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travelling alone
I've only been dancing for a little over a month, and I love it, except for one thing... driving to and from work! It's about 45 min for me to get there, not too bad, and no I'm not comfortable working any closer to home.
After a long night however, sometimes that drive home is lonely and depressing. Also, NONE of my friends know I dance, so I go through the "what if" dilemma in my head. I carry mase, and it's not that I'm afraid of being followed or anything like that, just lonely after a long night.
I've thought about a dog, but my lease on my apartment doesnt end for another 8 months and I cant have pets. Any suggestions?
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Re:travelling alone
i dunno what o tell you maybe you could find out if anyone at the club lives near you and offer them a ride home ...or you could take a cab instead
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Re:travelling alone
45 min is bad, i was driving an hour and a half and I quit because I didnt like the drive, but the roads were really bad and I landed in a snowdrift once,.. I also hate driving.
anyway... safty, make sure you get walked out by a bouncer, then when you are driving and you check your rearview make sure its not the same car following you the whole way home. a drive like that, late at night you should have no one behind you at least at some point. If you think you are being followed then go to the police satation (DO NOT GO HOME), if they are still following you sit out front and honk the horn, they should be scared off by then. When you get home from the time you park watch your surroundings and make sure nothings out of the ordinary. Before you go to work make sure all the doors are locked and perhaps leave on a light or the tv (or both), that should deter any unwanted visitors. A dog would be a good idea to make you feel safer. They have those fake dog barking machines that you plug into the wall and it barks when a sensor is tripped...
heres one: http://www.x10.com/security/x10_dk9000.htm
its actually cheaper then a real dog. they are also on ebay for cheaper then that.
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Re:travelling alone
When I used to house dance regularly at one club, I also had about a 45 minute drive each way. While perhaps 1/4 of that drive was through city streets, the other 3/4 involved state highways which were pretty much deserted at 3am. This created a risky situation for me not only in regard to potential stalkers, but also in regard to my car breaking down or bad weather/accidents. To deal with this I did the following
#1 - I researched several alternative routes away from the club to the main roads which would take me home. I then made it a point to never follow exactly the same route for the first mile or so leaving the club, and also to alternate the main roads occasionally. The idea is of course to avoid establishing a predictable pattern where a would-be troublemaker could lay in wait along a regular route home. Simply relying on club bouncers to spot a troublemaker within 1/2 block of the club really isn't much protection, if the same troublemaker deduces that he can intercept you at a deserted stop light 10 blocks from the club that you drive through every single night on your way home.
#2 - I made a mental note of every 24 hour convenience mart or gas station or other place where there would always be people present along my route(s) home. The thought in mind here was that if I spotted anything bizarre in the way of cars following me that I could always pull into one of these 24 hour places for safety and throw anybody following me off the trail.
#3 - I always carried a cell phone with me to the club. Just prior to leaving the club I would call a friend. When I finally arrived home I would call the friend again. The idea here was that, in a worst case scenario, if the friend had not heard from me within an hour after my first call that something was amiss. Of course I could also dial 911 from the road.
#4 - I have always invested in a sporty car with lots of horsepower and 4 wheel drive as well (currently Mitsu Eclipse 4wd turbo). This way if a stalker or other road butthead wanted to mess with me there was a pretty good chance that I could keep my own car on the road going at a faster speed than theirs could handle. I'm currently shopping for a new car along the same lines i.e. Infiniti G35 or Audi TT Quattro, because if someone messes with you on a deserted stretch of road your own vehicle may be your only immediate means of defense.
#1 and #2 usually aren't all that helpful if you're a travelling dancer, since you don't really have time for the research if you are only working in the area for a week. But as a trade-off, the odds of attracting a troublemaker's attention are a lot lower as well. But #3 and #4 work under any conditions !
Involving the police in any "car following me" scenario is definitely a mixed blessing. Yes the presence of a police car or pulling into a police station will definitely put cold water on any stalker's plans - FOR THAT NIGHT ONLY ! However, it will also cause the police to ask YOU a whole lot of questions, such as "what are you doing coming home alone at 3am ?" ... "oh, so you're a stripper, where do you work ?" ... "have you been drinking/taking drugs/meeting customers after hours ?". Cops will probably not seriously believe your account of a car following you without some concrete evidence to back it up, or will attribute some other reason for the possibility (like you or your club being involved in some sort of criminal activity - which they may decide to investigate further). This is not a Pandora's Box that you want to open unless you really have no other alternative.
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Re:travelling alone
Hiyas Ti!
I hear ya on that one. The 'city is about a 45 minute drive from my locale, so after a long, desolate solo drive coming home to an empty house night after night can be.. well, depressing. lol.
You're a leo too, so this just doesn't work for the leo mindset. hehe.
Melonie has excellent advice. Get something sporty, maybe with a targa or t-tops, something FUN to drive and take alternate routes. This can spice up the drive home. A decent stereo with disc-changer is also highly recommended since you can rock-out to your favorite tunes to keep your motivation level high for the drive and make it go much faster.
Lastly, for when you do cross the threshold into the dark, empty hovel known as home... pets ARE a great thing, but as you can't have a dog at this time, have you considered alternate pets that most landlords have no qualms with? Bird, reptiles, rodents, marsupials, fish and the like are usually tolerated as they dont offer the same destructive tendencies as dogs and cats (in the eyes of landlords anyways) and they function great as your welcoming committee when you get home.
I've currently got sugargliders, which aren't legal in all states, but they are great nocturnal pets (perfect for night schedules since they wake up at night and play all night long), cuddly, social, bond strongly and love to play with yarn and strings. I'd speak with your landlord and see what pets he would consider okay- most are okay with small, cage style pets without any deposit. Having a bunch of fuzzbutts or scaleybutts welcome you home every night is a wonderful thing!
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Re:travelling alone
Also, in regard to the "lonely" factor, it's entirely possible that other girls that you dance with feel the same way. Even if you don't have any normal life friends or neighbors who you can call on your drive home, you might dial up the cell phones of other dancers who are feeling exactly the same way as you are during their own long drive home after the club closes !
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Re:travelling alone
Thanks for the great ideas, they were definately helpful!
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Re:travelling alone
I'm with polecat as far as 'pets' are concerned. There are PLENTY of other animals who could work perfectly for you as animal companions (pets) and that your landlord is okay with you having.
Landlords generally say "no pets" as they refer to cats and dogs which generally can cause trouble and/or wreck a place (like my two cats have.. ain't getting my bond back!).
Do some research into animals who's sleeping patterns are similiar to your own (awake from sunset to sunrise).