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Contact Dancers: How do You Feel About Contact?
Like many of you, I have worked a variety of clubs, up to and including high-contact ones. For a variety of reasons, iI personally prefer no or low-contact clubs,whenever and wherever possible. How do you feel about contact dancing? Do you simply dislike it and tolerate it, or do you actually prefer it?
In my opinion, contact dancing always leaves me with a bad after-taste: This ranges from slight annoyance to outright disgust and humiliation on the worst nights. However, I realize that other girls are desensitized or simply unfazed...How do YOU feel, and what are your limits? I'm not being judgemental; I'm simply curious :D
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Re:Contact Dancers: How do You Feel About Contact?
I see the other girls get dazed as they are touched all over, but I personally lay down the rules ahead of time and control my men pretty well.
I don't drink or do drugs so there is less of a chance of contact getting out of control.
If the men are attractive or have decent personalities i don't mind a hand on my knee or brushing my thigh. I once let a regular touch my breasts a little, but I was totally comfortable with the one time touching.
I do think girls get used to it after time. Everyone has different boundaries, some of them are very unhealthy.
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Re:Contact Dancers: How do You Feel About Contact?
Personally, I've never seen any sense in doing contact dances. I too have worked in no-contact gown clubs as well as in high-contact clubs...and to tell you the truth, I've done the same table dance in both. No grinding, no tits on the face, no "extras" touching . And I have consecutively been one of the bigger money makers in the higher-contact clubs I've worked at in Texas.
I think that just about any girl COULD make money being as clean as me provided she was a good hustler, smart, energetic, and persistent. As many articles and previous posts on this site claim, the girls who often do the "extras" are girls who are looking for the lazy way out or who for some reason aren't smart enough (or just haven't been in the biz long enough) to realize that they really DON'T have to dance that way to earn money.
I honestly don't think that girls can actually feel good about grinding their butt against some strange man's hard-on....but then you never know...different strokes for different folks. I'm sure some girls will come back with comments that they know they can make money without having to grind or rub their tits on men's faces, but they choose NOT to because it's fun for them...sigh....as I said...different strokes for different folks...
But after over ten years of dancing....I have YET to see a dancer that grinded or allowed touching who has been able to stick it out in the biz as long as I have. I have also NEVER met anyone who gave extras who was still okay with the fact that they used to do that for money after they had been out of the biz for a while. Not saying that there isn't this type of girl out there, just saying that in my experience, I have never met one.
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Re:Contact Dancers: How do You Feel About Contact?
I've mostly worked in medium to high contact clubs, I am used to it by now....I did low contact nude dances in Europe and enjoyed it but the money was not very good because I was competing with legal prostitution. Still, I made a living because I'm a strong hustler and made champagne commission as well.
I would like to try working in a low contact club and see if I could make the same earnings. During superbowl, all of the Boston guys did not expect high contact, and I had such a good time and did not feel that "stripper guilt" that I sometimes get. Then they left and it was back to locals......
I am totally YMMV. The nicer the gentleman is, and the more money flows in, the contact increases. I am actually not big on grinding either, most of my patrons find it uncomfortable, so I use it in moderation. Also, the floor plan of the club I work in makes a big difference. In the dark VIP booths of Caligula, it is easy to get away with anything. I try to keep all touching above the swimsuit area, and I guess VIP breast mauling is just something I don't think about anymore, but I would be happy if it didn't happen as much but am pretty jaded and desensitized.
When situations have gotten out of control, sometimes I felt guilt, sometimes not, totally dependant on several factors. In conclusion, now that I have freed up many of my debts and can travel, low contact is definately something I am interested in pursuing.
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Re:Contact Dancers: How do You Feel About Contact?
I work in a medium contact club, and while I do not "LOVE" grinding everytime I am at work, I am "used to it' as Katrine says.
I will admit, I am the WORST when it comes to hustling, so I made it a deal with myself to work at a less contact club this wednesday. :) I am going to learn how to hustle and become better at working so I can work in less contact clubs as well.
I am not going to say, though, that I "ENJOY" doing contact work, but its not something that bothers me in such a way. I dont feel disgusted, or less of a person. I am not doing extras either. (And for the record, I dont look down on extras dancers, but have to show where my place is)
I would love to work in a low contact/ no contact club and make great money.
I agree with Katrine again....its something that I am used to and dont think much about anymore. But low contact is what I am aiming for on wednesday. :) We'll see how that goes. :)
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Re:Contact Dancers: How do You Feel About Contact?
Medium to High-contact here. Grinding is fine, because I would only dance for clean cut men. I never feel disgusted or dirty because I don't allow touching above thighs (ass sometimes).
I also tried low contact clubs in Manhattan and didn't like it and I really tried to get away with as much as possible during a table dance.
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Re:Contact Dancers: How do You Feel About Contact?
My club is moderate to high (which is funny, because 0 is the law). I go into a mode when I give dances; it's a performance, blah blah, all that, so it's a completely different frame of mind than I am in during non-work hours. I sometimes like it very much when it is for a well-behaved, likeable and appreciative person, aside from that it's normally amusement (for the average customer) or indifference (for the dance, not the money, if it's a kindergarten customer). Only twice have I felt icky afterwards, and that was part of learning where my boundaries are, so I consider it ok. This is the only club I've worked at, and the other dancers all give contact dances as well. I don't know if I have the confidence or experience to be able to give no-contact dances in an all-contact club. My first couple were that way, but I kept worrying about thinking of enough moves to do that close-up and without touching to keep the customer entertained. I didn't want them to feel gypped for choosing to buy a dance from me when everyone else gave contact dances. So I gave up on that. Maybe I shouldn't have, but it all seems normal now. We have a couple of girls who don't want to give contact dances, so they don't give dances at all because they know it would be expected. It would be nice if there were some in-betweenies around.
Although, putting down me-personally rules is always awkward. The customers know the rules already, so I don't want to offend them (and some of them do get offended just for that), but at the same time there are always those who know the rules and will try to push it. It's irritating when I have to treat a customer like a kindergartner. Some customers think contact dances=extras, but as far as I know, none of our day girls do that, and those customers leave disappointed.
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Re:Contact Dancers: How do You Feel About Contact?
I have to say,I have primarily worked at no contact clubs for tghe most part,but also did very little contact in the few clubs I worked in that actually had minor contact.I am withbritanny on this one,I have lasted far longer in the business myself as well giving little contact to no contact.I think more than anything once you do this for a while you realize that men want to feel connected to you as a dancer not,rubbed on like they are getting dry humped,I once worked in a club I was told had no contact,took my first customer back and across from me the girl was dry humping,bouncing up and down on this guy in a so obnoxious type off manner,well I just did my thing and made more money than anyone all night.I connect more with a customer,give great eye contact ,a slight touch of the arm and face,I wont grind but I will sit on the lap,lean back and brush my hair or cheeck against his,all this is still incredibly sensual and will get you much farther than mindlessly grinding a guy for an entire song.Rmember connect with the customer,not get him off.
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Re:Contact Dancers: How do You Feel About Contact?
I forgot to add,more men are interested in the fantasy than the reality,keep in mind you will be more respected doing less contact also,I always did far more dances than my counterparts who grinded all to hell,because there is nothing left to the imagination after that and remember they want fantasy,the whole point is to make them think this women is so desirable I could never get her,you dont achieve that with heavy contact and extras,there is nothing left to the immagination.
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Re:Contact Dancers: How do You Feel About Contact?
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Originally Posted by Lexi link=board=27;threadid=7817;start=msg89797#msg8979 7 date=1080635334
I work in a medium contact club, and while I do not "LOVE" grinding everytime I am at work, I am "used to it' as Katrine says.
I will admit, I am the WORST when it comes to hustling,
I was very much like Lexi- hustling just wasnt my thing and for the most part and I had to work alot harder to get dances in no contact clubs~ it seemed like no contact customers like to play alot of BS mind games and those guys were always wanting to see me outside the club instead >:(
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Re:Contact Dancers: How do You Feel About Contact?
when i first started dancing there really wasnt such a thing as a lapdance. no contact just stage. then it was tablesides with very limited contact. then it went to full lapdancing here in tampa with no other options (no dollhouse ect then). ive worked in all types of clubs since that time. when the lapdancing started i didnt care at the time and worked high contact. after i left tampa i went to memphis... again high contact. came back to fl and worked in cocoa beach, light contact. the club i work at now is light contact. now i couldnt handle the high contact. im used to being respected and put on a pedestal so to speak. i make more money now. i made a trip back to memphis about 4 years ago and couldnt handle it i felt like a piece of meat. not that i look down on those girls in tampa and memphis, i just personally have been there done that and dont ever choose to do it again. the guys are so jaded in those towns. it's refreshing to let a guy brush you and be happy with that (for the most part, not all are of course) then to expect you to let them finger you or worse.
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Re:Contact Dancers: How do You Feel About Contact?
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Originally Posted by Rayanna link=board=27;threadid=7817;start=msg89881#msg8988 1 date=1080667890
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lexi link=board=27;threadid=7817;start=msg89797#msg8979 7 date=1080635334
I work in a medium contact club, and while I do not "LOVE" grinding everytime I am at work, I am "used to it' as Katrine says.
I will admit, I am the WORST when it comes to hustling,
I was very much like Lexi- hustling just wasnt my thing and for the most part and I had to work alot harder to get dances in no contact clubs~ it seemed like no contact customers like to play alot of BS mind games and those guys were always wanting to see me outside the club instead >:(
Yup! Rayanna, you did work at ggr too, a few times right? :) They have that ticket thing that gets ya spoiled! hehehe But yeah I am trying the low contact so I can learn how to hustle and possibly do many days a month working at the low contact clubs and keep my other job so I can still have those extra days with a lot of money.
Michelle, I know what your saying about the guys "having" more respect for low contact dancers. But from what I have seen most men dont really have soooo much more respect towards ANY dancers, no matter what they do. When I did work in a sister club one time (less contact) they still asked me, "Why do you do this?" yadda yadda
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Re:Contact Dancers: How do You Feel About Contact?
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Originally Posted by michele link=board=27;threadid=7817;start=msg89878#msg8987 8 date=1080666303
,keep in mind you will be more respected doing less contact also
Hmmm, I don't know about that ~
It seems to me that the typical ( not all ) customer respects the contact dancer more, just take a look over at SCJ :-\ there are several of them that say they wont buy an air dance at all.
Sadly to me it looks like a few of them maybe even go so far view a no extras dance as completly worthless :frown:
Thats obviously not a true representation of the overall customer base since air dances are bought everyday... but it does make me wonder :pessimist:
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Re:Contact Dancers: How do You Feel About Contact?
I've danced in both no contact up to med to high contact; and I prefer no to little contact. the first club i started at had lewd laws that prevented any contact, squat and spread,and we didn't give lap dances. Although we were fully nude with liquor. I spent the majority of my time dancing at this club, so this is what i became accostumed to, and where my comfort level is at.
I'm looking in to going back into dancing within a year; so I'm considering clubs with Light contact, nothing more. I found that I maintained respect for myself much easier when i wasn't working at the med to high contact clubs. This is just my personal comfort level. If others are comfortable doing more i think thats great and probably can be very sexualy liberating.
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Re:Contact Dancers: How do You Feel About Contact?
OKay, quick question: Being that I am in Canada, what do you ladies consider high contct, medium contact, and low contact? I want to post but need a scale of what we are talking about! I realize it varies from club to club but is there some sort of general idea about what each of these are?
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Re:Contact Dancers: How do You Feel About Contact?
Lexi,when you give scores or pec a try,let me know if you still feel the same way( disrespected by cutomers),I dont believe you will feel that way when you are in vip earning 400-600 an hour to just sit,have wonderful conversation and sip on crystal or maybe some lobster or filet mignon,I think you will have a change of heart.Rayana come on you are smarter than to take what some guys on some board are saying as gospel,well ,I dont go on any other sites and most business men are not sitting on some site talking about contact dances and the like.All I can do is qoute things from my experience,but when I did work in a light lap dance club I was highly respected by my fellow dancers,customers and management,for being a clean dancer.
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Re:Contact Dancers: How do You Feel About Contact?
Quote:
Originally Posted by michele link=board=27;threadid=7817;start=msg89876#msg8987 6 date=1080666056
I have to say,I have primarily worked at no contact clubs for tghe most part,but also did very little contact in the few clubs I worked in that actually had minor contact.I am withbritanny on this one,I have lasted far longer in the business myself as well giving little contact to no contact.I think more than anything once you do this for a while you realize that men want to feel connected to you as a dancer not,rubbed on like they are getting dry humped,I once worked in a club I was told had no contact,took my first customer back and across from me the girl was dry humping,bouncing up and down on this guy in a so obnoxious type off manner,well I just did my thing and made more money than anyone all night.I connect more with a customer,give great eye contact ,a slight touch of the arm and face,I wont grind but I will sit on the lap,lean back and brush my hair or cheeck against his,all this is still incredibly sensual and will get you much farther than mindlessly grinding a guy for an entire song.Rmember connect with the customer,not get him off.
I work at a NO CONTACT club (VIP's). I love it. If they ask if they can touch, I give them a list of places they CANNOT (anything that has jewelry, thong, or pasties...lol which pretty much leaves my hair). I like to tease them like that. They get all "offended" that they are paying good money to not touch. But, who knew...they buy dance after dance after dance. In a no contact club, its amazing what a little brush across the arm or a well-timed eye contact will do. It opens up their imagination and that's, what I found, keeps them coming back.
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Re:Contact Dancers: How do You Feel About Contact?
Yes venus,let me tell you its amazing how much money I made at vip,doing nothing but sitting on my but in vip.Are guys aloud to touch you now?Ithink we are on the same page.
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Re:Contact Dancers: How do You Feel About Contact?
I work at a medium to high contact club. I've worked at zero contact places in Georgia and prefer my current situation. My money skyrocketed when I Moved to TX, which is considerably high contact. Houston is, anyway. I choose my customers very carefully. They are all clean-cut and have a good aura about them. These guys are very respectful . Sometimes they are so nice that I don't mind climbing on and giving them a great dance. They aren't grabby and they are paying me handsomely- - -I express my sensuality through touch for the most part. Words are fine, I like great conversation. In Houston, men are much less likely to spend $500/hr to just sit and talk with you. I don't find it so ridiculous; I prefer to work for my money.
Grinding only bothers me when I make an error in judgment and dance for Mr. Grabass, Mr. Le Pew, or Mr. Inebriated. I give airdances in those instances and pray that they don't ask for another.
Other than that, I don't mind giving bad-ass lapdances. i'm not very inhibited to begin with and I make enough money in a night to live off of for a couple of weeks. It isn't so bad. Don't hate me for being honest.
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Re:Contact Dancers: How do You Feel About Contact?
Well I got into this business originally because I thought it looked like fun. All the money I saw flowing around looked pretty damn good too, but I NEVER would have done it if I didn't think it would be fun.
It is fun. I've been at it going on 9 years now, and other than the first year or two when no contact was the norm, I've pretty much been a low-medium (one-way) contact dancer. It doesn't bother me one bit and I resent the remarks on here, implying contact dancers can't hang. I reckon I've managed pretty well thank you, and I still do. I don't let things go beyond my comfort zone and I am pretty diligent about following the rules at whatever club I'm working. I've worked every type of club from zero contact to high contact. I tended to be on the lower side in the high contact places and still made good money. I know how to hustle. Right now I'm at a low-medium contact club and it fits perfectly with my comfort level. I am consistently one of the top earners (always have been) and I have not slowed down.
I do prefer less or no contact if the money is there, but that just isn't the deal at most clubs. The only reason I prefer lower/no contact is simply that it is always nice to do less work and still get paid! I do grind, not what I consider heavy, and it doesn't bother me in the least. Never has. I never for one second felt guilty about something I did as a dancer, and the only reason I've ever come out of a situation feeling negative was when a customer gave me a hard time and I was annoyed or pissed off at him. I know my comfort level and stick to it, and make the guys stick to it also. Any boundary-testing I've done was years ago and it was me testing my own boundaries. In that time I did allow some minor 2-way contact with guys I felt comfortable with. I never once passed the point where I wasn't comfortable and I never felt bad about anything I did. I simply decided those contact levels were not for me and that was that. I have no regrets.
I am totally against girls doing extras in the club and going above normal contact levels in whatever club because it distorts demand and competition. But honestly I don't understand why so many girls here seem so uptight about contact and even look down their endlessly upturned noses at contact dancers. For chrissakes girls, we do more for free all the time than what some on here claim to be doing at work and making $1k every night. Perhaps I'm a bit jaded, but seriously, if there are clubs where anyone here is making $1k (or close) every night, and I mean 4 nights per week, not just one or two, with zero contact, I wanna know about it!
/ :soapbox:
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Re:Contact Dancers: How do You Feel About Contact?
I dont turn my nose up at girls who do some contact,I have done some myself,I dont mind letting a guy touch my legs arm and back,or hair and I dont mind touching their face ,chest or hair,I just personally find it disgusting when girls ,let guys touch their privates,grind their asses without getting up once for like the entire song or three or facing a guy with thier legs spread on either side and grinding their pussy on their dick,I find it unecessary and degrading.
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Re:Contact Dancers: How do You Feel About Contact?
Well...
As I said there would always be a few who didn't mind the way a strange man's hard on felt on their ass....
As for doing more for free than I would ever do at work....duh....that's what it's supposed to be Bridgette. I give it to my man freely because I love him....I don't give it away to anyone for money because to do it for money is against my moral code. And as I said....different strokes for different folks...I just had to set this straight...the free versus paid thing.
I don't look down on girls who do "extras" and grinding...I still just think that they don't realize they CAN make the money without doing them if they will be smart about it...hustle, be energetic, firm, and persistent....sigh I make money ALL THE TIME in Texas where a lot of girls grind, hell, there's been times when I'm the only girl in the club not being manipulated into thinking that I have to do that to make money (and for money). I am consistently one of the top money makers in these clubs, just as Michele has stated that she was too. All I am trying to say...is that no one has to do ANY of that if they DON'T want to...give it a try and a little practice, and soon you will be making the same money with no grinding, no tits on the face, and no extras touching!!
I know some girls get tired of feeling like girls who "know the game" are always looking down on them...let me assure you, this is not the case (at least with me).
Also, if anyone would like to know some of the clubs in which you can make 1000 a night being clean...why don't you try Chicago, New York City, the Paradise in Vegas, etc. But keep in mind - I make GREAT money here in Texas doing total AIR while most of the other girls get paid the same 20 for doing a whole lot more. I'm making the same money a night that I did before the whole economy thing went to crap! And believe me, I make about the same NO MATTER WHERE I work...that's one of the joys of being a damn good hustler, and a damn good worker.....no matter where I go, I know I am usually guaranteed at least XXX amount...don't have to rely on regular customers, or finding the "right" guy, or hoping I won't run into some sleeze who will make me feel bad about myself and the way I am dancing.
And again...let me state, I'm not intending to look down on anyone in any way...merely trying to say to people that they really don't have to dance that way for money if they don't want to if they will hustle, practice, be energetic, persistent, firm, etc. I will say that learning how to hustle took a little practice. It took me a few months to get the hang of it after I started dancing (I realized in the first few months I'd rather be one of the hustlers than one of the grinders). But it has more than paid off...financially, emotionally, spiritually, personally, etc.
But to each their own...if anyone out there is one of the FEW who actually doesn't mind the grind...more power to you I guess! I just wish I could find out after you've been out of the biz for a while and are no longer desensitized if you will feel the same way!! Maybe you will and maybe you won't...but good luck to you either way! Cheers!
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Re:Contact Dancers: How do You Feel About Contact?
I'm a lousy-ass hustler, I'll admit it. Unfortunately a lot of the best sales techniques I know I'm not good at, I don't remember names, I can't take 3 seconds and immediately change my personality to fit the guy. About the only thing I can do is always be cheerful and I can generally have a conversation with anyone as long as they speak occasionally. I try not to spend any time talking with other dancers if humanly possible, if there is only one customer not otherwise engaged, I'll at least sit with him.
I work high contact, two-way contact with g-string on, grinding, you/they can touch anything but breasts and crotch. Honestly, it depends on the customers. Sometimes I feel awful after giving a VIP dance [or several] to such and so. Sometimes I'm indifferent. I can't say I'm happy too often, cheered by compensation is more like it. Not only money, but how he treats you during a dance, an indifferent or happy guy is one thing, a guy who is trying to manipulate you is crappy. I had one guy say "if you want to do anything... special... I'll compensate.." which honestly didn't bother me. The guys who try to finger you and figure it's a reasonable deal and then whine about your standards [which are well within club standards] are just more emotionally draining.
Anyway, grinding against a hard-on, squishing boobs in face, straddling face, etc. etc. doesn't bother me in of itself.
No contact really isn't an option for me, I'd be curious to see how that went. Maybe one day. heh.
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Re:Contact Dancers: How do You Feel About Contact?
Customers View-
Well living in Houston kinda spoils you. We have some 55 strip clubs and something for everyone here. I'm the kind of customer who likes to sit and relax and let the girl do her dance. If the dancer likes you and is having a good time, most times you will recieve a great dance. I sit there with my hands to my side and no matter how close her body gets to my face I never open my month, other than to talk. This relaxes most girls and the dances I get shows that. The funny thing is at least 5 times I have had a girl turn around upset and ask whats wrong. I ask why and she says because I have not touched her. I say I'm just being respectable this has lead them to put my hands on there hips, tits and one of them said please touch anywhere except where she had cloths on.
Then I travel to a low or no contact club and I'll be honest I find it rough to enjoy myself. Seeing the dancer 3 feet away when I'm used to them being close is hard to get used to. Many times I don't feel a part of the dance. I also think at that distance, you can tell who can be seductive or not and who really knows how to give a chair/floor dance, at close range it's more just the girls body language, her prefume, how her hair feels, I just seem to notice many other things. The times I have had a great time, it was usually because I met an interesting dancer. The ones that like to talk and had fun, interesting things to say were the top. One of my best times ever was at a no contact club in seattle, where I just met an amazing swedish girl who was a blast.
As far as repect, i'm sorry but there is no difference to me in what level of contact a girl does and the respect I have for her. She gets my respect by how she treats me and other people, how she treats life. Is she friendly and helpful to others? Does she care about others and not just herself.
Here is an example- A high dollar prostitute who did her job but spent all the of her time and money outside of work helping abused mothers and children. What if she had used the money to buy a house for the moms to live in till they got back on there feet and she paid for everything and help save many lives.
I could compare this to the low contact dancer that used all of her money to buy plastic surgery and cloths for herself, never helped anyone and was pissed off at the world because she could never be a perfect 10.
Who would you respect more?
A dancer example- Twice I have been partying at a club, enjoying myself and after getting a bunch of dances, I paid the dancer, they walk off. Only to return a minute later and say I overpaid for the dances and gave me $20 and $80 the other time back. I was so shocked I almost fell over. The funny thing is at that moment I knew that these were special girls, they wanted to earn my money but not rip me off. They now had my trust. Not only did they earn my respect but they earned 20 times what they returned from me in the future. I came back many times just to see them. I ended up dating the second one.
How many of you would return the money? or do the "he was drunk and deserved it", "fool can't count", "my gain, his loss", etc.
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Re:Contact Dancers: How do You Feel About Contact?
It is very interesting that this thread showed up.
I have been 'raised' as a stripper in a moderate to high contact environment. Also.. this contact is two way. The current club I work at seems to offer the most contact... the customer (and dancer to customer) can touch everywhere EXCEPT between the legs, inner thigh, between the butt cheeks and pubic area plus NO MOUTH CONTACT (and all that entails).
We are also supposed to keep our crotch away from his crotch however some of the dancers at my club seem to get away violating this rule on a regular basis.
I've reached a point where I want to last another 5 years in this business and realise that if I keep myself in this environment... I won't last.
When I go back to work tonight (Wednesday)... I'm even going to adjust my routine so that the contact is kept to moderate not high.
At the same time, for the customers that I enjoy and like.. I do not mind pushing the envelope. I'm going to now reserve my high contact dances for those who are respectful enough towards me.
I don't mind customers touching me if it is in a sensual manner... I've had some great really sensual moments (sigh) from some customers. They aren't often however they do happen.
I'm going to try a low-moderate contact environment in the very near future.
The perfect club for me would be one where I could make alot of money giving table side dances (with no contact) or low-moderate contact lap dances.
Due to the moderate-high contact nature of the scene here on the Gold Coast... I'm de-sensatized when someone touches my boobs.
I gave generally on the lower end of high contact lap dances (2 way) however thanks to a two incidents (one last month, one this month)... I'm going to see how I go with dances that involve less contact that I usually did.
Mentally I _know_ I wouldn't be able to handle moderate to high contact for the next 5 years. Hence the reason why I want to try other clubs which have a rep for low or moderate contact.