If you had the chance to go out with a dancer, would you?
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If you had the chance to go out with a dancer, would you?
Nope, not worth the potential problems with that comes with a stripper. I dont need to be accused of something that I didnt do or even be put in that situation. Amber and all the other dancers, dont take this the wrong way, but most dancers are LOCO!!
Yes I would take her up on the offer and I would expect more than just dancing... Breakfast!
Wow! Difficult question Amber!
Some problems with this idea:
First, I think Money is right...there are some dancers who have mental problems..I know...I had a roommate once who was a dancer at a local club and I saw the guys she was taking home on a regular basis :o.
Second, there are inevitably some strings attached to a decision like going home with someone like that. A lot of guys go to clubs to avoid any strings.
Third, going home with her might change the relationship that you have in the club. It could cause problems. Also, once you know about someone outside the club, it might take away from the fantasy inside the club.
Reasons why I might go ahead anyway:
First, I'm a guy.
Second, I may have had a few and I might not be thinking straight.
Third, maybe I think we could pursue a real relationship outside the club.
It's a difficult call Amber...not sure I'd know what I would do until the situation arose.
If I had just met the dancer, I would decline, even if we just had a fabulous evening. One needs time to gauge all the foibles and nuances of someone, and to see if she is a Raving Psycho Hose Beast in disguise.
If I know her well and trust her, most likely, but it's not definite. Depends upon our in-house relationship. Some dancers I get along with well, tip well, and talk about things on a light basis, but the relationship is on the whole superficial for both of us. If it is someone who I wouldn't mind being a friend outside of the club, if perchance Atropos, Lachesis and Clotho wove our threads together, then I probably would. Still, I leave the final decision open for unforeseen factors.
This scenario has never happened to me, and I do not anticipate it ever happening, so its all theoretical in my case.
PJ
Sandy...no you're probably right...I think that was a stretch there....ultimately I think reason for going for it #1 would probably always overrule all the others... ;D
In regards to Sandy's reponse, all I have to say is that I think of Mr. Johnson, but not with it. Getting laid at all costs be damned loses its appeal over time, especially when you see what can happen when one doesnt use at least a modicum of caution.
This statement implies that "hooking up" is a Number One priority, psychoness be damned.Quote:
dont care if shes a psycho...maybe i'm a psycho. with that attitude youd never hook up with anyone.
Its fine for him, but not for me. Thats all.
"Hooking Up" in various forms, is just all fine and dandy. However, I would rather be sure that I am not hooking up with someone who is a closet wingnut. I don't live in fear of hooking up with a wingnut; I endeavor to make an informed choice if the "hooking up" opportunity comes about. Many a man has lost their wallets, homes, lives, and pet cats by not taking a few moments of cursory analysis.
So Earl.. you got that $500 I lent you to by loaves of sliced bread?Quote:
WOW...
merely... is this a true story???
If anybody ever asks for money, unless you are garaunteed you will be paid back, NEVER give it to them. I don't even loan money out to family members with the expectation of being paid back. If I loan money... I look at it as a gift and if it is paid back, it is a pleasant suprise!
Luv,
Amber
;D
Quote:
It's late in the evening... close to closing time and she says, "How about you wait for me!?... we can go back to my place."
Do you take her up on her offer?
If you do, what are your expectations afterwards?
Luv,
Amber
If I did, it would no longer be a subject for Web discussion groups.
Hmm, leave the comfy confines of the club for God knows where (and what).Quote:
You just had an incredible dance with a dancer you have built up a good dancer-customer relationship...
It's late in the evening... close to closing time and she says, "How about you wait for me!?... we can go back to my place."
Do you take her up on her offer?
If you do, what are your expectations afterwards?
Luv,
Amber
My hormonally crazed side says, "Go for it".
[evil]
My rational side recalls what happened in "The Catcher In The Rye" where Holden Caulfield invited the hooker up to his hotel room, or something like the situation ML brought up.
[nono]
Like Chuck, I'd simply prefer taking her to breakfast. Barring some nutcase robbing and shooting up the IHOP at 2 AM, nothing bad is likely to happen.
What's with the bias against psychological disorders? I happen to like cute girls with mild borderline personality disorder. I wouldn't go with her that night, but I'd talk about a future connection to create some anticipation and longing.
Been there, done that, but never home on the first date ;)Quote:
I wouldn't go with her that night, but I'd talk about a future connection to create some anticipation and longing.
enough said, I'd be all over that invitation, albeit very cautiously.Quote:
I'm a guy.
Oh I would definitely go and she would have the best sex of her life! :D
I would probably get the offer nut still keep an eye on the situation. I would probably do a litle investment and try to convince her to go in a neutral place: an hotel room.... just to play safe and see what she really is up to.
Well I'd like to think I'd agree to meet her later but try to go for a bite to eat (or something) instead of back to her place. I've never had a one night stand, and that's what I'd be thinking with an offer so forward. I'd like to think that even if I went back to her place we could stick to talking/making out, because I just don't move that fast. I'd like to think all that, but here's what would actually happen:
Dancer: "How 'bout you wait for me and we go back to my place?" ;)
lestat1: [shocked]
Dancer: "Umm, your mouth is hanging open..."
lestat1: "uhhh..." *gulp* "I, uhhhh..." *lestat1 swallows hard*
Dancer: "Should I take that as a yes, or what?"
lestat1: *lestat1 starts panicking*
Dancer: "Look, if you don't wanna go, that's fine, just say so or something."
lestatdl1: "No, it...I mean go but y'know...cuz' and it's so fast, I just with...uhhh!"
Dancer: "Just forget it, okay?"
lestat1: "...but...I just....if you...wait!"
Dancer: "Yes?"
lestat1: " . . . "
Dancer: ::)
Thus why I don't date a lot... :)
Let's see... have already built up a good dancer customer relationship Huh? Sounds like you are talking about my ATF here. She's already spent over 30 hours dancing (yes dancing time. All music no breaks) for me, countless more hours talking and waiting out DJ delays. We've already done the dinner thing and that lasted 4 hours. ;D (see guys the ability to talk is important! ;)) Lemme think real hard... I'd say the word "yes" couldn't come out of my mouth fast enough. LMAO!!! No doubt about it!!!!!! ;DQuote:
You just had an incredible dance with a dancer you have built up a good dancer-customer relationship...
It's late in the evening... close to closing time and she says, "How about you wait for me!?... we can go back to my place."
Do you take her up on her offer?
If you do, what are your expectations afterwards?
Luv,
Amber
So nice of you to keep the fantasy going between visits Amber! LOL. ;)
The key here is "you've built up a good dancer-customer relationship", which means you've done lots of talking inside the club and know each other as well as can be possible given the fantasy world atmosphere that exists in most clubs. Getting to know each other better outside the fantasy can only happen outside the club, and my guess would be that she wants to do that. Would it be for sex? Very possibly, but not necessarily. I had a girl ask me that and met her afterwards and we're still together after 4 years. We went back to her house and taked with each other until it got light out, then went out for breakfast. No sex that night, but we kept meeting both in and out of the club and it built into a wonderful relationship. People are people. Dancers are people and customers are people. Give it a chance and something nice might develop.
If that is the exact wording, then chances are I would say No. Of course I'm a guy, so I'd probably say Yes and then regret it when I got to her place and my primary brain started functioning again.Quote:
It's late in the evening... close to closing time and she says, "How about you wait for me!?... we can go back to my place."
Do you take her up on her offer?
If you do, what are your expectations afterwards?
I had this opportunity once about 3 years ago, and I blew it. I oh so ever blew it. But it was worded differently. It was an ATF whom I had gotten to know over a 4 month period. I went in there one night to visit when it was snowing outside.
And the wording was subtle, more like, "It'd sure be nice if I had someone to walk me to my car." And she walked me to the door, expectantly... it was more than subtle, I'm just obtuse.
And I did nothing. I'll be honest, I was new to going to clubs, still a bit immature and didn't know what to expect. I didn't think I wanted to date a stripper, but then she quit working a month later and I spoke to a friend of hers at the club and apparently that had been her plan.
But I didn't know that... because I didn't bother to take a chance and find out more about her.
Anyway, like I said. I would still be likely to reject the wording that Amber used because it implies sex, when I'm really more interested in pursuing relationships. But I don't expect to pursue relationships in a stripclub, so it'd have to be a combination of subtle with a strong boot to the head.
I hope that makes sense to someone.
If a dancer is selling physical affection, some guys get confused. There's a big difference between a nice guy who wants to have lunch and someone who wants to take you home.... I've had dancers ask to meet outside the club because they wanted a friend. I never thought of them as pathetic. It takes a healthy personality to say "I feel alone."
If I got to know and like a dancer, I would set up a playdate in a hotel. But only with the right lady ;)
Going home with a dancer can be a dangerous thing. Ya never know who might be waiting for you!
I agree with Sporty- I've had experiences with dancers outside of the club have been solely friendship based. A girl gets to know you inside of the club and realizes that she is telling you things about her life that she can't tell her family, her BF or most of her non-dancer friends. It's a logical extension-based on mutual trust-to want to further that friendship. There can be some pretty tricky obstacles but I've met several great women over the years for whom it was certainly worth the effort. As far as the "playdate" option-I'm with you Chuck, only at the Super 8...and only with the right lady.
Yoda, I think Chuck said HOTEL, not cheap motel. Just ask for the AARP rate and you can afford it.