Re:Potential Sugar Daddy?
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Any suggestions on how to proceed?
VERY carefully !
Seriously, if this guy has spent lots of money on you both inside and outside of the club, and wants to take you out to dinner this weekend, it sure sounds to me like he's trying to buy his way into your private life. You've already taken a step "over the line" by going shopping with him and accepting his generosity, so from here on out it's going to be difficult to back away gracefully. I would guess that the guy already thinks of himself as "somebody special" to you.
The unanswered question is whether he's taking a professional attitude in that regard (i.e. Sugar Daddy) or seriously thinks that you're romantically interested.
Whether or not the guy is taking a professional attitude will also predict his reaction if you attempt to say no to future offers.
Re:Potential Sugar Daddy?
No guy wants to be a sugar daddy for nothing. Guys who take us shopping on big $$ shopping trips usually want their reward to either be SEX, or a relationship with you. Sometimes, but rarely, the shopping is just thier way of thanking you for spending time with them.
To me, a 'sugar daddy' who only buys one dance or spends only $150 for your personal time with him is just not worth the effort. When he asks you to dinner tell him you are working on such and such night, and that he should visit you at work. Then only spend time with him if he's buying dances.
Re:Potential Sugar Daddy?
Paige, I can speak with a modicum of experience. Trust me, an occasional dance and a $150 shopping trip does not a sugar daddy make. He could just be throwing some warm up pitches in the bullpen but theres also a real chance hes clueless and thinks hes a player :o.
I was a Sugar Daddy of sorts to my ex-ATF in Indianapolis several years ago. We started out casually in the club doing dances and such but over time it evolved to the next level. I wound up taking care of her rent and car payment plus a nice amount of mad money. Over the course of about 12 months I spent well over $20,000. The cookie was available whenever I wanted it so it wasnt all one sided. But as Mariah said, no guy is gonna be a Sugar Daddy and not expect anything unless hes a retard.
Theres a young lady at my current club here in Dayton (I call her Miss D in my posts on the Blue Site) with whom Im enjoying a similar but comparatively subdued relationship. Its more of a quasi-Sugar Daddy thing. We have lunch or dinner from time to time, hang out at the club and a few times a month get together for some fun and games. So far, its working out well. She makes plenty of money at the club plus has a profession in her "other" life. I'm still paying, of course, but there is less pressure.
I strayed off topic a bit...sorry about that LOL If the idea of having a Sugar Daddy is interesting to you by all means pursue it. But if you feel like you might be getting sucked into something that is fundamentally against your ethics then ditch him. He's made his moves such as they are and you will probably have to let him down hard.
FBR
PS: Where in Ohio are you ;) ;D
Re:Potential Sugar Daddy?
FBR: That's what I was thinking, that it may be a "warm up". I was thinking that also partially because (this is kind of hard to explain, but I'll try) I got some merchandise that if I do not pay for, it will end up on his credit card. Like $850 worth.
I appreciate everyone's advice and agree with it. I think that I'll probably just ask him what it is he wants (hopefully in a tactful way, but if he doesn't get it I'll have to be straightforward).
Re:Potential Sugar Daddy?
Girl, don't do anything that makes you question his motives or yourself. Sounds to me like he isn't a sugar daddy but someone trying to buy his way into your pants. This probably sounds weird coming from me since my other half uses the nick SugahDaddy on here but he has never tried to buy his way into anything where Im concerned he doesnt have to. Besides, if he thinks he has to use money to impress you and not his personality, it could very well turn nasty if you ever reject him.
Re:Potential Sugar Daddy?
Hi paige
Kept women is my forte. I left the bar scene a long time ago. Unless you just can't stand the guy hang in there with him. When he took you shopping thats what some on my buddy's do for there women. For them is more CHARITY that being sugar daddy. they will even buy for their kids too. One of them told me that a dancer was interested in him and he told her that she was to BEAUTIFUL for him. But my friend might be interested. A female exotic Dancer usually it not wanted Personally for a relationship by guys. ( to much drama) it's either sex or to show you off in public. many a man wants to sleep with britney spears. But very few would want her for his significant other. Hope thats helps.
Re:Potential Sugar Daddy?
Girl, listen up.......He needs to spend a whole hell of a lot more money on you for you to spend your time with him!!!!!!! IF you dont hustle him he'll definitely hustle you.
Re:Potential Sugar Daddy?
I have one question. Is a sugar daddy a guy who spends lots of money on you just because he likes you? Or do you actually have to sleep with him in return? I've been dancing for over 2 years and I still don't really know exactly what having a "sugar daddy" means.
Re:Potential Sugar Daddy?
a good thing to try is to say that you have to work the night he wants to take you to dinner, if he wants to take care of you he will step up and tell you not to go to work, that he will pay you for your time. but be carefull because he could want sex in return. the best thing is to talk to him to see where he is coming from
Re:Potential Sugar Daddy?
A sugar daddy?...I very almost got tangled in that web but escaped before it got too uncomfortable. He was pushing for a deeper relationship when I had clearly stated it was not to be a serious thing. He knew I danced yet it was not dance related (I met him through an acquaintance). We still keep in touch but believe it or not, he still does not know my real name (lol! And this has been going on for over 2 years!!)
But what I'm trying to say is what Melonie said. Be careful. The bling-bling of presents is a bait but it is in no way to be traded for your personal life. The hassle isn't worth it. I had enough headache when I tried to get out of my short-lived relationship. Just value what's worth it. And also remember that if you met him at work, it can put your job on the line!
Re:Potential Sugar Daddy?
A sugar daddy may just like you or want sex. it varies according to the person. many a professional desire a SECURE female companion without the in and outs and ups and downs that a short and long term relationship may bring. One of the reasons that I have kept women is the hassle freedom. It's a win win situation. But it's not for everyone. It's easy to fall for someone that you are spending time with and appreciate. I let my women handle ALL their ex's on their own without my interference. You have to be a real person in the sense of business , economic and social realities. then you will be able to approach a sugar daddy relationship without falling apart at the seams. it's more of escorting that exotic dancing. hope that helps.
.( Hassle Free) Thats one of the reasons I Kept women. ( Little drama)
Re:Potential Sugar Daddy?
150 is little too cheap /..
Re:Potential Sugar Daddy?
he wants some BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Re:Potential Sugar Daddy?
I don't have a sugar daddy, I have a slave. He does not demand sex from me and never has. His gifts are large and I thank him for it. He is more like a well-off friend who likes to get beaten. He does not want to date me, as he is in love with someone else-occassionally we beat him up together. He is very kind and very smart and genuinely wants to be nice to women.
There are men like this. They are extremely rare however. Therefore, I would casually ask him what his intentions were, like in a passing convo. The ones that last the longest aren't even called sugar daddies, they are just very generous friends who adore and idolize certain types of women. What do you offer him? If the current answer is "nothing" then it's extremely likely that he wants sex from you.
I suggest you don't idealize the situation. Be realistic. You know what's going on better than we do.
Re:Potential Sugar Daddy?
I agree hon 150 dollars is crap! If I had a sugar daddy he would have to pay for the rest of my schooling at least! This guy sounds like a chump don't even wast your time with him.
Re:Potential Sugar Daddy?
I'm gonna warm you against this guy too, he sounds a little on the cheap side, and a good dancer friend of mine acquired a stalker this way- he "gave" her a little money until she told him that she wasn't interested in a relationship with him. Then it got really ugly. Keep it in the club, don't let him have any personal info.