So sad I wanna wanna curl up and die
Today I made a $3...
And it's the day after my birthday and hardly anyone remembered yesterday,
and today the dumb ass DJ played, instead of my usually 80's/new wave, hard core-i love my truck/tractor country...Not Shania Twain OR something I could actually dance to, but honky tonk!! I was so embarassed but I didn't run off stage, but I did cry & left early...One customer was even like, "omg the country girl!"...Ugh. I like that music, but not the sexiest stuff when you're trying to seduce guys. No cowboys in the audience either BTW.
And every guy I talk to first ended up dancing with someone else, and not even tipping me..Oh but I got offered golf lessons..Whats the point of doing this if I end up feeling ugly & broke to boot. Now I know how "extras" girls must have felt before they decided to do extras. I shouldn't have dyed my hair, nobody liked the red..and what a damn waste of money on all the customes I bought.
Re: So sad I wanna wanna curl up and die
You did not waste your money honey because you can go back to work and wear them! Don't let that horrible night stop you. Were you not feeling your best before work? I really have to prepare myself before I enter work. If I am not in that " feeling hot and who cares what others think mood", I don't make any money or have fun. I usually ask my dj to play certain songs that help me get into a better mood, and slip a few bucks as well.If they take care of me then they know I will take care of them. Try out you new hair color again, If you really feel uncomfortable with it after another work shift, then change it. Keep playing around until you find a hair style that makes you feel your very best. Make sure you sing in your car before work if you drive. Anything to lift your spirits before hand ! Then you will be able to brush off negative people in the club. As for music, keep what you like, and add a few songs that you think the the crowd will go for. In my opinion, I can only pick about 2 songs that Im not crazy for. If I cant feel that hot dance im having fun vibe, I dont think its worth it. I know i rambled on =/ ,but good luck!
Re: So sad I wanna wanna curl up and die
Another thing i would like to add,,, i feel that customers can sense when im not feeling my very best and am faking it. It affects my earnings. That why i think its ESSENTIAL, to uplift your mood as much as you can before hand. When im dragging along, my negative vibe drives along with me and i quit.
Re: So sad I wanna wanna curl up and die
Hon, it was a shitty night for you...not the end of the world. You KNOW you're hot (amazing, actually) and that any type of modeling (SC, Nude mags or other) would be lucky to have you.
Step 1 is convince yourself of that...YOU ARE HOT...YOU CAN DO THIS...
Step 2 is KICK THE ASS of the DJ, tell him (and the club manager) exactly what you will and won't dance to, and stick to it. The manager doesn't make dough when you don't so I bet he will back you up. THen ask what happend and why - maybe there's a good reason he "stuck you with" what he did (were you late to shift? asking for music he didn't have? was it just a bad guess on his part?)
Step 3 is try to laugh when crap happens...realize the DJ may be under some pressure from somewhere, might have just screwed up, or maybe is a few apples short of a bushel in the brains department...whatever happens (even if you fall on your face in the lap of a customer) make a joke of it...remember, you're great
Re: So sad I wanna wanna curl up and die
Happy Birthday! and concentrate on the road if you sing in your car !!!!!!!!!!
Re: So sad I wanna wanna curl up and die
Silky & Discrete,
Thank you :)
It's also like.. I feel left out when everyones drinking & getting silly, and im like a wall flower naturally..the being half naked isn't scary, it's the chatting part....That's why I worked on a fake ID till 4am last night for the next place I work...
I was in a good mood, called and said I was going to be an hour late due to traffic.. DJ is pissy because I've said I have no interest in him WHAT SO EVER(Not even friend wise, he's a crackhead), and he still wont stop calling me & beggin for me to come over. Then I mentioned another club & he's like "Oh your gunna have to suck dick there dont be a whore"
Re: So sad I wanna wanna curl up and die
Im sorry hun....we all have bad nights. Sometimes terrible.
I know how you must be feeling though... scared, nervous and not confident to go back to work right? Well, just think of it as a bad night and leave it at that. If you dwell on it, you will make your next night bad. Just go in with a smile and work it.
:)
By the way, happy belated birthday.
:hug:
Re: So sad I wanna wanna curl up and die
Too bad you don't work near me...I'd fix that. ;)
My condolences, EPD.
Re: So sad I wanna wanna curl up and die
Casual- Fix what part? lol :)
Yeah Friday will be better...I get to try out a cool blue/green hologram gown.
Lexi- Thank you for the hug :)
Re: So sad I wanna wanna curl up and die
Quote:
Originally Posted by EvilPixyDust
Silky & Discrete,
Thank you :)
It's also like.. I feel left out when everyones drinking & getting silly, and im like a wall flower naturally..the being half naked isn't scary, it's the chatting part....That's why I worked on a fake ID till 4am last night for the next place I work...
I was in a good mood, called and said I was going to be an hour late due to traffic.. DJ is pissy because I've said I have no interest in him WHAT SO EVER(Not even friend wise, he's a crackhead), and he still wont stop calling me & beggin for me to come over. Then I mentioned another club & he's like "Oh your gunna have to suck dick there dont be a whore"
You are shy, that's all. Conversation and small talk is a learned thing. Mostly the secret is to get the other person to talk about themselves, and to let them know it is OK for them to talk about themselves.
Why do you think guys have these crazy pick up lines? Because walking up to a stranger and starting a conversation is hard to do.
Re: So sad I wanna wanna curl up and die
Quote:
Casual- Fix what part? lol
Whatever part needs fixing...ahem...
;)
Re: So sad I wanna wanna curl up and die
Evil Pixie, NOW i definitley know how you feel. On Friday and Saturday nights, lost of people are drinking and in their own little party world. It's also hard when the guy asks you to join and have a drink with him. I am underage as well, but I dont think the fake ID is a good idea because it could cause a lot of trouble if discovered. Also,while the drinking is FUN..and helps you become more outgoing.... imagine how you will keep feeling the days after you drink. I really think it is much better to keep working on your social skills without the drinking. It's hard, and tempting to drink sometimes since im the only under aged dancer at my club. The nervousness will ease out naturally, it just takes some people a little longer to adjust to the fact that you have to be the initiator. I am slowly learning and adapting... but I notice that my social skills outside the club are improving as well. I am meeting guys and talking to them in my classes and all. My confidence is starting to increase alot. Stick with your beauty. Testing new ways and styles will boost your mood, confidence, and decrease nervousness. I save any drinking for once or twice a month so I can really enjoy it.
Re: So sad I wanna wanna curl up and die
Dear EvilPixieDust, Happy Belated Birthday!
I worked one birthday a couple years back where I pulled my arm while doing a pole trick, made ten bucks total, and was depressed because I knew my boyfriend was going to dump me. When I told the manager it was my birthday, he said, "Whoopie f*cking do."
However, when I got home I found my family had tacked up cards and letters for me to find. They had all gone to bed already so I didn't get to see them, but I'll never forget it.
Don't let this business make you forget what's important. Don't work another birthday. Go out with pals. Be with your family. Now, it's not even worth it to show up sometimes! So enjoy life instead of letting SCBS ruin a good thing.
Re: So sad I wanna wanna curl up and die
Quote:
Originally Posted by Casual Observer
Whatever part needs fixing...ahem...
;)
SMOOTH :rotfl:
Dont worry about it sweetie...it was just one day....i know it must have been shitty...but keep your head up.
Good luck and Happy belated Birthday. ;D
Re: So sad I wanna wanna curl up and die
:-*
Besides the usual stuff that goes with being and dealing with the "Sales" or "Hustle" part of dancing, on the non drinking note.... its all about illusion, while i choose not to drink though old enough to do so in my country, because i could never stop my mouth from saying what i truly wished to say to the indiscrete in immodest....here is a suggestion to what i used to do so I still seemed a part of the party and have a reason to be (though you may need to check how this will work with your laws etc) but i asked the bartenders for help and got them to fill a Raspberry cruiser (some premixed alcohol drink equivalent that you guys have that is red in colour?) with raspberry cordial and water (get an empty few from some other girls and wash out to use) and have them somewhere stashed in the fridge or just go to side and get them to fill it on the sly so customers don’t see. Alternatively if this is a risk (being that it looks like an alcoholic drink and may scare the owners for you being underage) get a soft drink...lemonade, coke, squash in a short glass that is used for spirit drinks in stead of the tall ones that clearly advertise non drinker. And drink red bull or some energy drink to counter act to sugar crash you may have!!
On a more Psychological level....its all about ritual for you to mentally prepare your self for all possibilities that may come in the night. I would go in to the club early, have my make up done, and be in comfy clothes and listen to my ipod while i stretched my muscles some where in the club alone, (like the lap room) before it opened and just try to ...Zen myself, make the club my own, see it as they were coming in to MY club not the other way around... defiantly sing on the way in to work! I had one song on the way in, and one for the way home! I was terrible at approaching customer, with the pressure of the sale, so would simply approach not with the idea of the sale just with practising how to do it... what questions to ask etc how to respond well to what they ask you. Eventually you see, it will be almost the same in one way or another all the time. So while you are still not doing so well, take the time to research. And dance your heart out on that stage to the music you love (if you can get it) The more routine and ritual you have in your night, the more control you can be of your emotions. and remember, a new night, is exactly that...A FRESH NEW NIGHT and yesterday can no longer exist with in you....its very Pollyanna but it helps. Some nights though...you wont be able to do this, wont be able to fight back the tears or depression from the frustration, and that ok, your human, its ok to not be BRILLIANT at this job, no one is ALWAYS brilliant at it as its a changing world and thus the expectations mirror that. Just accept your feelings, own them, feel them and don’t beat yourself up about it, remind your self its ok to be upset, most women couldn’t handle the kind of rejection dancers face in one night in a year of their life without crumbling. Just be kind to yourself, and give your self a a break when you need to regroup.
Its always going to have those dark moments in the quiet corners of the club, and accepting this makes it easier to get through them.
Re: So sad I wanna wanna curl up and die
Happy Birthday to you, and I hope things are looking up for you already!
Re: So sad I wanna wanna curl up and die
umm, the OP posted this in 2004!!!
Re: So sad I wanna wanna curl up and die
ahahah Happy very belated B-day OP!!
Re: So sad I wanna wanna curl up and die
ok, sorry from twit features here, new to here and negotiating the site, got caught up in the thread, didn't even see that date!
Re: So sad I wanna wanna curl up and die
Lmfao!!!!!! (@the bump [email protected])