come party with us."
"Do you party?"
And last week, some guys from the local baseball team cleverly asked, "Wanna party with the __(insert team name here)__"
::) As if I'm going to *swoon* at the honor of fucking the whole team. Dorks.
LOL Mariah. LOVE the 'tude!
How bout this one...
"Of all the guys in the room, why did you pick me?"
Ummm, cause I already went up to all the guys who look like they have money and now I'm working my way down the scale.
Oops, I mean... I noticed your smile from across the room. ;)
I know, I've had guys ask me that too. Why did you pick me? Oh, because you're so handsome. And that "do you wanna go party with us?" stuff makes me want to puke. I don't think they know how stupid they sound. Those same old lines get super annoying after you hear them a billion times. Over, and over, and over, and over.... :tired:
I had "so what are you doing after work?"
"you know... my friend here has a hot tub... com'on, you've been in those heels all night, doesn't a hot tub sound nice?"
"how much to get you to go to my motel room? $100?"
"oh, the vip sounds good... wait... there's security isn't there?"
me: "uh-huh, they monitor with cameras"
"oh... so no popping it in you, huh?"
grr. Plus I'm feeling really sick and gotta work tomorrow. :P
PS. Madcap, american gods rools!
That's the thing about these lame lines.. the guys SERIOUSLY do not realise how many times we have heard that one line either that shift/week/month/year..
...and since most of the club customers really aren't like the beloved SCJunkies (SCJunkies have a clue.. most club customers do not)... well.. we just have to suck it up.
madcap...my response back to him was this...(he was a black guy)
"hey, is your wife white or black?" me
"she is black"
"oh, does your wife let you do that b/c i heard black girls don't like that." me
he just kindof looked at me like i was stupid...then said "that is why i am here" ! i told him i wasn't that type of dancer, and walked off to get ready for stage. then the DJ picked right then to tell everyone while i was dancing...that i liked to be spanked during sex! i had asked him earlier to keep my lights low b/c of the marks on my ass from earlier that day...LOL...that customer just came and sat at the stage and laughed at me. oh well....
HA HA... hmmm... well, interesting thread this one is...
Yes, I give a good lap dance and they get their money's worth. I work in a club where no touching is allowed, HOWEVER, if I am comfortable with the guy and he's got a fetish, such as hair, shoes, feet then I will allow him to touch. No men with panty fetishes though! I had a guy recently who was in his 40's and was EXTREMELY lonely, he just wanted to hold my hand, he didn't want me to dance for him, he just wanted to hold my hand and talk and have a conversation.
Things I have been asked:
"So, does it make you all wet doing this for me?"
"How much extra to watch you get yourself off in front of me?"
"If I bring my wife/gf in will you screw her for extra and let me watch?"
And the one I love is this one: when they come back after they pester me for my personal phone number "Hey Gynger, did you know that you gave me the number to the club????"
That's classic.Quote:
Originally Posted by Mariah link=board=8;threadid=6575;start=msg73571#msg73571 date=1076718143
I had a student once tell me she was so grossed out by something a customer said to her she couldn't sleep for two nights. She was doing a 1/2 hour session with some gross fat guy in the VIP room. When she was done, he said to her, very seriously, "Yeah, that was nice, but what would really turn me on and make me cum right here is if you let me lick your hair!".
I still gag just thinking about someone saying that to a woman.
Mariah you are a riot!Quote:
Originally Posted by Mariah link=board=8;threadid=6575;start=msg73571#msg73571 date=1076718143
Tonight I met customer number 30985 to say this one...
Me: You want a dance?
Him: I don't know... Why don't you show me somethin' first?
Yeah right, as if I'm gonna get tricked into doing a free show.
hahaha 8) My friend asked once "why did she finally come over and ask me to if I want to dance? I told him that it is kind of like in the bar where the fat girls eventually gets hit on at the end of the night and you are like the fat girl in the bar.... in here we are like the girls in the bar........ instead in the bar we want sex from teh girl and in here the girl wants our money...... and then I told him that now you know how the girls feels when you just have your sex and leave and don't call Then I told him that a regular is popular with the girls just like the easy girls at the bar.... he gives puts out.....and he nodded and went in to deep thoughts......Quote:
Originally Posted by Mariah link=board=8;threadid=6575;start=msg73571#msg73571 date=1076718143
okay.... I have put too much thought in to this.......... :P